Worms...2! @thornsword - Tumblr Blog

Boris won’t stop annoying me for dinner even though dinner is in 40 minutes so I’m trying to teach Boris when to expect dinner using base-bean

confusionofconfusions-deactivat

sulking

mr-deep-downer

cheerfullycatholic

When medicine is holding the migraine back but you can still kinda feel it in the distance waiting to return

foralittlewile

Tbh, I think everyone getting very attached to Tall Adrian™️ kinda makes them miss the potential of the canon reality that Eridians average at 50cm tall.

Grace is living on a planet of toddler sized rocks with twice his strength. If at ANY point he forgets to look where he’s going he is Going Trip Over An Ambassador. Unstoppable force vs. immovable object except Grace is very much stoppable.

Eridians either get used to talking to his shins, craning on their tippy toes to get a good look at his face, or begin forcing him to sit criss-cross applesauce for literally any important meeting. Picture him joining the Erid equivalent of a UN press conference and having to curl up his awkward water body and hug his knees for the whole thing.

He can conceivably be picked up by an alien the size of a hard helmet against his will. He’s surrounded by space roombas with perfect memories and attention spans shorter than his San Francisco classroom who can’t believe he’s incapable of solving complex math in three seconds. He has step stools around his house for them to climb so he can feel like he’s “looking them in the eye” even though Eridians think that’s stupid since they lack both eyes and directional perception.

His students are probably all palm sized. Once he starts teaching he’s fighting cuteness aggression all day every day. They could all break his fingers with hands the size of a button. That knowledge does not stop his cuteness aggression. THIS IS GRACE’S REALITY.

contagiousgrace

I just don't think we ever wrapped up the Clown Sightings of 2016 in a satisfactory way.

derinthescarletpescatarian

Who wants to hear a DIY tiling pro tip that the experts won't tell you

hazelriver74

Yes!

derinthescarletpescatarian

Do not drop your phone into the bucket of tile adhesive. This step is actually completely unnecessary and massively complicates the tiling process.

fueles

You say this but my uncle is a tiler and he swears by the “drop phone in putty bucket” technique. I think you’re just posting this for clout

derinthescarletpescatarian

Your uncle is caught up in a tradition that he was taught as an apprentice that he never questioned. Modern putty doesn't require phone, the formula has changed.

perfectly-disfigured

MY uncle says some customers still demand the phone putty technique because it "doesn't look right otherwise"

derinthescarletpescatarian

Drop an empty phone case in and those customers can't tell the fucking difference because there is no fucking difference.

lithiumdoll

My mum renovated houses for thirty years, she says “you’re half right, but in some cases - particularly in houses built before 1930 - the phone does add some benefit. Could be a tablet too if you’ve an old one in the garage. And anyone who says it’s got to be a particular model is just being precious about it, whatever the forums say.”

00venator

IPhones and tablets where invented in 1898, what did they do before then?

derinthescarletpescatarian

Nothing, tiles were invented in 1899.

thesaltofcarthage

my sister the historian studied ancient pompeiian tile mosiacs and there's definitely graffiti of dropping cans on strings into the buckets of putty, so it goes way back.

eggnogtoast

trying to bed a knight like: *unbuttons your jupon* *unbuckles your cuirass* *unbuckles your gorget* *takes off your hauberk* *stops to catch my breath* *unbuttons your gambeson* *takes off your shirt*

didhewinkback

when the odysseys box office success gets hollywood to green light a song of achilles adaptation connor storrie pick up ur phone

sygol

Hi I'm 1 years old and learning to read through your posts. Cigarette.

very good job using your words! will someone get this toddling bitch a smoke

whencartoonsruletheworld

mxtomituck

escabye-deactivated20190922

when ur mutuals are mutual with each other

pro: squad con: i saw this post like 18 times today

skingrad

lesbianmarrow

free use is kind of a funny kink bc it relies on the idea that everybody wants to touch you and have sex with you but what if they don't. what if you tell everybody at the party you're free use but they all ignore you and mind their own business