🥰 @decrepted - Tumblr Blog

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toastbutteregg

punished-venom-solitair-e

disgustingplants

officialfist

bigenderteruki

The way this is straight up stolen

punny-trash

ppamelaisley

Okay but why was I so concerned about it on TikTok but I see on tumblr and I’m like oh that makes sense it’s fine

gayfirebird

Its because someone put their fucking face with that statement, its not funny anonymous internet person its justine who is 16 and someone's classmate

foone

I haven't seen it get mentioned on Tumblr yet but Samsung has just gotten caught in a hilarious scam: they apparently advertised how their latest phones can take great picture of the moon, compared to other phones!

But it turns out they aren't using machine-learning to clear up blurry pictures, they're using machine-learning to detect when you're taking a picture of the moon, and then they swap in a saved PNG file of the moon.

A reddit user figured this out by taking a photo of the moon from Wikipedia, blurring it in photoshop, then trying to photograph it from across the room with all the lights turned out.

Their Samsung phone somehow managed to "clear up" the blurriness and recover details that weren't there in the first place. Because it's just cheating.

foone

7,831 votes and 976 comments so far on Reddit

Here's the first reddit post in the saga.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Android/comments/11nzrb0/samsung_space_zoom_moon_shots_are_fake_and_here/

Next step obviously is for someone to disassemble the camera app, find the PNG, and replace it with something else.

gallusrostromegalus

TIME FOR TF2'S LOAD BEARING COCONUT TO SHINE.

ladydei

Allegedly from a Samsung 22+. C’mon tumblr, tear it up for me

Here’s what I don’t have the heart to tell him (friend who sent pic):

We are currently 3, maybe 4 days past full moon. It should not be such a perfect circle. That is not real.

derinthescarletpescatarian

Cyberpunk story where this sort of thing really takes off and by 2030 all of our photos are enhanced and/or have parts replaced and people get into amateur data analysis and space viewing using these enhanced tools that take way nicer and clearer images and something Really Fucked Up that's juuuuuuust a bit too difficult to notice with the naked eye starts happening to the moon but nobody notices for like a year until some astral traditionalist finally happens to point an actual physical telescope at it and everyone's like "how come no actual space agencies noticed this" and the space agencies all have to awkwardly admit "we haven't looked at raw unenhanced images of the moon for seven years either"

gpedia

Derin this is going to result in people asking for it as well you know that right. Gonna be space dragon robot AI all over again

derinthescarletpescatarian

They can't get it until we finish the space dragon story and we're a ways off the goals for that.

actually-ridley

Space Dragons? 👀👀

derinthescarletpescatarian

@actually-ridley right here

chellsky

how do we see the goals?

derinthescarletpescatarian

Should be visible on Patreon. The next chapter comes out at US $275/month. That'll probably take a long time though; in the meantime, I have plenty of other stories, one of which updates twice per week, over here. They don't have robot dragons though.

centrally-unplanned

Starving to death this morning because ive been to the new local cafe twice this week already and if i go a third time ill look desperate.

centrally-unplanned

Me: I like the goods and/or services you offer in exchange for my money

The cafe, in my head: lmao cringe, kill yrself buddy

centrally-unplanned

The endlessly wailing siren of my social anxiety issues is probably not going to be silenced by the people in the comments pointing out that being a regular at a restaurant is a normal thing for people to be, but I do zero-sarcasm appreciate the attempt, is very kind!

rustingbridges

I used to walk into [redacted nonpizza store] in my area and the guy behind the counter would immediately ask me if I wanted a pizza. truly I experienced the mortifying ordeal of being known as the pizza guy

compared to that being a regular at a normal cafe ordering normal breakfast items would be a real relief

centrally-unplanned

Literally dread this scenario, to have your identity *reduced down* to a single item order, to be known as such a plebian with such a restricted palette that your order can be charted in advance, oh widdle ash wants his chicken tendies uwu.

I agree having a set breakfast order is more socially acceptable than a set pizza order. But its not enough; its never enough.

Though life update: i did just go to the cafe in the end. I compromised with my anxiety by ordering a sandwich instead of my typical bagel. It was fine but not as good.

athingbynatureprodigal

on the flipside, we went to the same place for brunch a couple years, one time my buddy orders something new, and while he’s eating five different members of the wait staff stopped by to be like “did they bring you the wrong thing?”

centrally-unplanned

This thread needs a trigger warning keep the horror stories coming

zoobus

There was a bakeshop near my house that made soft ginger cookies and and macarons but only 2-3 good flavors. I walked in once and the cashier (who I definitely didn’t recognize) said “let me guess - ginger cookies and cookies-n-cream macarons, right?”

Needless to say, I never returned.

ranma-official

I once went to a McDonald’s, the cashier said “big mac combo meal and a chicken burger, right?” and I said “yeah” and then didn’t come back for two years

eikotheblue

This entire genre of concern so fascinatingly foreign to me! the cafeteria pizza guy knows I want 3 slices of whatever veggie pizza he has, and he will have them ready for me without me having to say anything besides a quick murmured thanks, and he smiles when he sees me and starts to grab them, and it feels so good! to be known, even a little bit, to be a small constant in someone else’s life… there’s just something so beautiful and precious and good in that, for me.

aurpiment

When I lived in [the city where I lived for undergrad] there was this place very close to my house with cheap and delicious lamb curry and the people at the counter knew my face and would start scooping the lamb curry into a bowl when they saw me come through the door. I thought this was lovely of them and always made sure to tip generously. Restaurant and regular is a mutually beneficial relationship.

st-just

Yeah there’s a bakery/cafe a few doors down from me and reaching the point where they a) remember my face/name and b) know my regular order meant that I can no longer get breakfast anywhere else ever.

collapsedsquid

Had the guy at the taco truck I routinely went to for lunch who asked me after a few years if I only ate burritos or something, no man I’m just don’t see the need to mix up my lunches.

fatsexybitch

As someone who’s been both front and back of house in various large and small food services: regulars account for roughly 40% of sales and thier consistency makes it easier to order supplies and keep stock levels stable.

As front of house my regulars were always a welcome sight, an easy serve and clear, a guaranteed a happy customer and pleasant interaction. Especially in diners or lunch spots where reliable turnover = tips and most people never come in more than once, having a familiar face who’s rhythms and tastes you recall makes the rest of your service work easier.

If you have any anxiety about being a regular somewhere just be sure to tip well, and you will magically transform from ‘pizza guy’ or ‘lamb curry dude’ to Beloved Favorite Regular and the servers will squabble to get you seated in thier section.

haveyoutriedrebootingit

When I worked for Domino’s Pizza, there was a guy who ordered a pizza, without fail, on Thursday at 6pm. Until the day he didn’t.

One of our drivers was delivering nearby and decided to check on the guy. Turns out the guy got home, got most of the way through the door, and lost consciousness. (If memory serves, it was a diabetic episode.) Driver couldn’t revive him and called 911. Saved the guy’s life.

dragongirltitties

when i worked in a remote office when i started my job, i went to denny’s for lunch enough that i’d just walk in and a server would go “take a seat over there, I’ll be over with your iced tea to take your order in a moment”

anarchapella

Food service workers love their regulars, especially if you’re a good tipper and are polite, we literally look forward to seeing you every day. Also service workers don’t care if you order the same thing, and us remembering your order means we like you.

blackwoolncrown

^^^^

Also no we aren’t “boiling your personality down to an item/order”, you are. We are offering you preference recall and welcoming you and your *presence* does in fact correspond to our need to give you a certain order. It’s okay for that to happen.

thesanityclause

For all my fellow social anxiety sufferers out there. Because my local coffee shop knows I always get iced coffee or a mocha and a biscotti and it stresses me the fuck out because I’m like “What if they think my order is dumb?? What if they’re like there she goes again stuffing her face with biscottis all the time” but nothing matters and a biscotti with your coffee in the morning really makes all the difference in what kinda day you’re gonna have.

anotherdayforchaosfay

I have pretty severe social anxiety, but there was a Chinese restaurant in [town I lived in for a few years] that made some of the very best egg drop soup, vegetable lo mein, and spring rolls. I ordered that every time I went there. They would seat me by a window in a quiet spot because they saw me put earplugs on when things got noisy.

Then I moved to a different but nearby town. I’m unable to drive (due to medical reasons) and public transportation didn’t go near the town. It was a year later, when I had a study group, that I was able to go there again. We had been taking turns for what restaurant we would eat and study at. We’d be there for hours, ordering several meals, and tip heavy, around 50%. Anyone one of us who couldn’t afford to eat or tip would be covered by the rest because several of my classmates were from wealthy families. They covered me more than once in exchange for drawings.

When it was my turn, we went to the Chinese restaurant. I walked in and they immediately knew who I was and what I favored. It was pretty dead in there, so we mostly had the place to ourselves. It ended up being a six course meal and five hours of studying and discussing the project. They brought me my favs as soon as they saw my plate or bowl was empty. The bill ended up at a little over $1k.

A couple months later, a friend took me there where we had a nice lunch after I finished my last exam. The owner approached our table and told me each of the students I had brought last time were now regulars. Some brought more people, and business was booming. They gave me a little card that said I would receive free meals for the next two years, as thanks for being a regular bringing in so many new people.

Before I moved across the country, I wanted to visit the place for a final meal before leaving. The place was closed with a sign that said “moved to new location.” The new location was near the university. So we went there, and the owner informed me that because so many of their new regulars were uni students, they moved. The place was easily 3x the size of their original. They told me it was always packed during meal times, and they now opened for breakfast with tradition Chinese breakfast foods. Business was booming, and all because of their regulars.

Being a regular is one of the very best compliments you can offer a restaurant, diner, meal trucks, etc. They love seeing you, especially if you tip well. I will likely never eat there again due to living more than 2500 miles away, but it feels good that my love for egg drop soup, vegetable lo mein, and spring rolls helped out a wonderful restaurant.

Be a regular. They love you.

digitaldiscipline

Listen. When I lived in new orleans, the boss would pay for lunch so he could write it off as a business expense. We went to the same Vietnamese restaurant almost every day for two years.

After my first week, they stopped giving me a menu the same way nobody else got one, and the only questions were “soup or salad” and “does anyone want tea”.

The owner would sit and shoot the shit with us if she wasn’t too busy.

You can have a favorite supermarket cashier, or barista, or sandwich maker.

animentality

Me: The Tasmanian devil is a voracious predator and should not be engaged with

Also me: Heehoo pupper

thefingerfuckingfemalefury

“Am jus

a lil creacher”

tharook

tasmanienerin

But have you seen…

BABY?

BABIES?

BABIES!!!

systlin

TEEF

thehotgirlproject

This kind of propaganda is going to lose someone a lot of fingers

frawgs

life actually gets better when you leave the house consistently btw like im serious

dykecosette

if you don't know where to go, just wander! go to the store and don't buy anything, go to the library just to sit and do whatever you were going to do at home, go to a park and just walk around/sit outside for a bit (weather permitting, of course)

just put some headphones in and walk around the block a couple times if you really have nothing else to do, just getting a bit of air and change of scenery is so good for you

anderswasrightt

me the first few weeks of forcing myself to go on daily walks (it gets better tho)

barilleon

Someone on Twitter posted this quote from Kurt Vonnegut about a conversation with his wife, which I think is super relevant here:

"Oh, she says, well, you're not a poor man. You know, why don't you go online and buy a hundred envelopes and put them in the closet? And so I pretend not to hear her. And go out to get an envelope because I'm going to have a hell of a good time in the process of buying one envelope. I meet a lot of people. And see some great looking babies. And a fire engine goes by. And I give them the thumbs up. And I'll ask a woman what kind of dog that is. And, and I don't know. The moral of the story is - we're here on Earth to fart around. And, of course, the computers will do us out of that. And what the computer people don't realize, or they don't care, is we're dancing animals. You know, we love to move around. And it's like we're not supposed to dance at all anymore."

We're here on Earth to fart around.

guerrillatech

midwest-merman-deactivated20210

Let service industry workers say “fuck” please

biblioaesthetica

I used to work at a sandwich place that also did lattes n stuff. We’d get nasty customers every once in a while, and when we did, we got to unleash Neal. Let me explain...no, it is too much, let me sum up:

The manager moved from the deep south to get this job, he’d been looking for a job in the PNW, and he somehow talked the owners into letting his platonic life mate, Neal, be the Assist Manager. So he, his wife, and his BFF forever come and take over this shop but the owners must not have actually...spoken...to Neal. He was INSANE. I mean, I never had trouble with him, but he frightened the new girls with his crazy eyes, liked knives way too much and looked like one of those tiny white guys who was spoiling for a fight and couldn’t back it up...except he could. 500 pounds of crazy in a 120 pound bag, you might say. But he was perfect, PERFECT for jerk customers who bullied new girls. Here’s an example:

So one day, I’m schlepping sandwiches, and I see the new coffee girl just...get yelled at by this big dude, who seemed way too comfortable yelling at strangers in front of other strangers in a line behind him, and maybe, if this had been somewhere else, he would have gotten away with it, because I have noticed strangers let randos yell at hapless teen college student girls who are tiny and just trying to get a buck man wow that is a whole ass THING anyway I stepped away from my sandwich, went into the back where Neal was slicing vegetables happily with a knife and tapped him in for an intervention.

My man Neal steps out from the back with knife in hand, bless. Steps up to the front and watching the chain reaction of coworkers hiding smiles, customers get big eyes, the new girl being alarmed and confused, and the big dude yelling just...not knowing what was about to happen was this...free show I just ate up om nom nom.

He does the managerial, what seems to be the problem (knife in hand), guy yells, wants his money back. Neal is all, so sorry, sure you can have money back (knife in hand slowly moving), guy yells, new girl steps back, unsure. Neal is all, but you can’t yell, sir, this a place of business, can’t we be reasonable (knife finally rest on counter, now Neal goes for his apron strings uh oh), and all the workers know this means Neal is about to be able to claim he was on break when he punched this guy.

Snacks are coming out. Tea is being drunk. Sandwiches are not being made. The whole place is bated breath on the free show. This is prime popcorn.gif territory irl.

Neal asks the dude to step outside, and the dude goes out! Big plate glass windows, everyone can see but not hear as the beast is unleashed. Neal is up in his grill, not touching, waiting just waiting for the yelling big dude to make the first point of contact. And folks, I am here to tell you that dumbass pushed Neal first and wow have you ever seen a hunting terrier just go for the ankles and take a beast down? It was like that. This guys chickened out so fast from the force of the maniac Assist Mngr ‘on his break’ and it was a beautiful thing to watch. Dude never came back, and the new girl was way more comfortable after that.

So hey. If you ever talk your way into running a shop where you know assholes are going to be mean to your workers, make sure to bring your feral best friend with the crazy eyes who likes knives way too much to defend them.

45percenterthen

crazy that all those 13 year old girls clocked dan and phil so hard. like mustve been intensely fucked up and invasive etc etc but so crazy that 13 year old girls worldwide were like those men are secretly gayandinlove and they literally were

45percenterthen

added a visual element

221btardisimpalawithloki

45percenterthen

awenravena

What is going on with the world??

dinodaddy-deactivated20221014

Jesus…

my-wanton-self-deactivated20191

In a move that has sparked outcry from archaeologists, historians and locals, the Peruvian government has approved a multi-billion international airport near the famed site of Machu Picchu, Peru’s single most important tourist destination. Bulldozers have begun to clear millions of tons of earth for the project, which will be located in Chinchero, a picturesque Inca town.

Building the airport in this location will destroy an ancient landscape, one shaped by the Incan people with terraces and routes.

Critics also suggest that planes flying low over the nearby village of Ollantaytambo and its archaeological park filled with ruins and a massive Inca fortress with large stone terraces, would cause incalculable damage to fragile Inca ruins there and destroy the peace and beauty of the area.

The new airport will make access to the site much easier, and thus encourage greater numbers than ever before to visit.

But Machu Picchu is already overwhelmed by almost double the limit of tourists as recommended by UNESCO. [see also India’s Taj Mahal - an incredible site simply reeling under a relentless, ineffectively managed tourist, both domestic and international, onslaught]

It’s the constant battle between protecting the past and profiteering from it.

roof-beams-deactivated20200106

https://www.theguardian.com/cities/2019/may/15/archaeologists-outraged-over-plans-for-machu-picchu-airport-chinchero

phoenixyfriend

Just as a heads up, this is still happening. The most recent article I can find on it is from when Hyundai E&C helped break ground back in Dec. 2021 (find here), and I can’t locate anything that mentions it being called off since, so… yeah. Looks like this is still an issue.

greek-orthodox-priest

went to miami to recover father sotirios. and made some new friends.

these animals... they are wise. I recruited them to avenge my dear brother. I was then escorted out of the sea world.

a-book-of-creatures

Better than the 1596 Marseille dolphin exorcism I suppose.

maxkowski

a-book-of-creatures

In 1596 dolphins were infesting the port of Marseille. Back in those days, y’see, dolphins didn’t have the cuddly image they enjoy today. They were pests and were causing damage.

So the cardinal of Avignon sent the bishop of Cavaillon to do something about them. In front of a huge crowd, the bishop sprinkled some holy water into the waters of the port and told the dolphins to begone. Whereupon the dolphins indeed turned tail in terror and fled, and were never seen again.

Still not as dramatic as Saint Bernard excommunicating the flies though.

melononthefloor

What happened to the flies?

a-book-of-creatures

Saint Bernard of Clairvaux built a monastery in 1124, but it was plagued by flies. So the good saint promptly excommunicated them. By the next day the flied had died in such quantities that they had to be shoveled out.

Still not as nutty as the Basel rooster trial though.

fatefulfindings

*everyone in unison* um what rooster trial?

a-book-of-creatures

In 1474, a rooster in Basel did the heinous and unspeakable act of laying an egg. As everyone knows, an egg laid by a rooster will hatch into a basilisk (or cockatrice).

So to avoid the creation of a cockatrice (or basilisk), the rooster was tried, found guilty, and burned at the stake along with its egg. A huge crowd was present.

The “rooster” in this case was likely a hen that had developed male characteristics (it happens).

Still not as properly legal as the Savigny pig trial though.

bonnettbee

Ok, clearly you want an excuse to talk about the pig thing, and I now DESPERATELY want to hear about the pig thing, so PLEASE tell us about the Pig Thing.

a-book-of-creatures

In 1457 a sow killed Jehan Martin, a five-year-old boy in Savigny. For that crime she was put on trial and judged guilty, and sentenced to be hanged from a tree.

Her piglets, however, were judged to have been innocent of the murder, and so were returned to the owner, with the caveat that he had to surrender them to the law if they were later found to have eaten any of the boy.

Not to be confused with a whole bunch of other, similar porcine trials.

I won’t mention the 1454 excommunication of eels in Lake Geneva then.

greek-orthodox-priest

the seaquarium of miami banned me from visiting for life if anyone even cares.

genderkoolaid

god those "primal" people who are like "our ancestors SLEPT ON THE GROUND and ate RAW MEAT and sometimes didnt eat for DAYS!! so thats how we should all be living its NATURAL!!" i truly am full of rage towards them.

like. first of all: being able to cook meat was Really Important for our evolution, so no dumbass, we arent "meant to eat raw meat" you fucking moron LOOK AT YOUR TEETH. WE ARE MADE TO EAT SAFELY COOKED MEAT.

second: who the fuck are these "ancestors". how far back are we going? modern humans? one of the other hominids? full monkee? you are idolizing a random point in our species' history because of whatever unscientific fantastical version of pre-modern life was. it wasnt hell on earth it wasnt paradise we were just LIVING.

third: DJFJSKBDFDSFCDHJFBS HARDER DOES NOT MEAN BETTER YOU CUNT. our ancestors lived hard lives because they HAD TO. and you know what? THEY TRIED TO MAKE IT EASIER!! do you fucking think people were laying on hard stone because of their amazing willpower? No! They were getting moss and animals pelts and shit to make it a little comfier! They were trying out spices! They were painting with their children! WE MADE CLOTHES FOR A REASON!!!

its just like. 100% based off the idea of early humans as jacked (white) cavemen who beat up dinosaurs with their hands and were constantly fighting. theres no humanity in your fantasy of early humans. our ancestors would be amazed and HAPPY with how far we've come with providing ourselves comfort and support. when someone was disabled in the past they werent (at least not always) killed or left to die. people cared for them! modern humans have a long, long history of making the best out of things and finding comfort where we can and always trying to make our lives better. eating raw liver doesnt make you better you dork

roach-works

chantek the orangutan regularly requested ice cream and cheeseburgers via sign language, and happily made his own jewelry. many great apes in zoos, from chimps to gorillas, will thread beads on string and wear them. one gorilla was observed ripping a feed sack along the seams and wearing it as a little shawl when she was feeling sad. a young chimp was observed playing with a dead squirrel as she watched her mother care for her baby brother, rocking the soft little body and signing baby, baby, kiss. another chimp raised by a human demanded her caretaker check under her bed each night for black dogs and crocodiles. in college when i was taking art history we were shown a little round pebble with two dots and a crease, that looked like a face, that was found thousands of miles away from where it should have been, and it’s theorized that it must have been carried by an early hominid who saw the face, and liked it. many ancient cultures that never invented the wagon nonetheless built wheeled pull-toys for their children.

our ancestors ate delicious snacks as often as they could get them and some of the earliest tool use was drilling holes in stones to make beads and spinning fiber for string. our cousins still make nests and rain hats and hug each other when they’re sad and do tricks for peanut butter and grape juice. we have always been as soft as the world allowed.