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𝐫𝐡𝐲𝐞𝐬 ─ .✦ 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 ⋆ 𝐡𝐞 . . . 𝟐𝟎 ✦.─ 𝐀𝐮𝐀𝐃𝐇𝐃 ⋆. "𝐻𝑜𝑙𝑑 𝑚𝑒, 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑠𝑜𝑙𝑒 𝑚𝑒..." .𓂃 ࣪ .✧་࿐

[star0boy]

⋆ ๋𓂃✦༢  ﹒﹒   Welcome .

"...my longing to be with you torments me"

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﹒﹒   About་࿐

This blog will mostly be personal as well as focusing on my diagnosis and disabilities. Connecting with those who share my struggles, finding those like-minded, and just overall discussions of anything and everything in between.

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﹒﹒   Intro་࿐

My name is Asher but I also don't mind being addressed as Rhyes.

• Rhyes is my main sona and mascot for my acc.

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They/Them/He/Him ⟢ Trans Demiboy ⋆ Wolf

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Achillean ⋆ QPR ~ 🦴

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~⋆ Socials

Instagram ⋆ Strawpage ⋆ Kin Blog

﹒﹒   Diagnosis་࿐

Mental ⟢ Autism ⋆ ADHD ⋆ DMDD ⋆ Social Anxiety

Suspected ⟢ BPD

Physical ⟢ T1D ⋆ Patella Alta ⋆ Celiac Disease ⋆ Vasovagal Syncope ⋆ Chronic Pain ⋆ Chronic Fatigue ⋆ Lymphocytic Gastritis

Suspected ⟢ POTS ⋆ EDS

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"Show me where it hurts so I know where to love you the hardest"

﹒﹒   BYI་࿐

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⟢ I am autistic and don't convey/understand tone well. If im rude or say something hurtful let me know, I most likely didn't mean it as such.

⟢ That being said my autism makes me rather apathetic. I may not give wanted reactions or care to some situations just know it's not anything with you.

⟢ Any and all art shown will have either been made by me or for me. DO NOT take and use it as your own.

⟢ Open to making friends but not particularly outgoing, don't feel scared to reach out.

⟢ As noted before, this will be a medical and disabilities page, and with that come discussions of medical practices, procedures, details, and trauma attached to that. If those topics don't suit you take care of yourself and possibly don't interact.

⟢ Feel free to ask questions !

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﹒﹒   DNI་࿐

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⟢ Basic DNI

⟢ Fakeclaimers

⟢ Proship

⟢ Anti-Abortion

⟢ Pro AI

⟢ MDNI

⟢ Map/Pedo/Zoo

⟢ Fakers

⟢ Medical elitest/comparers

⋆ None of this is a competition. Don't make it into one.

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Sona/Mascot Rhyes; art by Leoahi on Discord/TH

Blog boarder credits : astrivion

[star0boy]

Thoughts !

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My window AC unit has started making this little like high pitch raddling noise and it actually makes me want to rip my eardrums out /nsrs

It's so unbelievably grating

[overclockedopossum]

Ableists hate it when a neurodivergent (or otherwise disabled) person says "no, I can't do that" because they demand visible suffering from disabled people to prove they're not Faking It.

[star0boy]

Thoughts

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The inexplicable urge to just stop trying to reach out and talk to ppl and never be heard from or seen again

[overclockedopossum]

If you tell neurodivergent people they need to "get comfortable with being uncomfortable" I am putting gravel in your shoes. No you can't take the gravel out. You have to deal with it. Dealing with it makes you a better person. What do you mean "pointless suffering".

[star0boy]

A letter of hate.

~Sincerely, Chronic Illness

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All art is made by me for me. DO NOT STEAL.

A small series of work i made for my watercolor final. There were supposed to be 5 but i only managed to get 4 done because of ironically enough, chronic illness. The last i just didn't like.

This work focuses on my own relationship with the chronic illnesses i face within my own body. How they make me feel, how i view my own body as a result and some of how it just feels like a constant, driving, exhausting, uncomfortable, disconnecting, and excruciating force within the body.

[strayk9s]

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[star0boy]

Question !!!

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Question for fellow Celiacs with tattoos. Hell, or even if you're a doctor and are on Tumblr.

I wanna get tattoos hopefully starting over the summer since I'll finally have money and a stable income but I'm worried about the ink. I've seen a few posts talking about how gluten can be in the ink for tattoos, and yea I know probably not all ink but I really wouldn't be surprised if it was the case for some.

So I guess my main question is how do you handle that? Have you asked your artist about the ingredients in the ink before getting work done or has it never really be a thought? Im just worried because I have such violent reactions when it's in my system. Then again(nuances omfg) some people have skin reactions to touching gluten while others don't, if i dont have skin reactions to coming in contact would I be safe? Since it wouldn't technically be entering my digestive system and only the skin/bloodstream???

Like i never thought having to get tattoos would be this difficult 😭

[chertilaaa]

– 🫀

[star0boy]

Rant ? Vent ?

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I find my relationship with my medical life in relations to my art so odd.

I'm an art student, in a fine arts school, it's what I plan to make a living off once I get my BFA. Naturally people expect me to be making art about my struggles in terms of my medical and mental issues; yet I find myself so utterly and physically repulsed by the thought.

I always tell myself I never want to be the type of artist to make all my work about my disabilities, reflecting my disabilities, or depicting my disabilities (not that there's anything wrong with artists who do). I want my art to make me feel good, to be pretty, to be beautiful in a way that it makes you forget everything but it in that moment.

And making art about my disabilities is the opposite of it. So viscerally opposite that I find myself repulsed even when I think about doing it. And I know it is most likely an internalized trauma response and not wanting to let go of the escapism my art provides for me. That it's something I should work through.

Yet I have done art of my disabilities despite hating it. On chronic pain, nausea, feeling chronically sick, T1D, my body just falling apart at the seams. I try my hardest to make others feel burdened and, gross, and helpless as i feel. And yet I still find myself resenting myself for carrying out those works even if they are successful. Just for the fact that they even exist.

[zylahbee]

many disabled people are experiencing multiple debilitating symptoms at once, every day.

this seems to be a major part of my life that is incredibly difficult for abled people to grasp.

they cling onto one symptom, and create this imaginary image of my health that said symptom is all i deal with, and if i am not experiencing that symptom then i am completely fine!!!

an entirely hilarious phenomenon when i literally have multiple illnesses. so even if each illness came with one symptom i would still have multiple?? 😭

i seriously don’t understand why almost every abled person i encounter thinks like this.

[star0boy]

Ramble

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Justice for the ppl with summer seasonal depression man. Like omg i can feel it seeping into my bones already as it gets hotter and the trees are staring to become fuller with leaves again.

Also just the fact no one talk abt it 😭

It's always just all abt winter seasonal depression and then you get looked at like you're crazy when you say summer makes you loose your will to live. Like omfg does it bring me little to no joy.

Maybe it's also just cuz im chronically ill and summer time makes my body just start to crap out more than usual as opposed to the winter when I feel better physically? Idk, idc. All i know is that I miss the cold, i miss my snow and the way the sun makes it glitter, I miss the way the frost would glitter off everything in the morning, I miss the longer nights, I miss watching the snow fall, I miss my hr of sleep summer took away.

Sure summer can be nice in some little ways but it just doesn't compare to winter for me and the joy it brings to me and my mental health. I miss winter 💔

[star0boy]

Vent !

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I fucking hate being diabetic. Hate having to always be conscious of having to keep myself alive and going, make sure weight is managed, make sure ik how many carbs are in food, make sure to bolus right so bg won't get fucked up thought it will anyways, make sure bg isn't too high or too low. Fucking hate being up so damn early having to stick myself with shit and count out mls of insulin to refill shit to make sure i dont die in the middle of the night, cuz god forbid my body have just been able to function correctly.

Or worrying if my insurance is just one day gonna decide they don't wanna provide my insulin and then i need to worry if i can ration until we fight them to get it approved. Ntm if there were to be a power outage on a bad enough level where things wont come back, just oh well, time for a slow painful death ig.

And always having to be so conscious of keeping myself alive and constantly feeling like shit is so unbelievably exhausting ntm knowing i have to do this for the rest of my life without fail. My doctor says my numbers are great and im doing great but it's hard to care or feel happy abt it when all i feel abt it is contempt and resentment. not even just towards my condition but to myself for having to deal with it.

And it's fucking ok that I feel like that. It's ok to hate the hand you've been delt, to hate that deal with and live with shit that you never asked for for the rest of your life.

[star0boy]

Rant !!!

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I always find it so bs that Celiacs are the ones having to pay the price(LITERALLY) for their food allergy/autoimmune disorder. Not even just fuckass prices but the ignorance as a whole on Celiac Disease. Someone can say they have a peanut allergy and they'll typically be believed no questions asked, say you have celiac and suddenly we're in an interrogation having to prove something. "Well back in my day.." back in your day we fucking died of malnutrition or just had a diet of pure bananas Linda.

Like never in my life have I seen dairy free, nut free, soy free, etc be anywhere near as expensive as gluten free food. God forbid I dont want food with the price jacked up the ass in an already unaffordable world. Ntm the overall lack of food as a whole??? Like what? You just want me to eat the same three options on the market for the rest of my life and then on top of that the stores may just stop carrying that food option all together and we'll never see it again. A lot of shit is either uncertified, cross-contaminated, has wheat byproducts, or we're just being straight up lied to.

Like holy shit man, I just want to be able to eat food without thinking it might poison me, bankrupt me, or just randomly stop being made.