What the actual heck is my blog anymore. Um cacti are awesome, fandoms, Ace, Aro pride. Supporting other dudes Pride, animals are super cute, meme and pun warning. Dream Team. I doodle a bit. Anxiety comes over for tea sometimes. Just call me King, King Lilerz.
listen up ya’ll this post is 6 years old now and you’re still reblogging it. every month. once a month, my notifications blow up for this one video, but only until the 16th. then the notes on this vid completely stop. it’s so eerily spot on and impressive how you just all collectively know what to do. if I’m not online, people irl still remind me that it’s the 15th. thank you for six surreal years of me wondering if I completely fucking lost it. here’s to the 15th
*everything* that’s considered romantic has been conditioned by society, it’s performative, like the emotion can be genuine but romantic *gestures* are a societal construct, chocolates, flowers, rings, there’s no inherent act of romance, the purest form of what is conceptualized as “romance” can probably be boiled down to emotion + intent, and the manifestation of that combo’s gonna be different for everyone
an action evoked from a feeling of adoration and the need to express it can be constrained by what society provides, but once it’s made irrelevant the meaning becomes tailored to those experiencing it; someone giving fancy chocolates to their s.o. because it’s ‘the thing to do’ can’t measure up to someone giving the chocolates because they know their s.o. thinks the boxes are nice and really likes hazelnut fillings, same gesture, but former lacks ‘inherent’ romance because romance isn’t ‘inherent’, the later has a standard approach but it goes beyond what’s considered ‘romantic’
Hello I am a big fan of Obstinaterixatrix’ Romance Meta and I’m just gonna add to this bc it’s a good post.
I feel like what makes the difference between something being romantic and something being What Society Says Is Romance is the connection between people.
Let’s say two people arrive on my doorstep. One of them has a bouquet of expensive roses from the florist. The other one has a dead bird in a plastic bag. We all know which one is to be considered the romantic gift (hint: it’s not the corpse)
And it’s not like I don’t like flowers or am allergic or anything, I would probably be flattered. But I have no connection to roses, and like, you can give roses to more or less anyone
Dead birds are not a standard gift, for pretty obvious reasons. A person bringing me a corpse in a plastic bag had to know me well enough to know that I collect bones and process them myself, and you don’t go shopping for birds in the Dead Bird Shop around the corner, so that means this person didn’t go out with the intent of getting me something and came back with an Appropriate Gift, they probably stumbled across something and thought about me (this ‘something’ just so happens to be a dead bird, because I’m weird) And then they had to go through the process of picking this bird up and bagging it and bringing it to me, probably pretty spontaneously and without a calendar event that says Find Dead Bird For Raptor with a timeslot between three and four pm.
You can’t have Corpse I Found In a Ditch be romantic without some sort of connection here. Roses can be romantic, but it can also just, be a formula. Two plos Two Equals Romance. A shortcut for ‘I care about you‘, even though the person might …. not, actually.
If it’s someone who loves fresh flowers in their home but rarely has the money to buy large arrangements, or like OP’s example where person A gets the chocolates because they know their s.o. thinks the boxes are super cute, then we have Standard Romantic Actions actually be romantic, but they might as well not be.
This is where my squad has the joke of someone posting a picture of a dead rat to the skype chat and goes ‘Raptor I saw this and thought of you‘ and I go -exaggerated gasping noise- “how dare you blatantly flirt with me right in front of my girlfriend“ from (and also THIS JOKE that bunch of people were confused about).
Because there’s INTEREST and CONNECTION there. They’re obviosuly not actually trying to steal me from my gf, but there is a human connection and a knowledge of who I am and what I want to be associated with.
The humor then comes in from the self-awareness that this could very much be the opposite of a compliment in, like, probably most other situations ever.
So TL;DR: Things can’t be romantic without the connection between people, no matter how ‘inherit‘ people claim the gesture is. However, more or less anything can be a romantic gesture if there’s the right connection and consideration behind it. Taking out the trash can be romantic. Bringing home a dead fox can be romantic. There’s no Romance Shortcuts. You have to actually care about the other person (sorry, Writers Of Like 9 Out Of 10 Mainstream Movies), there’s no way around it.
So basically: Care about each other!! If you’re writing, write characters who care about each other!! And if you don’t know what character A could do for character B, you might wanna look into whether or not you’ve made a Cardboard Love Interest, like I feel many mainstream writers do. But that’s a whooooole ‘nother can of worms.
I’ve wondered for a long time why so many fictional romances feel forced and this is the exact reason. So many main couples in media only express their love through performative romance.
This is also why a lot of platonic fictional relationships are seen as romantic because for some reason screenwriters have a habit of making friends express their love for each other with actual thought and intent to their actions.
Very true! and probably because it’s very easy, the assumptions are already there, so there, so the markers for showing that characters are “in love” are plentiful
But like you, it also means that many characters also become more inauthentic, because instead of being themselves, they do fall into performance and scripts
I am writing an aro/ace character for my original story and I would really appreciate feedback from people who are aro and/or ace to ensure that I’m writing her in a way that is not offensive, wrong, or otherwise negative for aro/ace people.
If anyone who identifies as aro and/or ace would be willing to take a look at this character and give me advice and feedback for writing her in a way that provides good representation then that would be amazing help.
Her characterization does not rely on being aro/ace but there are still aspects of who she is as a character such as her response to touch and platonic love that I want to make as positive as possible for the community.
Please, if anyone who identifies as aro and/or ace could lend a hand I will be forever grateful. And, if you don’t identify as aro and/or ace reblogging this post and getting the word out there would be amazing as well.
Man with two daughters losses his wife (Accident, cancer maybe?). She was the love of his life and best friend and he takes it hard.
Two years later his daughter take note of a new resident in the town. A single young woman who seems to share a lot of interests. They decide she’s perfect.
Thus the movie continues with the daughters comedic attempts to get the new lady and their father to run into each other and talk to each other. Finally they tip their hand and their Dad catches them.
He sits them down and explains that he wishes they could have a mother, but he’s not ready to start dating and honestly he may never be. The daughters roll their eyes.
“We know that Dad. We weren’t trying to get you a girlfriend.”
“We were trying to get you a friend-friend.”
“You’ve pushed away everyone else since Mom died. You talk to anyone or write to them.”
“So we found someone who you never met, so you wouldn’t be haunted by the time you spent with them and Mom.”
“Someone who into the same things, so you’d have plenty to talk about.”
“And some who was probably at least a little lonely too.”
“Not everything’s about romance Dad.”
And with the pressure off and the knowledge that they do understand, the dad does become friends with the Lady. He never dates or remarries, but that’s okay because he’s okay with it and not moping. He helps the Lady when she gets married and they remain close friends.
a shocking concept: if a movie doesn’t have the time (or ability) to develop a romantic relationship to a believable level …then maybe they shouldn’t include it
You know all those movies that have a scene where the woman leaves work and goes home alone to make herself dinner? And she’s all alone with her single portion and maybe a pet? And she either watches tv or reads a book while sad music plays in the background and the audience is clearly supposed to feel bad for her and all her loneliness?
I’d love to see that scene at the *end* of a movie and without the sad, pitying music. Like, a whole movie of a woman learning to be really great at her job and making friends and being awesome, but then it ends with her at home alone, perfectly content at a job well done because her solitude is not a problem that needs to be fixed. That’s what I want.
miles mentions he has to go to the art supply store and jefferson INSISTS on taking him on the way home from school on friday so he can Learn More about his son’s hobby and the owner gives him the fucking discount and miles just dies inside
Jefferson is like “hey why’d you leave so quick” and he’s just like “haha, I just remembered I had to swing by some other places after” and Jefferson adds another post it note to his secret conspiracy board of Is Miles Spiderman
WonderCon@Home announces the winners of the 2021 Masquerade Costume Competition
Note that some winners are credited only by Tumblr accounts:
Best In Show: “Astra: Queen of the Frostborn”, a light-enhanced original design crafted by The Queen’s Armory.
Judges’ Choice: “Elphaba Act II Gown” from the Broadway musical Wicked, re-created in every detail by Shane Chandler (ShaneChandlerCostume).
Best Re-Creation: “The Ugly Stepsisters” A 2-person historical re-creation from Disney’s animated Cinderella, crafted by Devon Baker and Carrie-Lea Hoch (Komickrazi).
Best Original Design: “Cheshire Cat”, an original design inspired by Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland, designed and made by Nina London Cosplay.
Best Workmanship: “The Ur-Dragon” inspired by card art of the Magic: The Gathering game. Crafted by Kensadi Cosplay.
Best Presentation: “This Is Quarantine” a 2-person re-creation from The Nightmare Before Christmas, imitating famous paintings, crafted by Perditas Wardrobe.
Most Humorous: “The Infinity Gauntlet” An original design inspired by Avengers: Endgame, crafted by Adolfo “Ariel” Estandarte, (Ariel004).
The above winners will receive WonderCon@Home trophies, plus free attendee badges to WonderCon Anaheim 2022. Also, the Best in Show winner Astra: Queen of the Frostborn will receive $500 in cash from Frank and Son Collectible Show, of the City of Industry, California.
Honorable Mentions:
Each of the 3 judges had a costume they liked very much but did not win. Here then they are:
“Oscar François de Jarjayes from The Rose of Versailles”, a re-creation from a Japanese shōjo manga series, and crafted by Yugiri315.
“Elizabeth Swann from Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End”, re-created by Emily G. (GeekyGirlFashions).
“End Game Ironman” re-created from Avengers: Endgame, crafted by Capt Cash.
WonderCon gives a big thank-you to the contestants for all their work, to the guest judges for their time and expertise, to the Foglio’s for being our Masters of Ceremonies, and to Frank and Son Collectible Show for their generous support of the event!
Meet your 2021 WonderCon@Home Masquerade Judges:
Jennifer May Nickel
"What makes the art of Costume Design so thrilling is the opportunity to help tell a story and bring characters to life."
Jennifer May Nickel is a Costume Designer for Television and Film. For television, Jennifer’s Costume Design credits include Neflix’s Cabin with Bert Kreischer and Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis, the CW’s Containment, Fox’s What Just Happened??! with Fred Savage, Syfy's TV movie Miami Magma, the History Channel’s Legend of the Superstition Mountains, TLC’s TV movie The Secret Santa and Nickelodeon’s The Massively Mixed-Up Middle School Mystery.
Classically trained in theatre, Jennifer holds an MFA in Costume Design from Carnegie Mellon University and also studied in England at Oxford University (St. Edmund’s College: Myth and Ritual in Theatre). A proud member of the Costume Designers’ Guild Jennifer has won the Elizabeth Schrader Kimberly Costume Design Award, The Cecilia Cohen Award for Excellence in Theatre and The WCDAC Achievement Award.
Her more extensive bio can be found on IMDb.
Gigi “Fast Elk” Bannister
SFX Artist, Director, Producer, Actor, Director, Gigi "Fast Elk" Bannister (formerly Porter) has been in the film industry for over 35 years. Better known for her practical special effects and production work, Gigi is comfortable on both sides of the camera. She's appeared in over a dozen films and television shows, and is a popular guest at horror conventions, film festivals, workshops and seminars. For several years she has donated time at San Diego Comic-Cons to assist Masquerade contestants with their special effects make-up needs.
Gigi is credited as a Producer on Don Coscarelli and David Hartman's "Phantasm V: Ravager" (2016) and Steve King's "One For the Road" (2011) (Night Shift Anthology). As a character actor, she's appeared in "Bloody Bloody Bible Camp" (2011), "Carnies" (2009), in "Small Town Saturday Night" (2009) (with Chris Pine, John Hawkes, Reggie Bannister, and Perry Anzilotti), and again in Don Coscarelli's "Bubba Ho-Tep" (2002) (Bruce Campbell, Reggie Bannister and Ozzie Davis), and many more. She has produced and directed on numerous projects including dozens of live events, fundraisers and seminars, six independent feature films, and six shows for television.
More information on Gigi can be found on IMDb.
Allan Lavigne
Costumer, make-up special effects artist, sculptor, and [MJ1] painter with 40+years with credits from Lucasfilm, Sony Pictures, Disney, and more, his costume fabrication work has been exhibited around the world in museums, film premieres and numerous conventions. His Bronze Armory studio is in the San Francisco Bay Area where he creates, lectures, and teaches. His newest exhibit of screen-accurate motion picture and television costume reproductions “The Batman Armory” will be re-opening soon at the San Francisco Cartoon Museum, requested by Warner Brothers to promote the new Batman encyclopedia: Batman: The Definitive History of the Dark Knight in Comics, Films and Beyond which Allan was technical advisor for. Formerly a top winner for many years in fan costuming at many conventions, including San Diego Comic-Con, he brings with him great insight from having learned and honed his costume skills as a contestant himself.
Additional information about Allan’s work can be found at https://thebronzearmory.com
“Have you seen most of the plus-size sections out there? It’s horrifying. Whoever’s designing for plus-size doesn’t get it. The entire garment needs to be reconceived. You can’t just take a size 8 and make it larger. In my travels, I’ve been an advocate for larger women. I’ve been talking to designers, but only a half-dozen make an effort. Most say, ‘I don’t want a woman who’s a size 10 or 11 wearing my clothes.’ Well, shame on you! It’s not realistic
“You can’t just take a size 8 and make it larger.”
Praise Jesus and all the saints for him saying this because damn, most “PLUS SIZED” clothing is fugly.
I’m not surprised he said this. Ever since the first season, when they’ve had to do garments for everyday people who aren’t models, there’s always one designer (at the very least) who flips out as though they’ve never in their life considered that people who aren’t a size 0 might wear their clothes. Tim always looks at them like he wants to drown them in a lake.
I love Tim Gunn so much and this is just one of the reasons. The other is that he is asexual and has copped a lot of flack for it in the media but he isn’t ashamed of what he is/is completely happy with who is. Next to Diane Von Furstenberg, he is one of my favourite people in the fashion industry.
We do not, as a world, deserve the goodness that is Tim Gunn. My mom (a large woman in her late-fifties at the time) met him at a lecture and he spent several minutes complimenting her dress (which she made herself) and discussing why she’d had to start making ALL her own clothes (could no longer find nice, pretty things in her size) and then laughing over being the oldest people in the room (since it was a university lecture largely attended by students). My mom hasn’t felt good about her weight in years, but Tim Gunn made her proud of knowing how to dress for her shape and her taste in fabric patterns. According to my brother who witnessed all this, she was beaming.
The idea of being a villain in Pokémon is SO FUNNY like youre in this word where you have little creatures that are powered by good vibes and friendship and you can bond with them and play with them and stuff and you’re like no I think we need to establish an organized crime ring or blow up the planet or both
i spat this out and it is really dumb but for no reason at all I want to write a story from Helen of Troy’s point of view from her childhood through the war… just because….