PinkFairyPrincess

she/her 18 I will combust if I can’t bring up Regulus Black into every conversation ao3: PrettyFairyPrincess

[vesnuszki]

i wanted to say something about cliff and ilya rating each others nudes

first of all they absolutely rate each others nudes, sometimes they send them not even with the intention to send the nudes so someone else, just for the hell of it, just to have the other saying hell yeah brother looking good, just to boost self esteem

second of all while the idea of them 10/10ing each picture is funny and appealing to me, i had a vision in which i saw the most meticulous earnest constructive criticism in order to help the other achieve absolute perfection

-(a dick pic, full light) move your hand down a bit, will make it seem bigger and maybe turn down the light a bit, give it an aura of mystery

-(navel to mid thigh, a giant hickey right where the pubes line starts) damn roz, who did this to you? (ilya says you should see the other guy. marley doesn’t catch on)

-(mirror selfie, full frontal) marley don’t you have a mirror outside of the bathroom? the toilet in the background is a bit of a buzzkill

-(hands down pants, dick fully erect) love the vibe but there is a giant hole in your boxers, maybe change those

-(bedroom vanity mirror, sweaty abs) damn roz someone in the bed with you? the lightnings dope but don’t send this to anyone with someone with an ass like that in the background

[pinkprincessxx]

This is so hot, but it’s got me thinking-

Cliff in the cuck chair. He finds out their relationship, after something Ilya sent him has just a bit too much Shane and he works it out.

Not actively participating (tho I like that too), I just want him seeing the nudes they’re sending each other, Ilya running them by him to see if his look good, and them rating the ones Shane sends to him, Ilya sharing them with pride, and cliff using them later to get off

In the hotel room while hollanov are have phone sex, in the year before Ilya moves to Ottawa, listening. Ilya asking cliff if Shane’s can come, if he’s been good enough for them

I want him watching and knowing how Shane looks and sounds while in public, making jokes to other people that they don’t understand

I don’t know, but I’ve been looking for something like this and I can find nothing. I just think it’s so funny the way they have zero boundaries with one another, and this is just another thing they share

[pinkprincessxx]

What I loved about Leviticus, was that the actors weren’t afraid to look ugly.

Now, both of the actors are extremely beautiful people, to deny that would be stupid, but I always think of the scene where Ryan is getting the curse, and just how tortured he looked. He didn’t look beautiful in pain, he looked like someone was setting a demon on him (shocking, ik). It shouldn’t have been crazy, because at the end of the day all he did was accurately portray pain, literally his job.

But I think in the world we live in, where every actor looks plastic or perfect, and always pretty, it was just so refreshing to see someone actually look real and ugly and tortured.

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

every time I see someone act rude, entitled or disrespectful towards a fanfic writer and/or the fics, I think the writer should be legally allowed to kill them

[mybloodstream-caffeine]

Every time I think of Vegas Shane stepping into that elevator, hole puffy as hell, smelling of second hand smoke, mouth still tasting like gross vodka, no hot Dom walking him out, no goodbye kissie, no pat on the head for a job well done, and he's ALREADY composing his see you next season :) text, I curl up and start convulsing out of excruciating embarrassment at his raw earnestness,,, SHANE SHANE GOD PLEASE YOU CANT LIVE LIFE WITH YOUR HEART ON YOUR SLEEVE LIKE THIS!!!! THEY'LL KILL YOU FOR IT SHANE!!! OH MY GOD!!!!

[hystericalend]

Obsessed with how leviticus held true to the Australian Teenage Boy bc what do you mean it's just gonna look like the next dickhead you're into. And the next one after that. If I'm gonna live with this thing then.. I dont want it to look like some other dickhead. I want it to look like you. And it's the most romantic line in the entire movie

[pinkprincessxx]

Loved it soo much, but it genuinely took me out, lmao

All I could think of was how they sounded, acted, and even looked like the dickheads I went to school with

[luna-azzurra]

The two wolves inside every writer: "this is genuinely the best thing i have ever written. i am gifted. i am changed. this paragraph alone justifies my entire existence on this planet." and then five minutes later, same paragraph: "who wrote this. who allowed this. this reads like a golden retriever trying to describe grief. i need to lie down and reconsider everything." both wolves are always wrong. the paragraph is fine. you need a snack.

[dynasharkiiz]

i believe people have pointed this out already but i love how "the mill" is a physical manifestation of ryan and naim's queerness/their love.

it's established in the beginning dialogue between them:

n: "been there before? the mill?" have you ever indulged in your queerness like this?

r: "no, first time...you?" not until you.

n: "yeah, first time." me too.

r: "don't tell anyone about it--the mill." no one can know about us.

and thinking about it, it's the only place where they can unapologetically and comfortable be themselves--not just as two boys in love but as people.

they don't just share loving kisses in there, naim shares more about his father's passing and his mom's absurd obsession with God and her faith.

and i think it makes the naim & entity-ryan scene all the more important. at the very beginning when ryan and naim shared their first kiss at the mill, naim shoved him off at the sight of their reflection, afraid of what he was doing. at the end, he has to come face to face with that desire, with his queerness in the place where it all started. the place that represents him and ryan's love, relationship, their secret--and overcome that fear.

because it was that fear that brought the entity into their lives in the first place when he outed ryan. it was that fear that didn't let him fully embrace ryan when he first leaned in to kiss him and more. it was that fear that led izzie to lure ryan and naim to get beat up. it was that fear that killed hunter. it was that fear that drove ryan and naim apart at the ice rink and again when they fought.

and even though naim is scared fucking shitless, confused as fuck, and missing ryan so god damn much, he sets the mill on fire. he burns the place their secrecy belonged to, essentially burning his shame and guilt with it, making a decision to not live with fear anymore. to not let his mother get to him, to forget the way the pastor glared at him during service, the confusing emotions that led him to harm ryan and hunter by outing them.

and instead of shrinking back in fear and screaming when entity-ryan chokes him in the mill (before he gets a hold of the lighter again & starts the fire), he touches its cheek. accepting his desire--no, his love for ryan. accepting himself. and we see the entity pause, and it's at this moment that he takes advantage to end things once and for all.

he will no longer run from this. he will not let his mother's choices in faith and fear control who he is.

so he closes the window where entity-ryan tries to get to him one last time, going home instead, where his mother's car is parked in their driveway.

given his epiphany and everything he's been through, when he hears his mom's last attempts at justifying the ritual and her intentions, plus "we all need fear in our lives," naim decides he's done.

the mill is gone. naim finally stands tall. and after talking about how much he wanted to leave the shitty town his mother had dragged him to, he finally does.

and the saddest part, at least about that moment, is that it's reminiscent of the conversation naim & ryan had had in the mill at the beginning.

"there's nothing you like about this place?"

"nothing."

the family that kept him there, his mother, now meant nothing to naim. and the boy, ryan, the one thing he did like about the place, in his mind, was gone. nowhere to be found.

which makes the ending all the more perfect.

ryan isn't gone. and they now see each other in a new light.

unafraid and proud. choosing to ignore the entity, because their love matters above all.

[pinkprincessxx]

On top of this, setting the mill on fire was almost like he was willing to sacrifice their queerness for their safety?

By burning the mill (agreeing not to see each other anymore, attempting to revoke their love) he’s taking the steps that even if it hurts them to not have the mill anymore ( again their love) he was willing to give that up if it could grant them protection from the demon and each other.

I don’t think I worded this well lmao but the burning of the mill meant SO MUCH.

[me-and-michael]

Leviticus really said yes life will be harder because I choose to be with you but I choose to be with you despite it all

[doctornerdington]

Loved that the film lets love and fear exist together, without easy resolution.

[pinkprincessxx]

I hate the rhetoric pushed by old people, that young people are lazy, and are making up shit like mental illness.

Bro I WANT so desperately to feel well. I want to have the desire/the ability to leave the house and see my friends and work and study. If wishing made things true, I would have conquered the earth by now.

But no, leaving my bed and going outside, while rewarding, means I have to take hours to recover enough to simply shower and eat. I so desperately wish I didn’t have this stupid problem. I wish my mind and body didn’t hate me.

I wake up tired. I’m never not. The feeling of constantly fighting my nervous system to do anything is tiring in and of itself.

So thank you David and Karen, for making me feel so much better about myself

[pinkprincessxx]

The choking fear of people seeing things that I want them to see? Like why am I terrified of the way that people perceive me, even if it’s EXACTLY how I want them to.

Like I hate the idea of ANYONE seeing my tumblr, even if I FULLY stand ten toes down on everything I say on here, and would absolutely argue with anyone who wanted to disagree with me

But the idea of even my bestest friend seeing this place? Kill me.

Like my ex wanted to be mutals on tumblr and I didn’t even want her to see my name on here, even tho I think it’s cute and I like it? IT DOESNT MATTER I’m so aware but I hated the idea of her knowing???

Bro idk but public perception is cruel and wrong lmao

[shanesbug]

ilya biting the stretch marks on shane’s ass. send tweet.

[ilyannarozanova]

"I'm a Shane Hollander apologist" well actually he has nothing to apologize for AND!! even if he did I would stand behind my man 100% ten toes down no matter what

[i-will-write]

man if I gotta write bad fics, it should at least be easy! But it’s not! It is also hard to write this bad fic

[nightmarist]

A COMINT !!

[pinkprincessxx]

The rush you get 🤤🤤

I don’t need to do drugs i KNOW the best feeling in the world

[chubby-cry-baby]

ilya jokingly complains to yuna and david about shane doing something (“david!!! help!! shane is pinching me!!!”) and they reply with a version of “sorry no returns” “you married him” “he’s yours now” and he loooooves to hear that!!!

[shaneposting]

can we recentre shane and ilya laughing and being silly and having fun and playing together

[ceruleanheaven]

[looking at people younger than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at people older than me] you have your whole life ahead of you [looking at myself] its over