The Best Stuff

[cavern-of-remembrance-deactivat]

nintendo is taking down the 3ds and wii u eshops next year

and they had this lovingly made totally not taunting message to leave about their virtual console legacy they’re destroying

(that they’ve, fun fact, taken down from their site now :])

[cavern-of-remembrance-deactivat]

this pisses me off so much because nintendo is AWARE we want their legacy of games put on their best selling system (literally, outside of the combined sales of every nintendo DS, lite, DSi, and XL, and the GB and GBC’s combined sales, the switch is at the top)

and yet they still do not care. it’s not about them not having this content either because 1 the wii u vc and 3ds vc. exist. and 2, even for stuff that isnt on the virtual console yet, we’ve been given internal proof from previous big nintendo leaks (namely the gigaleak) that nintendo does not mess around when it comes to keeping backups of their older content. its not a lack of money either, nintendo is literally one of the richest companies in japan. it’s just. a lack of caring

[cavern-of-remembrance-deactivat]

last thing im gonna say about this is that the 3DS and Wii U both have excellent, actively updated guides for softmodding them to run homebrew. the Wii and DSi do as well!

on top of that the emulation general wiki is an amazing resource for emulators for pretty much every generation of game system, including emulators for non game systems like arcade hardware, PCs, and mobile phones, along with emulators on game systems! so check the wiki out if you’re interested!

[susurrationofthewind]

And if/when you do softmod your 3DS, gosh, wouldn’t it be nice if there was a site that safely and reliably hosted games for it, where you could even download them directly to your 3DS through a QR code?

[lesbiansitara-moved-deactivated]

I wish that ao3 had an option to filter warnings (and tbh certain authors) out like I will never ever want to read it and just seeing it puts me off so much that often I end up closing my browser because that content upsets me so much lmao

[darcylindbergh]

There is a way to do this but I can’t recall how to do it. it’s something you type into the box for “other filters” or something, I don’t remember. who knows?? It’s not a great option, and I don’t know if you can sort out authors that way, but it’s better than nothing if someone can reblog this with how to do it!

[fordeductions-blog]

Alrighty friends! It takes some specificity, but you can do this. Let me show you how!

So I started with going to the Sherlock (TV) section of Ao3. On the right we find this lovely section! ((I know I’m going over things you already probably know, but I figure this post may go to new Ao3 users, so bear with me.))

Underneath this, I chose sort by Kudos, because that’s a quick way to find most popular fics, for the sake of this demonstration. 

With those filters on, we end up with this being our first two results: 

As you can see, we have Nature and Nurture by earlgreytea68, and The Internet Is Not Just For Porn by cyerus. So what if I am utterly sick of seeing earlgreytea68 on my list? Let’s pretend I’ve read all their fics, or that I just don’t like her, or whatever. I want this author out. I go to this section on the right: 

In “Search within results” I type earlgreytea68 into the bar, with a minus sign in front. This gives me the following page, upon hitting the sort and filter button:

There goes earlgreytea68! But now I’ve decided that Crack is just not my thing, I’m sick of that, too, for heaven’s sake, I want something reasonable in my gay slash fanfiction about detectives that solve crimes about glowing dogs and irish megalomaniacs. Heaven forbid this get ridiculous.

Well, then I add this to my search:

Which gets rid of everything with that tag. My results are now:

Performance in a Leading Role is now my first result!

You can do this as many times as you want; the biggest problem I have is trying to filter out multi-worded tags. For example, “Secret Relationship” is hard to filter. Better to go with authors you dislike or with words like “DubCon”. 

I hope this helps! Also remember that googling site:archiveofourown.org and then adding search terms will mean google searches Ao3 for you, and sometimes that works far better. 

Good luck!

[darcylindbergh]

An excellent in-depth guide! Thank you!!

[eyesofmedusa]

omg changed my whole ao3 rarepair game

[stucky-ficrecs]

An excellent guide to filtering on AO3!

You can filter out phrases by enclosing them in quotes. For example, if ABO and Hydra Trash Party are not your things, try:

-“alpha/beta/omega dynamics” -”hydra trash party”

[possibly-an-obsession]

I have more advice!

Say, you’re in your random fandom- I went with the Marvel Cinematic Universe, since I’ve been reading Iron Man stuff recently. Tony Stark is awesome.

But anyway, you’re on the page, and you see that there are 174,774 works! That is way too many for a casual afternoon’s browsing.

And you see that the first one is Peter Parker/Tony Stark and that is not your jam. It doesn’t work for you, or it squicks you, whatever. Wouldn’t life be easier if you could browse without seeing that pairing (or whatever pairing you don’t like)? You can!

First, click on that pairing tag(You may want to open this in another tab, actually.):

and it’ll take you to the page for that pairing tag. Click this button:

and then look at the address bar! The actual page is unimportant. Copy the numbers located here:

and go back to the original search page! Down on the side, in the same place you can get rid of other tags, type -relationship_ids:”the number you just copied”

Then hit ‘sort and filter’ annnd… magic!

The fics with that pairing are gone! You can also do multiple pairings, get rid of any tags you don’t like, and sort it by date or length or kudos, or whatever.

Enjoy.

[irenkaferalkitty]

I’d just like to add that these sorts of search modifiers ALSO WORK IN GOOGLE AND MOST RESEARCH DATABASES. The more you know.

[itsmajel]

Just a quick reminder that AO3 uses Lucene as a search and index engine.

That means you can pretty much use all the Lucene Query Syntax in the “Seach within result” field.

I don’t think AO3 indexes the whole fic for searching but definitely it’s meta data. Combined with Lucenes awesome query syntax you can do pretty much every search you heart desires.

Addtional Lucene Query Syntax that has not been mentioned yet and you might find useful:

Wildcard Searches

You can use wildcard searches within single terms. For a single character wildcard search use the “?” symbol. For a multiple character wildcard search use the “*” symbol.

AND/OR

Lucene allows you to combin terms through logic operators. You’re looking for fics that are either “reunion” or “enemies to lovers”?

Just put in >“reunion” OR “enemies to lovers”< into the field

and you end up with all the stories that are either or but not both.

But wait, now you’re looking for fics that are both “reunion” and “enemies to lovers” at the same time? Now worries Lucene got you covered.

Just change it into >“"reunion” AND “enemies to lovers”“<

and you’ll get all the fics that mention both “reunion” and “enemies to lovers” somewhere in their meta data (note: it’s not just tags. It’s also title, summary …)

Boosting

You can also boost specific terms when doing a multi term search.

You can use the “^” Operator followed by a number to boost a specific term.

Say you’re interested in fics that are either “first kiss” or “bed sharing” but you’re much more interested in “bed sharing” fics and feel they are more relevant.

You can use the search >“first kiss” “bed sharing”^5<

to manipulate the order of your results in a matter that the score of every fic that contains beg sharing is multiplied by 5. Therefore all fics containing that term are given priority and shown at the top of the list.

You can also combine all of the above, target specifc fields (that’s what you did with the “relationsship_id:xxx”) and many more things.

For more info about the Lucene query syntax check out Apache’s Lucene Query doc.

[thefriendlypigeon]

^ sharing this because we all love fanfics and @itsmajel is a freaking nerd 👌

[purlturtle]

Some of these searches can also be achieved via the “exclude” function in the search bar - this offers you for each section (ratings, category, relationships, tags, etc.) the most commonly used metadata for these fics, to check or uncheck (and thus exclude or not) as you please!

[guerrillatech]

[whisperofthewaves]

this leaves out the most crucial tip you'll ever need:

-site:pinterest.*

excludes the entirety of pinterest's evil domainverse from image search

[soratayuya]

Reblogging for the Pinterest addition

[heroofthreefaces]

I think you mean “reblog for the pinterest subtraction”

[nerdygaymormon]

these and more can be found at the Instagram account teabag.cartoon

[tsunderees]

uhhh sorry for the wordiness i guess but i want to get awareness up on a chronic behavior that isn’t very well known!! and i haven’t seen anything for bfrb week on my dash at all so

i’m by no means an expert on BFRBs but feel free to send me any questions or stories! (or correct me if i got something wrong)

[girl-debord]

if you are in high school and you follow me idc if you learn nothing else from me, but learn this: do not join the fucking military. they will promise you all sorts of things in exchange for joining their muder-system for a few years. do not listen to them. you won’t find a sense of purpose, you won’t find an adventure, you might not even get the money they promise you for college. if you survive, you’ll come back with blood on your hands, feeling just as aimless as before except knowing you’re a killer. the government will drop you like hot potatoes the second you are not useful to them, and you will be on your own with nothing but some ptsd and a more intimate understanding of the phrase “blood for oil.”

[prof-grace-aspen]

So…

You’re 19, according to your blog anyway. Are you in the military?

I actually DID join the military. I served 4 years in the Navy.

I found a sense of purpose and adventure and confidence in myself and it wasn’t hard at all to get the money promised for college. I’m using it right now.

It wasn’t hard to survive because I wasn’t in the infantry, getting shot at all the time. There are a lot of branches of the military and lots of jobs. I was on the flight deck of an aircraft carrier.

I don’t really feel like I have blood on my hands. I don’t consider myself a killer. But again, I wasn’t in the infantry and I wasn’t shooting people in the face. There are many, many jobs in the military that don’t involve shooting people in the face.

I don’t feel aimless; being in the military actually gave me a very strong sense of purpose and illuminated what I wanted to do with myself once I got out. I passionately went back to college and I’m one semester away from earning my degree.

Can all of the negative things above happen to someone who joins the military? Yes. Absolutely. The military can destroy you emotionally and physically. Is that a guaranteed outcome? No.

[girl-debord]

I fear you misunderstood my post. I’m not saying that joining the military might make you feel like a killer and that that would be bad, I’m saying that if you participate in the military you are participating institutionally in the killing of innocents, and that you should feel guilty. The fact that you don’t feel that way after being a part of an organization that engages in such large-scale violence doesn’t prove that you’re not fucked up, in fact, it shows me the opposite.

Luckily I didn’t fall for anything the recruiters threw at me in high school, but I’m writing this as someone with friends and classmates at various stages of joining the military and getting shipped out.

Like I’ve said, what military may or may not do to your mental state after you sign up is bad, but it’s nothing compared to what the military does and will continue to do to kids and families that never volunteered to be a part of this. 77% of those killed in the Iraq War were civilians (many of those were children). Other recent wars have been similar. That is the handiwork of the military, from the highest general to the lowest teenager in combat gear, and every pencil-pusher in between. The only difference between you and those infantrymen is not that you do not have blood on your hands, it is that you did not have to see the faces of the people you helped to kill.

[turing-tested]

im so fucking distraught someone came into my wendys and asked they could use their own cup and i said yes and he filled a ziplock bag full of coke! i hate working fast food!!! what the fuck!!

[twinklingtorchlight]

EXPL*CIT CONTENT GONE FOR GOOD

I’m going to go ahead and say, I don’t even know if I can say the name because the automation will flag me. Please, please, PLEASE, if you make or reblog THAT type of fanart, videos, or gifs, for any of the categories in the tags or below, let me know where you are going to go. Message me. Comment. I don’t care. I probably follow you. If you will have a website, Twitter, or some form of way to see this content ever again, please tell me.

Destiel

Doctor Who

Stucky

My hero academia

Cockles

Johnlock

Hankcon

Hannigram

Thulk/Thruce

J2

Steven universe

Undertale

Sabriel

Sastiel

Teen wolf

Septiplier

Crankiplier

Spacedogs

Achievement Hunter

Veddie

Rooster Teeth

[annabellehectorworldofweird]

[ratguzzler-deactivated20181213]

*from computer speakers* vsauce, *from suddenly behind you* michael here

[deathwarlock]

*from inside your head* what if you were defenseless

[taurusqueer-deactivated20200607]

[joematar]

I’m sorry people aren’t sharing the actual end of this which is even better:

[writeradamanteve]

Ariana Grande is a queen. She is. 

Fight me on this if you think otherwise.

[peterlosingwendy13-deactivated2]

I would like to report a murder

[blackgirlsonlyparty-deactivated]

WHERE IS MY WEAVE HOLY SHIT

[thenotoriousscuttlecliff]

“If Shakespeare and Michelangelo were alive today, and if they decided to collaborate on a comic, Shakespeare would write the script and Michelangelo would draw it. How could anybody say that this wouldn’t be as worthwhile an artform as anything on earth?”

RIP Stan Lee (December 28, 1922 – November 12, 2018)

[adulthoodisokay]

oh my god this vid from a /ck/ thread is incredible

[emiria]

my kinda diet

[megasonger]

[sussura]

What

[doodlemeimpressed]

[loutrem]

This video looks like how it feels when youre crying in your bed at 3 am out of anxiety and youre trying to cheer yourself up by watching videos but all it does is make your brain feel more erratic.

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

My wife and I were were talking the other day and, I don’t remember what we were even talking about, but the idea came up that we would need an oreo for. I joked about getting one from my secret stash. This is where she made her mistake. She said “oh right, like you could have an Oreo stash without me knowing about it.”

I’m sorry?

That’s a challenge.

Oreos aquired.

I’m going to hide them in a super simple place at first

But be sure to follow this post while I chronicle all the ways and places I hide them and also how I plan on taunting her with cookies while she can’t find the package

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

She is out of the house for a moment so it’s time to enjoy a few cookies

And find a new hiding spot

Hehehe

They up there

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

Normally I’m a Oreos with milk kinda guy, but I’ll take coffee if coffee is available

Now to hide them right under her nose

She never looks under the TV for anything. Tonight when we are watching Halloween Wars I’ll have a big dopey grin on my face

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

Time to up the stakes. It was fun having em here and hiding them around her while she didn’t know what was happening. Bit now it’s time for her to be in on the game she is playing

Four cookies packed in her lunch. Game on

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

I’ve been cleaning house today and feeling like I’ve done a pretty good job. Time to reward myself with some delicious Oreos

Aaaaand put them where she would never find them in a million years

:)

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

Got up early this morning and helped pack everyone’s lunch. Pulling a damn Oprah over here

You get some cookies! You get some cookies! Everyone gets cookies!

Then a devious idea struck me…

I put the remaining Oreos in a baggie to hide by themselves. Now to “hide” the package where it will probably be found…

And pin the actual stash to the inside of the closet wall

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

[kittyinhighheels]

If you two weren’t already married I’d beg you to marry her because you two are obviously perfect for each other and I love this post with all my heart

[masterofthenightscape]

This guy’s dopey grin at his success at hiding oreos is exactly what I’m here for

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

You like that eh? Well you are going to love today’s installment

Look at that. So sad. So few Oreos left

Guess I’ll just pin em right to the middle of the wall in the middle of the living room. She’ll never find em there

Oh, guess I should put this back up

Bwa ha ha ha! You guys! You guys don’t understand! I was planning on doing this and when I got home and looked at it I was like “aww, it’s too thin. They won’t fit.” I even TOLD my wife this and how I was disappointed that I wouldn’t be able to hide them back there.

But then I looked again. They dooooo

Thank you all so much for the love. I knew y'all would like this, but I had no idea you would like it THIS MUCH. People calling us “goals” and stuff… Man…. It’s kinda hard to take in ya know? Anyways: if this post gets Over 9000™ before I get off work today I will pick up Halloween Oreos on my way home and this will not stop

And, as promised, a dopey grin

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

Twasnt easy to get the stupid video to load. But I got it and I recommend giving it a watch here: http://keepcalmandcarrieunderwood.tumblr.com/post/179330357103

She is so happy that the Oreo Saga continues. Just look at how happy she is

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

Came home to find this

But she never looked inside the blue chair

Good stuff, but it’s time for some cookies

Gotta have some while I think about where these guys are going next

Hmmmmm

Got it.

[bokunoherokomikuko]

Imagine your otp

[vivaciousarcanist]

youtube said fuck work

[posts-to-remember]

Tuesday, October 16th. 10:00pm. Remember the day.

[loafed-beans-deactivated2020082]

[fedkaczynski]

What’s funny is that this actually happened. 

[allamericankindofguy-actual]

I’m unfamiliar with this story please elaborate

[fedkaczynski]

Finnish soldier gets separated from the rest of his unit but he’s the only one carrying the emergency amphetamines for the unit, takes too many and goes on a one man rampage for like 2 weeks straight giving the opposing Soviet soldiers nightmares for decades. Oh and he did it all on skis. 

[ethereal-insight-deactivated201]

Did he survive?

[loafed-beans-deactivated2020082]

Yes, during his methed up 2-3 week rampage he got injured by a land mine, travelled 400km on skis, and only ate pine buds and a Siberian Jay that he caught which he ate raw. When he made it back to Finnish lines he was taken to a hospital where it was found his heart rate was nearly 200 beats per minute and his weight had dropped to 43kg (94.7lbs).

[doctor-roman]

His name was Aimo Koivunen if you want to look him up

[misteryada]

Those are the eyes of a man who has seen god and laughed

[libraford]

“Oh I love roses! I try growing them myself, but they never get very far.”

“Would you like to know the secret to healthy rose bushes,” I asked, knowing that she would not like the answer. 

“Do tell!”

Grin. “Blood.”

The customer paused, waiting for me to say that I was kidding. But I wasn’t so it never came. She became nervous. 

And before I could explain that blood meal is a common soil fixer and fertilizer, she put her hands up, spun around and said-

“Bye.”

You want to know the secrets to a beautiful garden? You better be prepared for some weird shit. 

[traegorn]

Well someone felt like being the ominous witch in the small, mysterious shop today.

.

…also, tomatoes like blood too.

[libraford]

My interest in plants extends beyond ‘oh look a pretty flower’ and straight into ‘plants are fucking metal.’ 

Evidently, you’re supposed to plant garlic in the same places as your roses because the garlic will repel a rose-specific aphid.

So what I’m saying is that between the romantic symbolism of the rose, the bloodmeal in the soil, and the fresh garlic all over the place-

You could really set yourself up for an encounter with some VERY pissed vampires. 

[sans--seraph]

Roses really love banana skins, too. Just… stick one in there before you plant a rose bush or spronkle around one that’s already in  the ground. They’ll adore you. 

[libraford]

Mmm… blood banana. 

[fattyatomicmutant]

I made tiny ass Home Depot Petunias blossom like magic that they’re nearly overtaking the trellises.

How did I accomplish this?

Once a week I bury a small amount of leftover meat in the soil.

[libraford]

My morning glories loved the crap out of the charred chicken bones I gave them. They’re already an enthusiastic plant, but the blooms I had this year were extraordinary. 

[dranikitten]

@thebibliosphere Well, if you ever get your allergies under some semblance of more control and want to get on Demon Rose’s good side, I guess

[thebibliosphere]

They also like fish too.

[fuckingrecipes]

For anyone curious about why plants love blood and meat and bone and ash; 

When looking at fertilizer, you’ll often see 3 numbers on the package somewhere, arranged like 10-10-10 or 30-5-10. 

This is called the NPK ratio. It stands for N - Nitrogen, P - Phosphorus - K - Potassium. 

The numbers are ‘Ratio of Nutrients’ - the percentage the product contains by volume, of each element. 

NPK, and then some other elements classified as ‘micronutrients’ are what plants need to grow. High Nitrogen encourages fast plant growth, High Potassium encourages big blooms, and Phosphorus helps the plants breathe and store energy for later.  Calcium and Magnesum are two of the larger micronutrient needs. Calcium is used to make sturdy cell walls, and Magnesium is is required for photosynthesis. 

Blood and Bone and Ash all have fairly slow releases of their nutrients, so it’ll benefit the plant for a long time afterward. Meat is a bit faster release, but generally won’t burn the plants with too much nitrogen. When bone is ground up, it’s  4-12-0 - Plus a bunch of Calcium. 

When blood breaks down it offers a lot of Nitrogen. 12-0-0 - 

Wood ash breaks down into primarily Potassium. 0-0-5 

Meat aka Fish Emulsion (Aka several fish that have been put through a blender) is really high in nitrogen and is fast-release - 5-2-2

Dried Seaweed (like the kind you use for sushi) is loaded with other micro-nutrients that plants love. 

Bat guano aka poop is 10-3-1 - Very good for rapid, lush growth. 

Pretty much every greenhouse, especially if they’re leaning toward organic, will have blood and meat and bone and ash (and seaweed and animal poop lol) as a staple fertilizers. 

Conclusion: Plants are goth af. A vampire who has excess blood, bodies, and bats just laying around will have a VERY lush and healthy garden.