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@kirnmons
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A collection of time travel humor text posts, not censored by me.
All of these really made me laugh, and laughter is a very good thing sometimes. All of the time, actually. Unless you're doing something that requires a still hand or silence I guess.
did you sleep well tonight? (I love you) we should do this one day (I love you) did you eat? (I love you) I brought you this because it's your favorite (I love you) have you taken your vitamins? (I love you) I made this for you (I love you) did you get home safe? (I love you) I made you some tea (I love you) how's the project that you're working on? (I love you) don't forget your umbrella (I love you) take my scarf (I love you) I'll wait with you (I love you) I'll wait for you (I love you) (I love you) (I love you)
All gays will go to hellsite
What if in hellsite but not gay
NO!
String identified: A ga g t t at t t t ga T tag g a Ag agag Acctac ! T tag g a Ag agag Acctac
Closest match: Psylliodes chrysocephala genome assembly, chromosome: 4 Common name: Cabbage Stem Flea Beetle
(image source)
Me: *Removes my cat from my lap to do something else.*
My cat: Father is...evil? Father is unyielding? Father is incapable of love? I am running away. I am packing my little rucksack and going out to explore the world as a lone vagabond. I can no longer thrive in this household.
The spiritual successor to Miette
Might I also add
May i add the piece from artist Verbal Vomit
Glad to see we’re all in agreement that cats talk like disparaged victorian children
I am so incredibly glad we finally moved on from "i can has". Cats are clearly smart enough for advanced sentence structure and dumb enough to draw entirely incorrect conclusions about what they're talking about.
My cat, banging the cabnet door over and over and over: bang bang bang
Me: you will not earn what you desire by banging the cabinet door.
My cat: This is a test of wills, is it not? We shall see if your ability to put up with my incessant banging outlasts my eternal lust for snackie treats. Years of conditioning have hardened me for this purpose. bang bang bang
Me: ksst!
My cat, throwing herself to the ground like she's been shot: Oh! Oh I have been assailed in my own home! Have mercy, have pity! Surely in the cruel darkness of your heart there is some mote of goodness that might stay your hand! Do not strike me, I pray you!
Me: ok
My cat, after waiting about 3 minutes: bang bang bang
Can haz snackytreat
(source)
Source
#the ancient texts
... My reblog was only six years ago!
When you're googling Google for your Buffy fic to figure out whether the characters would be using Google in the summer of 2000 and then the Wikipedia entry for 'Google (verb)' includes this:
LMAOOOO
"I have a problem with my trans son. Not because he's trans, but because he inhaled all our food like fucking Kirby."
its fun to remember we can use the big text if we want. bonjour motherfuckers. i'm posting loud as hell now.
hey everypony. can you direct me to the nonfiction birding books. thanks.
birds live in a beautiful world where men are htperfeminine and always laced in makeup and lashes and glitter and women are simple dressed sloppy butches. we have much to learn
graffiti discourse is so stupid why the hell would I give a shit if people spraypaint their names or do some cool paintings under a bridge
sorry didn't realize the bridge has to be plain beige concrete. that was a load bearing plain beige concrete if anyone tags it the whole bridge collapses
like literally if i didn’t want to see some weird nonsense i wouldn’t be consuming scifi
“ohh this episode is about meeting a bunch of dinosaurs who developed space travel and left earth to go live on the other side of the galaxy isn’t that crazy?! isn’t that silly?!” sure yeah maybe a little but by focusing on that but you’re missing the narrative reason for it which is to provide a starting point to explore religious authoritarianism and the production of scientific knowledge
just a spoonful of [nonsense] helps the [critical thinking about uncomfortable social and structural problems that are such a fundamental part of the background radiation of our lives that we can't see them] go down
this is the meanest thing anyone’s ever said to me. apologize to star trek: voyager season 3 episode 23 distant origin right now
I am doing whatever the opposite of locked in is .
I am locked out. I am in the parking lot. The rain is coming.
VENT POST
i would rather see the information for an event handwritten in sharpie on a paper towel than see another AI generated flyer
Saving this post to show my boss who I told the AI flier makes us look lazy and ignorant, and offered to hand draw one. She still printed tons of ai fliers and I'm tempted to make a better one just because it annoys me so much.
Fun update: event was canceled because literally nobody rsvp'd to the AI flier.
I keep getting tourism ads revolving around the 250th anniversary of the Declaration of Independence and I think there is this thought that this will be like the bicentennial in 1976 and all these businesses will profit from patriotic merch sales and tourism to historical sites and it’s so out of touch it’s insane. Nobody is proud to be an American. I’ve never been patriotic but I’m not even in the mood to be like “FUCK King George! FUCK British colonial rule.” Just reading the Declaration of Independence hurts because that shit is so ironic.