Secrets and Lies

Need to talk? I'm here for you. You are not alone.  Links: Suicide Prevention Lifeline The Quiet Place Project 

[ithelpstodream]

[creekfiend]

I’d like a service dog but what I really want is a service bear

[creekfiend]

*at the airport*

Airline worker: and what service does your bear provide

Me: she eats people who give me shit about my disabilities

[13lizardsinatrenchcoat]

@thebibliosphere

[thebibliosphere]

Perfect.

[crypticcripple]

Service badger is a nice alternative to those that don’t have the space for a bear

[onlyblackgirl]

The fact that white doctors don’t know how to diagnose irritations on dark skin is a serious issue that needs to be addressed.

[onlyblackgirl]

Do you know how many times I’ve been to the doctors for a skin problem and they all just shrug their shoulders, take your money and send you away? Bruh last summer I had this skin irritation that flared up for MONTHS and I went to 5-6 different doctors. None of them could figure out what the issue was. The last one finally just admitted that he was having difficulty because of my dark skin and it’s harder to tell if there’s discoloring etc. Like…why are y’all not studying dark skin in those 75 years of medical school??? 

BTW I never got the problem fixed I ended up having to google photos online to find something that looked like what I had and figure it out myself. 

[seashellronan]

no offence but let yourself be ugly!! you don’t have to fix your hair if you’re not going anywhere you don’t have to cover up ur spots or change out of your lounge pants to go buy milk like damn we really gotta let ourselves be comfortable without constantly apologising for just looking normal and it’s hard but i think we need to practice looking in the mirror and saying i look ugly af today and that’s okay!! tru self care is letting urself be ugly tbh

[uumans]

I love this version of self-love because it’s much more feasible for people who are self-conscious. Like it takes years of powerful reconditioning to convince yourself that your flaws, like stretch marks or acne or cellulitis, are attractive. It’s basically impossible for most people.

But learning to say “so what, I’m ugly, there’s more to life” not only overwrites this narrative that we have to feel attractive in some way (which is bs) but also reroutes your actual attention to just, living, instead of examining, evaluating, and judging your appearance

[beatlikebats]

Can’t tell you how many times I’ve said “lol i look like a goblin whatever, it’s part of my shtick” in the mirror. Super helpful

[the-real-eye-to-see]

Didn’t even know people are not allowed to give blood if they are gay

[captainfunkpunkandroll]

That’s been the thing for years. The HIV scare of the ‘80s prohibited us from donating blood. And they still hold that against us despite the fact that that claim has been debunked over and over again.

[discipleofpuck]

the wording on the paperwork is “Are you a man who has had sexual intercourse with a man after 1980” or “Are you a woman who has had sexual intercourse with a man who has had sexual intercourse with another man since 1980” (this was a blood drive at my college where majority of the students werent Alive in 1980.) I donated all the time back when I was a virgin, because o- , but now I’m not allowed to. So a better question for this article is “Why won’t baby boomers let queer people donate blood, even though all the blood gets screened for HIV and aids anyway?” though, theres a lot of room for loopholes in the wording of it

[lazysekhmet]

This fucking matters. Bias in medicine is bias that should not exist. Fucking fix it.

[luidilovins]

This is disgusting

[the-fury-of-a-time-lord]

hey trans people can’t give blood either. was banned from a plasma place for having the nerve to show up and be trans. “we don’t serve you people”.

[optimysticals]

This is one of the reasons why it was painful for a LOT of Queer people after the Pulse shooting. We kept seeing messages calling for blood donations but so many of us can’t donate. We couldn’t even help our own community. 

[wuffying]

[yacchins]

FRIENDLY REMINDER!!

The proper abbreviation for “Japanese” is JPN, not “jap”. “Jap” is an ethnic slur that was used in World War II, and it stings a lot to see it even if we know if the person using it has no bad intentions and just is not informed. Please take care to use the proper abbreviation! And please correct anyone you see using the incorrect abbreviation! Thank you!

[nigenaide]

acceptable: JPN, JA, JP

not acceptable: Jap

DO NOT DO THE THING.

[expectogladiolus]

Reblogging because I know that for a few of my followers, English is not their first language and they may perhaps not know this. It’s important not to be ignorant.

[sashasoda]

Okay I litteraly didn’t know that as a non native English speaker and it made a huge difference !

[oscarwildeboytoy-deactivated201]

Hey, unpopular opinion, apparently. But people don’t just “have pain for no reason” doctors say this all the time (especially to women and chronically ill people) and the truth is, Thats literally not possible. Even if your pains are psychosomatic (a word I hesitate to even use because of the way its used so often) there is a reason you are having those pains whether its mental illness, abuse, etc. If your doctor consistently tells you that “well some people just have pain for no reason” get a new doctor. That’s a doctor who is not going to give a shit what your actual symptoms or experiences are.

[kamorth]

I just wanna add to clarify the psychosomatic thing.

That word DOES NOT MEAN you’re making it up. It doesn’t mean you’re imagining the symptom. What it means is that the symptom ISN’T DIRECTLY CAUSED BY ANY OF THE THINGS THAT WOULD NORMALLY CAUSE IT.

I fought to get a PCOS diagnosis for 2 and a half years. For the ENTIRE time I was fighting, I was dealing with 3 cysts that were not going away by themselves and eventually required surgery to remove. At one point close to the end of the battle, I suddenly went blind. I was visiting my parents and was standing on the veranda looking out over the tree we had planted in memory of my dog and suddenly I got one of the shooting pains that I was quite frankly used to at that point and my vision started to go dark. It was like the sun was setting while being completely hidden behind storm clouds but it was 2pm in the middle of Summer on a clear day. Within about 30 seconds I couldn’t see ANYTHING. I was 27 years old and I was screaming for my mother.

My mum raced me to her doctor (he was a 15 minute drive away as opposed to 45 minutes to the nearest hospital) and he quickly worked out that there was nothing wrong with my eyes and what had happened was totally unrelated to them. Then he said it was psychosomatic and I freaked out, yelling that I was NOT making this up and I definitely wasn’t imagining it. Very quickly he calmed me down and said he believed me and I had misunderstood. He explained that whatever was going on with my abdominal pains (he suggested PCOS which I hadn’t even heard of at that point) had been ignored for so long that my body was starting to do things other than the normal pain response to try to draw my attention to the problem. My sight going was my body basically jumping around in front of me going “HEY ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME HELLLOOOOOOO??????”

He gave me some prescription strength painkillers and my sight started to come back as soon as they started to kick in. About 45 minutes after it started I could see well enough to walk around without help and within a day and a half I was back to normal. On top of that I finally had a scan booked to figure out what the hell was causing all the pain.

Psychosomatic symptoms are NOT imagined or fabricated or happening for “no reason”. Experiencing them DOES NOT make you a liar. It makes you someone who has been battling with something serious for so long that your own body has started to get impatient with you.

[oscarwildeboytoy-deactivated201]

I completely agree. Thank you for sharing this.

[jvedi-blog]

fashionably late? more like anxiously early

[queerlittlecreature-deactivated]

I will get to class 20 mins early and still be anxious

[iamwomanking]

Because no one else is there yet & is this the right place?? are you here the wrong day??

[proudnb]

You have not failed your parent(s) for being nonbinary.

You are a beautiful and unique individual, and being nonbinary only adds to the amazing experience that is you.

And if they (or anyone) made you feel less for being you, then they are the ones who have failed. They failed you, not the other way around.

[drowning-sunrise]

“Someone else has it worse, don’t worry about me.”

You know what? You’re right. Somebody out there definitely has it worse. Their illness is more debilitating. Their life has had suffering in it that you can’t begin to imagine. They’re in agony. They undoubtedly, incontestably, have it worse. 

But don’t think about them. 

Imagine that someone you love, a sibling, a parent, a friend, or even a pet, was experiencing just half of the pain that you are. Just half. 

Now try and convince me that you wouldn’t drive them to every doctor in that field, no matter how far away. Tell me that you wouldn’t spend hours online poring over articles and forums in an attempt to find something that would make them better. Say that you wouldn’t do everything in your power to make sure that they were as comfortable as possible at all times. Because I know you would. You’d take care of them, because it’s not a measure of how much pain they’re in, it’s that they’re in pain at all. 

Treat yourself with the same kindness. Someone has it worse. Someone has it better. And then there’s you. You deserve all of the love and effort that you would undoubtedly give others. I promise. You’re sick enough. You’re in enough pain. You deserve help. 

[quiet-reassurance]

Listen I’m happy that Taylor Swift is being supported as an abuse survivor trying to stand up for herself, but it’s getting really hard to swallow right now as so many other abuse survivors doing similar things are blatantly ignored in favor of Taylor

[quiet-reassurance]

God especially since Taylor is a “picture perfect” survivor. She is a beautiful young white woman, sure, but more importantly, she’s taking her abuser to court. She’s open about her experience. She makes a music video in which she shows up in bright red lipstick, done up and beautiful and self assured.

Support survivors who aren’t beautiful. Support survivors who can’t take their abuser to court. Support survivors who can’t escape their abuse. Support survivors whose anger isn’t pretty. Support survivors who don’t talk about it.

Support survivors who don’t fit your definition of what a survivor “should” be.

[quiet-reassurance]

Reblog this if you claim to give a shit about abuse survivors.

Show us you care about us, not about our music videos.

God knows we need to hear it.

[absentzindagi]

“ The Rise Of Our Women Is The Rise Of Our Nation.”

[73284931243297324]

“100 Reasons (Why I’m Not Out To My Family)” pt. 2

(in which members of the lgbtq community speak out about why they’re not open about their sexuality with their families.)

poster series

Shari Heck, 2014.

[airagorncharda]

The notions that LGBT people MUST be out or else they don’t respect themselves, or they’re harboring internalized homophobia, or they’re not being TRUE to themselves are SO harmful and SO problematic because there are people like this in situations where the choice between staying in the closet and coming out is often the choice between safety and very real danger.

[badsciencejokes]

…I almost killed myself

I put on my sunglasses, to hide my swollen eyes, over my tears. I cried all my makeup off. Went inside to have a milkshake. I don’t know why. I wanted something to drink as I figured out what I would do. I got a soda and a milkshake. Medium. The cashier looked at me and with a line around the corner of the counter he rushed away from the counter “Hold on “ he yelled to a coworker.

I filled my soda and went back and saw him looking all over. I go up and he gets close and says “I made it a large”.

That was seriously enough for me not to do it. His kindness. Someone went out of their way and as I went back in my car to cry I realized I could muster through a few other days. A few more weeks. Then I came down from that panicky high of anxiety, depression, and pain. I finished my shake. And it was enough time to let me feel better. I… I’m alive. I’ll make it through.

Try and be nice today. Tomorrow. Something as much as a smile. It helped so much.

Thank you man at McDonalds.

The milkshake saved my life

[blackheartseverywhere]

I hope you all can read this and remember to be kind

[the-quiet-priestess]

The smallest of gestures can save a life. My Mum answered her phone when I called and I am alive today because of that.

[badsciencejokes]

I’m glad you’re here.

It’s a phone call, a milkshake, a friend.

[badsciencejokes]

I feel like I shouldn’t keep reblogging this but when I do more people see what kindness can do…. I don’t know. Love everyone as yourself.

[nunyabizni]

Nah, keep rebloging it. It gives hope.

[purplespaladin]

I once accidentally texted the wrong person, because their names were right next to each other in my phone contacts, and the girl I accidentally texted was apparently about to commit suicide. She answered my text because she didn’t want to end it with something left undone. I didn’t know that at the time. I also usually tell people when I accidentally text the wrong number, but I didn’t that time for whatever reason. After that, every time she considered, she ended up texting me for a while, until she and my best friend at the time started dating, at which time she texted him instead.

They’re now married, with a beautiful four year old son and a daughter who is due within the next 4 days.

The things that keep us alive… they’re so small. Milkshakes, phonecalls, and wrong numbers…

[badsciencejokes]

OMG. @purplespaladin– this gave me 5 milkshakes. Wow…. Thank you.

[notesforselflove]

Today is a new day.

Take a deep breath

Stretch 

Open your eyes

And start the day.

Whether you stay in bed or get dressed, you are breathing and alive and I am so proud of you.

[arwenundomielarchive-deactivate]

katy perry kissed a 19 year old american idol contestant without his consent during an audition. he was uncomfortable and had been saving his first kiss for somebody special. please don’t let this be ignored just because the victim is male.

[crazy-pages]

If you’re having trouble pushing past sexist socialization to see just how creepy this is, imagine if a 33 year old guy did this to a 19 year old girl who was auditioning.