we're not kids anymore.
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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Today's Document
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@jimjams-fiddles
Little boy sticks everything in his mouth, local father tired.
(It takes basically the entire apartment building to raise this menace, the hat is a hand me down from the lady (Omera) a few apartments over, it used to be white, but it got thrown in with colors and it hasn’t been the same since, Din tore up an old coat of his and asked her to make a poncho as well, he was very confused when she freaked out because it was a Burberry)
A few ppl asked me to post more speedpaints! Here’s this evening’s warmup
was updating my Artstation and realized I hadn’t posted a process video for my pseudo-historical Hela! Enjooooy
I sometimes think that she, among all the Olympians, may be the mightiest of all. A crashing wave or thundering tempest are preferable to a broken heart.
Call me by your name. ✧*:･ﾟ✧
[Commissions] [INSTA]
I really think Rasputin lucked out, in that being remembered by history as some species of giant unkillable sex wizard is something most of us can only fruitlessly aspire to.
He didn’t luck out, he worked hard for that rep
he really didn’t though
he was just kind of a garden-variety creep, but the rumor mill did all the work for him and now he’s a banger disco song
to be fair, neither could Rasputin. Alexei very much continued to have haemophilia.
isn’t the current theory that he seemed to heal faster and have more spoons when Rasputin was around because Rasputin wouldn’t let the doctors give him aspirin, a blood thinner?
Ra Ra Rasputin Russia’s wellness scamming fiend
Fun fact: the conspirator who’d been made responsible for preparing the poison for Rasputin, Stanislaus de Lazovert, was a medical intern who’d studied under the exact same doctor who kept trying to treat Tsarevich Alexei’s hemophilia with aspirin.
Like, I feel like this should be taken into account when evaluating reports of Rasputin’s miraculous immunity to poison.
Did the guy who shot him also study under that doctor?
No, Felix Yusupov was just a useless nerd who thought he knew how murder worked because he’d read a book.
Based on the available historical evidence, the most likely sequence of events is as follows:
The conspirators attempt to kill Rasputin with poison-laced cakes, but fail; it’s unknown whether this is because de Lazovert fucked up the poison, because Rasputin – who had a well-known dislike of sweets – didn’t go in on the cakes as heavily as they expected, or just because a poisoned cake is a really stupid idea.
Seeing that the poison has failed, Yusupov gets Rasputin alone for a moment and shoots him once in the chest, causing him to fall senseless to the floor. Because he’s a useless nerd who thinks he knows how murder works because he read a book, Yusupov is unaware that a single handgun shot is very unlikely to be immediately fatal, and neglects to finish Rasputin off, instead leaving the room to confer with his fellow conspirators.
When the conspirators return to retrieve Rasputin’s body, he recovers from the shock of the initial gunshot and attacks them. Following some general panic, a third conspirator, Vladimir Purishkevich, opens up guns blazing; Purishkevich manages to miss several times in spite of being at point-blank range, but eventually strikes Rasputin in the head, killing him instantly.
The conspirators beat the shit out of Rasputin’s body just to be sure, then proceed to make a complete clownshow out of disposing of the corpse; the remainder of Rasputin’s injuries are sustained postmortem.
Pretty much everything else about Rasputin’s miraculous invincibility is invented whole cloth, much of it by Yusupov himself in order to build himself up in his own published memoirs.
(As icing on the incompetently poisoned cake, elements of Yusupov’s memoirs were later incorporated into the 1932 film Rasputin and the Empress, which led to Yusupov suing MGM Studios for libel because the film strongly implies that Rasputin was fucking Yusupov’s wife. The precedent set by that lawsuit is the reason those “similarities to any real person living or dead are coincidental” disclaimers exist.)
That last fact took me off at the knees.
the WORST trope that has become so popular in recent times is the abuse victim forgiving their abuser and it being seen as ‘an act of strength and maturity’ like no abuse victims shouldn’t have to forgive their abusers. they aren’t the arbiter of morals and they shouldn’t be used as plot points for the abuser to overcome.
this is a video of a puppy dreaming
Sword w cellphone charms
Y’all being pregnant while moving into a new house is BUCKWILD
My husband is an intelligent man, but he has gotten in his head that if I lift one box I will PERISH
Here is the problem in a nutshell
Would I love to let my husband do everything? Of course?
But this absolute GIANT of a man after TEN YEARS together still has no spatial awareness and NO AWARENESS that his a A FOOT AND A HALF taller than me. If he is left to put thing away, he will do so diligently but he PUTS EVERYTHING ON THE TOP SHELF and my TINY TREX ARMS CAN NOT MAKE THAT TRIP
I threw out my back and he’s now convinced that it’s his fault for letting me carry paper plates in the house my self and that he’s going to be a terrible father
This man has a LAW DEGREE and is a PRACTICING ATTORNEY
“You have two skeletons inside you right now that is double the amount I have. You are my sweet special Eldritch Horror” - My Husband
Thanks I think?
“It’s insane that we just made a person! I’ve never even met a baby before what do I say?!”
Not worried about diapers here folks, just first impressions
“I’m going be be a dad which is just buckwild. I have your pregnancy checklist but here is my fatherhood check list
1. I need a riding lawn mower
2. I need a white tank top
3. I need a beer, particularly an amber colored one
4. I need a book of puns
5. I need a baby back pack to carry said baby
6. I want my own diaper bag, and I want it to be STYLISH
Kait are you writing this down this is important?”
Me: a lot of people on the internet are calling you a himbo, would you like to respond?
Husband: I am often very dumb, and I do drink the respect women juice like fine wine, however I am not very strong, and I just don’t know if I can accept this title if I do not meet all the qualifications
Me: I don’t know, you lifted all those boxes on your own
Husband: this was simply DAD ENERGY
🤦♀️🤦♀️
I can not with this fool
literally marry him
I have great news my friend
marry him again
I’ve read him some of these replies and he got very upset and yelled (which if you know my husband is barely over a whisper) “I CANT MARRY YOU ANY HARDER I KNOW IVE GOOGLED IT MANY TIMES”
Y’all I’m obsessed with this idiot
so that was an arc huh?
Like everyone else, I love and hate social media
On the one hand, it has connected me to people who share my interest.
On the other hand, it’s led to ppl over sharing, filming basically every second of every day, hoping to get smth out of it (usually money and fame) forcing themselves to make up a fake image of their day to day, planning out how what they’re going to do will affect their image, like a PR agent.
This has also led to a sense of entitlement to people’s (especially celebrities) private lives. Like, i get it, you’re a fan, you think they’re cool, you wanna know more about them. But there’s a difference between asking what their favorite book is, and asking questions about smth like their sexuality.
If sm random person on the street came up to you and said “are you bi?” Would you answer? No, probably not, cause that’s none of their business.
Makes me miss the early 2000’s fandom experience.
Fancam’s were called AMVs, fan content was done almost exclusively for fun (there’s nothing wrong with commission work, dgmw, but creating things because of money, and creating things because of passion are two different things) there was no expectation of a “hustle” or “grind”.
(Also the legality of commissioning fan work, [specifically fanfiction] is a very touchy thing, people who have been in fandom since the turn of the century, sm times still shudder at the name Anne Rice)
Also, this is the biggest one for me, ppl had boundaries. Given the opportunity to ask smth of their fave actor or writer or whatever, was a serious, respectful thing. And while the increased casualness isn’t necessarily bad, it’s certainly gone way to far.
What could have been an opportunity for famous ppl to seem less like almost god like figures in sm cases, instead sm how made them seem more(?) idol like. Held to an insane standard, if not viewed as being unable to do anything wrong.
If you can, find recording of smallerish Q+A panels from before about 2010 and see how many questions you can find about stuff like shipping, or even the actors personal lives.
You probably can’t, because fan stuff and speculation was left exclusively in fan spaces.
Yes actors, and any famous person really, are going to have a different relationship with shit like public image, that’s their entire carrier, but they are still people, and should be treated as such.
(Also, the invasive questions always seem to go to male actors more often than not, smth I noticed as I was tagging)
Never has this gif been more appropriate
A vegetable is a social construct.
the BBC actually banned this part of the episode in the UK for 17 years
Like to charge reblog to cast
wait the nike logo was put on non-nike shoes??? the shoes lil nas x is advertising?? and he’s just totally chill about nike suing? LMAO
UNAUTHORIZED SATAN SHOE I’M DYING
Full offense to anyone who finds this deeply offensive, i think it’s the funniest fucking thing on every level and i’m losing my shit about it
“Unauthorized Satan Shoe” is the funniest phrase I have ever fucking seen in my entire life
The “apology” he posted on his youtube channel just links to his song again
it’s the roaring 20s no kings no gods no masters just us, Dolly Parton, the Ever Given blocking 12% of global maritime trade, and Lil Nas X in Unauthorized Satan Shoes sliding down a stripper pole to hell
“Links to his song again” is a bit of an undersell, it has a clickbaity typical youtube apology thumbnail, the first few seconds are him being all serious and apologetic, and then out of nowhere it cuts to the clip of him giving Satan the lap dance. The pinned comment is something like “sorry about the joke, here’s the real apology video” and that also links to the music video.
Me, after buying a house that's rumored to be haunted: oh no;) I hope no sexy demons come out ;) that sure would be so scary ;) if a bad bad demon comes out ;) while I'm alone and defenseless ;)
My realtor who's still in the room:
