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@ginnyvos
Welp, the news is out! Starting at the 16th of January I'll be taking over the GM chair from @taimaland for the next season of Lake Wonder on Roll the Role with @raafling, @arbys-haunted-turnover, @taimaland and @1badgoldfish as my amazing players!
I am... so scared but so excited!
real talk why do so many fantasy universes think giant spiders are necessary
The sad part is there’s a decent chance a large proportion of them can be blamed on one spider.
The tarantula that bit JRR Tolkien as a child.
He swore he didn’t have a spider phobia and the experience had nothing to do with the man-eating giant spiders in The Hobbit, the even more giant and even more man-eating spider in Lord of the Rings, or the unholy eldritch spider from outside creation that plunged the world into darkness and made literal Satan scream like a little kid in the Silmarillion. Very few people believe him.
Given LotR’s influence in the fantasy genre, there is a high probability that tarantula is the progenitor of even more fictional spiders than Ungoliant was.
wow fuck that one tarantula
“fantasy universes have too many spiders” factoid actually just statistical error. Georgs Spider, who bit JRR Tolkein & is to blame for menacing over 10,000 fantasy universes, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
there’s giant spiders in the one im working at but it’s because @ginnyvos thinks spiders are the bomb dot com and @manicpixigirl made a spider child we all love
This is because thay are, in fact, The bomb dot com. Have you looked at them? Like actually looked? Beyond the "oh creepy spider ewwww"? They're gorgeous! And they weave these intricate webs and catch so many harmful bugs!
Now if you want a thing to actually hate? Misquitoes. Because fuck them. They should all die.
Petition to have a cool fantasy epic where the villain is a bloody mosquito.
(I suppose an argument could be made that that's vampires. Still though)
Just a little pick-me-up.
Went to the grocery store with my kindergartener. We weighed some bananas: 2 pounds even. We weighed a watermelon: 4 pounds even. We weighed some mangos: a little over 1 pound. We weighed the watermelon AND the bananas: 6 pounds even.
“That’s funny” said the child “because 2+4=6 and two pounds and four pounds is six pounds. It’s like the same as math!”
“What happens if you add 6+1?”
“SEVEN”
“What if we put one pound of mangos on the scale?” <mangos added>
“IT’S THE SAME!!”
“OK, what’s 7-4?”
“Three?”
“What if we take the four pound watermelon off the scale?” <watermelon removed>
“Mama! Are you telling me math works In Real Life? Think of all the things you could measure!!”
Foul beast ate that adventurer whole, RIP
Two Hot Guys After Playing Beachmitton for FatT pin up week Beach Day ^_^
My friend sometimes brings her six-year-old to our DnD sessions and my husband (the DM) lets her roll for all enemy attacks and sometimes he will show her a few figures and let her secretly pick what creature we meet next. Who needs encounter tables when you have a first-grader around
She cheers when the monster is winning.
DM: *places an ugly, slavering, repugnant, spine-tingling creature on the battle map*
Child who can barely see over the table: ᵗʰᵃᵗ’ˢ ᵐᵉ :)
jack character/ali character yuri save me...
Perpetua Parties: Eastern and Western Continent
Which path should he choose?
The path of the warrior, the path of the scholar, or the path of the artist?
he should wander away and have a picnic while he thinks about what path to choose
Great idea! But where should he have the picnic?
Under the tree, or under the old fort?
By the sea, so he can enjoy the sound of the waves
A lovely choice!
Should he build a sandcastle to pass the time? Or perhaps go fishing?
Perhaps he could collect shells he finds interesting
Sounds fun!
Which shell should he pick up?
This one
That's not a shell, it's a tiny earpiece.
Should he listen to music? Or to the mysterious pre-recorded message?
He should give it back to the crab in the largest shell, they thought they had lost their wave-pod and are grateful he found it!
The crab wants to give a gift in return.
Should he accept the gift of power, or the gift of knowledge?
the gift of friendship :)
Friendship acquired!
Should they celebrate with pizza or ice cream?
The crab friend cannot eat either of those! Let's split a nice seaweed salad instead. :)
So many options!
Should they get tossed salad, wiggly salad, or spiky salad?
Seasar salad
Nothing beats getting it straight from the source
Should they use scissors or claws to cut the seaweed?
What about that sword in the first panel?
The circle is complete.
Through choices, friendship, and salad, he found his way to the path of the warrior. But he won't walk it alone.
Their path is just beginning, but this story is over.
Thank you to everyone who participated!
This is all the worst and best parts of being a GM. Thanks OP. You did a great job.
do you guys know about the internet roadtrip? right now somewhere between 500 and 900 people are collectively 'driving' a car on google street view trying to make it to canada. it's fun i recommend it
also the car goes hilariously SLOW. they've gone about 35 miles over the past 12 hours. this is gonna be a longass roadtrip
the internet road trip car has a radio that gets like 5 local stations. everyone in the car has gotten really into WBOR, a college station in maine. (we're still in maine. we're going to be in maine for days) they've decided to take the car to the station but in order to make sure they arrive during the day while the djs are on air, they're killing time by driving around backroads on islands
big news, i just tuned in and the car has made it to brunswick maine, estimated to arrive at WBOR hq in 30 mins. the radio was playing an early round of applause
the dj is playing traditional french music from the 60s right now and is following the progress of the car which is taking a scenic route to see the sights of brunswick
we are HERe we are triumphantly honking while french music plays on the radio
WBOR is rickrolling us
Man, Javk the Quidt really has done it again huh? The new soundtrack is always something I massively look forward to when a new season starts, but they've really pulled off Realis and Perpetua in a row! We're all of 2 episodes into Perpetua Proper and I'm already having feelings about it.
Realis I started pretty much dancing with happiness the moment I heard it.
Jack is so talented, I can't even. They're brilliant!
please….. please everyone im losing my fucking shit
Where do you store your bread
On the counter/in the pantry
The fridge
The freezer
I put half in the freezer half on the counter
Some other place
I don’t eat bread/results
reblogs for reach are so so so appreciated i want this to get to as many people as possible im trying to gather data
Sir Terry Pratchett is a master of the written word but he ain’t shit for the way he trained me to accept dumb naming conventions because i got three missed calls on my phone from Scam Likely and I spent like half a day wondering who I knew named Scam.
Discworld Heritage Post
Mr. Scam Likely of the Ankh-Morpork Thieves’ Guild
Scam Likely and Snitch Nightly would be *ahem* thick as thieves
this man is the one true ally
SIXTY FIVE THIRTY FIVE IM DYING
CC:
Brother: What does the order mean?
Person filming: They/she?
Brother (increasingly frantic): Yeah but I’m, I don’t wanna fuck it up. Is it— what does that mean you said she/they and then you said “oh wait no use they/she,” which one do I use?
Person filming: They- they more than she.
Brother: Oh god
[laughter from the person filming]
Brother: Okay, like, how- how much more though? Is it like if- do I- am I being an asshole if I say, like, they maybe like 4 times and she 2 times?
[more laughter]
Brother continued: Or is it like, 60-40? 65-35?
