srahpls

Sarah | 38 | Aotearoa/New Zealand

[homoboreanaz]

hayley atwell for the guardian

[greater-than-the-sword]

Real talk girls get asked this question repeatedly from the age of about seven. It’s also phrased as “if you could change one thing about your appearance, what would it be?”

STOP. ASKING. Stop asking stop asking stop asking.

[greater-than-the-sword]

Nope gosh dang it I have more to say. Why are girls expected to answer this question like it’s “what’s your favorite color” or something innocuous? Why is this even remotely okay? This is in quizzes, girl’s diaries + activity books, magazines, party games, and school reflections. How is that okay? Why are girls expected to have an answer to this question? Why is it supposed to be normal to decide that you hate a part of your body? Why are we teaching children this?

[nhod]

[1dietcokeinacan]

Me n my mutuals watching it all unfold……….

[faggottt]

Whatching what unfold?

[nevercure]

If you aren’t watching it all unfold, you must be what’s unfolding

[without-ado]

invitation from winter l LokiHighlock

[tokyoproxy]

Martine Lambrechts

[lionfloss]

by Samantha Cavet

[wedding-shemp]

Also rules that Tumblr had the exact same problem that Twitter is currently dealing with (website too wretched to attract advertisers) and came up with the exact same solution as Twitter-ie sell functionally meaningless little upgrades- and Tumblr succeeded where Twitter didn't because Tumblr successfully tapped into its user base's desire to be obnoxious

[wedding-shemp]

Like Tumblr introduced sponsored posts YEARS after every other website but it was a smash hit because they pitched it as "for five dollars we will make everyone look at your post whether they like it or not" and it did so well that people actually started buying the premium subscriptions because we all collectively agreed that we HAVE to financially support a website that lets you pay to annoy strangers

[wedding-shemp]

Just an entire ecosystem built around new and novel ways to bother other people. I'm never ever leaving

[ralfmaximus]

Tumblr launching its blue checkmark thing while twitter’s blue checkmark thing is burning out of control demonstrates superb comedic timing. My god I want to kiss every single one of @staff​ on the forehead for this.

[simonalkenmayer]

This is how we used to make down hearth cakes, except we’d use a pit overturned on the hearth.

[party-gilmore]

"THE WISH.COM VERSION OF MYTHBUSTERS" IM LOSING IT

[patrocles]

no you dont understand, i’m obsessed with him

no you dont understand i’m obsessed with him

[dickslapthestate]

ngl, this song slaps way harder than it has any earthly right to

[ms-demeanor]

My friends, here is his bandcamp. His album Artificial Intelligence includes this song, aka H.Y.C.Y.BH

[srahpls]

Anyway while I'm back on a very slow tumblr roll lemme introduce you to Princess Nacho.

Her full name is Princess Nacho Sparkle and yes my six year old did name her.

[valentinedagger]

nobody bitch about the tumblr checkmark this is the funniest shit staff has pulled in months and its absolutely contributing to the landlord-firing-gunshots-at-passing-cars vibe of the past week

[eldenturtle]

Tumblr is collectively doing this thing where we’re an old woman in the village minding our business and making our soup but the new gentrified neighbors want to come over and see if we’re interested in starting a Home Owner’s Association and so now we gotta pretend to be a crazy old lady who does devil sacraments and maybe will come to stand in front of their house at night and stare in their windows if they talk to us.

[cyberpriestess]

you say that like we didn't before - it's soup by day, sacrament by night

[joasakura]

A granny in the sheets, Baba Yaga in the streets

[srahpls]

Coming back to Tumblr after being on hiatus for five years cos Twitter is burning like

[srahpls]

Shit I better carve out some time to update my theme and youse on like...my entire life? MY KID IS SIX BROSEFS.

[srahpls]

ok ok like give me the weekend to get used to this interface again I may be nearly forty but I'm a goddamn elder millennial I can do ANYTHING

[srahpls]

Coming back to Tumblr after being on hiatus for five years cos Twitter is burning like

[srahpls]

Shit I better carve out some time to update my theme and youse on like...my entire life? MY KID IS SIX BROSEFS.

[srahpls]

Coming back to Tumblr after being on hiatus for five years cos Twitter is burning like

[disease-danger-darkness-silence]

7-year-olds and Christmas

My family is not Christian. I don’t personally celebrate Christmas much, because I hate how the holiday has just fucking OVERTAKEN the latter half of the year. I’m a fucking Grinch.

THAT SAID, the only people who usually get an actual Christmas present from me are kids. Specifically, seven-year-old niece, Madison.

Now, we are all fucking poor right now. But my sister (Madison’s mom) is on parole from prison and is having a hard time finding a job. She’s got student loans, scholarships, and grants coming in so she can try and support them (and better herself), but right now she’s just Instacart-ing. It’s…. not ideal.

So! Here’s an Amazon Wishlist her and I worked on together. She also has a PayPal.Me (her PayPal address is adeanstudent at gmail if you want to eliminate PayPal taking a chunk). The Wishlist ranges from $5ish items up to $45ish items (that one is a real tool kit for kids and I’m not gonna lie, I’m hoping I can get her that some day and we can build some shit).

PLEASE consider signal-boosting, or if you can help out, please consider doing so! Madison has a few small presents coming to her from me, but they’re…. cheap. I got them from Wish over the summer cheap. And Madison is a genuinely good kid - she always wants to share her snacks and food and toys. Just… without thought, she wants people happy and fed. She is gonna make the world a better place when she gets older.

I only ever had Christmas (and Halloween, and school supplies, etc.) as a kid because of the kindness of strangers. I am kind because I was shown kindness - our shitty poverty-stricken childhood didn’t make us kind, but seeing strangers go out of their way to help us? That did.

I don’t want Madison to learn that lesson that way, but that’s just how it is. If we’re any indication, she’s gonna be something amazing. Until then, I am asking you to look at the list. We have cheap stuff and expensive stuff and everything in between. Needs and wants. Etc. Please, help my niece… and my sister.

[official-lucifers-child]

i’m teaching a tiny little girl to say “nonbinary” and she keeps saying “no banana” and once she said “none bananananary” and honestly? close enough, she’s adorable and her parents are super chill with me and they already taught her to say genderfluid (to her it’s genner-flooood) and transgender (trains genner) and a bunch of sexualities so now i’m adding “none bananananary” to the mix

[sharkenthusiast]

Taught a kid I was babysitting how to say “genderqueer” and he keeps forgetting how to pronounce it so another good one is “gender weird” and I love it so much

[official-lucifers-child]

the genners:

trains genner

no banana

genner floooood

gender weird

[transmortifried]

no banana pride flag

[revoltingchild]

[mxlabradorite]

I will reblog this every Christmas season I’m on tumblr.

[drunkygoesonadventures]

It’s beginning to look a lot like shit scram

[drgaellon]

Merry Shitscram!