This mild Wikipedia sentence is like the understatement of all time
Here are some crazy grasshopper mouse facts for those who are not familiar with the most badass mouse species on the planet
- They are primarily carnivorous, and their diet is made up of not only bugs but also snakes, lizards and other mice.
- They hunt like true predators, slowly stalking and creeping up on their prey before ambushing them. They will sometimes let out a screech as they attack.
- Like wolves, they howl to establish territory and have a specially developed throat to produce louder vocalizations. They will stand up on their hind legs and throw their head back to howl- a sound that can be heard from 100 meters away!
- Grasshopper mouse behavior is linked to lunar cycles and they are more active during a full moon.
- These mice have been hunting bark scorpions and evolving alongside them for so long that they’ve evolved a mutation where scorpion venom that is lethal to other animals is converted into a painkiller in the grasshopper mouse’s body.
No tech CEO or NYT bestselling novelist will ever match the creativity of a humble French postman who decided on a whim to spend thirty-three years building a surreal, majestic palace with the bricks and mortar of his dreams.
1. Ferdinand Cheval tripped over a stone and was inspired by its shape, eventually stating, "It represents a sculpture so strange that it is impossible for man to imitate, it represents any kind of animal, any kind of caricature. I said to myself: since Nature is willing to do the sculpture, I will do the masonry and the architecture."
Here's the tripped-over sandstone in question, which explains some of the abstract design:
Nature really went off with sperm whales. A 70-ton predator with teeth the size of a banana but it only eats squishy prey that it doesn’t even chew, it just schlorps them down whole like a vacuum cleaner. Big giant fat head full of goop. Tiniest fins in the world. Strong enough to smash a ship to pieces and smart enough to figure out how to do so but its first line of defense is just to shit everywhere. Possibly the most complex language in the animal kingdom and it creates sounds by blowing air through its internal right nostril (it uses the left one to breathe) into its giant fat head. It’s the loudest animal on the planet and might have the capability to create a beam of sound so loud it can shake your organs apart but they don’t seem to use that to hunt or fight. They’re highly flammable. We used them to make candles.
For a groundbreaking investigation, retired navy commander Joseph Dituri was required to submerge himself for more than three months. Researchers sought to understand the impact of submerged life in a pressurised environment on the human body. And guess what? After spending more than three months submerged in the Atlantic Ocean, scientists were astounded to discover that Dituri had become “ten years younger” when he emerged from his little pod.
Following diagnostic evaluations, it was discovered that Dituri’s telomeres—the DNA caps at the ends of chromosomes that normally shorten with age—had grown 20% longer than they had three months prior.
In addition, his stem cell count had increased and his general health had undergone a dramatic metamorphosis. Dituri also reported better-quality sleep. His inflammatory indicators decreased by half, and his cholesterol plummeted by 72 points. According to medical professionals, the underwater pressure—which is recognized to have several health benefits—caused these alterations. Dituri subsequently discussed the need for these kinds of encounters.
“One of these locations that are isolated from outside activities is what you need. The British newspaper Daily Mirror cited him as stating, “Send people down here for a two-week vacation, where they can get their feet scrubbed, relax, and experience the benefit of hyperbaric medicine.” He said that his metabolism had also significantly improved.
I'm so frustrated by the lack of response to the mass psychogenic illness of law enforcement officials claiming to suffer contact fentanyl poisoning. There were a few studies done that quietly concluded that it's not real, none of the cases were credible, and the symptoms most closely resemble a panic attack or somatic episode.
No one is connecting this to systemic issues in police training and culture and no one is treating this as the canary in the coal mine it is.
Modern police training is functionally cult indoctrination, and intentionally cultivates paranoia. Police learn that everyone is out to get them, danger lurks around every corner, and their only job is to make it home alive after their shift.
They then enter the body of police culture, where questioning the bad behavior of fellow officers is at best strictly socially punished and at worst can get them killed, where they are constantly vigilant to say the right things and portray the right beliefs.
Suddenly, after generations of mainstream culture being generally supportive of police, in the midst of an anxiety-riddled pandemic, there is a highly-publicized backlash against law enforcement. Regular people are saying ACAB, calling cops fascists and murderers and wife-beaters. They're posting officers' service records on social media. Police, unwilling to believe they are evil, experience a cognitive dissonance backlash effect and cling to beliefs that contradict reality.
No one should be shocked - and no one should be hesitant to say - that there is a mental health crisis in law enforcement. They are paranoid, hyper-vigilant, and mired in cognitive dissonance. They have guns and virtually unchecked power to enact violence in their communities. Making up delusional stories about fentanyl is a pretty mild outcome compared to what we should be expecting from these circumstances.
Police aren't just bastards. They're a danger to themselves and others.
BTW, for anyone thinking this is an old story, the reason I'm bringing it up now is that it is actively being used to justify denying books, mail, and other documents to people in prison. The entire state of Wisconsin just banned donated books.
Prison staff are having psychogenic episodes they blame on fentanyl, and the response from DOC administration has been to appease and legitimize this hysteria by restricting some of the few freedoms left to incarcerated people. Their reaction should be, "Holy shit, the most vulnerable population in our state is in the care of people who in the midst of a mental health crisis so sever it's causing mass delusions."
This was originally posted by L. E. Morgan.
It’s not as long as it looks (but it is long), it just have different dares according to each pet.
OK, here it is:
You want a pet, right? Well, first you need to work hard to buy one.
Write for one hour as you try and earn some money. How many words you wrote determines how much money you got. Round down to find out. 100 words = 1 penny, but 199 words still = 1 penny! (So if you wrote 4099, you’d have 40 pennies — just enough for a dragon!)
Now you have enough money, you hope. Choose from the options below to buy your pet, and do so! Bear in mind you can only buy one at this stage, and you can’t go in debt. What you got is what you got. While you’re going to get your pet, write 200 words .
Mouse: A mouse costs you one penny. Mice are kind of cute, right?
Rat: Rats are nice, but a bit bigger than mice. They cost two pennies. Also, write 10 words .
Rabbit: Three pennies for a rabbit. They are nice and quiet, aren’t they? They won’t make noises.
Toad: Toads just sit there and do nothing except croak and run away occasionally. They are three pennies.
Spider: It’d be less, but it’s a fairly rare spider, you know. Five pennies for a spider.
Cat: Cats are kinda nice; not too big. Five pennies to buy a cat.
Dog: Dogs require more space, right? Write 25 words to check you have enough. Dogs are six pennies.
Fox: Foxes have lovely bushy tails. They’re six pennies, and fairly low-maintenance.
Owl: Owls can fly, meaning that they are special. Eight pennies an owl!
Parrot: Parrots can fly and talk. Parrots are nine pennies.
Kangaroo: These eleven penny beauties are native to Australia. Are you? If you are not born in Australia, write for five minutes as they ship your kangaroo over. If you are now in Australia, but haven’t been born there, write for two minutes . An Australian native, who’s still in Australia, must write 30 words .
Unicorn: Now we’re talking! You’d better have been a fast writer to write enough for the wonderful Unicorn. Each unicorn is thirty-five pennies.
Dragon: Dragons are great. They breathe fire. If you’re such a pyromaniac as to want them, write 50 words to fire-proof your house, and pay the required forty pennies.
Can’t buy a pet? Write 40 words . Then, do a word war for fifteen minutes with someone else doing the crawl who’s bought a pet. The winner takes half the loser’s pennies, rounded down (7 pennies means winner gets 3 and loser 4). Now start this step again. If you can’t still buy a pet (ie you wrote less than 100 words originally then lost the war), start again.
Now that you’ve obtained your pet, it’s time to find it a cage! Everything except dragons, unicorns and dogs need a small cage; these three require large cages. For them, double the word counts required, and the times as well.
Write 500 words in fifteen minutes as you search for a cage.
If you succeeded: Yay! You found a cage the very first shop you looked. Write for twenty minutes as you take it home to your pet.
If you failed: You can’t find a cage. Either try again, or make your own. Write 300 words as you do this. If it took you more than 10 minutes, write another 300 words .
All right. Everything set… right?
…wrong. Your pet requires food, remember?
Write 30 words as you go to the pet food shop. Now, while looking at all those foods, write 400 words in ten minutes as you figure out which is the best.
If you succeeded: You ask someone to help. You promptly buy the best (and cheapest) of the foods. It is Good4Pets . You thank them by giving them one penny.
If you failed: You aren’t sure what to buy. Use two pennies to purchase pet food (if you have not got two pennies, you must earn some money — write for fifteen minutes and then calculate how many pennies you have. But there’s a snag. You’ll only get half the pennies you did last time. So, on writing 400, you would obtain the two pennies you need.)
Also, write for twenty minutes as you decide. In the end, you buy Higgins’ Yummy Pet Food .
Now you get home. Write for five minutes as you play with your pet and start to bond with them.
Food time! You read the instructions on the label, and give your pet a certain amount of food.
If you purchased Good4Pets : Your pet loves this! They really want more. However, you refuse to give them any more until you have written 200 words . If you don’t do this in under five minutes , your pet becomes ill.
If you purchased Higgins’ Yummy Pet Food : Your pet turns up their nose at it. If they’re a Spider, they bite you. Write for five minutes as you try to stop the pain. Then you must convince your pet to eat it, writing for one minute as you do so. If you write more than 30 words , they finally start eating. If not, they fall ill.
Is your pet ill? If so, don’t skip this step!
If you managed to give them a good amount of food, they’re in the pink of health. Skip this step.
It’s vet time! Select your pet to find out what happens at the vet — or even if you get there.
Cat: Cat is not liking this. Poor dear thing. But you only take five minutes of writing and one penny of treats to convince them to — if you wrote at least 50 words in that five minutes . If not, no vet. (you have to provide one penny).
Mouse: Mouse is running everywhere. You write for ten minutes in an attempt to catch them. However, if you didn’t write 100 words in that time, you can’t catch them. Although you acquire one penny by not taking them to the vet, your mouse is soon worse. Poor little thing.
Rabbit: It’s nice and easy, if you’re quick enough, to take Rabbit to the vet. Write 40 words in two minutes as you attempt to catch them . If that worked, write for five minutes on your way to the vet. If it didn’t, write 100 words in consternation as you monitor your rabbit’s health.
Dog: Dog is big and friendly. It only takes three minutes of writing to get it into your car. If you didn’t get at least 100 words , the dog doesn’t go into the car, and you can’t vet it.
Rat: Small, mean things, rats are. This rat manages to look cute enough that you leave a small place for it to escape… f ix up an obvious, easy plothole to fix, then write 200 words in five minutes to take them to the vet. Once again, like everything else, if you fail, you can’t take ‘em.
Fox: Rusty red fox… turns out his teeth are kind of sharp. Bandage the wound you recieved with one penny worth of bandages. Don’t have one penny? Can’t go to the vet. To obtain this required money (or if you just want another penny) write 20 words in one minute . Repeat this until you can do it.
Toad: Your cute little toad gets lost in the car. You’re late for your appointment. Oops. Write 250 words in five minutes to convince them to be nice and give you one.
Owl: Owl flies all over the car. Woohoo. If you can write 100 words in five minutes , including an animal therein, you manage to cage it and take it to the vet.
Parrot: Parrots are beautiful. However, on your way to the vet it gets scared and, well, your car’s kind of dirty. Clean it up by writing 500 words in fifteen minutes or you miss your appointment.
Kangaroo: Ah, the smells of eucalyptus leaves! Write for five minutes and include some smell while you attempt to catch this bounding creature. If you made over 100 words , you catch it. If not, you don’t. While going to the vet (or staying at home disconsolate) write 100 words.
Spider: Write 200 words in ten minutes while you catch them. Can’t do it? Can’t go to the vet.
Unicorn: Unicorn has a sharp horn. Ouch. Write for five minutes as you bandage yourself up. Then, word war for fifteen minutes with somebody. The winner was able to take their animal to the vet. The loser couldn’t. (Let me suggest, you who lost, to try against someone else next time, you can do this )
Dragon: Oops. Why on earth did you get a dragon?! Write 1000 words in twenty-five minutes or get scorched and give up!
Running out of money, huh? Not surprising. So, you go to work for one hour . Then, using the original key, work out how many pennies you have.
If you obtained over 30: Great, take another two extra. The boss is pleased.
If you obtained under 30, but over 3: That’s nice. Take one penny extra!
If you obtained under 3: Oh dear. Take a break for ten minutes before repeating this step.
Did your pet make it to the vet? If the answer is yes, write 300 words in relief. If the answer is no, write 200 words and then go back to the vet (two steps earlier). However, you must skip the penny-making step — it’s not fair that just because you didn’t do this that you obtain more pennies. (Note that this has the potential for a never-ending cycle. If this happens again, just finish off on this step. In other words, if on your second try you fail to take them to the pet, your animal has died .)
Now that your pet is all healthy again, it’s time to be thinking about your dear pet’s name. You’ve already got one, right? Yes? Or no? If you already have one, write 50 words extolling the beauty and fittingness of its name. But if you don’t have a name for your pet, pick one by writing 100 words in discussion of what the name should be.
If your pet’s name is more than 5 characters, and for every special character (e.g. a space, full stop, number etc.) please write 100 words . If you have a dragon or a unicorn, they need impressive names, and so you must write 30 words extra .
If your pet’s name is shorter than that, you ought to write 50 words while you try and teach it its name.
Poor thing. You think it’s lonely. Bond (write) for 15 minutes . If you managed to get 400 words , that’s great! Your pet’s bonded beautifully. If not, try again twice more. (If after three attempts total you cannot write 400 words in 15 minutes, halve the number of words. If this still does not work, your pet does not bond with you. You must immediately pay five pennies to pay someone to be its friend. Don’t have five pennies? Your poor little pet is very lonely, and you must take it to the vet again, going to the ‘vet’ step.)
Oh, boy, these animals! They require food all the time, don’t they?! Find your pet to find how much they need.
If you purchased Good4Pets, the animal likes it. It only takes 100 words in five minutes to convince them to eat. Repeat until you get it.
If you purchased Higgins’ Yummy Pet Food, the pet is ill. However, you can nurse them through with a hasty 400 words in fifteen minutes. Then, as they recuperate, write their number (see second step) times 100 of words .
But food isn’t all. More bills are starting to come in, and unless you want to pay 5 pennies for the food bill, it’s down to working! Write 20 words in one minute or pay the pennies. No pennies? Write 30 words in two minutes . If you cannot write this, your pet has died .
Work, work, work. Write for one hour as you try to earn some more money. Use the original key to determine how much money you obtain.
If you obtained 50+: Hide it. If, however, you’re willing to give all your pennies away just for the next step, you may double the number of pennies you have. Sure you want no pennies next step? Might be risky…
If you obtained between 30 and 50: A friend in hard straits asks you for some money. You are delighted to give them 3 pennies.
If you obtained between 10 and 30: You’re still quite rich. You put this money in the bank, and earn 1 penny interest.
If you obtained between 5 and 10: Don’t bank it. You might lose out on it. Instead, hide it. If, however, you’re willing to give all those pennies you just got away just for the next step, you may double the number of pennies you have.
If you obtained between 2 and 5: Your pet looks kind of underfed (it’s not, but it looks it). Your kind-hearted friend offers to let you earn 10 pennies by writing 40 words in ten minutes, or else, if you can’t do that, to give you 5 pennies instead.
If you obtained 0 or 1 penny: You’re given a job in the binary department, paying you 2 pennies.
It’s that time of year again. Time to get out the holiday decorations! However, that lovely pet is getting in the way a bit. Keep him/her around, getting in the way, or send them to the petsitter?
If you kept them around: The job that you were doing would’ve taken a lot less time without them there. Sprint for five minutes as you attempt to make up the time. Next, they knock something glass off. Clean the glass up for five minutes and write no less than 100 words, or else pay one penny. No pennies to pay/don’t want to pay them? You are annoyed with your animal, and to prove it, ignore it for a short while, in fact twenty minutes, during which you angrily write 500 words about the stupidity of your pet. Can’t write that much? Pay two pennies. If you don’t have two pennies to pay, and can’t write 200 words in fifteen minutes, your pet has died.
If you sent them to the pet-sitter: Ahh, peace and quiet. Especially from the rattling of your wallet. You have to pay 4 pennies for the pet-sitter, and if you can’t afford it, you must keep them around. But if you can, ahh, peace and quiet… While enjoying this, write 200 contented and peaceful words.
Feed me! Write 500 words as your pet now requires some more food.
Earn 4 pennies by writing 400 words in fifteen minutes. If you can’t, well, that’s fine, but have a crack at it. Every penny counts, you know!
Your pet is getting a tiny bit neglected here. Write for 5 minutes as you spend quality time with the poor thing.
Your friend wants to know how your pet is going. However, the form of communication you are using charges for every letter. Write as many words as there are in your pet’s name and species x 10. (For example, ‘Hoppy, toad’ would be 90 words as you do not include punctuation or spaces, unless it is part of the pet’s actual name, like Mrs. Hoppy (total 10 letters)
You want a photograph of your pet. So beautiful! If your pet is a colour,
write that number of words for its colour
. If it’s more than one colour (e.g. striped) add the numbers together:
Green: 10
Blue: 11
Yellow: 16
Purple: 50
Red: 40
Orange: 70
White: 100
Black: 2
A mixture of all of them: 250
Not mentioned: 200
You want lots of little animals, huh? Well, is your pet a boy or a girl?
Boy: Write 50 words.
Girl: Write 50 words.
Don’t know: Write 100 words, and decide!
So… find your dear pet a friend. If you have to find a male animal, write 200 words in 5 minutes. If you have to find a female animal, write 100 words in 2 minutes 30 seconds. If you fail with either… sorry… you didn’t find a mate for your pet. They’re lonely! Write 300 words in 10 minutes as you console your pet, and try again.
Didn’t make it a second time? Pet is ill. Sorry… go back to the vet step, and lose half your pennies.
Yay, they’ve got a friend!! … However you must buy said friend. Write for one hour to earn the pennies required. Regretting your dragonish choice, huh?
Mouse: one penny
Rat: two pennies
Rabbit: three pennies
Toad: three pennies
Spider: five pennies
Cat: five pennies
Dog: six pennies
Fox: six pennies
Owl: eight pennies
Parrot: nine pennies
Kangaroo: eleven pennies
Unicorn: thirty-five pennies
Dragon: forty pennies
Not enough pennies to buy your animal? Write 1000 words and repeat this step. If you need to, however, once you have enough to buy your pet you must lose all your pennies except two, however many you’d just had (ie if you had thirty nine and needed forty, and made it up to a total of eighty-three, you’d effectively be paying 81 for your 40-penny-worth dragon)
Give your pet’s mate a name and colour (gender and species are obvious, given that one is the opposite, the other the same, as your original pet)
Your female pet is looking fatter than before. Seems it worked. While you wait for her to give birth, write for 5 minutes. Entertain the male by taking him for a walk while you write 50 words, and buying him one penny worth of animal treats. If the male was your original pet, write 250 words in five minutes. Failed? All your pets have died.
How many children does she have? No need for names, just numbers. Write 10 times the number of children in the litter. (ie if there were 10 in the litter, write 100 words) Then, write 100 words in 2:30 for each one. Each time you fail, one of them dies. Write 10 words for each baby animal that died.
None of the children survived? Sad, that is. Write 100 words to console your heartbroken pet, and go back to the step where you find your pet a friend.
Well… now there are little animals underfoot. Great! So cute! However, you trip over one of them and sprain your ankle. Ouch. This means that you have to be laid up for some days. At least you got some work done… as you wrote 250 words in five minutes.
If you managed to write that much: Great! Earn one penny and take a break for five minutes.
If you failed to do so: repeat the step. If you failed three times, it meant you neglected your pets shockingly. Not only did all the little ones die, but so did the mother. You now have one male pet. If the female was your original pet, you give away the male in a burst of anger against yourself. You now have no pets. Otherwise, just keep him.
It’s come to that time… your little ones must be sold.
How many did you sell? Take five pennies for each one you sold, and write 200 words per animal sold as you watch them go.
Did you keep one for yourself? If so, name it and give it a colour and gender. Someone donates five pennies to help with your costs.
(No little ones? None survived the last two steps? My heart bleeds. Give away the friend you bought for your pet, and repeat from the step where you find a friend. Take three pennies as you have saved on food.)
Feeding time… you may have one, you may have two, you may have three pets.
If you have under 2 pennies: You can give one penny to feed your animal/s, but that mightn’t be very good if your finances are low. Instead, go to work and write for fifteen minutes to pay for the food. Also take one penny for your work.
If you have over 2, and under 5 pennies: Write 700 words plus 5 words per pet and give one penny.
If you have over 5, and under 10 pennies: Use two pennies and write 650 words.
If you have over 10, and under 20 pennies: Write 600 words to feed your pet/s. Use two pennies.
If you have over 20 pennies: Write 500 words as you feed them. Use two pennies to do so.
Show time! D’you want to show them?
Yes: Pay one penny per pet you want to show (if you have three, you could merely show one, or two, or all three, but for each you do not want to show, go to the ‘no’ down below). Repeat the rest of the step for each one. Word war for five minutes with someone. If you win, you place. (If you lose, you don’t.) Did you get first, second, third, fourth or fifth? Write for fifteen minutes. If you got 750+, you came first. Take six pennies as prize money. If you got 600-750, you came second. Take five pennies. If you got 500-600, you came third. Take four pennies. If you got 300-500, you came fourth. Take three pennies. 0-300 came fifth. Take one penny, and write for five minutes as you prepare them for next time. However you came, write for a minute to work off your excitement.
No: Write 200 words and skip this step.
Was showing fun? Or didn’t you do it? Write 500 words in ten minutes, which will allow you to repeat the last step. Failed? Lose one penny and write the remainder + 200 words.
Write 500 words happily as you contemplate your pets.
Everyone wants holidays. Write 2000 words. Use as many of your pennies as you want to cut down the number and slack off. One penny removes 100 words. (ie using five pennies means you write 1500 words) You don’t have to use any pennies if you don’t want to.
You have to get benefits from having more pets. Take two pennies per pet you have.
Old age. The curse of kings and peasants alike. Your oldest pet (the one you got first, your original pet) is getting old. Write 300 words in five minutes as you distressingly watch them grow older. If you can’t, your pet has died.
How many pets have you? You are getting older too. Give away all your pets except your original pet, and take five pennies for each. Now, to fill your suddenly empty time, write the number of letters in all your past pets’ names times 10. (ie if you had Hoppy, Jumpy and their little child you decided to keep, Skippy, you’d have to write 150 words).
Old age sets in… go to the vet again. You don’t have to do everything after that, just do that and come back here.
Your pet is really quite old. Poor thing. As you debate whether to put it out of its misery or not, write 350 words in five minutes. If you fail, you decide to do so. Your pet has died. If you make it, the pet is better than before and seems quite happy.
Your pet is having a nap. You can’t waste the time. Therefore, find your challenge below!
Mouse: Do a five minute word war. The loser must pay the winner one penny. (No penny? Write 10 words in one minute!)
Rat: Write 500 words in fifteen minutes.
Rabbit: Write 550 words in fifteen minutes.
Toad: Word war with someone for ten minutes. The winner gains one penny. You must write a minimum of 200 words in that time to qualify.
Spider: Roll a 6-sided die and multiply this number by 100 to make the number of words you write. You must write this much in a maximum of fifteen minutes.
Cat: Roll a 12-sided die and multiply the number by 100. Write that many words in the number x 2.5 minutes.
Dog: Word war for fifteen minutes. Get a minimum of 500 words.
Fox: Write 600 words in fifteen minutes.
Owl: Do a Three Digit Challenge.
Parrot: Write 650 words in fifteen minutes.
Kangaroo: Bounce your way through your word count with 500 words in fourteen minutes.
Unicorn: #1k30min
Dragon: Write 3000 words in an hour.
If you fail any challenge twice, your pet has died.
You’ve had a lovely life with your pet. You knew it was the right thing to do, getting one. Write 500 words as you look back on the happy life your pet has given you. Now write 2000 words minus 100 words times the number of pennies you have, resulting in zero pennies. Write a poem about an animal, and put that somewhere in your story as thanks for your pet’s wonderful life.
New idea: a series of interconnected romance novels but each one is a slightly different subgenre.
It starts off with a typical historical. The widowed Earl of Ham-upon-Rye falls in love with the governess he hires to care for his children, or something.
The next one has some gothic flavor to it. The earl’s sister winds up in a castle with Mysterious Goings On and Ghostly Happenings but because it’s a genre romance she does end up happily married to the Marquess of Corsetstrings who no longer plays his violin in secret.
In the third one the Countess of Mittensby (she showed up in the first and second one because she’s the earl’s sister’s bestie) gets involved with a lesbian ghost. Happily and spookily ever after.
The fourth one is a Western and takes place in the United States and is all about, I don’t know, the Marquess of Corsetstrings’s youngest brother trying to pretend he’s not an English nobleman while he falls in love with a saloon girl, whatever that is
By the eighth one someone is time traveling to the future with werewolves
Instagram just served me a Netflix ad of a movie based on the book Uglies by Scott Westerfeld, which I've been obsessed with since middle school and I'm both so excited and already curbing my enthusiasm a little because based on the trailer, they did the lightest amount of commitment to the whole thing where the transformation is actually...transformational. Like they literally decided to go from "no makeup" makeup to high glam as the transformation. Instead of going with no makeup and shitty lighting. We know from the Derry Girls that TV is capable of aging people down and making them look immature & emphasize their least cute features, and then we see those same actors/actresses on the red carpet and they literally look like an alternate universe version of themselves.
I feel like they could've really played with the meta narrative of how much we literally transform people to get to a certain level/phase of growth/society, and also the slight bimboification effect that we're obviously also watching both happen and the resistance to it happen? Just a flattening of the conversation to entertainment and satisfaction and lightness. And also how prettiness is literally in the eye of the camera/beholder, by playing with that more. Showing the "real world" perhaps even with a completely different color palette than the Pretty moments. But instead they chose to prioritize the presentation/appearance of pretty culture, which is kind of the whole thing the book is trying to critique.
I'm still gonna watch this because I'm obsessed with the books and committed but also I'm braced for disappointment :/ because if they can't even that that part right (the visual interpretation), I'm not convinced they are gonna get the deeper themes and things I loved about the book series right either.
Also as I was writing this up I looked up the YouTube trailer and the comment section is basically this and versions of this so ... Possibly this is either the correct take or the absolute wrong one, I guess I'll find out
Ok to clarify, because I've been seeing people push back on the "the Uglies aren't ugly enough" critique
My v nuanced point isn't that they should be actually ugly (none of the actors from Derry Girls are ugly IRL), but that they perceive themselves as ugly, and the camera has the ability to make that perception true.
Like think about how people have body image issues where their every flaw is magnified and they literally can't see that they're beautiful/what their beautiful attributes are. People with ED who literally see themselves as "fat" even though it's not objectively true. Teen girls who can literally only see the three pimples on their face and declare that they're "hideous." When Tally sees herself in the mirror, she sees herself as ugly, and the camera is a stand-in for the viewer to see Tally like she sees herself. And I think the emotional point of the story would resonate more deeply with watchers if they can see in themselves those tendencies, by having it play out on the big screen.
The point isn't that anyone is actually ugly, but that society can brainwash you into thinking you're ugly, and you'll believe it and see yourself that way, and then self-opt-in to surgery and etc.
And given the (spoiler) sitch, it would follow that Pretties literally see themselves as even prettier/extra shiny because of their (spoiler) and see the Uglies as extra dull/matte/ugly again because of (spoiler).
To clarify, all of it IS made up, and the perception of difference is exactly the point.
Instagram just served me a Netflix ad of a movie based on the book Uglies by Scott Westerfeld, which I've been obsessed with since middle school and I'm both so excited and already curbing my enthusiasm a little because based on the trailer, they did the lightest amount of commitment to the whole thing where the transformation is actually...transformational. Like they literally decided to go from "no makeup" makeup to high glam as the transformation. Instead of going with no makeup and shitty lighting. We know from the Derry Girls that TV is capable of aging people down and making them look immature & emphasize their least cute features, and then we see those same actors/actresses on the red carpet and they literally look like an alternate universe version of themselves.
I feel like they could've really played with the meta narrative of how much we literally transform people to get to a certain level/phase of growth/society, and also the slight bimboification effect that we're obviously also watching both happen and the resistance to it happen? Just a flattening of the conversation to entertainment and satisfaction and lightness. And also how prettiness is literally in the eye of the camera/beholder, by playing with that more. Showing the "real world" perhaps even with a completely different color palette than the Pretty moments. But instead they chose to prioritize the presentation/appearance of pretty culture, which is kind of the whole thing the book is trying to critique.
I'm still gonna watch this because I'm obsessed with the books and committed but also I'm braced for disappointment :/ because if they can't even that that part right (the visual interpretation), I'm not convinced they are gonna get the deeper themes and things I loved about the book series right either.
Also as I was writing this up I looked up the YouTube trailer and the comment section is basically this and versions of this so ... Possibly this is either the correct take or the absolute wrong one, I guess I'll find out
Today, Jun 22nd on her birthday, Pasadena (CA) proclaims Octavia E. Butler Day.
June 17, 2024: Proclamation - Octavia E. Butler Day -- June 17, 2024 From the Mayor's Desk
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Whereas, born in Pasadena, California on June 22, 1947, Octavia E. Butler became one of the most celebrated science fiction writers of her time; and
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Whereas, a proud Pasadenan, Octavia spent her formative years in this City, attending Pasadena City College and later transferring to California State University, Los Angeles where she honed her craft and developed her unique voice; and
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Whereas, her groundbreaking works—including “Kindred”, “Parable of the Sower”, and the “Patternist” series—have earned her critical acclaim, literary recognition including Hugo and Nebula Awards, and a lasting place in the literary canon; and
Whereas, Octavia Butler’s writing addressed important social issues, inspiring generations of readers and writers to think critically about the world and their place in it, and paved the way for diverse voices in literature—making her a beacon for aspiring writers, particularly those from underrepresented communities; and
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Whereas, today we recognize Octavia Butler’s pioneering spirit and important contributions to the field of literature, celebrate her enduring connection to Pasadena, and honor her lasting impact on our community and the world;
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Now, Therefore I, Victor M. Gordo, Mayor of the City of Pasadena, on behalf of the City Council, do hereby proclaim June 22, 2024 in Pasadena as Octavia E. Butler Day.
They met as children in the middle of the Sri Lankan civil war. Later, in a demon-haunted wood, an act of violence linked them and propelled their souls on a journey through the ages. As they reincarnate ever deeper into the future, a truth emerges: Some stories take more than one lifetime to tell.
Running Close to the Wind by @ariaste
In this queer pirate fantasy, Avra Helvaçi has accidentally stolen the single most expensive secret in the world. To avoid capture, he flees to the open sea, where only his on-again, off-again ex aka pirate Captain Teveri az-Ḥaffār can help him survive, profit, and become a legend.
Cuckoo by Gretchen Felker-Martin
Something evil is buried deep in the desert. It wants your body and wears your skin. Welcome to Camp Resolution, a queer conversion center where everyone leaves a different person. In 1995, seven queer teens were abandoned here by their parents, but survived. Sixteen years later, they’re scarred and broken, but back to face an evil that threatens the world.
Kinning by Nisi Shawl
In this alternate history where barkcloth airships soar and former colonies claim freedom from imperialist tyrants, the identity of the island of Everfair still wavers. Victorious in the wake of the Great War, a new threat looms. Can Everfair continue to serve as a symbol of hope for anticolonial movements around the world, or will it fall to forces within and without?
Can’t Spell Treason Without Tea by @rebeccathornewrites
Can one of the Queen’s private guard and the most powerful mage in existence leave their lives behind to settle down in their new bookshop that serves tea? This cozy fantasy is steeped in sapphic romance and nestled on the edge of dragon country.
The Fragile Threads of Power by V. E. Schwab
Once there were four worlds, nestled like pages in a book, each pulsing with fantastical power and connected by a single city: London. After a desperate attempt to prevent corruption and ruin in the four Londons, there are only three. Now the worlds are going to collide anew—brought to a dangerous precipice by the discoveries of three remarkable magicians.
Now available in paperback!
The Archive Undying by @emcandon
This is a story about misplaced faith, complicated love, so much self-loathing, and yeah—giant robots. Plugged into his AI god when its apocalyptic corruption renders him unfortunately immortal, sad gay disaster Sunai takes a die-again-or-die-trying approach to things. Unending life’s tough when intimacy is somehow scarier even than either of the warring police states set on turning you into a weapon or the rogue undead mecha-fragment of your old god that wants to eat you.
Now available in paperback!
The Bell in the Fog by Lev AC Rosen
A dazzling historical mystery that dives into the shadowy, closeted world of the Navy, emerging in the gay bars of the city. It’s a whirlpool of missing people, violent strangers, and scandalous photos in 1952 San Francisco.
Now available in paperback!
Celebrate Pride with more titles from Tor Publishing Group here!
i was on NPR talking about Autism shit two weeks ago, and i have the book sales figures from that week and that national media appearance had.... absolutely zero relationship to sales. on the typical week these days, 1,400 to 1,500 copies of Unmasking Autism will sell. The week that I was on NPR there was a slight dip; only about 1,300 books were sold.
i have done a lot of press for my books. For Laziness Does Not Exist I did easily a 100 damn podcasts and radio shows and newspapers and excerpts in magazines. none of it corresponded to a noticeable bump in sales. the biggest "get" my publicist found for my latest book was the Glennon Doyle show, a booking she and her team celebrated and then spent months clamboring excitedly for... it, too, had no obvious relationship to sales.
Unmasking Autism became a bestseller because some other guy made a tiktok about it, and then a bunch of tiktokkers made videos about it too. all on their own. without any prodding from me, or any relationship to me. it was completely organic, passionate, and sincere, and rooted in the book's true merits and usefulness to other people, and that's why it inspired lots of sales. and continues to more than a year and a half later. all the press I did for Unmasking Autism prior to the release of that tiktok did relatively far less. NPR, Goop, the LA Times, Lit Hub, Jacobin, Huffpo, the New York Times, the Financial Times, MSNBC, Business Insider. Didn't matter. at least not much. so why do i bother?
publishers really ride your ass trying to make you give lots of interviews and show up for lots of events but it's all based on the worship of traditional media and magical thinking that it will somehow convert listeners into buyers. and that's just not how it works. the truth is 95% of books never sell more than 5,000 copies, and most people don't buy books or read them. i love reading but i dont think this is itself some terrible loss, as most books are padded-out commodities made for sale more than a work of true artistic passion or scholarly merit, and sometimes listening to a 90 minute interview with an author tells you the bulk of what you need to know.
it's freeing to know that the effort i put into getting my books out into the world have almost zero relationship to the books' success. marketing just does not work. it's a relief. unmasking autism did fabulously because it's actually both good and useful. laziness has had a long life span because it speaks to real problems in people's lives and gives them a message they are desperate to hear. but no amount of thirsty ass online shilling will make somebody realize that and it's maddening to try. you just gotta focus on doing good work, work that you enjoy making or need to make and that you feel good about, let things flop if theyre gonna flop, and keep on living your life.
which is all good news because i really do hate a lot of these fucking interviews. how can i stomach being on npr or in the atlantic or whatever these days given how complicit nearly all major media outlets are in justifying this genocide. like who fuckin cares about them, who wants their approval. who needs it. it's of no value
I've had this little idea in my head for a while now, so I decided to sit down and plot it out.
Disclaimer: This isn't meant to be some sort of One-Worksheet-Fits-All situation. This is meant to be a visual representation of some type of story planning you could be doing in order to develop a plot!
Lay down groundwork! (Backstory integral to the beginning of your story.) Build hinges. (Events that hinge on other events and fall down like dominoes) Suspend structures. (Withhold just enough information to make the reader curious, and keep them guessing.)
And hey, is this helps... maybe sit down and write a story! :)
