typottaja

they/them // suomi- ja muuta paskaa

[mothsplaining]

when dogs are scary smart

over the last several months, we have been implementing a protocol to eliminate karybelle the sheltie’s barking surrounding her mealtimes. we have accomplished this by initially introducing an alternate activity during prep time (stuffed kong) and religiously giving her a time out gated in the yard if she stops that activity to bark, thus delaying her dinner until she’s quiet. this has been extremely successful; she’s gone from barking literally 100+ times during meal prep to barking 0 times, and only occasionally slips up. the behavior she has chosen to replace her meal-prep-screaming (after all, that energy has to go somewhere) is frantically - but silently - running circles around the coffee table to finally slam into a perfect down-stay as her bowl is set down.

this evening as the food was coming out, karybelle seamlessly slipped into her silent circling routine. except after a couple of reps, she abruptly changed course, yeeted herself out the dog door, barked once, and immediately jumped back in to resume her circling.

if that isn’t a demonstration of crystal clear understanding of criteria, i…don’t know what is lmao

[tchaikovskaya]

literally the canine version of this

[arachnid-party]

i feel like a lot of discourse around identities could just be boiled down to “you could not pay me to care about this”

[arachnid-party]

therians? this doesn’t affect me in the slightest. weird transgenders? okay who cares. contradictory labels? none of my business. neopronouns? it takes 5 seconds of my time to google how to use a pronoun set this is like minimal brain work. bi lesbians? i don’t get how that works but the world will keep spinning. normalize minding your own business

[sin-ophelia]

Every time I find myself starting to get annoyed by these things, my follow-up thoughts are, what groups of people do these opinions align me with (homophobic transphobic bigots), and who do they alienate me from (other queer people), and I don't have to agree with every other queer person on the planet about every single thing. It's more important for me to be in a world where people can be weird and cringe and annoying; than the alternative of living in a society where heteronormativity is strictly enforced, with dire consequences to all those who do not comply

[typottaja]

mun pitää kirjottaa multimodaalisen median analyysi ja tuskailin ku en keksiny sopivaa tekstiä mut sit muistin suomitumpun. saa suositella postauksia

[animentality]

[bogleech]

They believe you know and that you're asking as part of some mind game, in order to feign innocence.

But the reason somebody would make that assumption about you is usually that it's what they would have done.

[sandersstudies]

Every time a small child starts crying or having a tantrum in my vicinity and I catch the parents glancing at me I’ve started saying “me when…”.

Friend kept trying to tell his crying kindergartener to calm down and relax and the kid growled “I AM relaxed” while visibly tensing every muscle in his body and I was like “oh that’s me at work every day” and we had a chuckle.

Parents look to other adults like “shit are they mad? Do they think my kid is acting like a demon?” And this response is my attempt to say “no. I think your kid is just acting like a human being.”

I WISH I could fling myself on the ground and cry because I experienced a minor inconvenience.

[vamptits]

they want you to make fried rice

[memser]

who is "they"

[vamptits]

the wok left

[solongandthanksforallthefish42]

how am I supposed to make fried rice if the wok left

[6qubed]

skillet issue

[depsidase]

[nohoperadio]

It sucks that there's only 20 minutes in each day. If there was more than that I would get more stuff done I'm sure

[kurgy]

wheres seasons greasons

[kurgy]

[kurgy]

its that time of year again

[theangriestlittleunicorn]

It doesn’t have to be

[kurgy]

its not optional

[write-on-world]

[ao3commentoftheday]

Image is of a very damaged road. There is an extremely short section in the middle that has been repaved and has fresh lines painted on it. At the bottom of the image, over a pothole, are the words "the beginning." Over the freshly paved section are the words, "A random part of a story I just imagined whilst sitting on the toilet." At the top of the image, over the rest of the damaged rode are the words, "The ending."

Image is the same as above, but cropped to show just the well-paved section of the road. The image is now labelled, "oneshot"

[spinejackel]

What are dead man walking tornadoes? :O

it’s a multi-vortex tornado. i dont remember the tribe it originates from (i think it was cherokee), but there’s a native american legend…? saying? that goes “if you see a man in a tornado, you are about to die.”

the most infamous shot of a dead man walking tornado hit jarrell, texas in 1997

it did so much damage to the town it caused the scale that tornados are measured by, the fijita scale, undergo revisions, and it made anchoring buildings in the tornado alley region pretty much mandatory. (it took the entire town off the map. only those who had taken shelter outside of the town or in underground bunkers survived.)

two more examples of dead man walking tornadoes looking like a person are a tornado from 2011 that hit cullman, alabama

and a tornado from 1975 that hit xenia, ohio

[elecktrum]

Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, that's terrifying on a whole new level.

[bogleech]

Can't even take a nice stroll through the countryside anymore without being called names 😞

[mossdftba]

Apparently this tiktok was deleted hours after I saved it.

[strawberrygiorno]

[Video ID: A Tiktok that several users have added onto, each making a different joke about gender.

Person 1: They say “No pronouns? Damn… another victim of gender identity theft.” They start cracking up on the last word.

Person 2: They start off smirking while they appear to think about what to say. Then, they look at the camera imitate a spam call voice, saying, “We have been trying to contact you about your gender’s extended warranty.”

Person 3: They come in through a doorway and yell, “It’s my gender identity, and I need it now!” The camera angle shifts to indicate they’re a different person, and they say, “Tired of not having a gender identity? J.G. Wentworth can help. Call J. G. Wentworth; 877-pro-nouns. They’re your pronouns, use them when you need em’!”

Person 4: They imitate the kind of voice you hear on legal ads and say, “Attention: If you or a loved one has been diagnosed with Gender, you may be entitled to financial compensation.”

Person 5: Starting off strong and dissolving into fits of laughter as they speak, they say, “-and now a word from our sponsor: Raid Shadow Genders; conquer all of the genders" End ID]

[fuck-a-saurus]

@thealexchen

[logarto]

i went to go pick up my HORMONES from the chemist today and the guy was quite sweet and very well intentioned but clearly way out of his element... when i was leaving i did the standard “thanks have a nice night” and he responded with “you too enjoy your... (very very quietly obviously realising what he was saying was highly insane) gender...” and tbh i havent stopped thinking abt being a gender enjoyer since

[omghotmemes]

The emotions involved in this story

[zzii-lch-deactivated20211226]

[ivan-fyodorovich-deactivated202]

though I still love Chronicles of Narnia the older I get and the more I learn the clearer it becomes to me why it would have driven Tolkien completely insane

[off-brandhipster]

The Santa part almost ruined their friendship

[ivan-fyodorovich-deactivated202]

Tolkien: you can’t just patch random things together because you like them, everything has to fit together in a dense textural weave of reasonable causes and effects

Lewis: and then the witch from the other dimension turns the fox to stone for having a contraband tea party …

[intjint]

Tolkein is the nerd that complains that characters’ costumes and weapons are impractical and Lewis is the nerd that thinks the designs fuck

[bespectacled-ghost]

[prokopetz]

Trainability in cats is a funny thing.

My cats understand and will obey a number of verbal commands, one of which is “go away”. I don’t use it often, but if they’re bugging me and I’m trying to work or doing something that could be dangerous for cats, I can tell them to go away, and off they go - they’ll only keep pestering me if there’s a serious problem they need me to look at.

That said, their idea of a serious problem that requires my attention is somewhat eccentric. Previous instances have included:

There was an unfamiliar car parked across the street

Their water bowl was four inches to the left of its usual position

One of them had puked on the stairs and they didn’t want to walk past it

It was raining

One of them saw a weird bug

[hollowedskin]

These are all very important things that required your attention. They’re doing a good job.

[blenderweaselhasopinions]

Dogs really aren’t much better.  I teach all my dogs the command “show me”.  How it works is if the dog needs something but I’m having trouble understanding what exactly they’re trying to tell me, I say “show me” and they lead me to whatever the problem is.  Usually they lead me to a real problem (like a toy that got stuck under the couch, their water bowl is empty, etc).  But sometimes they want me to fix things like this-

They pulled the covers off my bed and now they want me to put the covers back

They put their ball on top of the ottoman but the ottoman won’t throw it for them

The cat is sleeping and won’t chase them

A flower fell off the potted plant

The cat is sitting in a box and they don’t like it

One of them lost their bandana

The cat won’t take the toy they’re trying to give her

The cat DID take the toy they gave her and now they want it back

[thouroghly-inconsequential]

These are all very important things that required your attention. They’re doing a good job.