Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
One Nice Bug Per Day
Today's Document
AnasAbdin
noise dept.
Xuebing Du
RMH
wallacepolsom
tumblr dot com
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Mike Driver
cherry valley forever
Cosimo Galluzzi
todays bird

PR's Tumblrdome

Origami Around
trying on a metaphor
styofa doing anything
sheepfilms
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

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@hummingbeebuzz
My grandma just called and, among other things, said “You have hips. That’s good! Men like hips!” and then she interrupted herself to say “Women like hips. People of your preferred gender like hips. I can never remember” And I was like “Thanks grandma! My preferred gender is none of them, no thanks.” and she was like “Okay, no one will comment on your hips!” very self satisfied, like “aha, I have figured it out” I think like half her grandkids are some variety of not-straight and she can’t always remember which is which but she is the epitome of like “she’s a little confused, but she’s got the spirit!”
Update: I gave it some thought and my estimate was wrong. Of the grandkids that are out, it’s 1/3, not ½
I told my grandma that I’d told my friends about what she said and that some of y’all had said you wished she was your grandma, and she said “Well, you can never have too many grandkids!” So like…consider her your honorary grandma* I guess? *if you want an honorary grandma, that is
Update on my grandma: I told her my hair was standing up, but instead of straight line it was diagonal and she said “That’s okay, you’ve never been straight!” and then laughed so hard at her own joke I thought she was going to drop the phone
Happy almost pride month! Have my confused-but-supportive grandma!
An update: my grandma just called me to ask if I knew it was pride month
Happy pride month!!
why is this post completely broken in every way imaginable
Broken notes… deactivated account… removed image….
Finally, we have them all.
In addition: OP’s name is just… gone. No “[insert username]-deactivated[insert a bunch of numbers]” as is the standard for deactivated blogs.
Just the world “deactivated.” Look upon their post, ye mighty, and despair.
It’ll be almost impossible to find this post unless it wanders across your dash.
It wandered across mine. I shall help it travel forward.
this is not a place of honor
Oh hey post of Ozymandius, good to see you again standing on your feet in a desert where no one remembers you
Happy Pride, bite a transphobe today 💙
Me: *Removes my cat from my lap to do something else.*
My cat: Father is...evil? Father is unyielding? Father is incapable of love? I am running away. I am packing my little rucksack and going out to explore the world as a lone vagabond. I can no longer thrive in this household.
The spiritual successor to Miette
Might I also add
May i add the piece from artist Verbal Vomit
Glad to see we’re all in agreement that cats talk like disparaged victorian children
I am so incredibly glad we finally moved on from "i can has". Cats are clearly smart enough for advanced sentence structure and dumb enough to draw entirely incorrect conclusions about what they're talking about.
My cat, banging the cabnet door over and over and over: bang bang bang
Me: you will not earn what you desire by banging the cabinet door.
My cat: This is a test of wills, is it not? We shall see if your ability to put up with my incessant banging outlasts my eternal lust for snackie treats. Years of conditioning have hardened me for this purpose. bang bang bang
Me: ksst!
My cat, throwing herself to the ground like she's been shot: Oh! Oh I have been assailed in my own home! Have mercy, have pity! Surely in the cruel darkness of your heart there is some mote of goodness that might stay your hand! Do not strike me, I pray you!
Me: ok
My cat, after waiting about 3 minutes: bang bang bang
Can haz snackytreat
(source)
Source
#the ancient texts
... My reblog was only six years ago!
When my mother forgets a word, she is the queen of coming up with new words. Words that would take a third National Treasure movie to fully decipher. I was talking to her yesterday, and she said this: “You know the time for los jibbities is coming up. You must be so excited!” Oh, is it time for los jibbities already? I must have missed it on my calendar. Are we celebrating something? “Of course! We should all be celebrating, shouldn’t we?” OK, so los jibbities is a happy thing. It’s not like something is giving you the heebie-jeebies, which would have been my one and only guess. “Los heebie-jeebies? Now you’re making things up...and this is my show.” You’re right. The time for los jibbities is coming up. Is this a season? “Yes, the season for love. The season for pride.” OK, los jibbities. “Yeah, sound it out.” Los…jibbities. LGBTs! “Sí, mira cuz you’re gay!” “You couldn’t just say pride season? You couldn’t just… *laughs*
HAPPY LOS JIBBITIES EVERYBODY!!!
The time for Los Jibbities has arrived!
pride month!!!
Is that a miette?
Pride for you! Pride for a thousand years!!
you COME OUT to miette? you come out to her as queer? oh! oh! pride for mother! pride for mother for One Thousand Years!!!!
“don’t take it personally” how would you like me to take it then? professionally? romantically? academically?
The beginning of the end for every digital artist
Working with kids is tough because while I do stand for kindness it's kind of asking a lot to expect I won't laugh when one of them says "bro looks like King Tuts kidney stone"
actually I lied, this was the funniest part of that doctor's appointment
just overheard somwone say "hey dude i dont see the future I've got two balls and neither is made of crystal" and im absolutely losing it
art by Curtis Lanaghan
The only downside to talking to small children like they’re normal people and treating them like normal people (as per my mom) is that as they develop into bigger children they are viscerally aware of every single moment in which they are pandered to like stupid little accessories (as per my dad, my teacher, the special ed aide, every adult in my middle school) and you end up getting a lot of phone calls from people reporting your kid for (checks notes) “undermining authority”, “disrupting the classroom environment”, “disobeying elder peers”, and “unionizing the grade eleven gym class with intent to incite a mutiny” (as per me) and you end up with a Grown Adult who will absolutely encourage and enable other people’s children to fuck the sustem
Anyhow the most empowering shit you can say to a kid in my experience has to be
“Wow that adult was being a jerk”
“That sounds really frustrating”
”Good job handling that, I would have lost my mind”
“It’s cool, I don’t expect you to remember me”
“You don’t have to hug me if you don’t want to”
“Yeah sometimes (authority figure you can’t avoid) doesn’t know what they’re talking about, it’s not your fault, just do your best”
“I don’t totally understand what you mean but I get that you’re upset, is there anything I can do?”
”Wanna go yell and break stuff with me?”
“You don’t need to be friends with that kid as long as you can still be polite”
“If an adult tells you to do something that will get you hurt, you don’t have to listen.”
“My number one goal is to keep you safe, but I don’t know everything and sometimes I’m wrong, so let me know if I make a mistake.”
“Man. Today sucked.”
“Yeah I also kinda wanna cry right now”
“Whoops, yeah, my bad”
“I don’t know the answer to that but we can probably figure it out”
one time when I was a kid my parents were arguing while we were driving somewhere and I was in the backseat so I wrote "are you going to get a divorce" on my foot and slowly extended my leg betwixt the seats
tumblr users are living in a world wholly their own which I can not help but envy
New “do it scared” just dropped