Random Nonsense

blah blah blah

[eicssbs]

warnings: check the tags on each story before you read!

here are my all-time favourite fics and series; i hope you love them as much as i do!! (btw i've just realised that i read A LOT about jason damn)

♡ bruce wayne

𑣲⋆ batman can save gotham, but not his marriage by @agatha-grc

𑣲⋆ family by @bat1nsignia

♡ dick grayson

𑣲⋆ he calls you clingy by @amoebadue

𑣲⋆ chronologically incorrect by @iydiamartinx

♡ jason todd

𑣲⋆ bring your parents to school day by @magikcheese3

𑣲⋆ overheard by @fancy-possum

𑣲⋆ marriage of convenience by @after-avenging-hours

𑣲⋆ just a break by @fancy-possum

𑣲⋆ why do you smell like that? by @4dian-nip-slip

𑣲⋆ not what you think by @4dian-nip-slip

𑣲⋆ unexpected guests by @iydiamartinx

𑣲⋆ glitter pens and hot chocolate by @shisuni

♡ damian wayne

𑣲⋆ cinderella, better get you home by @kurogxrix

𑣲⋆ obsessive fixation by @damselneedssaving

𑣲⋆ beg you to stay by @fawnindawn

𑣲⋆ we're moving out by @arachnidseyes

[emperor-neo]

PREODER ALFRED WAYNE FICS NOW!

[emperor-neo]

Watching this 3 in the morning drunk is peak cinema experience

[goldfishinaplasticbag]

selfishly, just once.

[goldfishinaplasticbag]

somebody requested for hiring jaybin to stare. so here he is

[goldfishinaplasticbag]

he say hi

[emperor-neo]

I have read every Baby Damian fics, all 561 of them.

I WANT MORE

I CRAVE MORE

I SHALL BREATHE BABIAN FLUFFS IF ITS THE LAST THING I DO

[emperor-neo]

I had the most enlightening dream I’ve ever had.

I was transported to Gotham in the middle of the night wearing nothing but my pajama (basically a boxer and a tank top)

I was super cold and stole some clothes which alerted Nightwing whom I apparently flirted too much which got me detained, but before he could dump me in the GCPD I revealed where I came from.

Batman basically grilled me by being too paranoid saying things like ‘I working with the Light blah blah blah’ then to gain their trust I revealed that I knew Jason is alive and baby Damian exists. Which promptly led the entire young justice and justice league to invade infinity island.

There was this brief cute reunion between Jason, Damian, and Bruce before it all went to shit. A LOT of heroes got killed including baby Damian. I was blamed for everything because they thought I led them to a Trap.

I proceeded to have this weird time-skip arc where I went into hiding gathering motherboxes and the spear of longinus and other artifacts and used my knowledge of DC to conquer their world.

To say the least, It went from a cute isekai reunion story to me being a power hungry super villain.

[emperor-neo]

I refuse to believe in Canon that Dick wasn’t Jon’s gay awakening.

Change my mind.

[emperor-neo]

To say this was the wedding of the millennium would be an understatement. When news of Tim and Kon’s engagement broke, the entire world seemed to freeze for a moment, as if collectively processing the sheer weight of it. The media devoured the story like starving hyenas, sinking their teeth into every detail. Tim Drake-Wayne, CEO of Wayne Enterprises, one of the youngest multi-billionaires in the world, was marrying a simple farm boy from Kansas—who, in a twist fit for a soap opera, was the estranged son of none other than Lex Luthor. It had everything: power, legacy, and the kind of drama tabloids lived for. And yet, despite the global obsession, the actual wedding was an intimate affair. No flashing cameras. No paparazzi swarming the beach. Just friends and family. The guest list, though, was something else.

I made a fic based on the random idea I got lol I hope you all enjoy it

[emperor-neo]

Man, TimKon has to have craziest in-laws. Imagine what headache the After marriage dinners get.

Duke: hey um… can you pass the salt *eyeing Lex Luthor*

Lex: *takes the salt but moves it away from Duke*

Selina: God why are you even in here?!

Lex: Because I am Conner’s BIOLOGICAL father unlike you, you stealing broad—

Lois: *tiredly sighs* Oh my God, here we go again…

Bruce: Blood relation means nothing, Lex.

Dick: to quote Maya Angelou: "Family isn’t always blood, it’s the people in your life who want you in theirs”

*Lex proceeds to stand up and points at the person at the end of the table*

Kate: now, this is gonna be interesting

Clark: Lex can you sit down?

Lex: for all my Intellect and prowess what I don’t understand is…WHY ARE THEY HERE!! *points at the Al Ghuls*

Talia: quit embarrassing yourself, Luthor. Timothy is my beloved’s son and brother to two of my sons—

Selina: *looks at Talia tiredly* would you please move on?

Talia: No! *slams the table* you are only his Girlfriend. While I am the Mother of his sons.

Selina: No sane mother trains her children to be weapons of war *pulls out her nails*

Talia: you haven’t seen this mother. *pulls out a sword*

Damian: Mothers, can you all stop? It’s embarrassing.

Minkhoa: as far as I’m concerned, I’m the spouse.

Bruce: Please I beg of you don’t do this Minkhoa

Jim whispers to Barbara: is it always like this?

Barbara whispers back: only during holidays

Jim: remind me not to attend during it

Stephanie: I could get why Talia is here but why is he here *sideeyes Ra’s Al Ghul* Didn’t you steal Tim’s spleen?

Ra’s: I am Talia’s father which makes me the detective’s father-in-law, by extension Timothy’s Grandfather.

*Alfred audibly cocks his shotgun under the table*

Jason: Crazy mental gymnastics there, geezer.

Ra’s: It is a shame that the detective’s choice to spend eternity is with that abomination…

Lex: you take that back, he’s genetically perfect! He’s half of my crush I meant rival and half of me! Me! you ancient terroris—

*a chorus of outrage erupts*

Jon: WOAH WOAH!

Dick: HEY!!

Luke: neglecting the part where Lex just admitted to—

*cuts short by Lucius Fox*

Lucius whispers: I strongly advise, you don’t add fuel to whatever this is, Luke.

Minkhoa: I mean he’s not wrong…

Tim leans on Conner: Welp, that checks my ‘racism at the table’ bingo card

Jean Paul: You are all sinners! I condemn this unholy matrimony! No man can marry a man much less born out of unnatural means!

Conner: There goes the homophobia one *checks the bingo card*

[emperor-neo]

I made a fic based on this!

I hope you all enjoy it

<a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/62991187

To say this was the wedding of the millennium would be an understatement. When news of Tim and Kon’s engagement broke, the entire world seemed to freeze for a moment, as if collectively processing the sheer weight of it.

The media devoured the story like starving hyenas, sinking their teeth into every detail. Tim Drake-Wayne, CEO of Wayne Enterprises, one of the youngest multi-billionaires in the world, was marrying a simple farm boy from Kansas—who, in a twist fit for a soap opera, was the estranged son of none other than Lex Luthor. It had everything: power, legacy, and the kind of drama tabloids lived for.

And yet, despite the global obsession, the actual wedding was an intimate affair. No flashing cameras. No paparazzi swarming the beach. Just friends and family.

The guest list, though, was something else.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/62991187

[emperor-neo]

I’m not sure what to label this but…

Imagine if, one day, the Batkids were all sharing stories about each other, remembering it as if Bruce had abused them. But in reality, it was just Bruce being overwhelmed by cute aggression.

Dick would recall his time as an 9yo Robin when Bruce would sometimes overcome by sheer cuteness aggression, would randomly reach over and shake his tiny head with one hand, like he couldn't quite handle how adorable Dick was. It wasn't harsh, but it felt overwhelming to Dick at the time.

Jason would remember getting painful pinches in the cheek and being told ‘you’re getting fatter chum’ by Bruce wearing a mischievous grin like a cannibal billionaire. But it’s just Bruce being proud of how he much he has grown and healthier.

How Damian would remember being rag-dolled/squished around by his father masking it as ‘training’ because Bruce knows Damian wouldn’t allow to be babied and it’s his only chance to adore his young son.

Is this under hurt/comfort idk

[veliya01]

Caught in the act

Jason pocketing food is kinda funny since I did base this illustration from someone I know.

[zombiewithaflowercrown]

This is cute until I remember the fic I read where Jason had a food stash in his room where’d he’d hide stuff and Bruce found it all expired months after his death :’’’

[emperor-neo]

Plsss what fic is that😭

[emperor-neo]

Can I ask something? I know this isn’t really anything substantial or worth noting I just find it weird that Tim Drake tag is the only one in the Batfamily AO3 tag to have a “(DCU)” right next to it.

Are there any Tim Drake names in other medias? As far as I know he’s the only one, curiosity is killing me rn.

[emperor-neo]

Hey! I saw you post about Damian thriving in Apocalypses, can you elaborate on that? I only know of Dceased and DC vs Vampires.

Once or twice is coincidental but when it happens a bunch of times? It becomes a pattern, it seems to me DC likes to see this kid suffer.

Like we know the DCAU one, where Darkseid won and decimated earth. Damian assumes the role of his grandfather and leads the league of assasins.

As aforementioned the DCeased one where an antilife technovirus spreads across the globe, killing several heroes including Damian’s father. Which he would later assumes the role of (look how bloody hot he is here like wtf)

Another in DC vs Vampires, wherein Vampires took over the world and Damian leads a resistance against the Vampire world.

How about a timeline where Brother Eye/the OMACS has plunged humanity into a massive metahuman war leaving earth barren. 100+ year old Damian leads the Justice League.

A universe where an unnamed apocalypse destroyed the human civilization, Damian leads a military elite team, called the Hawk Patrol.

Lastly a timeline where a nuclear armageddon occurred and Damian assumes the role of an Immortal Batman.

I’m sure I missed a few since the term “apocalypse” is kinda hard to determine like ‘do I consider Dark Knights Metal Resistance thing? But didn’t they stop that? Kinda dilemma’

[titans-thoughts]

What about the future where he floods the world? Per the Legion.

[emperor-neo]

Oh yeah! Where he was made out to be a some sort of Hitler figure because of his supposed future.

[emperor-neo]

Hey! I saw you post about Damian thriving in Apocalypses, can you elaborate on that? I only know of Dceased and DC vs Vampires.

Once or twice is coincidental but when it happens a bunch of times? It becomes a pattern, it seems to me DC likes to see this kid suffer.

Like we know the DCAU one, where Darkseid won and decimated earth. Damian assumes the role of his grandfather and leads the league of assasins.

As aforementioned the DCeased one where an antilife technovirus spreads across the globe, killing several heroes including Damian’s father. Which he would later assumes the role of (look how bloody hot he is here like wtf)

Another in DC vs Vampires, wherein Vampires took over the world and Damian leads a resistance against the Vampire world.

How about a timeline where Brother Eye/the OMACS has plunged humanity into a massive metahuman war leaving earth barren. 100+ year old Damian leads the Justice League.

A universe where an unnamed apocalypse destroyed the human civilization, Damian leads a military elite team, called the Hawk Patrol.

Lastly a timeline where a nuclear armageddon occurred and Damian assumes the role of an Immortal Batman.

I’m sure I missed a few since the term “apocalypse” is kinda hard to determine like ‘do I consider Dark Knights Metal Resistance thing? But didn’t they stop that? Kinda dilemma’

[emperor-neo]

Omg, I just had an epiphany.

Narratively speaking, it is by far perfect for Damian to end up as a Doctor rather than as batman or head of league of assasins. Damian’s core character and struggles revolve around his legacy, Damian always felt pressured to choose. What better way to subvert choosing a legacy than to find a common ground between both.

We all know both of his grandfathers went to medical field; Thomas Wayne was once a doctor while Ra’s al Ghul a former physician. Both believed in making the world a better place (albeit twisted in Ra’s case).

And now that Alfred is dead (RIP) there is a gap left in Batman’s crusade. A medic and caretaker. Something no one would’ve expected from Damian.

[carnicer01]

Licking each other's wounds

[emperor-neo]

Lmao Damian playing minecraft in the batchair