[charlataninred]

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

[meraarts]

Might I add:

The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

The woman who raised the changeling alongside her biological child

The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

[eater-of-hopes-and-dreams]

The adventures of a space roomba

Cinderella finding Araura (and falling in love)

I don’t know a snappy description but the my nemesis cynthia story certainly lives in my head

[blitzlowin]

hilariously, these are almost all in my fic tag. so, a compiled list from the notes (and some extras):

The God of Arepo (graphic novel 1 / 2 / 3) (ebook)

The Monster of Sentan

The Witch’s Cat

Raise Both Children

Stabby the Roomba (honorable mention)

Cinderella Marries the Prince (comic)

My Arch Nemesis Cynthia

Pirates and Mermaid

Eindred and the Witch

The Demon King

The Cornerwitch

Grandmother Beetroot

Apocalypse Daycare Worker

Grandmother Accidentally Summons a Demon

New Year Saga

A Story About Changelings

Ranger in the King’s Forest

The Difference Between a Hare and a Rabbit

Goblin Men (Canines)

[charlataninred]

I am in love with you /p

[inkvoices]

Adding Faceblind Prince Charming and Cinderella

[inkvoices]

21. The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

22. The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

[lightningladybug]

adding the Doctors Without Borders one

[inkvoices]

I LOVE tumblr storytime, so here’s a bunch more your weekend reading. Enjoy!

24. The Queen with Three Cursed Children

25. Tiny Dragon with one coin hoard

26. Haunted house

27. Shark hero was about to go rogue

28. Grandma lives in the woods comic

29. A Different Aftermath comic

30. Battery (microstory but I love it so much)

31. It’s A Date comic

32. Supervillian kidnaps rival’s kid and they want to stay

33. Narrative Town

34. I have been hired to clean the wizard tower comic

35. Robot Apocalypse

36. The Statues That Do Not Weather

37. Kushiel

38. Tooth Fairy

39. Alien abduction

40. Felonious wish-granting

41. When humans met actual space orcs

42. Space cousins

[dannnnnnnnnnnnex]

WAIT REBLOG THIS VERSION INSTEAD

[h4harts]

Does anyone have the link for the retired superhero who uses a gun to stop a supervillain and explains how the trolly problem is evil?

[nasa]

Fly Your Name Around the Moon Aboard Artemis II

The Artemis II mission will soon embark on an incredible journey. Starting from NASA’s Kennedy Space Center in Florida, the mission will launch into Earth orbit, complete a lunar flyby, and then return to Earth — all with four astronauts aboard.

And the best part? We’re bringing you along for the ride.

Time is running out to fly your name around the Moon aboard Artemis II! Sign up here and your name will be uploaded on an SD card that will join the astronauts inside of the Orion spacecraft during their lunar mission. Don’t forget to download your boarding pass!

Make sure to follow us on Tumblr for your regular dose of space!

[chamiryokuroi]

MEXICO WIN!!! FUCK AI!!!

[lastoneout]

[fat-models]

https://www.instagram.com/selkie/p/DI0GpAsxvqO/?img_index=1

[abbiistabbii]

The Germans really cooked making "Hobbyless behaviour" an insult. It is both devastating, applicable to a wide range of people and behaviours, and doesn't resort to swearing.

Man ranting on the internet about the Superbowl halftime show or complaining that something is "woke"? Hobbyless Behaviour. Girls mocking another girl for not looking right? Hobbyless Behaviour. Mindless vandalism? Hobbyless Behaviour.

It is more powerful than "get a life" or the English "You're Sad" because it gets to the central point of the matter, and that is wonderful. Danke, Deutsch.

[absolutely-esme]

I like it because it cuts to the heart of the matter: out of all of the things this person could have used their time and energy on, why did they choose this?

Was there truly nothing they could have been doing instead that brought them joy? Or did they simply choose harm over happiness, leaving their own lives less enriched by denying themselves good things and choosing instead to engage with things they don't even like?

I've oft wondered where people get the energy for hatred. I've come to realize recently that it's coming out of other parts of their lives.

[battlecrazed-axe-mage]

So we're all gonna let the new Harry Potter show die on the vine, right? No hatewatching. No thinkpieces. No videos about how bad it is. Deprive it of oxygen and let it wither away unremarked-upon and unprofitable; make HBO lose their entire investment and prove to the corporate entertainment sphere that the entire IP is poison. And spend that time doing something that brings you joy instead.

[joy-and-whimsy-official]

Official joy and whimsy post

[teaboot]

Highly unlikely to be of use but I want a card I can carry in my wallet that says “If I Die First In A Traumatic Survival Scenario I Want You To Know I’m Okay With You Cannibalizing Me, It’s Fine, Don’t Be Weird And Guilty About it”. And then on the back there could be like. A list of recipes n shit

[teaboot]

To be clear, I don’t WANT to be cannibalized. It’s not my personal preference. It’s just that if I beef it out in the open somewhere and some poor starving fuck has to have a crisis of ethics over using the protein or dying in a hole, I’d want to some way to let them know my dead ass is rooting for them

[teaboot]

New Hot Take: I Think An Organ Donor Card Counts In A Pinch, Actually

[mawofthemagnetar]

Cold take but all languages are beautiful actually. Every single one. Every single human language on earth is a collection of stories interwoven into the very fabric of the words that are spoken.

“Oh but this language sounds scary-“ have you heard a child speak it while pointing at a butterfly?

“Oh but this language sounds silly-“ have you heard someone’s grandma recite a recipe with such practiced ease it comes off as poetry?

“Oh but this language is really weird-“ and yours isn’t? Everyone’s language is weird, dumbass, it came free with your fucking humanity.

Every tongue that is spoken is a work of art. Every language a unique window into the world.

Isn’t it wonderful?

[kathgelia]

[cach1nnate]

i love when muslim women do makeup 2 match their hijabs its so pretty

[beanthebugboi]

Seconded, and I would like to add: hijabi cosplayers. SO fkn cool.

[cach1nnate]

:00000 that is so cool

[cach1nnate]

waowowwwowow

[cach1nnate]

!!!!!

[nightofgolgotha]

"what groceries u been into recently" is actually a great question, there's a bunch of good conversations inside it

[going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi]

my greatest accomplishment in life is that I inadvertently made my friend break up with her shitty boyfriend by throwing her a really fucking awesome birthday party

[going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi]

okay so I fucking love event planning and decorating and hosting and baking, aka all the elements of a banger birthday party. I am so freaking happy to throw people parties because it means I get to throw a party, then go to a party! yippee!

so my friend's birthday rolled around and I knew she wanted a party because I'd done them for her before, but I wanted to make it extra special because she was turning the big 25. so I did all the regular stuff I am So Excited About: had her roommates let me into her apartment while she was out, put up balloons and homemade garlands and streamers and table decor, made her favorite cake and snack plates and cocktails, ordered catering from a restaurant she loves, got a bunch of our friends to come over to surprise her, wrote her a disgustingly heartfelt card, etc. and then because it was the big quarter century, I was like I gotta do something extra.

now. I do not like clowns. my friend loves clowns. we've gone to the circus together and she's seen me literally close my eyes and hide when the clowns are out in the audience, meanwhile she's screaming and waving at them. so obviously I hired a clown for her birthday. (btw seeing him out of clown costume made me less freaked out because now I knew that the guy under there looks like someone's uncle.)

so she showed up after work totally expecting a party because I'm too paranoid to throw a real surprise party, and obviously loved it. and then I was like btw. there's a clown.

she lost her mind. she was sooo excited. she loved the party and she loved the clown. I was like haha yes I'm getting a good grade in birthday parties and didn't think much of it because frankly I do this a lot, and it's so much fun for me that I don't consider it work. like, I love doing all that for my friends. it's not any kind of sacrifice.

two days later, she texted me that she broke up with her boyfriend.

naturally I was like omg tell me everything I hated that guy let's get coffee. so we did and she told me that for her birthday, her boyfriend of nine months 1) forgot about it and didn't get her anything, 2) got mad at her for not texting him while she was at her party, 3) got mad at her for telling him about the party because it was "passive aggressive", and 4) called her immature and stupid for being excited about a clown at her birthday.

this was all very in character for him. but she'd just come from a lovely birthday party full of her friends who love her and want to put effort into making a nice day for her, where her friend who hates clowns hired a clown just to make her happy even though the party alone would've been plenty. and suddenly this wasn't a boyfriend being kinda forgetful and lazy, it was a glaring incongruity with everyone else in her life. so she finally dumped his ass. and I was soooo freaking happy. so clowns can be good.

[impossiblepackage]

that relationship was already over, she didn’t even bring her boyfriend to her birthday party at her own apartment

[going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi]

actually it's worse than that! she knew there would be a party, but not what day. I invited her boyfriend to the party. he said no.

[aniseandspearmint]

[incognitopolls]

Where would you place your gender on a scale from 1 (man) to 9 (woman)?

1 – exclusively boy/man

2

3

4

5 – both equally, OR neither

6

7

8

9 – exclusively girl/woman

I can't place my gender on this scale

I don't know/still figuring things out

Voting ended onApr 1

Obviously gender is more complex than a one-dimensional scale, but answer as best you can. This is asking only about leaning, not intensity. Feel free to elaborate in the tags!

–

We ask your questions anonymously so you don’t have to! Submissions are open on the 1st and 15th of the month.

[catchymemes]

These circles are stationary

[jadagul]

Thanks I hate it.

[argumate]

*sigh* all power to hypnotoad.

[violetfractal]

Checked with a ruler and took screenshots - the circles are completely stationary. The effect is also not generated by the arrows, rather by the oscillating color.

The rings have 1px wide borders that oscillate out of phase with their interiors, and your eyes perceive the phase shifted borders as moving edges. It’s really neat, our optic nerves have specific hardware for edge detection and this gif fools it!

Also if I look away from the gif and stare at a spot, the gif looks really trippy in my peripheral vision. A++

[ngkiscool]

My brain hurts.

[wouldyoueatthisfood]

Would you eat this?

I would eat this

I would not eat this

I have eaten this (positive)

I have eaten this (negative)

Voting ended onApr 2

Food: Swiss chicken casserole

Ingredients: chicken, swiss cheese, Dijon mustard, stuffing mix, salt, black pepper, garlic powder, cream of chicken soup, sour cream, onion powder, thyme, butter, chicken broth

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

remember that when it comes to fanfics, two cakes is always better then one. the more the merrier!

[microwavedgrilledcheeseofficial]

i think that the Batfam all like to gaslight people about Jason’s death in different ways depending on whether their on speaking terms with him.

Reporter: Would you like to comment on Jayson Wayne’s sudden appearance?

Bruce, with a bullet wound, after trying to keep his kids still during a gala, utterly tired and incapable of discussing this: I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’m honestly offended you would joke about something so traumatic.

Reporter, flabbergasted: oh um im so sorry sir

***

[At a gala] Reporter: Sir, in your personal opinion would you say Jayson Wayne is alive?

Jason: depends who’s asking

***

Reporter: Mr. Grayson can you confirm that Jayson Wayne being alive was in fact a rumor?

Dick: What do you mean he’s right over there

***

Reporter: What are your views on Jayson Wayne’s death?

Steph: OY! JAYSON ARE YOU DEAD

Jayson: mostly

***

eventually it just becomes a local thing. depending on the section of the city, the opinions are wildly different, and very controversial.

[shadowgremlin]

My wife’s idea of decompressing after the busy holiday was to rearrange every piece of furniture in our home is this an ADHD thing or just a her thing

I’m not complaining the way she’s done it is much better than it was it’s just like how is this your idea of a relaxing weekend

[kaity--did]

Listen I don't get to decide when the drunk elf that is my executive actually does the functioning but when he does we have a SMALL WINDOW OF TIME before he finds the schnapps again and we're done

[honeysbunchesofoats]

[kaity--did]

yes this exactly

[luminouspica]

So to me, there are spoons (general energy cost) and carnival tickets (specific energy cost).

Spoons can be used pretty much anywhere.

Carnival tickets are only good for the carnival, and it’s only in town for a limited amount of time.

So like, if I get “kitchen cleaning” carnival tickets, I can’t use that to clean my bedroom, that’s not where the carnival is.

[lingonberry24]

phrase added to permanent vocabulary