lesbian jesus

just like me, they long to be, close to you 《slommey || he/him || 21》

[kittenslurpingmilk-deactivated2]

[redstonedust]

havent talked to friend in a while and dont know how to start up a conversation? consider succumbing to the darkness in your heart and becoming a tragic miniboss for them to fight with the power of friendship. works every time.

[physiqueandfantasy]

Congratulations card

made by me!

soon to be available as a greeting card

[catsi]

in grade 12 we were reading romeo and juliet and we were at the romantic-ass balcony scene and this hot girl in the class volunteered to read juliet’s parts and i put up my hand to volunteer for another part and the teacher goes ‘oh do you want to be the nurse, amanda?’ and i was like ‘no i wanna be romeo’ and the hot girl swiveled around in her seat to give me a Look™

she and i later ended up making out at a bunch of parties in university lmfao

[catsi]

in retrospect this moment was absolutely pivotal to my butch awakening but it was also just a lesbian power move

[eyeballs-2-entrails]

I too got a girlfriend over this play. In grade 10, I was reading the balcony scene to study with two other people (one guy and one beautiful girl) and I insisted point blank I had to read as romeo, because he had the most lines and I’m a dramatic little shit.

So the other two in my group are used to my antics by now. We’re all friends, so the pair of them decide that the one guy in our group gets to be the nurse. Now, my Juliet and I have been friends for a couple months by this point, so I decide to be a little more dramatic.

We put Juliet on a spinny chair, and pump it up as tall as it goes, and my baby, closeted lesbian ass crouches on the floor, ready to be as melodramatic as possible. Like, I’m about to do a rendition that makes William himself walk into the class and tell me to take it back a notch or twelve.

And then I look up.

And holy shit.

There she is, Juliet, haloed in the worst fluorescent light known to mortals across the globe. Light just streaming down around her, that weird off-green colour that it always is. And she’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. My little gay soul is barely holding on as the words barely leave my lips, breathlessly. “But soft… what light from yonder window breaks?”

And Juliet was the sun. Romeo was not exaggerating that line at all.

Juliet and I have also been together for more than 4 years now. She’s every bit as spectacular as she was when I was a lovestruck teenage Romeo, kneeling on the yellowed linoleum floor of second block english.

[rebakitt3n]

[7dmom]

I come here for sweet digital delights and many of you don't give that to me

[second-time-around]

very 🥰🥰🥰 when musicians leave bits in songs where they're saying 'is this thing on?' or 'it's still recording y'know.' chairs scraping, retuning guitars, saying 'let's do that bit again', 'was that take any good?'

[xtec]

This is what the average YouTube thumbnail looks like now

[noneuclideangarf]

spent too long on this

[deepinourengines]

unclean = adj. of or pertaining to uncles

[default-cube]

who up wasting their only shot at life through complete and utter inaction

[dredsina]

Ive said this before but swear the biggest skill to learn as an adult is how to resist high-pressure sales tactics. You do NOT have to answer questions with anything other than "Sorry I'm not interested." No matter how nice they are or no matter how many follow up questions they ask or even how agitated they get when you stand your ground. Just keep saying I'm not interested. Don't answer their questions. Don't give them an opening to try to push back on your reasons. Be a fucking brick wall of I'm not interested.

[sweaterkittensahoy]

When we bought our car, I told Sean to let me handle it. I walked in and said "We have X for a down payment and cannot pay more than Y in monthly payments." My Y number had some leeway, but I didn't mention that.

First thing the sales guy did after I laid down the rules was turn to Sean and go, "What's your number?" And Sean said. "Oh, no, you negotiate with Gayle."

So, strike one for the sales guy. Could not divide and conquer us by implying THE MAN would not surprised at what I laid down.

Sales guy then had to confer with his manager and left us at his desk for several minutes. I have a vague recollection (this was 16 years ago) of Sean and I amusing ourselves doing bits about the other people there to look at cars. I am sure we did not give off the stressed or nervous energy they were hoping for.

Guy comes back. His first offer is fifty dollars a month more than I told him we could pay. I looked at him and said "I gave you our upper limit."

"Well, but what's another 50 bucks a month?"

"Something I can't afford."

He didn't know what to do with my open and unashamed admittal that I had a budget because my money was finite.

He went back to talk to the manager again.

It took two more rounds of "I told you what I can afford" before he finally came back 20 bucks under what I'd stated as my max.

The trick to resisting high-stress sales tactics is doing the math at home, knowing exactly what you can afford, and then walking into the room and stating that number minus 15%. Then refusing to budge from that number. Never, ever, meet then where they want. Always meet them where you want. Because at the end of the day, you can walk away and go somewhere else and say "I told the people at Z what my terms were, and they refused to work with me. Here are my terms. Meet them, and you make a sale today."

[strawberry-crocodile]

for real tho it feels exhausting that ive seen this whole "woman should be allowed to abstain from X beauty standard" -> "i perform X beauty standard, am i evil? do you think im evil? please forgive me i came up with a dozen excuses 🥺" since like 2015 (and i know its been going on longer than that) like girl thats not the poiiiiint

[strawberry-crocodile]

look me in the eyes. repeat after me. "i face societal pressure to perform this beauty standard. i should not face that pressure. i conform to this standard. i am rewarded for performing to this standard. i need to respect women who do not perform this standard. this is not about whether or not i am a sinner for wearing makeup."

[leshermes]

Jasmine Vine, lead programmer of Hollow Knight & Silksong just transitioned!! I'm so happy for her!❤️🏳️‍⚧️

[c-rowlesdraws]

her bluesky header & icon are so cute too 🥰

[charl0ttan]

[enki2]

[mysticalcoffeequeen]

When you thought it would be easy peasy lemon squeezy but it turns out to be difficult difficult lemon difficult.

[switchnx]

Wait that’s actually really good, gonna pop this out of the tags

[itsreallystupid]

[teaboot]

[strawberrycatcrowbar]

[no-one-offical]

‎

[mimosa-sexypeople-contests-2026]

Not the citrus scale I was looking for but I like it

[sjweminem]

folks makin those PSA posts against shipping real life celebrities treat rpf like it kills them and im like if pete wentz gets distressed when i post about him getting blasted in the ass he can go look at his bank account to feel better

[hawlucha]

hey gamers post your rigs

[eva-420]

[sharkosupreme-deactivated201911]

[captainsnoop-deactivated2020041]

[feldip-hills-deactivated2019022]

[justadeletedblog-deactivated202]

[starcunning]

[vaknosh]

https://www.reddit.com/r/shittybattlestations/

[girlballs-archive]

captain picker isgonna finger himself

[girlballs-archive]

his wife is. 44 years old.

[despazito]

The fucking that old man website when someone actually fucks that old man

[the-unnecessary-commentary]

[alexandersfolly]

Tumblr is stuffed to the brim with 18-25 year olds who talk endlessly about being a hole for old men and have a heart attack the second a consenting adult is in a relationship with an old man