₊˚⊹♡| 25 | She/Her | AroAce |♡⊹˚₊
I am but a simple fanfiction writer who creates reader-insert stories to escape the harsh world of reality. Recently, I have started to branch out into publishing original pieces!
✰ #cirque des debuts ✰ #circus of beginnings ✰
Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/purpleplums
About Me || Writing Masterlist || Match-up Requesting Information
If you enjoy my work or would just like to support me, consider checking out my Ko-fi. Any little bit helps. ♡
Personal Projects/Stories:
Cirque des Débuts Dev Logs || Star-crossed Spirits Dev Logs || Melancholia Dev Logs || Project M
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► I write: Headcanons (bulleted and fairly short personal ideas I have about a character), Scenarios (example being how character a reacts to __ and what they’d do), and Drabbles (one-shots based on a prompt; length may vary).
► I am willing to write: fluff, angst, romantic and platonic relationships, sensitive topics/mental illnesses (such as depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideations since I deal them personally), certain AUs (such as soulmate AUs, college AUs, etc.), suggestive content, smut, injuries, violence, polyamorous relationships.
► I will not write: Aged-up characters (in a sexual context), pedophilia, incest, anything harmful to any community, pregnancy or childbirth, A/B/O, non-con or dub-con, cheating, extreme horror or gore, anything yandere (only if the character is, canonically, not a yandere). I also don’t enjoy writing Reader characters that are non-human/supernatural creatures, especially if it doesn’t make sense in the original context of the series.
➥ Disclaimer: This is a non-profit blog. Any art used to make the banners for my headcanons, scenarios, or drabbles are not mine unless stated otherwise and are official pieces of art that belong to their respective owners. However, please do not use the banners I make for your own blog/website/etc. and instead make your own.
➥ Regarding AI + Reposting: I do not condone or consent to my writing being used to train AI, and I do not support the use of AI for writing or artwork, so please do not use my works for that. I also do not want my stories posted to any other site. If you see my works on anything other than Tumblr or Ao3, then that is not me and the reposter disregarded my rules. If this happens, please reach out to me and/or report them. Thank you.
➥ Regarding Translations: If you want to translate my fanfictions into another language, just DM me! I would like to see any previous fanfictions you have translated, as well, just to ensure that you are legitimate in your request. As for what sites the translated version can be posted on, I am only comfortable with the translated versions of my works being posted on Ao3 and then linked back to the original version. Thank you!
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✧ Rules:
► Please do not interact with any of my NSFW works if you are a minor; I do not mind if you interact with my SFW pieces, though! However, I would rather you not interact with me directly since I am an adult and that would be weird.
► Do not interact if you are homophobic, transphobic, racist, etc.! My blog is a safe space for individuals in the LGBTQ+ community and POC; I do not want people like you around me or my blog. Stay away.
► Only a max of five characters per request, please!
► Only one fandom per ask! Please do not request a character from show A and a character from show B in the same ask; in that case, send them in separate asks.
► If I feel uncomfortable with the request, feel as though I cannot do the idea justice/write the character in character, or feel uninspired with the ask, I have the right to not write it. Please do not be upset if I do not write your suggestion. I may also go out of the order in which I received the requests; it all depends on how much it inspires me.
► I am willing to write smut but, if I do not feel comfortable with the request, I will not write it. If you have any questions about what I will and won’t do, just ask... I don’t bite! UPDATE: I have a post now with some examples of what I will not write for; this will probably be updated in the future.
► Reader will be gender-neutral unless their gender or assigned sex at birth play a significant role in the request (Ex. “How would ___ react to their s/o who is on their period?”). I want my works to be able to be enjoyed by everyone regardless of their gender identity/sex assigned at birth/pronouns, etc. For this same reason, I will not write a Reader that has a specific eye color/skin tone/body type/etc. unless it has a direct impact on the scenario requested (Ex. “___ comforting their chubby s/o.”).
► Reader will always be human unless specified to be another species. Keep in mind you’ll have a lower likelihood of your request being written if the Reader is not human.
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✧ Fandoms I will Write For:
► Genshin Impact
⌦ Preference towards writing: Xiao, Arataki Itto, and Neuvillette.
⌦ I will not write anything romantic or NSFW for: Klee, Diona, Qiqi, Sayu, Dori, Nahida, or Yaoyao (no child-model characters).
⌦ I will not write anything NSFW for: Barbara, Bennett, Chongyun, Collei, Fischl, Freminet, Gaming, Mika, Noelle, Razor, or Xiangling, Xingqiu, or Xinyan (since I’m pretty sure they’re all teenagers).
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► Honkai Star Rail
⌦ Preference towards writing: Jing Yuan, Boothill, and Gallagher.
⌦ I will not write anything romantic or NSFW for: Hook, Clara, or Bailu (they’re children).
⌦ I will not write anything NSFW for: Pela, Lynx, Huohuo, Sushang, Yanqing, Silver Wolf, or Misha (since they seem to be either teenagers or just look really young).
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► Twisted Wonderland
⌦ Preference towards writing: Azul Ashengrotto, Floyd Leech, and Jade Leech.
⌦ I will not write anything romantic or NSFW for: Grim, Ortho Shroud, Lilia Vanrouge (if the Reader is a student), the Dwarves, or any teachers/staff members (unless it is with a Reader who is an adult and not a student. Ashton Vargas is the only exception since I will not write anything romantic/NSFW for him at all, regardless of the Reader’s age; platonic is fine, though).
⌦ I will only write NSFW for: Trey Clover, Cater Diamond, Leona Kingscholar, Vil Schoenheit, Rook Hunt, Idia Shroud, and Malleus Draconia (since they’re all 18+, everyone else is a no for NSFW); I will also write NSFW for Lilia Vanrouge and the teachers/staff, but only if the Reader is an adult.
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► FNaF: Security Breach
⌦ Preference towards writing: Sunrise and Moondrop.
⌦ I will not write anything romantic or NSFW for: Gregory, DJ Music Man.
⌦ I will not write for: Vanessa, Vanny, or Burntrap/Glitchtrap.
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► Undertale
⌦ Preference towards writing: Sans and Papyrus.
⌦ I will not write anything romantic or NSFW for: Frisk, Chara, or Asriel (they’re literal children).
⌦ AUs I’m willing to write for: Underfell, Underswap, Swapfell/Fellswap, Horrortale.
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► Homicipher/文字化化
⌦ Preference towards writing: Mr. Crawling.
⌦ I will not write anything NSFW for: Mr. Chopped.
⌦ I will not write for: Any of the secondary characters (Mr. Big Face, Mr. Wheelchair, Ms. Blue Clad, The Bride, etc.) at the moment. This may change in the future but for right now, I would like to focus on getting comfortable writing for the main seven first.
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► Pressure (Roblox)
⌦ Preference towards writing: Sebastian Solace and P.AI.nter.
⌦ I will not write anything NSFW for: Any of the other entities as-is, since I’m pretty sure they would not pass the Harkness Test.
⌦ I will not write for: Mr. Shade.
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► The Freak Circus
⌦ Preference towards writing: Pierrot, Harlequin, and Columbina.
⌦ I will not write anything romantic for: The Boss (his design is very cool, and I like his vibe, but I view him as a father-figure rather than a love interest).
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► Dead by Daylight
⌦ Preference towards writing: Huntress, Singularity, and Hillbilly.
⌦ I will not currently write for: Any of the survivors (I want to focus on the killers for the time being), Dredge and Unknown (I don’t think they would pass the Harkness Test), or any of the licensed killers (Freddy, Myers, Leatherface, Pig, etc.). I will write for Ghostface/Danny, however.
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✧ My Tags:
#✨ . About Plum - The About Me Tag! Anything I Relate to or Information Regarding Myself Will be Found Here.
#✏️ . Plum Draws - Tag for my Drawn Artwork that is Usually Reblogged from my Main Blog.
#🌸 . Plum Writes - My Writing Tag! Anything I Write Will be Found Here.
#🌺 . Plum Thirsts - Spicy, Not-SFW Content; Minors Do Not Interact.
#🌷 . Writing Help/Resources - For Resources, Prompts, and General Advice.
#🌻 . Plum Reblogs - Any Content That I Reblog. This can include Self-Reblogs as well.
#💌 . Anon - Requests/Asks from Anonymous Individuals.
#🌿 . Plum Speaks - For Posts Where I Speak or Talk About Things Other Than the Writing Request or Prompt.
#🍀 . Plum Updates - Updates for my Fanfictions or Life, as well as my Progress on Requests.
#🍃 . Game Development - Any posts related to the development of personal/original visual novel projects (Cirque des Débuts, Melancholia, and Star-Crossed Spirits).
# 🌲. Project M - Any posts relating to the development of my CYOA monster romance/horror story.
#🩷 . Original Characters - Any posts that relate to original characters of mine.
#🎉 . 400 Followers Match-Maker Event! - Includes All Match-ups Sent in by Others to Celebrate Hitting 400 Followers!
✔️ = SFW Content
🔞 = NSFW Content, Minors Do Not Interact
⚠️ = Potentially Triggering Subject Matter (Bullying, Discussions of Poor Mental Health, SA, etc.)
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☆Check out the game's itch.io page here to follow the story's development!☆
Development Logs: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5]
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⌦ Cirque des Débuts X The Freak Circus
➥ Headcanons/Scenario, Crossover, Platonic (♡), ✔️
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⌦ How They React When You Fix Something on Their Person
➥ "Headcanons"/Scenario, Fluff, GN!Reader, Romantic or Platonic (♥/♡), ✔️
⌦ How The Characters Act When They're Feeling Jealous or Possessive (Feat. Jealousy Scale/Ranking)
➥ "Headcanons"/Scenario, Fluff, GN!Reader, Romantic or Platonic (♥/♡), ✔️
⌦ What Do They Do If You're Experiencing a Dissociative Episode (i.e., How They Aid an MC/Reader with Muteness Caused by Trauma)
➥ "Headcanons"/Scenario, Fluff (Hurt/Comfort), GN!Reader, Romantic or Platonic (♥/♡), ⚠️
⊱ The Silence Suffocates ⊰ || Cirque des Débuts X Reader
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Character(s): Adelina, Benedict, Clementine, Dartois, and Elliott (Cirque des Débuts)
Reader Type: Human (Gender-Neutral Pronouns)
Warning(s): Implied Complex Past Trauma (Regarding the Reader; Nothing is Specified), Selective Mutism linked to Trauma, Discussion/Depiction of Dissociative Symptoms (Derealization and Depersonalization), Depiction of Tonic Immobility as a Trauma Response, Brief Exploration of Characters wanting to Devour the Reader (Specifically Clementine's Section; this is NOT meant to be a Metaphor for SA).
Genre: "Headcanons"/Scenario, Angst (Hurt/Comfort), Romantic or Platonic Relationship.
Word Count: ~6,600 words.
Prompt: “29. Muteness Caused by Trauma” – Prompt List... Was Deleted, Unfortunately
Author’s Note: I desperately needed to write some more content for my characters because my thesis (at the time I first started working on this) was legitimately pushing me off the deep end, so to balance that out, I allowed myself to be self-indulgent for a wee bit because these idiots make me incredibly happy haha! I found a really great list of angst prompts, so I just started writing because stress levels were high (which they unfortunately still are, just for different reasons now), and I needed some more comfort in my life at the time. After all, who better to give it to me than my beloved OCs, who have been on my mind nearly 24/7 since I started seriously developing their story? I will be upfront and say that I am not diagnosed with any dissociative disorders, but I do experience mild dissociative symptoms when under stress and because of my depression, so I apologize in advance if my depiction of intense/severe dissociation isn't entirely accurate! I tried to base it on what I know from working with trauma survivors and the research I've done on the effects of trauma, as well as my own experiences as someone whose trauma response was always tonic immobility. Check out the game's itch.io page or read more about the characters on my Ao3!
→ The artwork for the banners was created by and belongs to me, as do my OCs. Please do not use them anywhere else — thank you!
→ If you enjoyed my work, please reblog it if you can! Exposure on Tumblr is based on reblogging content rather than liking it, so your support would be much appreciated! ♡
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🎩: You were supposed to be getting ready for the upcoming performance, and yet, you were not. Your skin felt… wrong stretched across your body. There were so many things happening at once, flooding your mind and making everything around you feel incredibly fake, like the world you were in wasn’t real. The lights around you were too bright — the sound of people talking was muffled in your ears, almost as if cotton had been shoved inside. Everything was blurred as the performers moved around you in a hurry, making your head feel heavy. You felt like you were a ghost, standing motionless while the world continued to turn without you. You didn't even notice that you were being watched from across the way, a pair of sharp eyes drawn to you like a moth to a flame. It was almost like a sixth sense how Adelina could simply tell there was something wrong with you before you even became aware of what was happening with your own body. The circus was crowded and busy, as it typically was on opening night, with everyone rushing about in preparation for the big show. However, even from across the bustling backstage where all performers were getting ready for their upcoming acts, the sound of your heartbeat was almost deafeningly loud in her ears. They find their body stilling, just so they could listen to the way your heart pulsed in your chest, the noise skipping now and again in an erratic rhythm. Adelina was familiar with the racing hearts of humans. It was something that could be caused by a variety of things – from fear, to anxiety, to even joy – and she had no clue what could be causing yours to beat so strangely. They can’t help but secretly wish they understood emotions as well as Benedict did.
🎩: After a moment of brief contemplation, they make their way over to you with practiced steps, dodging their fellow performers with ease after so many years of experience, with their gloved hands clasped rigidly behind their back. It didn’t take long for her to reach you. Here she was, standing right in front of you, and yet, your gaze almost feels like you're staring through her rather than directly at her. Beneath her mask, her brows furrow, and she calls your name in a strangely soft tone, one that is barely audible above the noise around you. When you don't react, they do it again, their voice becoming firmer each time they try to get your attention. As more time passes, she realizes that her initial concern was very much valid, especially considering you didn’t seem to be mentally present at the moment. A quick glance at the clock shows she has about twenty minutes before her routine, and she hopes that will be enough time to aid you through whatever you are currently experiencing. Despite not being one for physical contact, she reaches out and takes your hand in hers carefully, dragging you out of the chaos and somewhere far away from everyone else while being incredibly mindful of her touch. Even though her gloves kept her claws concealed, she didn’t want to run the risk of harming you. However, when you don’t react to her hand pressed against yours, it only causes the pit in her stomach to deepen.
🎩: As soon as the two of you are somewhere private, far away from all the overwhelming noises and smells and lights, Adelina releases her hold on your hand after helping you sit down. Immediately, she begins to ask you question after question to determine her course of action… and you don’t reply to a single one. That wasn’t like you, not at all – at least not anymore. You two were close now; you didn’t have to watch your tongue or worry about things the same way you once did, but you weren’t talking. You weren’t even looking at her, that unfamiliar, distant, and hazy look in your eyes causing her intestines to tie together in knots. She quickly glances at the clock again, realizing she doesn’t have much time left before her act. Adelina needed to be there, and she couldn’t be late – couldn’t disappoint everyone, couldn’t have this moment be a blemish on her perfect record… but she also couldn’t leave you here alone. They would never be able to forgive themself if something happened to you while you weren’t mentally present. So, after accepting the fact that she wouldn’t be there to perform on opening night (for the first time in her entire life), she pulls up a chair to sit next to you, silently hoping that everyone would be able to manage without her and wouldn't be too upset at her uncharacteristic absence. She doesn’t want to touch you in this state, and she doesn’t want to ask since you’re clearly too overwhelmed to answer. Instead, her hands focus on picking off any stray piece of lint or string from your clothing, just something simple, in the hopes it would let you know she was here for you without being too overstimulating.
🎩: Hours had passed by the time you came to, your mind finally able to once again comprehend what was happening around you. Your heartbeat was steady, and your brain was no longer blanketed in a thick fog. Your body felt like it was yours again, with the only uncomfortable thing being your backside, most likely due to how you had been sitting relatively motionless for an unknown amount of time. When you turn and see Adelina sitting next to you in silence, her hands clasped tightly in front of her with her eyes focused intently on you, you cannot help but wonder why she is here. They were supposed to perform, weren't they? When they inform you of their choice to stay by your side rather than participate in their act, you cannot help but feel a wave of guilt wash over you. However, she's quick to inform you that it was her choice – how she wanted to stay with you, and that she wouldn't have felt right leaving you in the care of another while in such a vulnerable state. Adelina raises a single hand in an effort to pause your rambling. Then, carefully and slowly, giving you plenty of time to tell her to stop, she cups your cheeks in her palms. Even through her gloves, you can feel that her hands are cold. They try not to tremble when your warmth bleeds into the fabric of their gloves, and they try not to pull away when you lean into their touch, seeking their comfort. Despite it being something so foreign to her, she wants to try to connect with you on a human level, and if all you need is some reassurance and a gentle touch, then she can at least do that much for you.
“Ah, welcome back. I am glad to see you have returned to me… No, no – you do not need to explain anything, my dear, I was just… Never mind me, are you doing alright? Is there anything I can fetch for you? The performances are over for the night, and I do not have any more plans for the evening… Oh, please do not fret – it was my choice to stay by your side, and I wouldn’t have felt comfortable leaving you in anyone else’s care… If there is anything I can improve on to aid you through moments like these in the future, please let me know. I want to do my best by you, even if I do not fully understand it.”
🤡: Everything had been going perfectly fine that day, Benedict thought. His performance the evening before was well-received, and he had spent the entire night cooking up some of your favorite foods and snacks as thanks for all of your help around the circus these past few months. While your relationship certainly hadn’t started on the best foot (which was putting it lightly), you were still kind to them, and they couldn’t be more thankful to you for that. Now that the sun had risen over the horizon and you were most likely awake, they immediately set off to your designated car in the circus’s train layout. It wasn’t a very far journey for them, quite the opposite, really. It was probably for the better that the trip was short, though, considering the precarious tower of Tupperware they were balancing in their hands. When they arrive at your car, they knock on the door once, twice… thrice in a rhythmic fashion, and then they wait patiently for you to appear in front of them. After standing there for five or so minutes, he tries again, but once more, nothing happens. There's no sound of you moving around inside, but also no sign that you had stepped out for the day, either. So, with a strange feeling swirling in his stomach, one that continues growing with each passing second, he finally bites the bullet. He quickly fiddles with the lock on your door before slipping inside without a sound (he'd apologize for overstepping boundaries later). When he sees you just lying in bed, staring up at the ceiling, he’s relieved you're alright. He calls out your name cheerily, greeting you with a good morning, and setting the food he brought over on the table. However, you don't respond… You don't even acknowledge his presence.
🤡: You had a dream last night of something you didn’t want to remember, a memory that you thought you had long since buried. When you opened your eyes that morning, it still felt as though you were sleeping – like you were just existing within a dream. Your body simultaneously felt like there was lead in your chest, weighing you down, while your limbs were filled with helium as they tried to lift you into the sky. Your flesh and bones didn’t even feel like yours anymore, and time had been dragging on for what seemed like hours… When did you even wake up? How long had it been? You see movement in your peripheral vision, and for a moment, you think you are hallucinating, but no, that most certainly was Benedict, carrying a ridiculous amount of food in his arms. He says something to you, but your brain can't comprehend his words. You couldn't move, you couldn't speak — you could only lie there, staring over at him with a blank expression. He seemed to catch on quickly that something was not right, coming over to you and staring down at your form while you stared back, whispering your name under his breath as he reached out in an attempt to touch you. However, he stops himself, quickly pulling his hand back. Would touching you make whatever was happening worse? They didn't want to risk it, to risk harming you or escalating the situation, so they instead pulled up a chair and sat down next to you. With their hands folded in their lap, they made small talk with you, discussing nothing in particular.
🤡: He tells you about the food he had made for you that morning, how last night's show went well (his performance got more applause than usual!), and how he missed you — he told you that he was glad to be able to be in your presence again after that felt like eons. Benedict doesn't expect you to say anything back, even though they wish you would. They keep talking even as they stand up and prepare a plate of one of the dishes they had brought over, the scent of your favorite meal billowing through the space. He comes back over to sit beside you again, placing the food on the table by your bedside. For a moment, he stops speaking, watching the way your fingers twitch ever so slightly. Slowly, hesitantly, he reaches forward, wrapping his index finger around yours. With a feather-light touch, he rubs his thumb across your knuckles, resuming his monologue about whatever possibly came to his mind while he did everything he could to not show how worried and anxious he was. That distant and foggy look in your eyes made their stomach churn, flashbacks of glazed-over eyes and ice-cold skin flashing in their mind. Immediately, he pushes those memories to the far corners of his brain with a shake of his head, instead focusing on the warmth your hand emitted against his palm and the heartbeat he could feel when his thumb periodically pressed against your wrist (he was just making sure).
🤡: You weren't sure how long it had been when the haze that had filled your mind like smog throughout a city, heavy and impossible to see through, slowly began to clear. You could smell the lingering scent of your favorite meal in the air, feel the warmth of someone's hand in yours, and hear the sound of Benedict's voice as he spoke about the extensive history of balloons. When you squeeze their hand habitually, calling out their name with a voice that sounds painfully raw, they jump and turn to look down at you, their head moving so quickly you could have sworn, if they were human, their neck would have broken right then and there. His first instinct is to grab and hold you, but he doesn't, faltering for a moment before he speaks rapidly and moves to stand up, rushing to the little kitchen in your wagon to fetch you a glass of water. He comes back to your side and hands it to you, grabbing at your clothing with his index finger and thumb as you sit up slowly to take a drink. He needed to touch you in some manner, afraid that if he didn't, you would slip away from him again. After drinking enough water to help wet your parched throat, he goes back to holding your hand, asking you if you want to talk about what had happened (he's sure to let you know you don't have to if you don't want to). Whether you choose to tell him or not, he sincerely apologises for breaking into your wagon, looking like a kicked puppy as he does so. Though when he hears your laugh, it is like all the negative emotions swirling in his head are washed away. Benedict smiles softly beneath his mask, and he swears to himself he will never allow you to go through another moment like this alone again.
“Ah! Good morning, my dear!! Or, rather, good afternoon now, haha! I… would you like to talk about it? W-We don't have to, of course – please don't feel pressured to share or anything! I want to make sure that I know what to do the next time something like this happens! Does it… happen to you a lot? I can't imagine how scary that must be… I'm glad I came in, and, uh… I apologize for picking your lock, but in my defense, I thought something horrible had happened to you, and—! …H-Huh? Why are you laughing?? Come on, I'm not even trying to be funny right now! Well, nevertheless, I'm happy to see your smiling face again – it always brightens up my days.”
💬: It was after a performance one night when it happened. You had convinced Clementine to spend the evening with you (after some… somewhat excessive pleading on your end). It wasn't that they didn't like spending time with you — rather, it was actually quite the opposite. They enjoyed your presence, your voice, and the time you were willing to, at least in their eyes, sacrifice just so you two could have more moments together. It was nothing that you did that made Clementine want to keep their distance; that was fully on them. However, when they agreed to spend the night with you after being thoroughly convinced, you were ecstatic. Clementine had made their way over to your designated car in the train's layout, opening the door and entering, clad in much more casual attire than their usual getup. Inside, you were waiting, a wide smile on your face as you began to pull out a variety of different activities you managed to grab for the impromptu sleepover. However, for whatever reason, your chipper mood dissolved like paper in water, and your excitement didn't last long. Memories you thought you had worked through and moved past flooded into your mind, and it made you feel like you were drowning. You couldn't even be sure as to what triggered the sudden episode, either… Was it the food you had made? Was it the song that played over the radio, or the specific lighting of the room? It could have even been a sudden change in fabric texture when you shifted on the bed where you sat that made you begin to spiral, your mind growing distant from your body in an attempt to keep itself safe. Nothing felt right, and yet, you couldn't even ask Clementine for help. You couldn't speak — your throat felt like it was closing up, and your brain was refusing to string the correct words together.
💬: Clementine can tell something was wrong when you went from talking their ear off to suddenly not speaking at all. When they turn to look at you and see that distant and dazed look in your eyes, they call out your name in an attempt to see what is wrong. When you don't reply, when you don't even react to their voice, they find themselves frozen, too. Your vitals sounded consistent, heart rate not having increased or decreased, but the scent of your fear and anxiety was thick in the air, and it made Clementine nearly choke while their stomach churned. They couldn't stay here with you… The fact that you were entirely helpless in the moment caused panic to well up inside their chest. They were worried they would hurt you and not be able to keep their desires to consume you at bay — that they would do something to make whatever you were experiencing worse, so they ran. With quick movements, they stand up from the floor and rush out of your wagon, the door slamming behind them with a loud thud. Even in your dazed state, you watched Clemetine stand up and bolt out of your train car, leaving you completely alone in the now silent space. You wanted to call out to them, beg them not to leave you here alone, but the words your mind so desperately wanted to scream never came. You find yourself unable to do much of anything besides stare blankly at the door, almost hoping that Clementine will come back, but they never do. Eventually, your mind goes blank, and all you can focus on is the way your lungs expand and deflate with each breath.
💬: It takes your brain a while to realize that multiple people waltzed into your train car, almost as though it was buffering and trying to process the new visual and auditory stimulation. The door that had remained in the same position for however long opened, and multiple familiar figures stepped inside the space. You're snapped out of your ruminating by the sound of their voices, and your eyes move to look up at the people who were suddenly surrounding you… It made you feel like you were some kind of exhibit at a museum. Clara was standing over you, her brows pinched in concern as she kneeled beside your bed, hands hovering over your form. When she asks if she can touch you, her voice a gentle whisper, you nod, and she carefully places a palm on your shoulder, rubbing comforting circles against your shirt-covered arm. Benedict was hovering nearby, his body stiff as he fiddled with his hands, watching over you while Clara continued her attempts to soothe your mind. You could hear the faint sound of Adelina and Galen talking outside, but those were the only voices you could make out. Clementine was nowhere to be found, and that fact made a stone weigh heavily in your chest. Clara asks Benedict to dim the lights and turn off the radio, which he does without question, and after what feels like ages, slowly, your mind returns to your body.
💬: All of them take the time to check up on you, trying their best not to overwhelm you, but wanting to make sure that you are okay to be left alone for the remainder of the evening (Benedict offers to keep you company, but you decline his offer for tonight). Once your flesh felt like yours again and unwanted memories were no longer dictating your consciousness, everyone leaves, some more hesitantly than others, but just like that, you're once again the only person in the wagon. The silence feels heavy, and a part of you wishes that you had asked someone to stay. At some point, you fall asleep, but you wake up to the sound of someone knocking on your door. When you force yourself to get out of bed, still feeling the strange lingering sensation of your dissociative episode, you make your way to the door and open it. Clementine stands there for a moment, quiet, before commenting that you look better than you did and asks if they could come inside, head bowed low and hands fidgeting with the hem of their cardigan. You nod and step aside, and they immediately begin to talk, all of the words flowing out of their mouth like vomit. They kept apologizing, kept saying that they couldn't help you, so they ran to get people who could. It's not as though they wanted to leave you, but they knew they had to — they were afraid they'd make things worse, or do something they could never take back. At some point, you try your best to comfort them, placing a reassuring hand on their shoulder as the two of you move to sit on your mattress, something that only makes them feel the heavy sensation of guilt become more unbearable. Despite wanting to run, to do everything they could to never see you again, they didn't want to. Clementine didn't want you to think it was your fault they suddenly stopped talking to you (that was all on them), so they carefully took your hands in theirs, promising you they wouldn't let you down like that again.
“I-I'm sorry, I didn't know what to do. You weren't talking, and you weren't moving, and I–… I had to leave. I was scared I would hurt you, o-or do something to make everything worse. I didn't want to do that. Not to you, of all people… please, tell me what you need me to do, or what you want me to do. I can get Adelina, or Benedict, or Galen, or Clara again — they've already shown they're more helpful than I could ever possibly be, and I… I just want you to be safe, and healthy, and… I'm sorry. Y-You shouldn't be the one having to comfort me after you just experienced... whatever that was… I'm sorry – I won't let you down again.”
🔪: You two had been walking around the nearby town, taking in all the new sights of the area while Dartios dragged you happily along behind him, his attention being pulled in twenty different directions at once. This was something that you simply had to accept whenever you accompanied them on their excursions around the cities the circus stopped in, and most of the time, it was fine. Though when you suddenly caught the whiff of something that made it almost difficult to breathe, unwanted memories rushed into your mind like water out of a broken dam. Suddenly, just like that, everything changed. The freeing and somewhat exciting moment of exploring this new place with Dartois by your side became one of anxiety and fear, almost as if you had just been thrown and locked inside a cage with no hope of being let out. It felt like your throat was closing up, and the longer you spent weaving your way through crowds of people, the more the world around you blurred. You felt trapped, and your body started to feel like it was not yours anymore. It was like you were controlling a puppet, limbs feeling like little needles were being shoved into your skin and causing painful jolts to shoot through your muscles; even the beating in your chest began to feel foreign, the longer time ticked on. Dartois is slow to notice your sudden change in disposition, talking about and pointing to anything and everything that catches her attention. However, it's after the seventh or eighth time you don't respond to their comments that they realize there might be something wrong. They immediately stop walking, your body colliding with the back of theirs. This sudden break causes others walking down the sidewalk to make comments about the human-shaped obstacles in their way, huffing loudly as they're forced to move around the two of you.
🔪: Dartois turns around and tilts their head at you, calling out your name before poking your cheek with their index finger. When you don't say anything or even react when he touches you, he hums and pulls you off to the side, fingers intertwined with yours. He drags you through different alleyways and less-traveled paths in the town, eventually stopping when pavement and brick become grass beneath your soles. City noises and smells thin out, replaced by the scent of a fresh-cut lawn and blooming spring flowers. Dartois stops to look at you one more time, taking note of the distant look in your eyes. They're unsure of what to do, so they sit you down on a nearby bench and… leave you there. Perhaps you needed some food, so they did just that, rushing off to find you something to eat or drink — anything they thought you'd like, really. Meanwhile, you're sitting alone on a bench in a foreign city park, trying to focus on the way the wood grain feels underneath your fingertips while the sound of children laughing in the distance echoes through the area. You can hear the sound of a fountain bubbling, the occasional bark of a dog coming from nearby, and the muffled voices of people talking in the distance. The sun felt warm on your skin as it filtered through leaves, and in that moment, you closed your eyes, focusing on the way your chest moved with each breath while birds chirped away in the background. Then, the sun disappears when a shadow suddenly falls across your eyelids. When you force your eyes open again, which took far too much energy to do, Dartois is standing in front of you, holding an impressive amount of different things in her arms. They move to sit next to you, placing the items they had gathered around you like one would an altar.
🔪: He had brought you a few of your favorite snacks and drinks, as well as random items like a small toy, a stuffed animal, and even some fresh-cut flowers whose petals were crinkled and some stems clearly broken (did they buy these things, or did they take whatever they found they thought you might like?). When you don't move to touch or take anything, nor do you react to their gifts, Dartois can't help but wonder what they did to upset you to such a severe degree. So, he places the stuffed animal in your lap, and he gently opens your hand to place the little fidget he had found in your palm. It wasn't anything flashy, just a stress ball filled with putty, but its weight was grounding in your hand, and you squeezed it, watching the way it bubbled between your fingers. Despite his initial thought being that he had made you feel this way, he also knew he had never once before seen you in such a state. Everything felt… strange to them, and they attempted to speak to you, but once again, they were met with silence and that eerily blank look. So, instead of continuing to try what didn't work, they decided to take the time to explore the nearby park, giving you some more time alone. You watch as they chase a gaggle of geese near the lake (and are subsequently chased back) before they turn their attention to a nearby tree, attempting to climb up it… which results in them tumbling off the branches moments after hoisting themselves up into the leaves. You feel a smile form on your face before you realize it, hand still fiddling with the stress toy absentmindedly.
🔪: When Dartois makes her way back to where you were sitting on the bench, you look much better than you did before she had left, and she looks much more ragged than she did before wandering away to explore the park. They take a seat beside you, and you ask them if they had a good time, your words causing their shoulders to fall as the tension they didn't know they were holding in is released from their body. You were talking again, and your eyes were no longer fogged with that indescribable look that caused their own body to feel uneasy. Without missing a beat, he asks if he did something to upset you, and you have to explain to him the way your mind responds whenever something reminds you of the past — of something that happened to you long before you two had ever met. He doesn't understand it, unable to wrap his mind around the fact that your brain decided to make your body and mind shut down as a means to keep you safe from itself, but he tries. He wants to try for you, especially if this is something that could happen again. He doesn't want to have to resort to simply sitting on the sidelines, watching helplessly as you disconnect from the world around you. With a smile, you take one of his hands in yours, rubbing a thumb across his knuckles, and Dartois wonders how you could be so kind. You thank him for the gifts, saying that the stress ball had helped ground you with its weight, and ask where he had gotten them. You weren't surprised when he said he simply found everything lying around unguarded, but all you could do was silently hope that no one had seen someone as… unique-looking as Dartious casually stealing fidget toys, flowers, and various snacks.
“You humans are so… strange. I cannot imagine having a mind that purposefully does something like that. What's the purpose? …To protect you? What is it protecting you from? I am aware that my current form doesn't seem particularly impressive by your standards, but I would be able to keep you safe from… Oh. Your brain does such a thing to protect your mind from itself? My, how incredibly frustrating that must be, and how terribly inefficient… I cannot help but be a bit curious about all of this now. I will be sure to ask around for more information on how to aid you during such a conundrum… You have my word that I will do better next time if this were to happen again, my dear human.”
💪🏾: Elliott wasn’t a gentle person. If anything, he was the complete opposite — crude, cold, and sometimes cruel if he felt as though the barriers he had around his heart were starting to crumble because of your presence. Despite himself, however, he had been permitting you to be around him more than usual and for longer periods of time as of late. Sure, the two of you still butted heads, but it was almost routine now at this point, and he found himself enjoying every time he managed to annoy you. He liked the way your face contorted with thinly veiled irritation, or the way your brows twitched when he said something to rub you the wrong way (sometimes, he even managed to get that reaction without meaning to). You were both working together when it happened, random and unprecedented. You were packing up the circus equipment to get ready to hit the tracks and travel to the next city on the tour when someone said something to you. You couldn't remember who said it, or even what was said, but it was something that reminded you of them, and just like that, you were somewhere else mentally while your body just… moved on autopilot without any input from your consciousness. Walls were erected inside your brain to shut out the world, making everything around you seem almost fake as you kept repeating the same motions over and over — bend down, grab, stand, carry, load, walk back, bend down, grab, stand, carry, load, walk back… Meanwhile, Elliott was working on getting the heavier pieces of equipment packed into their designated train car, continuing to speak to you in an attempt to get you to snap at him like you usually did whenever he annoyed you too much. Though when you don't respond to him or even acknowledge his presence, he pauses, taking a short break from his duties to watch as you move about with robotic-like motions.
💪🏾: Well, that was strange. You hadn't given him the cold shoulder or the silent treatment for quite a while, so why all of a sudden did you go unresponsive? He didn't even think he said anything too out of the ordinary… nothing to get this type of reaction, at least. You were talking with him just fine before, making little jabs of your own, and now, you were completely silent. He continues to attempt to get you to respond to him, still in that teasing tone of his, but when you go about your tasks without a word, almost like he wasn't there, it starts rubbing him the wrong way. He knew it shouldn't bother him; you were a human he shouldn't have even been getting close to in the first place, but it was bothering him, and he didn't like that. So, he sets down what he was carrying and walks over to where you were working. He crosses his arms over his chest, leaning against the train car before asking you to give him at least a hint on what he did to upset you so greatly. Another long stretch of silence has him letting out a deep sigh, and he walks over to you, placing a hand on your shoulder and turning you around, forcing you to at least look at him while he speaks. However, when your eyes meet his, he realizes right then and there that something is… off. You didn't appear to be upset, and you didn't even seem fully coherent in the moment, eyes glazed over as you practically stared right through him. While he didn't know everything about you (he purposefully made sure he never did get a full grasp on you), he was also able to say with certainty he had never seen you in such a despondent state before. This was completely new, and he had no clue what to do.
💪🏾: No matter how many times he called out your name or attempted to shake you back to reality (even lightly tapping your face with his calloused fingertips), nothing seemed to be working. Something wasn't right, and he had a feeling that he needed to get you somewhere else ASAP. He remembers watching wild animals in the woods hunker down in brush whenever injured or ill to protect themselves as much as possible, so Elliott helps you do just that, throwing an arm over your shoulder as he leads you through the crowds of your coworkers attempting to pack up the remaining pieces of the circus, informing them that the two of you are taking a break. Your eyes absentmindedly watch the ground as you walk across it, trying to take in the sight of every small pebble or ant you can see and keep your mind from drifting back to those memories you found replaying in your brain like a broken record. You didn't know where Elliott was taking you, and you strangely didn't care. Then, after a few minutes of walking, the familiar scent of your personal wagon hit your nose. It was a comforting smell, but you don't have time to linger on that feeling before you suddenly go from standing up to lying down. Carefully, Elliott removes his arm from around your shoulder, pushing you down to lie on your bed with surprising gentleness. He stares at you for a moment, your eyes still hazy as you stare up at him, before he makes himself comfortable beside you with a sigh, one arm tucked behind his head while the other rests across his stomach. He didn't say anything — didn't find the need to, especially since you weren't going to respond anyway.
💪🏾: He stays there with you for quite a while. Eventually, after what seemed like an eternity, your mind clears, and you find yourself back in the present moment, memories of the past once again having returned to the back of your mind. When you sit up, he's immediately asking you what that was all about. Elliott isn't very considerate to begin with, so he's not going to give you any more respite time when he has questions that he feels should be answered. If you tell him what happened and what triggered it, he finds himself feeling a bit relieved it wasn't because of him (why does he feel that way?), but he also finds it a bit annoying. What do you mean you can't always know when it's going to happen? He has a stubborn streak, too, so he'll be adamant about the fact that he was going to find a way, somehow, to help lessen the dissociative and derealization symptoms you experience when an episode is triggered. Now, what he does after you're back to your somewhat regular self depends on your reaction/reponse, as well as your relationship. Either he'll roll his eyes at you before excusing himself with a dismissive handwave, or he'll stay there with you, still lying across your bed before holding up an arm as an invitation to you to come closer. He's able to recognize that what you experienced wasn't pleasant for you, and that, even after, you were still not feeling well mentally. He has a… soft spot, even if it's small, for creatures he sees as being vulnerable. There's a strange urge in his chest to protect you, even if it goes against everything he believes in and stands for, but he'll find himself there with you lying against his chest as he rubs your back, the two of you sitting in silence without any playful bickering or teasing for a change. It's strange for him, and he hates that a part of him enjoys being there for you.
“Hey, now, come on – don't be pullin' this kinda thing with me. If yer upset, I'll get you somethin' as an apology gift. Anythin' you want… Really now? The silent treatment? Heheh, it's been a while since you've pulled that one on me… You know, this is startin' to lose its charm real fast. Could ya at least give me a hint? I ain't got a faintest idea about what 'ta do with ya when you get like this. | …So, what was all that for, huh? …Whatcha mean you weren't doin' it on purpose? Jeez, why don't 'cha tell me about this before it happens? What do ya mean there's nothin' I can do to help? Well, too bad. You know how bullheaded I can be sometimes, and I ain't stoppin' that now."
⊱ You're the Most Jealous Person I Know ⊰ || Cirque des Débuts X Reader
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Character(s): Adelina, Benedict, Clementine, Dartois, and Elliott (Cirque des Débuts)
Reader Type: Human (Gender-Neutral Pronouns)
Warning(s): Discussions of Jealousy and Mildly Possessive Behavior. Genre: "Headcanons"/Scenario, Romantic or Platonic Relationship. Word Count: ~1,950 words.
Prompt: "Where would the characters fall on a scale based on how jealous/possessive they can be?"
Author’s Note: This is just a fun excuse to explore which of my characters would have the biggest jealousy streak and/or which one would be the most possessive! While some of them are more likely to become jealous or start being a bit more demanding regarding your attention, I do want to make it clear that none of them would ever do anything to purposefully cut you off from your support system or anyone else outside your relationship with them. While yes, they may get jealous sometimes or be slightly possessive of you, it wouldn't get to the point where it becomes extremely toxic/borderline "yandere" behavior (unless they're allowed or permitted to get to that point, but that's a discussion for another day lmao). While some of the cast understand human relationships with more nuance since they "grew up" surrounded by them (Adelina, Benedict, Clementine), others have not been around enough humans/experienced enough of humanity first-hand to understand what is and what isn't healthy (Dartois, Elliott). At the end of the day, they're creatures that mimic humans, and they may need someone who can explain to them what is and isn't acceptable in relationships. Characters are listed from Least→Most, with the characters at the top typically not getting jealous/possessive, while the ones closer to the bottom experience those feelings more often. Check out the game's itch.io page or read more about the characters on my Ao3!
→ The artwork for the banners was created by and belongs to me, as do my OCs. Please do not use them anywhere else — thank you!
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🎩: Adelina doesn't get jealous all that much, nor is she possessive of you. Yes, they might be a bit overprotective at times (they just want to protect the people they care for the most, which now includes you), but they don't feel that bitter taste of jealousy in their mouth whenever they see you hanging out or spending time with other people. She thinks it's great that you have people outside of her to lean on if you were to need it. Adelina is aware of her… limitations regarding the emotional aspects of relationships, so if you have to go to someone to receive the comfort you need, she's not going to hold that against you, nor is she going to take it as a personal attack. They know the areas in which they lack, and while they are trying to improve, they know it's not something that can be done overnight. If anything, she is more likely to be jealous of you, not of the people you're spending your time with. They feel a twinge of jealousy whenever they see you being your authentic self, smiling and laughing together with everyone at the circus, and a part of them wishes they could do the same. However, those feelings of jealousy quickly fade when she's able to be in your presence, experiencing you firsthand. When the two of you are alone or are spending time with her kin, she feels it's a lot easier to be herself around you, and that jealousy fades just as quickly as it appeared. Now, if you want to try to make Adelina jealous, good luck with that. She'll be able to sense right away that something is off, and she would most likely call you out if she felt you were purposefully attempting to get some kind of reaction out of her.
“Hmm? Oh, are you going out for a bit? Well, thank you for telling me — I hope you have a good time with everyone. If anything happens or if you need me for anything at all, just let me know, and I will be there… Why are you looking at me like that? You… wanted me to tell you to stay? My, you're so strange. If you wanted my attention, you could have just told me so. There's no need to jump through so many hoops.”
💪🏾: Elliott is, I'd argue, a perfect example of someone who desperately tries to appear nonchalant but who, deep down, isn't as detached as he wants to be perceived to be. Now, he's in no way a jealous person, nor is he possessive of you, but that's not to say he never feels that way, which makes him differ a bit from Adelina. He doesn't care much about a lot of things, and while he tries to make it seem as though he doesn't care about you/your relationship with him, it's a front. He does (begrudgingly) care about you, and even if he won't say it aloud, he does enjoy spending time with you, but he's not going to get jealous over you talking or spending time with others. He also doesn't feel the need to keep you all to himself; he's lived alone most of his life, so if you're spending time with someone else, that just means he can have some much-needed decompression time. Now, while he normally avoids any type of affection or intimacy like the plague, if he feels as though you've become distant or started putting him on the back burner to spend more time with people who aren't him, Elliott is going to make his displeasure known in a very roundabout way, which is unlike him. He'll start by asking you about who you've been spending time with, what all you've been doing, and then randomly drop the direct question of why you've been ignoring him lately. Elliott does have a slightly inflated ego, so he doesn't exactly take too kindly to you ignoring him in favor of other people, especially if you were only doing it on purpose to get a rise out of him.
“Hey, long time no see. How was last night? Didja have a good time out? Yeah, yeah — that's nice. Quick question, but are ya doin' all this to purposefully try to get a rise outta me? …Why do I say that? Well, it seems like you've been throwin' me on the back burner lately, is all, and I didn't think I did anythin' recently to piss ya off… Whatcha mean it sounds like I'm jealous? Nah, I'm not — I just don't appreciate bein' seen as second best."
💬: Clementine falls perfectly in the middle of the cast, like they tend to do with most things (they're a living definition of being neutral/moderate). They experience sudden bursts of jealousy and possessiveness on occasion, like most people, and when these instances do happen, they usually become distant from you until those feelings fade. They primarily do this for your own safety, as their urge to consume/devour you can become quite intense during moments of jealousy and possessiveness (they really don't want to accidentally erase you from existence). They're one of the members of the main cast who is most experienced in dealing with these emotions, especially since they're the only one of their kin who has had multiple deep, emotional connections with humans (Clara and Seren being the two big examples). Clementine knows when they're starting to get jealous of other people when they suddenly have the urge to go over, grab you, and drag you away from the world so your attention is solely focused on them and your presence is theirs and theirs alone. They normally despise being the center of attention in intimate settings, but when they feel like they're being ignored by you, someone whom they hold in high regard and want to be vulnerable with, it becomes extremely difficult not to act on their instinct and keep you all to themselves. Because of their conflicting thoughts and emotions, Clemetine can teeter between being distant and clingy with you, and it's just kind of a toss-up on which version of them you're going to get. Now, if you purposefully try to do something to make them jealous, they will get upset with you, especially if you get another person (like Clara or Benedict) to help you, and you will get the silent treatment.
“I, umm… Do you want to go out and do something after tonight's show? With, uh, with me? …W-What's with that look? Come on, it can't be that weird — I just want to spend more time with you, and… No, I don't want them coming along. I just want it to be the two of us for a change... I guess I'm feeling a bit jealous, but I'd argue anyone would be in my position if someone they care about always wants other people to tag along on our outings...”
🔪: Dartois feels jealous and possessive of you quite frequently, though they have a difficult time wrapping their head around it (those are very new emotions for them). He has an inflated sense of ego due to his "upbringing," so he can never quite understand why you would choose to spend time with anyone else when he's right there. They thought that they were all you needed, so what do you mean you want to spend time with someone else? She's able to recognize that certain behaviors get her the results she wants, so sometimes she will purposely act a certain way in an attempt to guilt you into staying with her or spending more time with her (they can be manipulative when they want to be). Now, if you take the time to explain to Dartois that they are enough and that you do appreciate them as a person/friend/partner, but that you can't solely rely on them or hang out with them every second of every day, they do (kind of) understand. He still might not be very happy about sharing your attention with others, but he does think of you incredibly highly, so it only makes sense to him that other people want to be in your presence as well. One way that Dartois copes with their intense feelings of jealousy and possessiveness is by making arrangements with you so that if you spend the day with your other friends or family members, they'll make sure that there is at least one day where it's just the two of you doing something together. This way, they can have you all to themselves while still allowing you to be around and nurture relationships with others. So, even if they're not thrilled about sharing your attention, they do care about you and never want to do anything to make you feel distressed or lonely.
“Where are you off to? …Ah, you're hanging out with them again? I was hoping we could spend some more time together this evening. I even made arrangements — aren't you proud of me? I can't blame everyone for wanting to be near you; you're the most godly human I've had the pleasure of meeting, but… Well, before you go, would you be able to grant me a self-indulgent wish? I would like to have your full, undivided attention tomorrow… Hehe, thank you for spoiling me, my dear human.”
🤡: Benedict is hands-down the most jealous of the cast, but it's not a trait he is proud of having. He doesn't enjoy experiencing jealousy, nor does he necessarily want to keep you all to himself, but he does feel a bit insecure sometimes, especially if you're not spending a lot of time with him compared to other people. You're the only human who knows exactly what they are, and yet you still choose to stick around and care for them despite that. You're special to him, and he can't lose you, so he tends to do things to keep your attention and affection solely directed to him. Benedict has always craved closeness with others — with humanity as a whole — but he always knew that he would never be accepted for what he was… and then you came along and did just that. He knows jealousy is an ugly thing, and he does his best not to let it affect him or your relationship with him. Most of the time, when he's jealous, you won't even know. They keep it to themselves, and the only way you could tell is that they may be a bit more clingy or might even be a bit more demanding of your attention. He'll never make you stop hanging out with people you care about, but he might insert himself in situations or conversations where he wasn't expected or invited to be a part of. They'll find ways to show you how great they are to have around by making you your favorite foods or doing anything and everything they can to make you smile and laugh; if they're useful to have around, maybe you'll be more likely to spend time with them. Benedict definitely needs the most reassurance, especially by explaining to him that he doesn't have to do anything for you to stay.
“Oh, there you are! I've been looking all over for you! …Ah, am I interrupting the two of you? My apologies, but Adelina wanted me to fetch you — she said there was something she needed us to tend to post-haste! …Hmm? Is something the matter? …O-Of course I'm not lying, I—… I'm sorry, I just— I've felt like you've been distant with me lately, but I should have never lied to you. You can go back, but I just would like to request your attention later this evening, if you're able to.”
← Previous Development Log || Next Development Log →
Long time no see, everyone! Wow, it's been a while since I've provided any updates for this VN, but that's not to say I haven't been working on it! It's a bit hard juggling a full-time job and multiple creative projects at the same time, especially with the sudden influx of financial stressors and health issues I've experienced within the past six months... 2026 has certainly been a wild ride. 😅
I have been dealing with carpal tunnel recently, in addition to my tendonitis and arthritis, so the pain in my hands/wrists has made drawing extremely difficult as of late, but thankfully, when I wasn't able to draw, I was at least able to make myself get some writing and planning done! I have ironed out Adelina's portion of the prologue and finalized the ending section where all three characters' branches/"routes" converge, which is very exciting for me, especially considering how all over the place they originally were.
I had to go in and add additional scenes since, while writing, I realized the players weren't going to be able to see everything I wrote in a single playthrough, so these new scenes were much needed to both provide an introduction/chance to meet all of the characters and have more content that can be experienced and explored. Adelina's portion has been fully planned out, but I still need to go in and add more to Benedict's and Clementine's "routes". As of right now, the opening scene and first ending combined are roughly 3.2k words, and Adelina's portion of the prologue is around 7k words (and I am only about 1/4th of the way done with her section).
Pictured above is the current decision tree for the game, with the top portion being Adelina's, the little cluster underneath being Benedict's, and the section/string of events to the right being where all three "routes" converge. Clementine's portion (marked with a purple dot in the bottom left) is still in the process of being digitally planned out/depicted, but I do have the rough decision tree for their portion written in my notebook. While making the decision tree, additional "bad" endings were added, so there are more endings where the game ends and you have the chance to start over or try again.
Overall, scripting has been going well, all things considered! In between working on the script, I have been writing little drabbles of the characters to act as writing practice and to ensure I have a firm grip on the cast, their motivations, their values, and their drives. All of these pieces can be read here on my Ao3. Since the game is still in progress, the depictions of the characters do have a chance to change later down the line, but that chance is fairly low considering these characters and their stories have been planned out/envisioned for quite some time now.
Regarding coding, I haven't done much in that realm, sadly. I have a lot of big ideas for this VN, and I still have a very long way to go when it comes to figuring out code so I can make the game do what I need it to. As of right now, I am going to focus on finishing the prologue as best as I can, but I may start accepting volunteers at some point in the future, especially for coding assistance and background/art assets.
Because of my wrist/joint pain, updates in the visual art department have been slow (heartbreakingly so 💔). However, I have finalized the placeholder sprites and designs for Clementine's and Benedict's performance outfits! Benedict's performance outfit is not as jester-forward as his beta design was, but I think that's for the better; his current hat makes for a much more interesting silhouette than his previous outfit provided.
Clementine, on the other hand, is the only member of the cast who hasn't changed much from their first design concept, and I love them for that. I have no clue why Clementine's sprite looks so much cleaner than Benedict's, but they are placeholders, so I'm not too worried about it haha. However, I may go and alter Clementine's color scheme down the line, as it seems a bit too similar tonally across the board.
Speaking of Clementine, I have finalized all of their current expression variations on their placeholder sprite! It's a lot of fun to show how each of the characters emotes with their eyes, and Clementine was one of my favorites to work on, considering their meeker/less confident personality when compared to Adelina and Benedict. I might go back and change a few of them, and I'm certainly planning on adding more combinations, but I think these will suffice for the prologue perfectly!
That is all the updates I have for this project as of right now, and I hope everyone is staying nice and cool during this horrendous heat wave/dome that most areas of the world are currently experiencing. As a small bonus artwork, here are rough designs of what Adelina, Benedict, and Clementine looked like as "children"! I always find it to be a very fun exercise to draw characters when they were younger while still retaining aspects of the characters that make them memorable/recognizeable. I hope to go more in-depth about their species and their backstories as soon as I finish the prologue, but man, it's so hard for me not to spoil too much in these dev logs. 😭
All artwork in this post belongs to me, and reposting my artwork on other sites is prohibited! Thank you very much!
If you enjoy my work or would just like to support me, consider checking out my Ko-fi. Any little bit helps. ♡
I am participating in Art Fight this year now that I have gotten my carpal tunnel, tendonitis, and arthritis somewhat under control, and I'm excited to share that my characters from my WIP visual novel Cirque des Débuts are the ones you can attack (if you so desire)!
I prioritize revenge attacks, since I don't want my wrists/hands to get as bad as they were earlier this year, but my goal is to attack anyone who attacks me first! I can draw pretty much any kind of character, but I do need more practice with animals/feral designs and anything mechanical.
My Dead by Daylight fixation is quite severe right now (the update and roadmap aren't helping), and I really want to write some headcanons or drabbles for the killers, but I have no clue where to start and no ideas to go off of. 😭
If you can send in some requests/suggestions, I'd appreciate it! Please keep it to the original killers + Danny Johnson/The Ghostface, though, because I want to write more content for them versus the licensed killers who I feel it's easier to find content for since they exist in media outside the game.
My top favs right now are probably Singularity/Hux, Huntress/Anna, and Hillbilly/Max, but I'm down to write for all of them (except Dredge... sorry Dredge lovers... 💔 Clown is also pushing it lmao).
Lets just throw it out there that you write the best fanfiction stories I've ever read, oki bye have a wonderful nightday :3
Thank you so much for the kind words!! That's such a big compliment, too, omg... 😳
I've been in a slump lately when it comes to writing anything fandom-related, so it makes me so happy when people comment on my fics or just show they support me in one way or another.
Thank you again for your kindness, and I hope you have a great day/night as well (I love the reaction image, too). 🥹❤️
"Ao3 should allow multiple kudos" "I want to be able to leave more than one kudos"
COMMENT ON THE FUCKING FIC
I SWEAR TO GOD NO ONE COMMENTS MUCH NOW WHEN THE ONLY WAY TO SHOW APPRECIATION FOR A SINGLE CHAPTER IS COMMENTING AND I AM NOT HAVING THIS BULLSHIT BE LIKE TIKTOK WHERE NO ONE EVER COMMENTS POSITIVITY
FOR FUCKS SAKE JUST COMMENT ON THE FUCKING FIC YOU DON'T NEED A MULTIPLE KUDOS BUTTON YOU NEED ACTUAL WORDS
TRUST ME ON ANY WEBSITE OR APP I POST COMMENTS AND WORDS ARE 10X BETTER THAN ANY PLAIN LIKE AND WORDLESS REBLOG IF YOU LIKE SOMETHING LEAVE WORDS
Oughhhh, I got hit with a one-shot idea for ADWD2:R last night while I was trying to sleep. I played the demo after work yesterday (LOVED it, btw), and...
Since Grim Reapers are now allowed to know they were once human, I think that raises a lot of interesting potential internal conflict for the MC! Like, 0213 (MC) and 0204 (Atlas) have multiple conversations about their "favorite" things despite only existing in their new lives for a few days, picking out "human" names for themselves that feel right, etc.
I low-key want to make a one-shot with 0213/MC confiding in 0204/Atlas and 5012 (they'd both get their own seperate one-shots/sections around the same topic) about how, even though they have a favorite color, a favorite vowel, etc., is that something they have in common with their past life, or is it something that makes them unique from their prior life? Idk, it just came to me before I passed out, and I really like the idea and the potential angst that it carries ehehehe.
~Dialogue example below of what I'm trying to convey because I don't think I did a good enough job lol~
0204: "I can see you're thinking real hard about something... What's going on in that pretty head of yours, partner?"
0213: "Well... I was just thinking about how much I like the rain."
0204: "That's it? That's what has you looking all broody? Hehe... you look like 5012 whenever you make that face."
0213: "No, I was just... wondering whether I liked rain, you know?"
0204: "What are you talking about? Did you hit your head or something?"
0213: "I just... can't help but wonder about my life as a human, and how much that version of me... stuck."
0213: "Would they like who I am now? Would we get along? Hehe... maybe we're so different from one another, we'd both be shocked I was once them, and they were now me."
0204: "Damn, that's... kind of heavy. Are you feeling alright?"
0213: "I'm okay, I just... I wonder if they would regret becoming a reaper if they knew this is what it would be."
0213: "I keep daydreaming about what all I gave up, or how... horrible my life might have been if I went so far as to erase the memories I had of it."
Okay chat, be honest with me... am I cooking with this?? Would anyone be interested in seeing a one-shot based around this premise? I just really like the idea of the MC seeing their past life as a long-lost friend they can't talk to again because anything remotely related to self-love or self-connection makes me emotional.
Tomodachi Life: Living the Dream X The Freak Circus
I have been thoroughly enjoying the Tomodachi Life: Living the Dream demo, and I am so incredibly excited for the full release in a few weeks!! Right now, I have two islands - one of the islands is solely for my OCs, and the other one is for some of my favorite fictional characters (it will be a multifandom island, and you know damn well I'm going to try my best to put Sebastian Solace and Sans on there, too). 😌
When the full game comes out, I'm going to make more MC-like characters (since, right now, I just have a Fem!MC), and add the remaining members of the TFC cast for funsies!! These were just some of my favorite screenshots I took that I desperately needed to share because I got a kick out of them lmao.
...Also, please ignore the messy face paint on Pierrot and Harlequin. I'm planning on going back and making it look a little cleaner later. 😔
I thought I would share some posts I've made on Instagram related to my CYOA monster story, which I've been working on a little bit here and a little bit there over the past few months! I'm still in the process of finalizing character designs and figuring out how exactly I want each of them to look, but I thought I would go ahead and share what I have managed to create so far to garner some attention for the project/characters. 🥰
This first post was published on (02/12/26) when I was beginning character conceptualization for the harpy, leshy, mercreature, and will-o'-the-wisp characters. However, the harpy character has undergone major revisions as I'm still trying to figure out how exactly I want her to look in both silhouette and anatomy (such as how many fingers on her wings, and what that would look like skeletally).
29 likes, 9 comments - _purple.plums_ on February 12, 2026: "Woe, concept art be upon ye! 🫳🏻🫳🏻 I have so many different projects and WIPs go
This second post was published on (04/02/26), and it is a collection of traditional sketches I've done throughout the months to play around with character designs, dynamics, and personalities. This is also the first post where The Amalgam was showcased; this monster is an eldritch being, and its existence acts as a perfect juxtaposition to the other monsters who represent nature, or naturally occurring/organic life.
31 likes, 8 comments - _purple.plums_ on April 2, 2026: "⚠️Content Warning for the final two slides of the carousel (fake blood, depictions
Anyways, thank you for reading!! I'm definitely planning on showcasing more of these characters as I work on developing their stories and the overarching plot of the story. I think the CYOA genre is such an interesting one, and I would love to be able to make a story that attempts to go beyond what the genre is traditionally known for.
I've been working on rough drafts of concept scenes that include interactions between the MC and the monsters, which I may or may not post at some point in the future, just so anyone interested can get a taste of what the characters will be like in the story! I've also started working on the decision tree and different game elements I want to include in the story (such as there being more RPG-like aspects like character stats, items, and dice rolling to determine outcomes).
I always tend to have a grand scope in mind for my original stories and projects, and this story certainly reflects that, too. 😅
Okay, so while writing my CYOA monster romance story, a new monster has come alive to fill the role of the plot's primary antagonist that wasn't originally planned. 😅 Its "lore" isn't going to be a main focus of the story. Just for context, all I will share for now is that it was a creature who was accidentally "summoned" to our world many years ago by a group of teenagers messing around in the forest, and it has been living among the trees since. It also finds humans to be incredibly beautiful, and it is somewhat obsessed with them/their bodies.
I want the monster to be somewhat alien in appearance, especially since the other monsters in the cast have close ties with nature/the natural world, and this is a monster that is the furthest thing from that. Because of this, I'm leaning a bit towards having the creature be eldritch-like in appearance. However, I don't really want to throw eyeballs and tentacles on it and call it a day, so I wanted to hear what other people thought about "eldritch" designs, and if anyone had any tips on how to make an unsettling (but still "attractive") monster!
So far, I have written down that the monster has a very thick, almost tar-like body; it would be a similar texture and consistency to slime (maybe a bit more watery, but still viscous), since the monster does not have bones, organs, skin, etc. I want it to attempt to mold/keep its appearance looking somewhat humanoid, especially since it finds humans beautiful and wants to mimic that, but its body never stays stable - it's always moving around, swirling, dripping, and the like. It also has organ-like extremities that adorn its form (like, imagine the large/small intestines, stomach, liver, etc., being on the outside of your body), but they're just there for decoration, not for function.
I put "eldritch" in quotes because I'm aware this character isn't going to be entirely eldritch, since the MC does have a few routes they can take to romance the creature/try to understand it, but I still want to make an unsettling/creepy monster in terms of both visuals and behavior. I guess what I'm asking is what are some aspects of an "eldritch" monster design that give you the creeps, and what are some aspects that kind of make you want to roll your eyes?
Any thoughts/feedback would be appreciated! I have the appearances and personalities of the other monsters pretty set in stone at this point, and this new monster just kind of... popped into existence when I was starting to outline the story and finalize the overarching plot. I have a base sketch for them, but before I finalize anything, I'd love to hear other's thoughts/opinions on the matter!
🤍The Ivory Dragon can appreciate the efforts of someone who knows how to pay their respects🤍
WHOEVER THOUGHT IT WAS THIS YEAR THAT I'D FINALLY FINISH THIS GETS A COOKIE ASDFGHJKL
Ohhh, this was a huge lesson to me on how not to make a comic. A severe lack of proper planning, experience, and motivation is what delayed this project. And while I regret taking so long, I'm happy that it's done. Visually, I wish it was more, but I can't be choosy at this point 😂
It's out and it looks alright and that's good enough! :D
1,589 Followers, 643 Following, 28 Posts - See Instagram photos and videos from 🌸( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ🌸 (@_purple.plums_)
Hello everyone! I apologize for the delay in chapter updates/requests over the past month or so. I thought that after I graduated, I would have more time to myself, but something else ended up taking the time slot my classes once took up haha! 😅 On the plus side, though, what primarily took up that open space was my love and passion for drawing/original story development coming back, so that's a win in my book!
Recently, I've started posting my art on Instagram again (after, like... a four or five year hiatus 😳), and I wanted to mention it on here to see if anyone would want to support me on that site as well! I'm currently in the process of removing inactive/bot followers, so any ounce of support would mean the world to me. 🥹
As for current inbox requests, I have: 1 request for FNAF, 6 for TWST, 2 for Homicipher, and 6 for TFC. I have started writing all of these requests, but I have yet to finish any of them (story of my life... 💔🥀). I also currently have a 14k chapter for my Pressure fanfiction in the works, so I'm in the process of wrapping that up and proofreading it a final time before posting.
Thank you all for the support, understanding, and patience! As soon as I finish all the requests, I will be opening my inbox for them again. 🥰
