Looool

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@readingsoprano
Looool
Do you think they realize how much cooler that makes it sound?
Like. I'm not even an apotheosis type of guy. But you do know that makes it sound so much cooler right?
Follow Mariam Barghouti on all the things for reporting from the West Bank. Keep amplifying the voices of Palestinians.
Monty Python and the Curse of the Nat 1.
My DnD group came across a hag who had imprisoned a variety of creatures in cages, one of them being a shark who she had tortured. Unluckily for her, my warlock can speak to animals, and asked the shark if it wanted to get revenge on the hag.
It agreed, and then our wizard casted levitation on it, and then we set it loose on the hag as a distraction while the rest of us took her down.
The party named the shark Jerry Bloodslash and it's now their pet.
DnD is made for hijinx.
Things I like about this decal on a restaurant window: -the insane orange waiter -that he’s carrying his plates in the air like a strongman -the couple looks like this isn’t the first time he’s done this, but it’s easier to just let it happen at this point. -the sign says PASTA as if he’s screaming it like a frankenstein -but he’s holding a plate of an entire chicken and a plate of wine glasses -there’s three wine glasses -one’s for him.
A real blast from the past.
It’s been almost ten years, I anticipate THOUSANDS OF REBLOGS
if you ask me, the guy who put the sword INTO the stone should be king, not the chucklefuck who got it out.
I assume the guy who put the "sword that makes you the king" into the stone, doesn't really want the position
i think the stone should be king since it held the sword the longest
You have been visited by the twocumber. May you receive twofold luck in the coming days
You have been visited by the pairrot. May you receive a pair of lucks in the near future
You have been visited by the twinana. May you receive twice as many luck in the days ahead
goddammit you got me
you got me to reblog this
I can't say no to a cute face like that.
The thing they don't tell you about getting really into one specific historical period is that very quickly every conversation turns into an attempt to avoid sounding like the "horribly wet in wexford today but not as bad as in the 690s" tweet
Me whenever someone's random comment can be connected to one of my special historical guys in some extremely tenuous way for real
A Vulcan named Stork works at the Terran adoption agency. Parents always request that he be the one to deliver their child to them.
It’s years before anyone explains it to him.
People keep gifting him robes with long white birds on them.
The fun thing is he would understand why people were getting him outfits with storks on them. That’s a word, it’s his name, straightforward. All the humans get him the same gag gift, but like, they’re putting effort in at least. This is a genuinely nice outfit. Stork will be a walking zero-effort pun sometimes, rather than waste a perfectly fine robe.
It’s fine. This is a readily comprehensible human illogic. Exactly the kind of thing he expected from moving to Earth.
Six years in he finds out about the stork bringing babies.
Stork has a good long meditation session about this myth, his name, his job, the outfits, the whole shebang (or whatever Vulcan concept is the equivalent).
And he decides he’s honored by it, in a humanly illogical way.
The humans are asking him to do what is after all his job, and specifically requesting him for the joy his name brings them on top of an already agreeable and satisfying task. He has no objection to engendering positive emotions in others. Harm hastens the heat-death of the universe, Surak teaches, so happiness must logically slow it down.
Plus, Vulcans of his generation love puns. There were two decades of punning competitions in colleges across the planet. So when he realizes that he is a walking zero-effort pun, and that the humans also love the pun, he is all for it. He is the Joe Cool of the entire Vulcan population in his city.
And via this pun, the humans are including him in a cherished and traditional myth, by casting him as the literal bringer of life and the expander of families.
There’s no downside. Stork wears his robes, pins, keychains, and other bird-related tchotchkes with genuine pride.
YES IT’S BACK ON MY DASH AT LAST
For real though working together with some human social workers, a Vulcan would be an excellent caretaker for children in an adoption center.
Child has a meltdown? Imagine Stork, perfectly calm and unbothered, approaching the kid and saying “You appear quite upset, Eliza. If you would please allow me to relocate you to the ‘bean-bag-chair,’ we can discuss the source of your distress.”
A Vulcan educated in medicine and child psychology would be endlessly patient with a kid with behavioral issues. Stork wouldn’t get or upset or frustrated. After all, these are children with medical and psychological conditions. It would be illogical to blame the child or to not treat them with the appropriate care.
Even if the a little one was having a bad day or was just overtired, Stork wouldn’t get angry. He might even be a calming presence. Any new kids acting out would learn real quick that they’d have better luck trying to arm-wrestle a Klingon than get a rise out of Stork.
Not only that, Vulcans live much longer than humans. Imagine Stork looking virtually unchanged as decades pass. Kids he’d helped years ago would turn up fully grown, maybe there to adopt their own kids, and run into Stork, looking almost exactly as they remember him.
And he’d probably remember them too. “Welcome back, Eliza.”
“…Harm hastens the heat-death of the universe, Surak teaches, so logically happiness must slow it down…”
Will reblog every time it crosses my dash 🖖🏾
i've been reading a lot of books about urban naturalism recently, and the one big thing they all talk about is how you HAVE to stop seeing nature as something that happens somewhere else. nature is not just charismatic megafauna and state parks and mountain ranges. nature is that abandoned lot that's growing native milkweed in it. nature is the murder of crows that lives in your block. nature is the moss growing on your roof and the dandelions growing in the sidewalk cracks and the song birds at your neighbor's birdfeeder. and you should care about it! you should notice it! that's YOUR nature!
@official-nature-posts
Official nature post
theres bikes around the city you can rent but you have to use an app that needs your drivers license. theres buses that drive right to your destination, but if you dont have change you need the app. you can wash your car here if you sign into the app. you can go to the bathroom here you just have to unlock it with the app that needs your location on. you can order at this restaurant if you scan the code and download the app. im losing my freaking mind
Oh, wyrm?