Punk As Puck

My failures are many but my successes are none

[what-even-is-thiss]

Bumble is apparently getting rid of the swipe feature and replacing it with an AI matchmaker soon. I think there’s a bad series of YA novels about why this is a bad idea.

[what-even-is-thiss]

I kinda gave up on dating apps a while ago because the queer man online dating pool in this city is small and I’m kinda ugly and transgender and the whole process is kinda dehumanizing after a while but I don’t think that an AI program criticizing my selfies and matching me with a random guy is gonna make that process feel any better.

[bluecontactlens]

"At this time! In this place!" 🪻🥚 Happy Glorious 25th of May to those who celebrate. GNU Terry Pratchett

[parkchanwoohoo]

No I think it's really great when a friend group of approximately twenty seven individuals spread out in the sidewalk as they walk so nobody has to walk behind the group. There's nothing better than when I'm trying to get home and I see the tableau of Jesus at the Last Supper gliding towards me like Jamiroquai in the Virtual Insanity music video and I have to decide who has the narrowest frame that I can shoulder-check my way past

[prokopetz]

I think it's actually essential to children's moral development to be exposed to short stories moderately beyond their reading level where a bunch of fucked up shit happens and then instead of offering a moral lesson or any sort of emotional or narrative resolution it just ends.

[iamnotswarley]

that's still one of the funniest fucking things ever to happen on tumblr

[manyblinkinglights]

#is this gayle waters-waters just gets into an argument with lestat at the town zoning board?#or is this “someone offers Gayle Waters-Waters the Dark Gift and she ends up in charge of Night Island?”#either way i think she wins but these are very different scenarios#tbh in the latter case i think that they end up as companions/lovers/that emotional relationship that only vampires have#like louis she has a fundamental void inside of her that vampires find irresistable#and like gabrielle she takes no shit and is lestat's mom#so i feel like she combines the traits of his two greatest loves

[higgsbison]

happy glorious 25th of may

[theconcealedweapon]

[pillowspace]

Nearly blocked someone for a vaguely annoying reply they made in 2017 then remembered 2017 was 9 years ago. They will live. We can change *opens their blog* nevermind they got worse. Guards

[monidoll]

aliens observing the solar system: [untranscribable telescope name]-59172 has 2 planets. It's a pair of relatively small, cold gas planets, called [untranscribable telescope name]-59172b and c. [untranscribable telescope name]-59172c was discovered only a few years ago. Systems with multiple cold gas planets are rather uncommon, so this is pretty exciting

[monidoll]

theyre probably not gonna know earth is third for some time, since mercury is a very small planet at a fairly medium distance. The moon, too, obviously.

Long before that happens though, these aliens discover [UTN]-59172d and [UTN]-59172e and determine d is uninhabitable and e is *probably* uninhabitable (because their idea of the habitable zone is slightly different and earth, already at the inner edge in our conception, happens to fall just slightly on the wrong side of the line they've drawn)

[monidoll]

artist's impression

[freysai]

imagine going to take a shit and your friend is like can i watch

[zmpl]

it’s funny how we’re getting to the point in the AI lifespan where you can feel the desperation from tech companies to have you use their AI features. instagram has moved their AI effects to the top of the menu when you’re creating a post for your story, exactly where the draw/edit button used to be. gmail is creating one-click AI-generated replies right before you open up the text box. spotify put a beta AI playlist generator on the front page that looks just like a search bar so all of their users accidentally click on it when they go to search for a song.

tech companies are shaking in their boots trying to prove to shareholders that their investment in AI is worth it, to the point where they’re tricking their users into using the AI features even for a split second in order to fudge the numbers. like awww is your little environment-destroying toy not wielding the results you hoped for? so sad!

[deep-reverie]

Dr. McCoy and the things he didn't say

[porcelain-rob0t]

the european mind cannot comprehend the 48 oz dunkin bucket

[derryderrydown]

Excuse me while I look something up...

1.4 litres????

[politenotice]

[interestingmistakes]

[mossbone]

"I have depression." - character who has been through extensive therapy.

"I feel dead inside all the time and nothing helps!" - character who does like, regular introspective thinking and is aware of the concept of mental health.

"Leave me the fuck alone I'll be fine once I get over my stupid shit." - repressed character.

"It's fine I'm just having an Empty Time. What? Yeah, empty times, you know, when everything is like bzzzzzz in your brain and you don't shower for two weeks. Why, what do you call it?" - ooooughhh now we're talkin

[ruffboi-mags]

#this post is a jillion times better than all the posts that complaina bout therapyspeak #this one SHOWS the relationship between characterization and conceptualization #of depression #as an example of that relationship in general (via @rubynye)

[teaspoonnebula]

I get in the dumps at times, and don’t open my mouth for days on end. You must not think I am sulky when I do that. Just let me alone, and I’ll soon be right.

- Sherlock Holmes in A Study in Scarlet

[thestuffedalligator]

What's the process if you're a superhero and you come out as trans

Do you tell your villains?

Do you keep it a secret so no one can connect Spider-Man with your secret identity for a while? Or do you pop a pronouns pin on your costume and the next time you web up Doctor Octopus and he goes "I'LL GET YOU NEXT TIME SPIDER-MAN" you go "Spider-Girl actually! I've been figuring out some shit"

[thestuffedalligator]

"Listen for Christ's sake we're a modern paper. Parker - Parker get in here - this is Madeline Parker, came out three months ago. Best photographer we've got. We're proud to have her on board. We at the Daily Bugle are proud to support the LGBTQ+ community bUT THIS SPIDER-GIRL IS A MENACE"

[thestuffedalligator]

Overwhelming consensus on this post is that you should come out in your superhero identity first, and then a couple weeks down the line come out in your secret identity and when people ask just go “Oh seeing Spider-Girl come out really gave me the confidence to come out myself” which is the best possible answer

[giantanteaters-deactivated20230]

hey girl are you a worm because

[giantanteaters-deactivated20230]

goddammit. i hit post too early

[giantanteaters-deactivated20230]

hey girl are you a worm because i am hooked on you

[giantanteaters-deactivated20230]

actually i guess it would be. hey girl are you a hook because i am wormed on you

[giantanteaters-deactivated20230]

no it wouldn't that's nothing

[giantanteaters-deactivated20230]

hey girl are you a fishing rod because i am hooked on you

[giantanteaters-deactivated20230]

hey girl are you a fishing rod because i'd like to reel you in

[giantanteaters-deactivated20230]

hey girl. fish

[sindri42]

[prokopetz]

I have a problem with those memes about how, if you do something and it hurts, a normal person learns not to do it again and a scientist double-checks to make sure it also hurts the second time – I feel like they're underestimating a normal person's level of intellectual curiosity. Checking whether it also hurts the second time is normal. The scientist is the person who, having confirmed that it does in fact hurt just as much the second time, begins varying the initial conditions to see whether they can get it to hurt even worse.