「BLOODY BLOODY ANDREW JACKSON SENTENCE STARTERS」
“You’re gonna have to bring some ass to get some ass”
“I’m wearing some tight, tight jeans and tonight we’re delving into some serious, serious shit”
“Why wouldn’t you ever go out with me in school”
“Take a stand against the elite”
“They don’t care anything for us”
“Oh my god, my fucking face!”
“Oh my god, my face is literally melting off into my hands right now”
“Oh fuck, the cholera finally got to her”
“I’m the only one, my family’s all dead”
“Who was it that ever said that my life really couldn’t get any duller”
“My family’s dead and I can’t see a way to carry on”
“Life sucks! And my life sucks in particular”
“When you have no one to show you what to do, how do you find your way?”
“When your country doesn’t have a place for you, how do you have your say? How do you make them pay?”
“Everyone around here’s all pissed off but no one’s taking a stand”
“There’s nothing left in this old town, pick up your life and move it around”
“Pick up your rifle and make a stand!”
“Who am I? I’m {First name} Fuckin’ {Lastname}!”
“The rain will rain down. The blood will bleed out. The sweat will sweat….uh… forth?”
“I mean, can you believe that?”
“That really hurts! Jesus!”
“Tell your wife to keep the bed warm for me”
“George Washington is not gay. You is a gay”
“YES! YES! KICK HIS ASS!”
“I remember my first love. {She/he/they} Drove a blue pickup with a dancing bear on the windshield”
“I think you might be the most beautiful {man/woman/person} I’ve ever seen”
“A wise woman once wrote that illness is not metaphor. So why do I feel sick when I look at you?”
“It’s not blood, It’s a metaphor for love. These aren’t veins just the beating of my heart”
“This fever isn’t real, It represents how I feel. My pain transformed into art”
“If you feel like you might throw up, well that’s a metaphor for how I feel when I dream of you”
“Just so you know, I’m married to another”
“We need your help. We need you to lead us”
“Are you a divine prophet?”
“I think I can take it from here”
“Sometimes you have to take the initiative”
“Sometimes you have to make your own story, sometimes you have to shoot the story teller in the neck”
“I always thought I’d never be that guy but guess what, I’m telling you: I’m so that guy”
“Life sucks! And your life’s gonna suck universally”
“I will make them all bleed”
“Okay. I’ll see you guys later”
“You’re terrible, your music sucks, you have no table manners, your paintings suck—I mean look at this! No artistic vision!”
“Listen! I’m gonna do whatever I wanna do!”
“Dream catchers are mystical!”
“You’re drunk and I’m in love!”
“I didn’t leave my first husband and risk people calling me a whore to have an even more fucked up marriage with you”
“{He/she/they} make {him/her/them} look like a pussy! I can’t imagine what {He’s/she’s/they’re} making me look like in the process!”
“Oh god {name}! Why do you always have to be such a motherfucker?”
“You seem like a very kind {man/woman/person}”
“I see in your eyes pain, compassion, a {man/woman/person} who has known no end to suffering”
“You brought me all the way here to tell me this?”
“I’m gonna fucking shit all over you guys”
“Thank you, thank you. You guys have been fuckin’ repulsive”
“{Name} said something prescient about this but {He/she/they} was kind of a dick”
“You can compromise all you want, they’re still drunk and smell like pee”
“So exciting! I never win anything!”
“Ladies and gentlemen, this one is gonna be a doozy”
“Do you have any idea what they might find out about us? About our past?”
“These past nearly four years with you have totally fucking sucked!”
“If you go back out on that stage, it’s done.”
“So what are you gonna do?”
“Why don’t you just shoot me in the head ‘cause you know I’d be better off dead”
“That’s right motherfuckers! {own name}’s back!”
“People of the world, this is our moment now!”
“I mean- did you see his jeans? They were so tight”
“I hear you talking talk about what you want, the travel the fighting, the pictures in the paper, the killing and campaigning”
“You tell me not to compromise, you tell me that you’ll change”
“You promise and you promise but I hear you talking talk about what you want and you get what you want.”
“You promise and you promise but oh- I’m so through with compromising!”
“We have no private life, you give up nothing. I give up everything.”
“I gave up everything, you give up nothing!”
“{He’s/she’s/they’re} an aristocratic blow-hard”
“Eat a dick you weasel-wearing fuck!”
“Keep talking and I’ll stab every last one of you!”
“You made your decision, {name}. Now don’t fuck it up”
“Just when everything I wanted was within my grasp, the irony is killing me”
“I make this one last vow: I’ll give my life to the people now.”
“I’ll be the man they need, the one to lead a generation.”
“I’ll listen to their voice with every choice as we transform this nation”
“I gotta be that guy. It’s time to be that guy.”
“Big change is coming now, do you feel it?”
“This is what we’ve been waiting for!”
“Yeah fuck that guy, he’s been on my dick since day one”
“I can’t see him, I’m busy vibing with the people”
“The best part is everything he says is right”
“I really think that this will work, we’re young. We’ll live forever, at least for one more night”
“My luck will hold this time it always has before”
“I also have several forms of hepatitis”
“Okay, that’s uncomfortable”
“It’s not my job to decide these things! Jesus Christ!”
“I wasn’t really listening but I like you so much”
“This isn’t fun anymore, let’s leave”
“I think this is gonna be a problem”
“Did you really think that this would work, you’re fucked. You won’t live forever.”
“Your luck won’t hold this time, it won’t be like before. It’s never gonna work.”
“That guy who did everything his way, where has he gone?”
“So tonight I’ll sing the saddest song for everyone that I’ve done wrong. And if they don’t know how to sing along well I’m sorry but the band plays on.”
“Would you like me to hold you? You must be so lonely”
“How can I tell you how deeply I’ll make them all bleed”
“Bring me {name} by any means necessary”
“The time to fuck around and talk and talk is over”
“You gotta make a decision”
“What do you say, {name}? Wanna be a hero?”
“{Name} don’t do this! I’m your friend!”
“What was it for, this country, the farms, and the blood across the prairie?”
“Great, great, good to hear. You know you’re not supposed to know your legacy before you die?”
“Wow, I kinda thought history would vindicate and call me a hero.”
“Aren’t you supposed to be dead?”
“Some people never change”
“Well I changed, I changed a whole lot. I had a whole character arch”
“Just listen if you’ve time to spare while I rehearse a ditty”
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