#aroacespectrum

[asmodeussunderstudy]

turns out I FORGOT TO POST FOR AROACE DAY

[mysexualidentity]

💚🖤🤍💜 discovering myself

For a long time, I couldn’t quite put into words why romance and sex never really clicked for me. I liked people, I cared about them, but that spark everyone talked about, the crushes, the butterflies, the desire, just wasn’t there.

Eventually, I found the words that actually fit: aroace.

I don’t experience romantic or sexual attraction, and honestly, that makes sense of so many things I used to wonder about.

But that doesn’t mean I don’t notice beauty.

Sometimes I find men or women (or anyone, really) aesthetically attractive, the way someone carries themselves, their style, the energy they give off. It’s not about wanting them, it’s just a quiet kind of appreciation.

That’s why I also describe myself as bi-aesthetic aroace.

I can see beauty in anyone, but I don’t feel the need for romance or sex. It’s not absence, it’s peace.

Touch and closeness are personal for me, too. Being touched or crowded can make me anxious, and I’ve learned that letting someone close — physically or emotionally — is a privilege. It’s about trust, not distance.

Realising this about myself has been freeing. I don’t need to force a type of connection that doesn’t feel natural. I can still build strong friendships, deep bonds, and meaningful relationships — just in my own way.

It’s okay to exist outside the boxes. It’s okay to be comfortable with who you are, even if it doesn’t match what others expect.

💚🖤🤍💜

bi-aesthetic aroace | autistic | proud to know myself better

[crystallizedmoon]

Made a poll on the AroAce Spec Empire blog-

Having to share the link before Tumblr isn't showing the post on the tags yet- 🤧

Tumblr is a place to express yourself, discover yourself, and bond over the stuff you love. It's where your interests connect you with your

[trenderpawz]

hahaha hiii i made a new term + flag for myself i wanted to share because i figured something out abt myself lately

feral-sexual/romantic (i can't think of a better name right now...)

I'm coining this to describe my own experience with romance and sexual attraction,

a feral cat is a cat whose exposure to humans was little to nonexistent or was dangerous, leading to the cat being afraid of and averse to humans.

For me, this is exactly how i feel about romance and sexual attraction, I've considered myself cupioromantic for a while but i still find myself afraid of people finding romantic or sexual interest in me, despite my desire for it.

so i made a term n flag for it ^~^) i wonder if anyone else can relate to this... i tried to use the colors of the cupio flag + browns to represent fear [its also a "natural color" you can find on cats ^~^]

[trevorfindsthestrals]

Like is it possible to be in a relationship with someone and not be sexually attracted to them? like everywhere people talk that a relationship is dead without sex :( like i just love italian guy so much and want to spend the rest of my life with him i’ve never had a stronger bond with anyone else, like we’re soulmates (!!) but like he is not really attractive as some girls (and certain specific guys) are and like i don’t really want to kiss him?? is it possible to stay bi if i only have one straight relationship? i’ve never had many friends, is this just really strong friendship? i mean i’m mostly gay and i don’t know if it’s internalized heteronormative bullshit but i don’t want to end up with some girl and not be with him? him testing out with guys is fine with me, but am i secretly jealous when i think nobody deserves him? yikes!?!?

[trevorfindsthestrals]

so i’m tired of ace discourse

as a wlw on the aroace spectrum it upsets me that people don’t want aces in the LGBTQA+ community, because i want to belong in the community not just as a gay person but also as an ace person. i’m about just as sure of my asexuality as of my gayness (which tbh isn’t very sure, that’s true, but it’s still part of my identity). And sure i might be just “confused” but doesn’t LGBTQA+ include questioning people? Are you the same people who think bi people are just in a “phase”? Sexuality is confusing. 

Sure i am conflicted about cis heterosexual aces in the community. And sure aces don’t face the same level of discrimination and aren’t oppressed. But ultimately i still think we belong in the LGBT community. 

EDIT: took away the I in the acronym since i’ve seen several posts about intersex people not being comfortable with being part of LGBT.

[trevorfindsthestrals]

ok i deleted my gay/wlw blog because i kept having anxiety just thinking about kissing/romance. like some kind of ace disphoria if that exists? idk i love girls and guys a bit but being aroacespectrum complicates things

[trevorfindsthestrals]

so italian guy basically just wants gay sex it seems? like one night stands? because last time was several months ago and he "needs some". and im kinda shaking my head at him like the prude aroacespectrum person i am wondering if i've been hurt by men or something?

he says the guy he is seeing is so manly and i say that he always says that, is "manly" the most important feature in a date? and he unironically says yes?! and that's when i realize my most important feature would be "nice/not a creep/doesn't want to use and hurt me"??? like woo boy italian guy has no concerns as a guy. even as a bi guy. so when he tells me "don't judge me" im not judging him for sex, but because what he said made me feel alienated towards the rest of the world. like i am very understanding towards people wanting sex and telling me of their crushes, but it does get lonely on the gay ace side.