಄ pairing(s): shinyu x reader, dohoon x reader, youngjae x reader, hanjin x reader, jihoon x reader, kyungmin x reader
಄ synopsis: “your best hurts sometimes.” tws x reader with events leading up to their break up. some was unavoidable, some could have been changed by past actions, some could have been done better.
hola, melon signing back in. i was doing chemistry homework when i randomly thought of this even though i had another draft i was working on. i felt kinda angsty today so another angst it is… i hope you enjoy it! thank you!
as the leader of tws, he had lots of responsibilities to bear, and you understood it. he had to make sure that things went according to plan all the time. but, your lifestyles were just too different. his schedule was always too busy for the two of you to meet up.
when you two meet up, you always have to be on edge to make sure no one recognises the both of you, and clearly you hated it. but you couldn’t tell him, what could you tell him? that you hated that he was doing his job? like that, you kept it inside and suffered for months.
on the days that you did meet up, he would constantly be worrying about his schedules and the upcoming comeback that they have to prepare for. it always made you wonder why you two even met up for.
the lack of communication between the two was what cut that string that connected you two, so you both just let it go. there was barely any quality time spent when you two were together, so there was no point in holding on.
“yuya, i can’t do this anymore.”
“i know. i’m sorry i couldn’t be a better boyfriend to you.”
despite the both of you being idols and both of your schedules always never matching up, the two of you still tried your best to make things work. texting and calling often, meeting up, or just making some time for the other.
one day, when the two of you were out on a date, maybe you were just a little careless, and you two were spotted by a sasaeng fan.
it was a cruel lesson, that love can’t solve everything.
things went downhill. pictures were taken, tabloids spread like wildfire. protest trucks lined up outside your companies, hate comments on every post and video, even death threats started coming in.
both of your mental health might have hit the limit, and your members being worried too. that one picture destroyed their dreams, love and themselves. they both knew that once they broke up, everything would come to an end, and everything would be resolved.
“dohoon, i can’t take this anymore, let’s break up…?”
“promise me, in another life, (name)?”
“in another life, dohoon.”
youngjae somehow always made you feel like you were the only one who cared about your relationship, even if he didn’t mean to. every time you try to show that you care with something simple, maybe asking him about his day, he reply’s with short words and dryly.
everything has to be initiated by you. asking him to go out on dates, going out on your anniversary, literally everything. “maybe he’s just awkward at these kind of things”. that was the mindset you tried to keep up.
but from some point onwards, it just couldn’t anymore.
on dates, he wouldn’t really look you in the eye, much less talk to you. he wouldn’t take out his phone and play games or message his members, leaving you there not knowing what to do at all.
never once in this relationship had you truly felt that he cared about you. never once have you seen him put any effort into this relationship.
so you stopped trying. maybe he really tried. maybe he really cared. maybe he really loves me. you couldn’t think that way anymore. he made you feel unloved, that he didn’t care about you, so you stopped trying to make him, and convince yourself that he does.
“there’s no saving this relationship anymore, so let’s end this.”
both of you were doing well as high school students in china preparing for gaokao. you had a healthy relationship, a boyfriend that really cared and loved you.
until one night, you and hanjin were taking a stroll in the park nearby, when he suddenly stopped walking, making you turn around to face him, only to see that expression that he makes only when he truly has something important to say.
“i’m going to south korea to become an idol.”
when you heard those words, you didn’t know how to react, but somehow, you managed to get your voice out, “good for you.”
you both had agreed long ago that if one day, one of you had to leave for far away, you wouldn’t try for a long-distance relationship. you both knew that both of you wouldn’t be able to keep it up.
on the day you went to send him off at the airport, bidding your final goodbye to him, you said, “goodbye hanjin, let’s break up. and i hope you get to fulfil your dream.”
with that, he turned around, glancing once more at you, before it was goodbye for forever. on the plane, the tears wouldn’t stop flowing. on the car, hers could only fall silently as she stared out the window, watching his plane take off.
maybe if you had stopped him, things would have been different. but how could you stop him from pursuing his dream? who were you to even do that?
him being an idol, he has to practise a lot. but he was more extreme than anyone else in that sense. he practised more than anyone else, being a perfectionist, he never let a mistake of his slide, and wouldn’t stop until he got it right.
jihoon would stay at the studio until midnight, and leave before you even woke up. there was no interaction at home despite sharing one.
on the days you pick him up from the studio, you end up having to wait for hours before he would finally agree to leave, but only because you really started to get mad at him. you knew him well, and you knew how passionate he was about dancing and doing his job. you couldn’t stop him from that.
but it was really going too far. he would leave you on delivered or read for hours when he was too focused, replying only hours later.
you hated being the second choice in his life. why couldn’t you be the first? why does he have to prioritise dancing over you?
maybe you were just not the right person for him. he needed someone who would support his passions, while you needed someone who would make you feel like his first choice.
“hoon, why do i always have to be the second choice in your life?”
“what do you mean? you are-”
“i am. i always have been, and i can’t take it anymore, so i’m leaving.”
maybe it was because he was the eldest sibling at home. maybe that’s why he feels this sense of responsibility in everything. maybe that’s why always tries to resolve conflicts, and shoulder everything on his own.
in the early days of the relationship, every time you asked out of concern if he was alright, he would always reply with “i’m fine.” you didn’t try to force yourself in and make him open the door to his heart, thinking that he would eventually open up to you.
but even as months go by, he never tried to. every time you tried to get him to do so, he would always just brush it off or just change the subject.
did he not trust you? did he find you unreliable? did he think of you as someone he couldn’t confide in?
maybe he really cared, maybe he really tried, but maybe he also really didn’t want to burden you with the things that seemed little to him.
but you couldn’t do this any longer either. even if he tried his best. but sometimes, his best hurts more than anything else.
“kyungmin, please stop shutting me out…”
“you are! why can’t you just tell me your troubles? if this is how you are going to be in the future too, when we are older and married, i’d rather just end this now.”
i highkey felt so bad when i was writing dohoon and kyungmin’s. i think i really did youngjae dirty in this one too. anyways, melon signing out and i hope you enjoyed it!
credits to the owners of the pictures. do not copy or plagiarize my works!
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