Growing Up Is For Grown-Ups

It would seem you have tumbled onto my tumblr. 90s child.

[memeuplift]

[brucebocchi]

[cass-burger]

[arthistorycq]

I normally try to keep this blog strictly about the glory that is art history, but I can’t avoid sharing a good architecture pun!

(Yes, I love puns)

[freedoritos-deactivated20160716]

Heh heh

[detectivehole]

emperor kuzco was clearly gay

[detectivehole]

hes 19, with unlimited power, and he ain’t got a gf. the only time we see him interact with any women his own age is when he’s rejecting like 7 of them rapid fire. he pretends to date pacha in a gag that lasts like 10 solid minutes. listen to me god damnit

[qqueenofhades]

Okay, but just in case anyone is coming to tumblr dot com for my hot takes on 20+ year old kids' movies: Kuzco super WAS gay (or at least coded as such) and of course, I didn't get it until I watched it as a gay grownup.

He is played obviously camp and dramatic, for a start, and there is the aforementioned "hate your hair/not likely/yikes yikes yikes/let me guess you have a great personality" summary dismissal of all his potential brides. Then he spends dinner asking Yzma about Kronk ("so he seems nice? He's what, in his late twenties?") and otherwise being slightly obsessed with him.

Then there is the whole Adventure of Doom with Pacha, him being ever huffy about the Kiss of Life, and then the restaurant gag where Kuzco takes to playing Pacha's fake wife and dressing up in ladies' clothing with great gusto (reinforced by the waitress' "bless you for coming out in public" remark when Pacha says they're on their honeymoon). Then when he is finally de-llamafied, we don't see him paired off with the obligatory girl from the lineup earlier, as might otherwise be expected in a Disney movie. Instead he is still single, but goes to found family it up with Pacha, Chica, Kronk, etc, which dare we remark is a very queer trope.

In short, I have no idea how a Disney movie with no white people (all the characters are Indigenous/people of color), a gay king, cross-dressing jokes, and the most offbeat plot of all time actually ever got made (can you imagine the Family Friendly Mouse doing that today? Let us also talk about Kronk because he is a brilliant deconstruction of both toxic masculinity and the musclebound henchman stereotype.) Other than that this was the Chaos Hour of animated movies in the late 90s/early 2000s, and yes.

So yes. There you have it. I will not be taking criticism at this time.

[flavinbagel]

In response to the question “How did a movie like this get made at all much less by fucking Disney?” there was a recent Vulture article that outlines the whole shit show of a history behind this film according to everyone (writers, directors, VAs, Stings) involved. The gist of the story is that they fucked up making a whole, true-to-form Disney musical that never came to see the light of day SO BADLY that Disney switched directors, locked the writer’s room, and didn’t review a single script until weeks after the film was in theaters.

Please, read this article if you have some time. This story is wild, and involves directors being pitted against each other Bake-Off style and a shockingly intimate documentary created by the wife of Sting who, himself was heartbroken by the decimation of the songs he wrote for the film including cutting a fantastic Yzma villain song sung by Eartha Kitt that is SO DAMN GOOD but would not ever have fit the more nailed-down Yzma we would eventually come to know and love. It’s so catchy though, I’m doubling up on calls to action but please listen now:

[theterriblethingabouttulio]

holy shit read the article. it’s worth it and completely batshit

[kat-witha-k]

This is fucking insane

[brightlotusmoon]

[mod2amaryllis]

I've never adequately appreciated the batshit brilliance of this joke, I've taken it for granted

[worldheritageposts-official]

World Heritage Post

[memeuplift]

[devourallusurvey]

You ever think about many peices of media have zero women and thats just perfectly normal but if a peice of media has an all female cast people get... like that? Women should be allowed to kill over this btw

[loveshoplifter]

same but it's black people

[devourallusurvey]

That's right

[natsumipocket]

Blue collection by Daniel Romero

[knownqueerbaiter]

typed and deleted a post but know it is my burden to have the correct opinion all the time

[feastofsnakes]

hey sorry I snapped at you, I've just had a really hard day and [remembers focusing on myself is selfish] maybe it's your fault for provoking me?

[tigeristired]

i think 'I trust you with my life but not your own' as a trope is one of the ones that can always fuck me up no matter what

[marvellouslymadmim]

"I trust you with my life because you are good and kind and noble--I know you will not hesitate to do everything in your power to save me.

I do not trust you with your own life because you are good and kind and noble--I know you would not hesitate to sacrifice yourself to save me."

THAT is where it's at!!!!!

[twitblr]

[throwbackblr]

[xanaxfarts]

[ruinedchildhood]

[ozempicofficial]

[thisishowyoumakemovies]

That comment is spot on AND sciatica stretches are legit. The best treatment for sciatica is get stretchy.

Signed: Willem Defoe fan with sciatica

[wethekeegsta]

For anyone who doesn’t know, Sciatica is pain due to compression of the sciatic nerve, which runs from your buttocks down the back of your leg. The reason this stretch is helpful is because the sciatic nerve, after leaving your spinal cord, immediately runs just underneath - and may get compressed by - the Piriformis muscle deep in your buttcheek, which helps you externally rotate your hip. (If the muscle is super tight, your toes on that side might actually point further out when you lie down compared to the toes on your other foot, jsyk).

If the above stretch ain’t compatible with you for reasons like having bitch ass knees, here are some alternative and amazing stretches for the muscle in order of easiest to hardest (but imo least to most helpful) to perform:

However, just keep in mind that none of these stretches will help you if you have a herniated disc, which compresses the nerve roots that protrude from the spine itself! For that you’ll for sure need some different medical intervention.

Have fun!

[electricswamp]

[aurpiment]

“It’s easy to assume”: someone’s misconception is about to be amiably corrected

“It’s tempting to assume”: someone’s assumption is about to be criticized

“It’s comforting to assume”: someone’s assumption is going to be read for filth

[georgiansuggestion]

take your carriage very slowly by your rival’s home, that she might see your latest hat

[luckyartisanllama]

Eat your heart Catherine, you toad-eating hag.

[lezcatnoir]

Elizabeth, you must surely be aware that I am unable to view the roads from my apartments due to the vastness of my estate…

[alsuper2]

Oh, please do forgive my mistake, Catherine, I had only assumed you could see from that ostentatiously high pedestal atop of which you have placed yourself

[77777777777777777777222-deactiv]

[gluten-free-pussy]