I have blocked all social networks and video sites save this one, and I hate how much better my mental health is right now.

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@meldanya44
I have blocked all social networks and video sites save this one, and I hate how much better my mental health is right now.
At this point I've seen like three unconnected pieces of American media set in a superficially idyllic small town with a big fuckoff lake that functions as a liminal boundary between the Known and the Unknown and in which a major character attempts suicide by drowning, and now I'm wondering if the Liminal Death Lake is just a thing American small towns have.
Or y’know the dwindling relics of an ancient inland sea that once reached from Labrador to Texas that are so deep and so cold and so still that they’re notorious amongst locals for “keeping their dead” which is to say they’re the fated and inevitable final resting place for anyone who works them or works on them and you never get the bodies back all of which were central to the theology and folklore of the locals for thousands of years before The Cross arrived and which border 2 countries and several states and have their own weird weather patterns and really I could go on at length about the apparent magic contained in those Midwestern bodies of water but I think you get my gist
I think I've literally said this on a trogblog before but, as a native of the area, the great lakes are gods.
Lake Superior is notorious for shredding even OCEAN going ships. Those she takes into the Ice Water Tomb do not return unless she permits. If she feels so inclined, she annihilates the shore with storms reaching into hurricane status. Gichigami does not tolerate the unworthy, and barely tolerates the worthy. Those who slip under her surface will rest there, in the silent cold. She is ancient.
It's the fate of all Northerners to be blanketed by the cold in death.
This post made me think of this poem, which became one of my favorites when I was growing up by the Great Lakes.
THE LAKE —— TO ——
In spring of youth it was my lot To haunt of the wide earth a spot The which I could not love the less— So lovely was the loneliness Of a wild lake, with black rock bound, And the tall pines that tower’d around.
But when the Night had thrown her pall Upon that spot, as upon all, And the mystic wind went by Murmuring in melody— Then—ah then I would awake To the terror of the lone lake.
Yet that terror was not fright, But a tremulous delight— A feeling not the jewelled mine Could teach or bribe me to define— Nor Love—although the Love were thine.
Death was in that poisonous wave, And in its gulf a fitting grave For him who thence could solace bring To his lone imagining— Whose solitary soul could make An Eden of that dim lake.
--Edgar Allan Poe, 1827
Got tagged by @gaslightgallows for six non-selfie pics from my camera roll:
From L-R:
1. A sunset view from Hanlan's Point beach, Toronto
2. An still-active Cutler Mail Chute at the Fairmont Palliser in Calgary
3. Oxtongue Rapids, Muskoka, Ontario.
4. A rose from my garden
5. The Bailiff's Cottage garden at Acton Scott, Shropshire
6. The view from Loop Head Peninsula, County Clare, Ireland
Tagging @grapefruitandgasoline @sheshallfromtimetotime @lizziethereader @a-ninja-magpie and anyone who wants to play!
Grief just really ... stains everything.
It's my spouse's birthday this week and I'm trying to have a party for him today.
But one of our friends died this spring, and it just ... makes this all harder.
Just like something isn't right about this.
'The Wild Swans' illustrated by Elenore Plaisted Abbott, 1922
There was this woman poet in 4th century China called Su Hui (蘇蕙), a child genius who had reportedly mastered Chinese characters by age 3.
At 21 years old, heartbroken by her husband who left her for another woman, she decided to encode her feelings in a structure so intricate, so beautiful, so intellectually staggering that it still baffles scholars to this day.
Came to be known as the Xuanji Tu (璇璣圖) - the "Star Gauge" or "Map of the Armillary Sphere" - it's a 29 by 29 grid of 841 characters that can produce over 4,000 different poems.
Read it forward. Read it backward. Read it horizontally, vertically, diagonally. Read it spiraling outward from the center. Read it in circles around the outer edge. Each path through the grid produces a different poem - all of them coherent, all of them beautiful, all of them rhyming, all of them expressing variations on the same themes of longing, betrayal, regret, and undying love.
The outer ring of 112 characters forms a single circular poem - believed to be both the first and longest of its kind ever written. The interior grid produces 2,848 different four-line poems of seven characters each. In addition, there are hundreds of other smaller and longer poems, depending on the reading method.
At the center a single character she left implied but unwritten: 心 (xin) - "heart." Later copyists would add it explicitly, but in Su Hui's original the meaning was even more beautiful: 4,000 poems, all orbiting the space where her heart used to be.
Take for instance the outer red grid of the Star Gauge. Starting from the top right corner and reading down, you get this seven-character quatrain:
仁智懷德聖虞唐,
貞志篤終誓穹蒼,
欽所感想妄淫荒,
心憂增慕懷慘傷。
In pinyin, it is:
Rén zhì huái dé shèng yú táng,
zhēnzhì dǔ zhōng shì qióng cāng,
qīn suǒ gǎnxiǎng wàng yín huāng,
xīn yōu zēng mù huái cǎn shāng.
Notice how it rhymes? táng / cāng / huāng / shāng
The rough translation in English is: "The benevolent and wise cherish virtue, like the sage-kings Yao and Shun, With steadfast will I swear to the heavens above, What I revere and feel - how could it be wanton or dissolute? My heart's sorrow grows, longing brings only grief."
Now read it from the bottom to the top and you get this entirely different seven-character quatrain:
傷慘懷慕增憂心,
荒淫妄想感所欽,
蒼穹誓終篤志貞,
唐虞聖德懷智仁。
The pinyin:
Shāng cǎn huái mù zēng yōu xīn,
huāngyín wàngxiǎng gǎn suǒ qīn,
cāngqióng shì zhōng dǔzhì zhēn,
táng yúshèngdé huái zhì rén.
It rhymes too: xīn and qīn, zhēn and rén
And the meaning is just as beautiful and coherent: "Grief and sorrow, longing fills my worried heart, Wanton and dissolute fantasies - is that what you revere? I swear to the heavens my constancy is true, May we embody the sage-kings' virtue, wisdom, and benevolence."
That's just 2 poems out of the over 4,000 you can construct from the Xuanji Tu!
At the very center of the grid, the 8 red characters wrapped around the central heart, she "signed" her poem with a hidden message:
詩圖璇玑,始平蘇氏。 "The poem-picture of the Armillary Sphere, by Su of Shiping."
Or reversed:
蘇氏詩圖,璇玑始平。 "Su's poem-picture - the Armillary Sphere begins in peace."
Many scholars, and even emperors, throughout Chinese history have been completely obsessed by Su Hui's puzzle.
For instance, in the Ming dynasty, a scholar named Kang Wanmin (康萬民) devoted his entire life to the poems (kangshiw.com/contents/461/2…), ending up documenting twelve different reading methods - forward, backward, diagonal, radiating, corner-to-corner, spiraling - and extracting 4,206 poems. His book on the subject ("Reading Methods for the Xuanji Tu Poems", 璇璣圖詩讀法) runs to hundreds of pages.
Empress Wu Zetian herself, the legendary woman emperor of the Tang dynasty, wrote a preface to the Xuanji Tu around 692 CE (baike.baidu.com/item/%E7%BB%87…).
Incredibly, there's even far more complexity to the Xuanji Tu than just the poems:
- The name 璇玑 (Xuanji) - Armillary Sphere - is astronomical in meaning and the way the poems can be read mirrors the way celestial bodies orbit around a fixed center. It's a model of the heavens.
- Her original work, with the characters woven on silk brocade, was in five colors (red, black, blue/green, purple, and yellow) which correspond to the Five Elements (五行) - the foundational Chinese philosophical system that explains how the universe operates. So it's also a model of the entire cosmic order according to ancient Chinese philosophy.
- It's also of course deeply mathematical with this 29 x 29 perfect square grid, with sub-squares, lines and rectangles, and a structure which allows for symmetrical reading patterns in all directions
- Last but not least, the content of the poems themselves contain multiple registers. On top of expressing her personal grief and longing for her husband, it's also filled with accusations against the concubine (Zhao Yangtai) he left her for, reflections on politics (with many references to sage-kings) and philosophical reflections.
So the Star Gauge is simultaneously:
- A love letter (expressing personal longing)
- A legal brief (arguing her case against her rival)
- A cosmological model (structured like the heavens)
- A Five Element diagram (encoding the fundamental structure of the world according to ancient Chinese philosophy)
- A mathematical construction with perfect symmetry and precision
And yet, for all this complexity, we should not forget this was all ultimately in service of the simplest human message imaginable: a 21-year-old woman asking the love of her life "come back to me".
Her husband did, eventually. According to what empress Wu Zetian herself wrote in her preface to the Xuanji Tu, when he received Su's brocade he was so "moved by its supreme beauty" that he sent away his concubine and returned to his wife. As the story goes, they lived together until old age.
The heart at the center was filled after all.
I wish I could travel through time and transcend language to hold this woman’s hand and tell her “girl, he ain’t shit”
For anyone who doesn't have a mental reference of what a literal armillary sphere is, it is this type of cool thing you have certainly seen before:
You can see the resemblance to the poem! the encircling lines around the center!
August 2026 Prompt List
It's the first of the month, which means it's time for
Prompts
My ask box is open and anon asks are on – send me a prompt (or prompts plural!) from the list below and a character/pairing from:
Good Omens (book or show, including the finale)
Dark Shadows (original series only)
The Magnus Archive/The Magnus Protocol
The Chronicles of Osreth & The Angel of the Crows (Katherine Addison books)
Babylon 5
Feel free to specify if you’d like a particular rating or have a specific plot idea you want me to attempt.
(Also, please check out my Promptable Fandoms Masterlist for other media I might consider writing for and for tropes/kinks I absolutely won’t touch.)
✨This call for prompts is open to anyone who sees it. We don’t have to be mutuals - yes you can submit multiple requests - and these are not done on commission; I’m here for the love of the game and the dopamine hits. ✨
PROMPTS
1. Sometimes they answer prayers. Just not in the way you hope.
2. Can you hear the sound of an enormous door slamming in the depths of hell?
3. Now that I've seen your face, I am haunted by the letters of your name.
4. You cannot keep faith with the faithless.
5. My longing to be with you torments me.
6. I have the everlasting tendency to ruin everything I love.
7. Every mask exacts a price.
8. I’m not in love with you but I seem to keep acting that way. If I ever figure it out I’ll let you know.
9. At night I dream of a love so heavy, it makes my spine throb.
10. All the ghosts seem to know where I am.
11. It didn't follow, because certain secrets had been dragged into the daylight, that they were no longer dangerous.
12. You are not any god's 'lost sheep' that needs finding.
13. Everybody’s always dead, and everybody’s always alive. It’s all a question of where you’re standing.
14. You are not helpless. You are not heartless. And you have time.
15. I am ready to follow you even thought I don't know where.
16. The age of some people can only be measured by the level of rot in them. And by that measure I’m ancient.
17. I don't think human beings understand how dangerous names are.
18. Living is hard, but dying would be a pity.
19. I do not crave soft things. I crave the unbearable ache of being fully known.
20. He hoped until hope became its own form of torture.
21. I'll cry about this earth in heaven too.
22. Perhaps when you're dead, nothing seems silly.
23. The trick is to look at your grief sideways.
24. Everything is divine punishment if you're delusional enough.
25. I'm just a man but I know that I'm damned.
26. No word works harder in the English language than 'ghost'.
27. Strong hearts grow tired too.
28. It doesn’t make for sanity, does it, living with the devil.
29. It's just my luck, I gotta start liking you.
30. I only stay dead til I see you again.
31. You were destined for me. Perhaps as a punishment.
32. I can bring your fears to life.
33. Where is the foundling’s father hidden?
34. I don't want to be the only one living when all of my friends are gone.
35. What is home? The light at the end of a dark road.
36. Do you think I care for you so little that betraying me would make a difference?
37. You are in my blood. I can't help it. We can't be anywhere except together.
38. I have no interest in learning what it feels like to meet my eyes.
39. Sex was not Satan's idea; it was mine.
40. I make tea for myself and leave the radio playing.
anyone else feel like butter scraped over too much bread and in serious need of a holiday, a very long holiday, from which they don't mean to return. or is it just me
forget everything anyone has ever told you on the matter the truest marker of adulthood is starting to hear the siren call of high quality kitchenware
to be clear you SHOULD buy that cast iron pan and you SHOULD buy that knife set and you SHOULD buy that fancy rice cooker and you SHOULD buy that novelty mug. high quality kitchenware is always worth it you’re literally gonna be using that almost every day
I just need a good pot, a good wok, TWO paring knives, TWO steak knives, and one Santoku style choppitychoppity.
That’s IT.
I ask for SO LITTLE.
Very helpfully, there is someone keeping track of which high-quality kitchenware has been enshittified and which hasn’t.
https://ledger.worseonpurpose.com/
Oh HELL yes.
Kyle Gordon's back
deeply deeply deeply intrigued by the wall art choices from this zillow listing i found in Quebec
huge shoutout to trees and also rain
guys its july 20th, the day humans first ever made it to the moon. its moon day. everyone wake up its moon day. the first time humankind set foot on a celestial being that wasn't earth was 55 years ago today. probably culturally significant i think. happy moon day everyone
I don't read as much fic as I used to but one "tell" for non Canadians writing us, besides the etransfer, is the units you use to describe us measuring something. I hate to tell you this but The Chart is real and it's completely subconscious. Please abide
ETA the chart (or at least a version of it):
ETA2: we do use inches/miles in poetic ways ("he was lost in thought/miles away" or "his lips were a bare inch away").
Also, the length of a dick is in inches for SURE.
going on a guilt trip do yall want anything
if you really cared about me you wouldn't have to ask