justbarelynineties

hello lovelies! please enjoy what I have selected for you and me.

[corruptimles]

theres no spider pet in the game so this is what i gave my annabelle mii

[hellenhighwater]

Well those are allllmost done

[codebreakerblue]

question. why do you have 7 featureless grey monoliths in your driveway

[hellenhighwater]

There's eight actually but the last one is still in the garage

[jackfromthefairytale]

question. why do you have eight featureless grey monoliths

[hellenhighwater]

They're actually a really dark purple

[fishofthewoods]

question. why do you have seven featureless really dark purple monoliths in your driveway and an eighth in the garage

[hellenhighwater]

Some of them do have features though. There's holes and hinges and stuff, so I can put secrets in em

[nobodywasneverhere]

question. why do you have 8 really dark purple occasionally featureful monoliths

[hellenhighwater]

The heart wants what the heart wants

[fred-the-dinosaur]

this reads like a muppet sketch

[fred-the-dinosaur]

see? See!??!

[hellenhighwater]

You're not wrong

[hellenhighwater]

This post is less than six months old.

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[allcatsarebabies]

buster the feminist

[princessmo]

[sudra]

[sudra]

to be fucking honest.

[enki2]

[replicated]

i'm not really into blondes but this is an objectively absurd connection to make

[not100bees]

In order to be properly non-pedophilic you have to want to fuck somebody old but not with gray or white hair because that's too close to blonde which as we've established is the hair color of children. So ideally somebody old as fuck but bald. And obviously wanting to have sex with a man is misogynistic so it has to be a woman. And it can't be a white woman because that would be racist and it can't be a woman of color because that would be fetishistic, so ideally a woman with some unnatural skin color, oh let's say, purple. But it can't be an alien, because we don't know anything about alien life cycles so it could be an alien child or an alien that looks like a child. So it has to be an animal from Earth, but obviously one of human level intelligence that can communicate is otherwise that would be bestiality. So an old purple female animal that can speak English. I think the only creature you can be hot for is the Ant Queen from A Bug's Life.

[kholdseid]

[animentality]

[beemovieerotica]

[genderfluid-and-confuzled]

thought one: yummy yummy

thought two: orange juice in my tummy

[captain-price-returns]

[wifegideonnav]

“bits to use in everyday conversations”

[punkrock-bottom]

You're a faggot and chronically online

[punkrock-bottom]

I just realised this might have been meant as hate and not a daily affirmation of how cool and awesome I am.

[elokitties]

sublime sponsored ad placement

[silverrdagger]

whatever 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

[cubejello]

I did my PhD in a fish lab, and one time I was emailing a fish company, and the guy emailed me back with the signature “Best fishes,” followed by these guys

[despazito]

epic

[technofeudalism]

you may think to yourself something to the effect of “this is fucked up” or “this is sad” and yet you could leave your house right now and go buy a vape at the gas station, but these squirrels cannot. so maybe check your privilege before you start jumping to conclusions.

[aristocrating]

its 2026 i cannot handle any more fucking "author A obviously ripped off author B" discourse by people Who Have Only Seen the work of author B and admit themselves that they have no further knowledge of the literary landscape they are moving in. like.

[nudityandnerdery]

[itreallyatemyhand]