aaaaaa im back bitches

Luke ☆ He/Him ☆ 23 ☆ aaaaaaaaaaaa

[puzzled-on-main]

am i allowed to say kill all trillionaires or is that too specific of a threat

[dragongirlsweetie]

hour 1 of shift: i love helping people and making people happy yay yay yay later today i am gonna go home and have fun and eat a tasty meal and work on my projects and

hour 6: if youu go to the store and buy groceriers you are a piece of shit

hour 8: if i wad 1 apples tall i could live off of one apple for a week... oh but it would rot away... no.... i hate the rot i hate the apple

[brainstatic]

I want a Santa movie where he’s actually Saint Nicholaos of Myra. Three kids run away from home and find a portal to the Council Of Nicaea in 325 AD. Then the kids watch him debate the promulgation of canon law. In the end they return home and tell their parents that presents aren’t important so long as Pentecost is counted 50 days after Easter on the Roman solar calendar and not the Jewish lunar calendar.

[brainstatic]

And the kids tell their parents the whole story and the dad is like “those kids and their imaginations.” But then he sees a piece of paper in the dog’s mouth and goes “whatcha got there boy? Is that…orders from the Holy See that the schismatic bishop Meletius is to remain in Lycopolis and keep his episcopal title but the ecclesiastics ordained by him must again receive the laying of hands? But…how?” And then he gazes off to the sky and you hear a light jingling of bells and then a voice over goes “Ho ho ho! The baptisms performed by the Paulian heretics are invalid! Merry Christmas!”

[margalcazo]

Apollo "footrests are essential office furniture" Justice vs Klavier "anything can be a desk if you put your mind to it" Gavin

[synibread]

this is everything to me ever

[theoneofwhomisblue]

Thirsty wunk

[blossposs]

[snapcracklepop-myjoints]

just had a disconcerting thought

[snapcracklepop-myjoints]

how do u pronounce georg of spiders fame

gay-org

george

other

Voting ended onJun 22

[vintage-tigre]

[grumsal]

Alternate Universe Where Bones are Called Something Slightly Different

[breaks leg] Argh, my boings!

[neosatsuma]

[neosatsuma]

[rain-droplet]

who turned them german mid tag ?

[dastardlywlw]

how do you know they were transformed midday?

[outofcontextanimash]

[monkeywiki]

what did they do

[nastyukulele]

What they had to do.

[yo-its-matt]

[silky-selkie]

[bumbelbee]

likes charge reblogs cast

[proteusolm]

Crazy to think that seagulls existed before french fries.

[bluebandedagate-reblogs]

Medieval seagull struggling to fly away with an entire purloined potatoe

[thesituation]

open tumblr, see something that pisses me off, write a snarky post, delete it, write a slightly more earnest post, edit it for 5 minutes, delete it, close tumblr

[fxa]

[transfemme-shelterdog]

For those who haven't seen Breaking Bad, this is 100% canon, as someone who has seen this show several times.

The only thing that isn't accurate is the frame with all the money. Walt doesn't pay for it in cash but rather with a cheque for a bank account in Belize as it's way too much work and way too suspicious to pay $50k in $100 bills.

But yeah, this actually happened.

[soberqueerinthewild]

Shel Silverstein predicting ChatGPT in 1981

[ace-sailor-uranus]

tbh i think this poem is better served with the *whole* picture, don't you?

[vamptits]

anytime I'm worried about becoming a boring medium ugly man with testosterone I just think of all the boring medium ugly men my awesome beautiful online mutuals want to fuck and I feel better. and a little scared cause I know the other stuff they want to do to those guys