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shark vs the universe
sheepfilms
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Cosimo Galluzzi

if i look back, i am lost
Noah Kahan
occasionally subtle

pixel skylines
Peter Solarz

#extradirty
Stranger Things

oozey mess
official daine visual archive
EXPECTATIONS
we're not kids anymore.
đ©” avery cochrane đ©”

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@themodnamedjet
Theory: Nobody who writes a physics textbook gives any fucks
Evidence:
Update: Legolasâ pupils are about 3.5Â cm wide each. Now drawing kawaii Legolas on physics assignment.
And they told you science was no fun.
Science!
Iâm going to do it. Iâm going to hand it in.
Legolasâs pupil size isnât the problem here, though. 5 leagues is 17.262 miles. The curvature of the Earth means that for a person of average height, the visual horizon is less than three miles away. Even if your vision is telescopic and the atmosphere is perfectly clear, you canât see around the planet. If they were standing on a hill, it would have to be at LEAST 198 feet above sea level in order to see the horizon at 17.2 miles away, with nothing tall in between. Which, knowing Rohan, isnât impossible.
But consider: Elven satellite eyeballs.
you mean like
@sidereanuncia itâs back, the post that I can only imagine haunts your nightmaresÂ
I shall never find peace.
Also, for what itâs worth, thereâs absolutely no reason to believe that the curvature of Middle Earth is the same as that of Earth.
Thereâs no evidence that Middle Earth curves.
Yeah there is. Â The Silmarillion states that the world was curved after the fall of Numenor (I believe), preventing access to Valinor. Â But Elves (among others) can travel the straight path across it.
So middle earth is round, but not for Elves because magic.
So wait, the reason he can see that far is because Elves just have the ability to ignore the curve of the earth? Thatâs awesome. It also means that no matter how good your optics got, you would always want elf eyes manning the spyglass because they can see arbitrarily far while everybody else is limited by this âhorizonâ bullshit.
Oh thank God, my poor elf prince has seen too much in this post
Elves are flat-earthers
This post went from amusing to horrifying, to be brought back down to amusing, sprinkled in with some cannon explanation, and then you leave me here in fucking outrage
This post really was a rollercoaster.
for elves it was a straight line
kids today are too fucking powerful.,, we merely adopted the internet, they were born in it
This kid is a fuckin master look how long it took him to break
Cursed school presentations? Thank you!
I hate presentations đbut who doesnât?
That shrek one is threatening
May the 10 of Pentacles bless your account with more money than you can spend. đ”âš
10 of Pentz came thruuu
Omg this actually works!!! Thank you 10 of Pentacles!!!
I could seriously use this money right nowâŠ.
Please give me my refund of 400$ soonâŠ
I feel obligated to reblog this every time it shows up in my dash
No bragging, just 100% floored and grateful. Work hard, maintain a positive attitude, and believe that anything can happen.
So I reblogged this exactly a week ago because I thought it was funny and uh lo and behold, a family friend wrote me a big olâ check just to help me out of a tough financial spot AND my bank refunded me $32 for fees theyâd originally taken out. SO UH YEAH. Reblogging this again in hopes that it brings equally good fortune to my followers.
Sure why not? Jobs bring in money and prosperityâŠ
Tintin remembers what comes after 15.
FUCKING HELL ITâS BACK FROM LAST YEAR
This literally gets reblogged every 15th of the month. Itâs almost two years old. Itâs beautiful.
listen up yaâll this post is 6 years old now and youâre still reblogging it. every month. once a month, my notifications blow up for this one video, but only until the 16th. then the notes on this vid completely stop. itâs so eerily spot on and impressive how you just all collectively know what to do. if Iâm not online, people irl still remind me that itâs the 15th. thank you for six surreal years of me wondering if I completely fucking lost it. hereâs to the 15th
Man WHAT THE FUCK LMAOOOOOOO
Well, that is one way to pass the time during a rain delay
This is the quality content I live for
i am begging everyone to watch this video right now
HSHDJDJ
Dont avada kedavra the messenger
Why is this edited just like Unnhhh? I fucking love it!
Those are some damn cleaned glass doors
Wholesome prank
More Weird Shit I Found in the Woodsâą.
Geometrically-challenged child cultists should have stuck with the triangles.
Is this real life Dipper Pines?
âoh look. Another mysterious stone path in the woods. 3 guesses where this leads.â
(at the end of the path)
âListen. I know everyone wants to summon a demon at summer camp. I get it, I really do! But if youâre gonna try that shit just⊠put some effort into it. I mean look at this shit. ITâs justâŠItâs not even symmetrical. And look at this egg thing. Itâs wildly disproportionate to the rest of it. It sucks! It objectively sucks! If I were a demon and I saw this, I would actually be offended. Try harder, kids. Try harder.â
@captioned-vines
someone should add one of those vintage âyou triedâ star memes in the shape of this
Like this?
Why does this person look and sound so much like a cartoon character???
a witch cursed me to be this way
More women
Thank god they decided to make more
Life of Crocodile
via https://imgur.com/gallery/mG5O6pR
reblog to yeehaw
yeehaw
my parents arenât teaching me life lessons.
#i need some adults to TEACH ME SHIT ABOUT LIFE
Iâm an adult.
Some shit about life, from a bonafide adult:
even if you get along great with your family you will get along even better with them after moving outÂ
generic is almost always just as good as name brand. But there are some things you never buy generic, including: peanut butter, ketchup, liquid NyQuil, Chips-Ahoy chewy chocolate chip cookies
just imagine the person on the other end of the phone hates talking on the phone as much as you do. Even a receptionist. I worked as one and I hate talking on the phone
at least once in your life you will go to Wal-mart to buy something under $20 like an ironing board or something and your debit card will get rejected. No one will judge. Everyone at some point in their lives has had $2.98 in their bank account.Â
thrift stores
everyone else is too busy panicking about everyone else noticing every tiny thing that could possibly be wrong about them to notice any tiny thing that could possibly be wrong about you
you will screw up. a lot. you live and you learn. and when you start to think too hard about that embarrassing thing that happened and how you wish you could change it, just tell yourself that whatâs done is done. Thereâs no changing it, so just forget it and move on. Itâs the only way to stay sane.
do the dishes before the sink grows its own ecosystem
you canât put Dawn dishsoap in the dishwasher.Â
if you are the only one in the aisle at the grocery store, and you need to get from one end to the other without even looking at anything in that aisle, then you should totally cart-surf down the aisle. Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional. Hold on to the little things. They make all the difference.
never try to make cake from scratch at 3am. You end up with a topographical map of Middle Earth.
15% tip.Â
the best way to get money for food is to tell your grandparents about how you basically live on microwaved mac and cheese. Their horror may result in twenty bucks and orders to go out and get yourself âa real dinnerâ.
sometimes life sucks, and knowing that it might get better doesnât always make it suck any less, but youâll never get to the non-sucky days without enduring the suckiness.Â
no seriously, NEVER put Dawn in your dishwasher
Do not buy generic brand spaghetti sauce either.
Always check the type of light bulb that goes in lamps. A 60w is not interchangeable with a 40w.
Dollar store batteries work just as well as store brand.
Reward yourself from time to time when you do things that you needed to get done. Itâs a good way to remind yourself to do them. Going out to pay a bill? Get Starbucks or something you donât get often. Rewards donât have to be huge, they can be small things like that.
Rice, pasta, flour, sugar, cheese, eggs, milk, a pack of chicken, a pack of frozen veggies and a well stocked spice cabinet go a long way food-wise. Splurge and get the biggest container of rice you can. You donât have to go back and buy it again anytime soon and it makes a TON of meals in the meantime.
Rice can be cooked on the stove. You donât need a fancy rice cooker. Two parts water to every one part rice (two cups water for one cup of rice for example). Get your water boiling, add rice, put a plate or lid on it, put it on low for 20 minutes. It should be done.
Keep a calendar on your pc of bill due dates. If your bills are set up at inconvenient times, like all of the services started on the first or something, then call up the company and find out if you can get your billing date switched to something more manageable. A lot of places do try to work with you.
There is no shame in calling a company and asking for an extension on a bill. Let them know what you can pay, pay that amount, and they arrange when the rest of the payment is required. This can stop you from having services shut off man. It shows responsibility on your part.
Take time to eat, even when you donât feel like eating. Your body needs energy to live.
Wash or rinse your dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. It prevents gross caked on junk.
âThe Worksâ is an excellent cheap toilet cleaner.
MAGIC. FUCKING. ERASERS. THEY WORK ON EVERYTHING JUST DONâT SCRUB HARD. I took the ring out of our bathtub with one. Also generic ones work just as well.
Keep some bleach around but if you use it for cleaning? Dillute it. Thereâs rarely ever a case where you need to pout straight bleach on anything. A cap full or two in a bucket of water works just fine.
DO NOT MIX CLEANERS. Chemical reactions are can be very dangerous. Hereâs a good list. (Note that vinegar and baking soda can actually be a good combo for removing smells from things but itâs not very good at actually -cleaning-.)
If you drink? Donât take meds at the same time itâs just not good.
Make sure you check the dosages on your pill bottles. No one wants to accidentally overdose on cough syrup or ibuprofen.
If you have a uterus make sure you have a heating pad and ibuprofen on hand for the pain. Hot baths also generally help and Ginger Tea is excellent for any nausea.
Buy a first aid kit. Itâs worth it in the long run.
You can often do your taxes online at places like TurboTax.
Hereâs some good sex ed resources because I had to explain what a yeast infection was recently.Â
Petroleum jelly (aka Vaseline) is good for chapped lips and you can get a decent sized tube or tub of it (generic brand version) for cheaper/same price as Chapstick.
KEEP TRIPLE ANTIBIOTIC OINTMENT IN YOUR HOUSE FOR CUTS AND SCRAPES AND SORES.Â
~~Medications~~
Over the counter medications (stuff you can buy right off the shelf no prescription needed) have a name brand and a generic name. ALWAYS buy generic if itâs available it is literally the same thing and way cheaper usually.
Some names to remember when youâre looking for meds!
Acetaminophen = Tylenol
Used to treat pain and reduce fever. Do not take with Ibuprofen.
Ibuprofen = Advil, Midol, Motrin
Used for pain and fever, is an anti-inflammtory. Is good for period cramps because it is an NSAID (non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drug).
Naproxen = Aleve, Naprosyn
Treats fever, pain, arthritis pain, gout, period cramps, tendinitis, headache, backache, and toothache. Is also an NSAID.
Acetaminophen + Asprin + Caffeine = Excedrin
Usually marketed as âMigraine Reliefâ as a generic.
Asprin = Bayer
Use for pain, fever, arthritis, and inflammation. Makes you bleed easily so should not be used for periods. Might reduce risk of heart attacks.\
Triple Antibiotic Ointment = Neosporin
Used on cuts, sores, and scrapes to reduce risk of infection and promote healing.
Also a general mutli-vitamin isnât a bad idea and if you donât get a lot of fruits or milk/sunshine in your diet you might want to get vitamins C and D specifically for daily use.
if you do accidentally lapse and put dawn in your dishwasher, run it empty and put hair conditioner where the detergent goes. thatâll clean it out (tip given to me by dorm custodian when roommate did the thing).
if you live off ramen, add stuff to it! add veggies you like, donât use the whole flavor packet to cut down on sodium and msg or donât use it at all and add your own spices.
if youâre making something with potatoes in it (beans, stew) potatoes are done when you can easily stab a fork through them.
you can microwave a hotdog as long as you put it in a microwave safe container of water. microwaves work by making water molecules vibrate. also, when reheating rice leftovers, add a small amount of water, like maybe a spoonfull, so it doesnât get hard and crunchy.
the rice cooking advice above is for long grain rice. if youâre making short or medium grain rice, a 1:1 ratio (one cup water for one cup rice) is better, so the rice doesnât come out too mushy.
buy a few cans of chicken. wholesale club stores like samâs, costco, or bjâs tend to carry multipacks for a good price. theyâre incredibly useful for when you forget to defrost meat.
buy meat on sale and put it in the freezer. buy vegetables on sale, and put them in the freezer. frozen veggies are often as flavorful and good as fresh ones, keep longer, and often come in microwaveable bags or with microwave directions.
soak ink stains in milk to help get them out or at least lighten them.
soak blood stains in water as soon as possible, with a bit of detergent or stain remover. scrub at them. use cold water, heat binds proteins to fabric. tbh, thereâs no real need to change the washer from cold-cold setting unless the thing youâre washing says to wash in warm water.
acetone, found in most nail polish removers, dissolves super glue.
YOUâRE ALL DOING GODâS WORK BLESS YOU
Takes pictures, have prints made and put them in photo albums. Be IN the pictures, have someone take pictures of you and your friends. Get over not looking perfect in thw picture. Someday that friend might be gone and those pictures might be all youâll have, you will want to be in them. I made that mistake with my best friend, i always felt weird asking for a picture together⊠he died of cancer January of 2014 and now i have no pictures of us together. Its my only regret in life.
This is really helpful, thank you all!
Iâm the newest of new adults but Iâm gonna throw these little tips in there. IF YOU HAVE AN OLD CAR:Â
-coolant or water if your car overheats (coolant is preferable cause it wonât hurt the engine in the long run but hey i know money is tight)Â
-flashlight in case you break down at night and need to check under the hood and your phone is dead
-SPARE TIRE.Â
-jumper cables.you will at some point leave your lights on. you just will.Â
AAA or any other road side service is never a bad investment i swear. (try to mooch it off your parents as long as you can though)Â
Know how to change a tire. Youâre going to need to do it at some point in time and you canât always rely on someone else to do it for you.
Donât be afraid to go to your local food bank. They are there for a reason.
Donât be ashamed to ask for help period. Life is hard, everyone needs help occasionally.
You can put a LOWER wattage bulb in a lamp that says itâs for a higher one, but donât put a HIGHER wattage bulb in. Also, watts refer to the amount of electricity used. LUMENS refers to the amount of light put out, and can vary quite a bit between brands, even though the wattage is the same. Look for the one with the highest lumens unless you actually want a slightly dimmer bulb in a certain location. Those dollar store batteries? Fine if theyâre alkaline. âHeavy-dutyâ batteries, however, wonât last nearly as long. You can microwave a hot dog and bun simply by wrapping them in a toweling for a minute, less if you donât want them scalding hot.
Reblogging to save lives.
Two adulting (kitchen-related) tips from me!
1. Buy a roll of parchment paper from the cooking shit aisle. A big roll will last you for-fucking-ever. Pretty much any time youâre using a baking pan you can line it with that stuff and save yourself A: food sticking to the pan and B: itâs a quick rinse and itâs clean.
2. Bread can get fucking expensive, so make your own. A bigass bag of flour and a bag of active dry yeast (store it in the friiiiidge!!!) works out a FUCK of a lot cheaper than buying bread at the store, and you can do so much more with it. Bread, pizza, rolls, cinnibuns, homemade pizza pockets. It seems intimidating but itâs stupid easy.
Seriously. Itâs stupid simple to make, and most of the â3 hoursâ to make it is sitting around surfing the internet or doing whatever the fuck you want while the dough rises. If you have an afternoon free once a week to sit and play video games or surf the net, you have the time to make your own bread on the cheap. Hereâs my simple-as-fuck recipe:
2 Œ teaspoons active dry yeast (You can buy a bag of this stuff CHEAP in bulk stores, the little packets are hella stupid priced) 1 cup warm water (think a hot bath) 1 œ teaspoons sugar 2 tablespoons oil (any kind works for the most part) 2 Œ cups flour 1 teaspoon salt
1. Stir the yeast, water, sugar, and oil up in a bowl. Let it sit for about 10 minutes. It will foam up VERY high, this is the yeast getting happy! If it doesnât get all foamy, the water may have been too hot or not hot enough. Remember, Yeast is alive! Treat it like a nice girlfriend!
2. Mix your flour, salt, and the yeast concoction up in a bowl.
3. Knead that shit for about 5 minutes. It will start sticky as heck, but will come together into a nice dough. If itâs still super sticky, toss in a bit more flour. Hereâs how to knead it:Â
4. Put your dough in a covered, lightly oiled bowl and leave it someplace warmish for an hour. At that point it will have roughly doubled in size, give it a gentle punch to release the gasses that have built up inside. Cover it again and let it sit for a bit longer.
Boom. You have bread dough. Here are some baking times and uses for ya:
Optional egg-wash: Just crack an egg into a bowl, add a pinch of salt, and mix the bejeebus out of it with a fork. Brush (or if youâre like me, goop it on with said fork) that shit thinly on bread before baking for a nice crust.
Pizza: Stretch it on a pan, stab the fucker all over with a fork, add toppings, bake 425*F 15-20 minutes.Â
Bread Sticks: Make snake-shapes, let rest on pan 10-ish minutes, bake 400*F 10-20 minutes.
Dinner rolls: Make ball-sized (yes those balls) balls. Place on greased pan, let rest 10-20 minutes to rise. Egg-wash and bake 375*F 25 minutes.
Bread: Lightly score (cut) the top, let sit for 20-ish minutes on/in whatever youâre using to bake it, egg-wash, bake at 375*F for 20-ish minutes. Itâs done when it sounds hollow if you knock on the bottom.
You bet your ass you can deep-fry this shit for cheapie yeast doughnuts. Roll that shit in sugar or dip it in whatever, itâs fucking tasty.
Bagels: YES. YOU. CAN. Form bagel-shapes out of the dough and boil them in salty water for about 2 minutes. Egg-wash them and bake them at 400*F for 10 minutes.
Cinnamon Rolls: Roll that shit out into a rectangle. Brush it with a mix of butter, cinnamon, sugar, and a pinch of salt (no exact amounts here, do it to your taste). Roll it up into a log, and cut it into discs. Let them sit 20 minutes in a pan and then bake at 375*F 15-17 minutes.
You can add whatever you want to the dough for some variety, just if itâs dried spices remember you really only need 1-ish tablespoons. I personally like making bread with about 1 tablespoon of dill in the dough. Roll it out flat, sprinkle it with cheddar, roll it into a log, squeeze the ends shut, and bake it like a regular loaf of bread. Cheesy dill bread OMNOMNOM.
*ahem* That got a bit long. But yeah. Breadâs expensive, yo. Save your wallet.
(Also itâs ridiculous amounts of therapeutic to bake, for me anyway)
Being able to bake your own bread is pretty awesome, if you got the time for it.Â
Correcting a misconception with the medicines part. You can absolutely safely mix acetaminophen (aka paracetamol) and ibuprofen! Start with a dose of either one, if thereâs still no relief, try the other after two hours. Avoid going over an individual tabletâs own limits (like if the ibuprofen says to only take two every four hours, donât go over that), but you can add the paracetamol to it safely if you stay within the recommended dosages for it, too.
Alternatively, you can just buy it in the one tablet. It was a godsend when I had my wisdom teeth out. They work in synergy, so one tablet with 500mg of paracetamol and 200mg of ibuprofen works way better than 1000mg of paracetamol or 400mg of ibuprofen.
More medicines! Generic names for antihistamines include cetirizine (Zyrtec), fexofenadine (Allegra), loratadine (Claritin), and promethazine (Phenergan). The latter can cause major drowsiness and is actually often used as a sedative and can have some pretty bad next-day sedation, so use it as a last resort only. The first three should be okay to take during the day. Benadryl depends on location; the one in the UK is often cetirizine, in the US and Canada, itâs usually diphenhydramine. Also causes drowsiness.
Antidepressants. Lots of different ones, you wonât always find the right fit first, I tried two others before I found one that was okay for me. You can get these as generics as well, way cheaper. Most antidepressants tend to be SSRIs (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, common ones include citalopram (Celexa), escitalopram (Lexapro), fluoxatine (Prozac), and sertraline (Zoloft)) and SNRIs (serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors, common ones include duloxetine (Cymbalta) and venlafaxine (Effexor) and are also pretty good for anxiety). Generally well-tolerated, make sure to avoid mixing them with stuff like St Johnâs Wort because they can interact really badly and cause things like Serotonin Syndrome. Last resorts can include MAOIs (monoamine oxidase inhibitors, less common due to their potential for bad interactions, check to see what foods you need to avoid on them but they can include stuff like⊠cheese), and older tricyclics. The SSRIs and SNRIs are pretty similar, like you can reduce discontinuation symptoms by going from one to the other (I went from Zoloft, to Lexapro, to Cymbalta without too many discontinuation / start-up side effects), although donât just⊠use them interchangeably. And if you do discontinue them, taper your doses and go off it gradually. I forgot to take Cymbalta for two days and was so dizzy I could barely walk.
Donât know enough about antipsychotics, meds for ADHD, benzodiazapines, et cetera to comment, alas (although I do know to never discontinue benzos suddenly, holy shit). If anyone can add info, thatâd be great!
For those other drugs, Iâm not going to judge, but honestly, just be safe. Know what youâre doing, use safe practices (donât share needles et cetera), and have someone around who isnât on anything in case anything bad does happen. Some can interact horrifically and sometimes fatally with medication, so be aware of that. And if you do have a bad reaction, for the love of everything, tell the paramedics. They will not judge you, but they canât help you if youâre not honest with them and they donât know whatâs going on. Stay safe!