Little State Things

Everything American. Feel free to submit your own quotes and headcanons!

[hotvampireadjacent]

[dark-magician-girl-meets-world]

What will one day destroy each of the 50 US States

Alabama - Absorbed by Wyoming Alaska - Absorbed by Wyoming Arizona - Absorbed by Wyoming Arkansas - Absorbed by Wyoming California - Attempts to contain the spread of Wyoming by rigging itself with nuclear bombs Colorado - Absorbed by Wyoming Connecticut - Absorbed by Wyoming Delaware - Absorbed by Wyoming Florida - Missing, presumed absorbed by Wyoming Georgia - Absorbed by Wyoming Hawaii - Absorbed by Wyoming after the state survived California's suicide attack and continued to grow Idaho - Absorbed by Wyoming Illinois - Sacrifices itself trying to give Kentucky enough time to find the lost sword Indiana - Absorbed by Wyoming Iowa - Absorbed by Wyoming Kansas - Absorbed by Wyoming Kentucky - Attempts to wield the Wyoming Slayer alone and is not strong enough Louisiana - Absorbed by Wyoming Maine - Absorbed by Wyoming Maryland - Absorbed by Wyoming Massachusetts - Attempts to wield the Wyoming Slayer alone, and is not strong enough Michigan - Absorbed by Wyoming Minnesota - Absorbed by Wyoming Mississippi - Absorbed by Utah Missouri - Begs Utah not to go down this path, and is cut down Montana - Absorbed by Wyoming Nebraska - Absorbed by Utah Nevada - Tries to offer itself as a servant to Wyoming, telling it that together they could rule the world, but is absorbed New Hampshire - Absorbed by Utah New Jersey - Absorbed by Utah New Mexico - Gives its energy to Utah in the hopes that it will be able to stop Wyoming New York - Absorbed by Wyoming North Carolina - Attempts to wield the Wyoming Slayer alone, and is not strong enough North Dakota - Absorbed by Utah Ohio - Absorbed by Wyoming Oklahoma - Absorbed by Wyoming seconds after it finishes deciphering the runes on the handle of the Wyoming Slayer, managing only to croak out the word, "Too" Oregon - Absorbed by Wyoming Pennsylvania - Absorbed by Wyoming Rhode Island - Absorbed by Utah South Carolina - Sacrifices itself in order to get the Wyoming Slayer to Utah South Dakota - Absorbed by Utah Tennessee - Absorbed by Utah Texas - Absorbed by Utah Utah - Attempts to wield the Wyoming slayer and is burnt by its protective magics Vermont- Absorbed by Wyoming Virginia - Plunges itself into the gullet of the ever growing Wyoming to recover the sword which it ate Washington - Absorbed by Wyoming West Virginia - Absorbed by Wyoming Wisconsin - Cries, "I know what Oklahoma meant!" as it readies itself for its last stand. "Not 'too'! Together! It must be used together!" then reaches its arms into the monster's mouth, and takes hold of the sword with Virginia and with all the other states that have been eaten and lends its strength to all of them for one final attack, even as Wyoming's claws dig into its farmlands Wyoming - Stands startled for a few seconds, before beginning to crumble

[weird-goodbyes]

never give up on your dreams. Katy Perry and Justin Trudeau are dating. that's not a dream come true for either of them or any of us, but it does prove that things you cannot even fathom of happen every single day. So, why not your hopes and dreams?

[fluoriteflygon]

To be loved

Is to be changed

[sweaterkittensahoy]

you did it, you crazy sons of bitches. Great work!

[scramratz]

I'M. SO. HAPPY. FOR. YOU. CANADA.

[scramratz]

HOORAY. FOR. AUSTRALIA

[charl0ttan]

first day as a 300,000 BCE mammoth some dude hit me with a spear

[cavegirl-gobb]

spear never work, big rock always better.

[valtsv]

nothing in the world makes me more evil than just being kind of annoyed

[valtsv]

me when i’m in genuine agonising distress: i’m so sorry if i’m bothering you with my childish histrionics :/

me when i’m just in a bit of a bad mood: i hope hydrogen bombs fall on every living thing in the universe

[incorrect-states-quotes]

Missouri: People should appreciate how hard it is committing to a bit that nobody really cares about.

[incorrect-states-quotes]

hey guys im back what did i miss

[incorrect-states-quotes]

Nevada, eating breakfast: Oh, hello again. We really need to stop meeting like this.

Arizona: Maybe we would, if you would STOP BREAKING INTO MY FUCKING HOUSE.

[incorrect-states-quotes]

Utah: Oh, fiddlesticks! That really ruffles my feathers!

New Mexico: Please, just say fuck.

[incorrect-states-quotes]

Florida: Have I ever put you in an unsafe situation?

South Carolina: All the time.

Florida: Then you should be used to it.

[incorrect-states-quotes]

chat I don't know why tumblr sends reblogs to the wrong blog. like what is this. does the little program get a sick kick as it watches me realize that the two notes on a shitpost are not from any of my beloved mutuals on my main blog? does it giggle at it watches me run to delete 6 completely randomized posts, reblogged minutes apart from each other? does it get hard, because it makes my life hard ill tell you that.

[incorrect-states-quotes]

I'm just saying... New York would have never.

[passengerpigeons]

haters will see a winter enjoyer and say "why are you going outside it's cold and boring" and not even see the beauty in desolation and stillness 🙄

[seven-winged-liar]

go white boy goooo

[seven-winged-liar]

no white boy not like that

[seven-winged-liar]

white boy i've never seen anyone fuck it up like that

[incorrect-states-quotes]

Alabama: Hold on! I’m having one of those things... a headache with pictures.

Georgia: ...What the fuck?

Oklahoma: They mean they're having an idea.