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Tim: Caffeine no longer keeps me awake while I work, so instead I have Bruce or Kon periodically send me texts saying ‘we need to talk.’ Tim: It gives me the right amount of adrenaline and fear I need to keep going

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Dick: Do you think im sunset or sunrise? Jason: You're a category 5 hurricane.

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Jason: I think we should get married. Dick: What? Jason: I think we should get married. Soon. Dick: Are you pregnant?

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Bruce: What does "ily" mean? Hal: who is saying that to you lol Hal: no seriously who is saying that to you.

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Tim: I want to show you a photo from last night that really upset me Kon: Okay, but in my defense, Bart bet me 50 cents I couldn’t drink all that shampoo Tim: That’s not what I wanted to -You drank shampoo??

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Dick: Yeah I'm really into true crime podcasts lately. Jason, trying to flirt: You know I've been the primary suspect in quite a few murder cases.

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Dick: Relationships should be 50/50. For instance, Jason makes dinner and I sit on the counter looking sexy as fuck

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Jason: Uh, I think I got your lunch.

*Holds up a note that reads: ‘I am very proud of you, love, Bruce’*

Dick: Oh yeah. I didn’t think this was for me.

*Holds up a note that reads: ‘Be good. For the love of God, be good.’*

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Jason: Look, I know you think my judgment's clouded because I like Dick a little bit. Roy, holding Jason's notepad: You doodled your wedding invitation. Jason: No, that's our joint tombstone. Roy: My mistake.

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Tim: why's Jason upset? Dick: he took a "which Wayne Family member are you" quiz Tim: … and? Dick, shrugging: he got Bruce. Jason: [gunfire sounds in the distance]

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Tim: Jason, you're already my brother, but would you also do me the honor of becoming my brother in law? Dick: Did you just propose to Jason for me? Tim: Well, someone had to do it.

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Jason, on the phone: Hey, Bruce, can I borrow $5000? Bruce: Why do you need $5000? Jason: For an escape room. Bruce: What kind of escape room costs $5000?! Jason: Jason: Jail.

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Dick: Alfred and Bruce are not here, and I'm the oldest, which makes me the one in charge. Dick: Jason is the second oldest, so he's my wife. Tim: That's not how it works. Jason: Don't talk back to your father.

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Tim: How are we supposed to put a tracker the size of a penny on Dick without him noticing? Jason: Hey, Dickhead, I bet you 5 bucks that you can't swallow this penny. Dick: *takes and swallows tracker* Pay up, loser. Tim: ...