Being a fangirl

Hey guys! I am a 20 year old fangoddess. I am in literally too many fandoms to keep track of! If you guys like the stuff I reblog, then go and click on the "Follow" button and enjoy!

[ms-demeanor]

I am a glorified office administrator who understands server hardware why am I the only person in this company who gets what social engineering is?

[ms-demeanor]

Total stranger on the phone who we’ve never spoken to before: I have power of attorney over the CEO of this corporation and we are a customer of yours. Please change the administrator password on the server to XXXXX

My boss, putting on white grease paint and a red wig: Oh, of course! Let’s do it quickly so that you’ll want to keep working with us since you’re going to be making business decisions!

Me: I would sell you to satan for one corn chip and I’m allergic to corn but before you do this maybe you should call someone who is actually on our contact list for our customer and see if they’ve ever heard of this stranger.

My boss, looking through a selection of shoes that honk when you walk: Oh, but she said that it was very important that none of the employees know what was happening because they’re making staffing changes.

Me: As your lawyer I recommend that you just call a single one of our contacts and see if they’ve ever heard of her name.

My boss, shoving all of our technicians into a VW beetle: You’re not my lawyer.

Me: HOW THE FUCK WOULD YOU KNOW? I COULD BE! YOU SHOULD MAYBE CHECK ON THAT.

[yoursjupiter]

TIL everyone’s employee ID at my company is the last five of their SSN.

Boss: On the bright side, it’s only the last five

Me: YOU CAN COMMIT FRAUD WITH FOUR

[zevveli]

Security firms that are hired to check the security of banks will often use the following tactic: They will walk up to the teller in a suit with their ID badge and a clipboard and go:

“Hello I am [name] from [security firm] we’ve been hired to verify the security of the facility I need to see your computers.”

“Erm…I’ll have to verify that with my managers.”

“Congratulations, you have just passed the security verification.” [Scribbles on clipboard] “But in all seriousness I do need to verify your security so I need to see your computers.”

“Oh okay.” AND LETS THEM IN.

[palindromordnilap-deactivated20]

“Social engineering” is a way too fancy word for what it is. I know a guy (not personally) who broke several people out of prison by essentially writing “Greetings, please release this person, signed, whoever the judge is” on a piece of paper and faxing it there. Because no one would have a fax machine in their own house I guess.

[closet-keys]

not to derail, but holy shit that praxis

[cal-is-a-cuddlefish]

I’ve had clerks just give out a whole ass SSN when I asked.

[airandangels]

An inspection in 2014 found the password for the Louvre’s surveillance camera system was “louvre.”

[sexuallyfrustratedavocado]

everyone talks about how strong and great Aragorn was for refusing the ring when Frodo offered it to him as if this man has not spent his entire life dodging leadership and responsibilities like bullets in the matrix 🙄

[lesspopped]

[homunculus-argument]

If Ratatouille mechanics were real, there would be a whole market of businesses offering the services of operating rats to people who want them, and it'd be like how bees produce honey. People in the rat business would be so exhausted of having to explain over and over again that no, the rats aren't being exploited. If the rats didn't like how they're being treated, they would simply not return. There's no goddamn way to force a rat to be so passionate about playing the saxophone that they'll figure out how to puppeteer a human to do it for them. All that the business does is finding a way to put that specific rat in the hair of someone who's about to go on stage.

[terrie01]

The rats 100% think the businesses are being run for their benefit and worry about the humans being exploited.

[homunculus-argument]

A rat manager who is a rat and deals on their end of the deal is exhausted of having to explain over and over again that look, an average fully grown adult human being is like 200 times your weight, their hands are very fast and they can throw things better than you want to imagine. If one of them things didn't want you in their hair, you're not going to stay there for long. You'd be yote out the window in two seconds flat.

[pucikat-deactivated20200924]

i had a really fucked up dream omg

[my-notes-app-deactivated2020061]

p&f related?

[pucikat-deactivated20200924]

sorry but phineas and ferb were not in it.

[my-notes-app-deactivated2020061]

buford?

[pucikat-deactivated20200924]

no characters from phineas and ferb were there.

[wolveswolves]

Wild wolves in Finland by Niko Pekonen

[grimandghoulish]

reblog if you remember what it felt like to walk into blockbuster

[willowofthehearth]

If you’re reblogging this maybe also do a couple stretches. Gods know our back and shoulders could use it.

[lilisonna]

The aging of the Tumblr userbase does more for my stretching routine then anything else.

Thank you, my generational cousins. I will go and stretch now.

[mysterium-solis]

Sword Illustrations by Ma-Ko (2018-21)

[falsedetective]

cake is such an underappreciated band. i can’t believe we brought back low rise flare jeans before we brought back cake in the top 40

[falsedetective]

i’m just saying cake’s music would be widely regarded as so sexy if it wasn’t for all the mariachi horns and vibraslap and the vocalist didn’t always sound like he was explaining his suicide plans to a gun store clerk in sacramento. the world wasn’t ready for them

[digital-morganism-deactivated20]

The fact that it sounds like a dispassionate reading of a terrorist manifesto is a feature

[queerliblib]

it’s a beautiful day to check out a book from the library

[meeliesaysno]

its a beautiful day to return a book to the library unread after it auto renews 3 times

[ksfoxwald]

The library says thank you for boosting our circulation stats and the book will still be here later if you want it another time <3

[tinyyellowflowers-blog]

Went to the grocery store with my kindergartener. We weighed some bananas: 2 pounds even. We weighed a watermelon: 4 pounds even. We weighed some mangos: a little over 1 pound. We weighed the watermelon AND the bananas: 6 pounds even.

“That’s funny” said the child “because 2+4=6 and two pounds and four pounds is six pounds. It’s like the same as math!”

“What happens if you add 6+1?”

“SEVEN”

“What if we put one pound of mangos on the scale?” <mangos added>

“IT’S THE SAME!!”

“OK, what’s 7-4?”

“Three?”

“What if we take the four pound watermelon off the scale?” <watermelon removed>

“Mama! Are you telling me math works In Real Life? Think of all the things you could measure!!”

[neatlymanifolded]

[rainformation]

formative years? aren’t they all?

[absolutejamer]

show me a permanent self and i will show you a facade or a corpse

[fablesrose]

And yet, even a corpse is ever changing.

[homunculus-argument]

A sick wizard castle with a nondescript van painted on the side. A gothy pin-up girl with the portrait of a random trucker tattooed on her thigh. A bathroom-themed beach vacation. A beautiful brightly coloured cupcake that tastes like soap.

[quite-possibly-haunted]

Jesus with a portrait of my grandma on his wall. A scimitar-wielding fantasy protagonist reading about the adventures of sixth-grader Kelsey. A National Park with a framed print of somebody’s living room.

[homunculus-argument]

I'm not religious in any christian way but the thought of Biblical Jesus having a whole gallery wall of pictures of every single grandma with a jesus on her wall is cute.

[wannab-urs]

he definitely fucks but there’s no way he fucks normal

[archliches]

man c'mon

[broken-horn-of-equius]

[enlightened-moth]

[kaity--did]

Listen to me. Listen to me. Listen to me. Listen to me.

I know there is a lot of discourse (tm) around this right now but listen to me

sometimes you do just have to lie to children.

[kaity--did]

If, when my toddler is, you know, toddling around saying “mama? Big ball?”

If I were lean down and say “unfortunately the big beach ball for some reason fills you with such an unadulterated rage that is beyond human comprehension that you scream until you pass out, so mama had to remove the beach ball from the premises until you can better regulate your emotions” she would simply stare at me like I had 3 heads full of equal betrayal.

So, for now, instead “big ball went night night!”

[kaity--did]

Please understand when I say “removed the ball from the premises” I mean I popped it in a fit of exhausted confusion. I murdered the beach ball.

See I’ve lied to you all too and it was better this way.

[inkloom]

you can’t just leave this in the tags etc.

[kaity--did]

You can’t be funnier then me on my own posts, I’m in tears from laughter

[queer-as-city-folk]

Old man, sitting in the pool steps reading his book

[queer-as-city-folk]

Artists sketch

[spacemancharisma]

UNRESTRAINED SUMMER FUN

[petcrparker]

He’s been dead for 8 seasons but the hate everyone has for John Winchester is still burning strong

[somethingwittyandsarcastic]

13 years later, we’re still hating on him. 21 years dead and he hasn’t gotten any more popular

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

“If I had time travel I’d kill Hitler” “If I had time travel I’d stop my favourite politician getting assassinated” you’re all thinking way too small. If I had time travel I’d stop Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin from dying on the moon due to Soviet sabotage, kicking off the Great Nuclear War and devastating half of the planet.

[stavarosthearcane]

Good Job.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#this post gets me every time 

It’s from two days ago fam how many times could there have been

[heroofthreefaces]

do you think no one else has time travel

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Happy one month anniversary to this post that has not allowed me a single day of fucking peace since I made it.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#surprise reblog!! 

STOP IT’S BEEN MONTHS. MONTHS!

YOU CAN STOP.

[roach-works]

wow if only you had a time machine

[transdaughterofthesun]

Honestly having reached a billion notes I think it’s safe to say that in the Year of our lord 2041, this is the most popular tumblr post out there.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

I’m killing your parents before you’re born

[iforgotmyfandom]

:)

[idiototheinternet]

Still here, why’d you hesitate @derinthescarletpescatarian

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Your mum’s ability to hold up under active gunfire was really hot. I’m your dad now.

[lizyarikus]

Isn’t that the plot of Terminator

[anexperimentallife]

Where do you think the plot for Terminator came from?

[what-if-i-just-did]

This is such a classic trainwreck post that has the vibes of a 2014 screenshot posted to Pinterest and then the last addition is just last Tuesday I can’t even

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Imagine how I feel

[mrsjdavis]

POST, LIVE FOREVER!!!!!!

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

It doesn’t have to

[smegorl]

Yes it does.

[serenamidnight]

BRING IT BACK BOYS

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

I don’t deserve this

[stitchposts]

[official-dad-blog]

Saw this post transcribed, in modern English, in a scroll in a Belgian monastery in 1648 AD. Timestamps and all. The edges were tattered and it had a stain that smelled of Dr. Pepper on it. It gave me terrible dread.