Cassiopeia RA h 13m 58s D 58°35' @acanismajoris - Tumblr Blog

997

whoever did this needs to get

a raise

fired

narionblack-deactivated20210930

You think you’re A WISE OLD MYSTIC but really you’re just a EMO GHOST…..

Oh shit

ragebaitingmyfatdogpt20

Massachusetts is an SCP now and honestly they’re right

conceptsandimages

god i fucking love the scp foundation

Minerals Make Life is a National Mining Association initiative created to share information about domestic minerals mining and its importanc

Just for funsies

#i am le gold #a thing we did at work

www.twitch.tv/jopine

just watch the live stream

claireredfieid

LINK & MARIN

Kitty cat photos. I love my Andi

Hour and a half of payment for studio time to start this

charlesoberonn

Future Grandkid: Grandpa, what was it like when Obama was president?

Me: Aah, yes… the Homestuck President.

fozby

what the shit does that mean

charlesoberonn

I see all of you people who had this post queue’d for 4/13. Good job.

animorphsdaily

“❮You guys had better back off a little,❯ I said. ‘Not too far,’ Jake said. ‘We have to be able to get between you and Fluffer fast.’ ❮Oh, I can kick Fluffer’s butt,❯ I said, joking. I guess I felt a little embarrassed about having let the shrew take control of me. 'Uh-huh,’ Marco said dryly. 'Cat versus mouse. Who would you bet on?’ 'Haven’t you ever seen Itchy and Scratchy?’ Cassie asked. 'Mouse, definitely. Besides, she’s not a mouse.’”

— Book #2: The Visitor (Rachel), pg. 62 (by K.A. Applegate)

acanismajoris

Cassie got Rachel’s back

lynati

acanismajoris

I read this as bald and was very confused

mens-rights-activia

I wonder what Christian meme groups are like. I mean some Christians have the biggest victim complexes in the world and if you couple that with first person perspective memes, you’d probably get memes like:

oppositionresearch

Oh thank fuck it is my time to shine

These are all from a Christian meme group that I joined for some reason but fell in love with

what-even-is-thiss

I’ve been consuming Christian memes since I was about fourteen and they’re all like this. Also:

gay-hrothgars

May I add:

lladcy

ok i spent hours looking through christian discord servers for these

tacodarp

Some personal favorites I’ve encountered

rosslynpaladin

I’m not sure if any of these count as blasphemy exactly but happy sunday yall.

amydiddle

This goes so well with what my mother says.

‘God has to have a sense of humor or else he wouldn’t have created us.”

mistresskabooms

Listen I know I’m Jewish but this shit is too fucking funny for me not to reblog

sprinklesfreak

mother 3: so we have this system where you can attack in beat with the music for combos! no worries, it’s really simple and easy to understand! have fun :)

mother 3: this song is in 29/16

xerxestexastoast

From the Brawl BRSTMs YouTube description:

amtrax

*cries in musician*

shadowysiren

for context This, it the 71907/40120 song.

mother 3: yeah you just gotta do combos with the rhythm its easy!

also mother 3: *whatever this is*

jewishdragon

What the actual fuck

jelloapocalypse

“Alright guys, the Masked Man is one of the toughest opponents in the game. How do we make this battle difficult?”

“Alien time signature”

vulcandroid

i will never be over the fact that during first contact a human offered their hand to a vulcan and the vulcan was just like “wow humans are fucking wild” and took it

roachpatrol

Humanity’s first contact with Vulcans was some guy going “I’m down to fuck.”

Vulcans’ first contact with Humans was an emphatic “Sure.”

lilian-cho

@sineala

star-lord

#iiiiiiiiiiiiii mean vulcans had been watching humans for a long time#they knew the significance of a handshake but still#they had to find some fast and loose ambassador#willing to fuckin make out with a human for the sake of not offending them on first contact#lmao#star trek give me the story of this fast and loose vulcan

moonsofavalon

“sir…these…these humans…they greet each other by…” *glances around before furtively whispering* “by clasping hands…”

*prolonged silence* “oh my…”

“sir…sir how will we make first contact with them? surely we…we cannot refuse this handclasping ritual, they will take it as an insult, but what vulcan would agree to such a distasteful and uncomfortable ritual??”

*several pensive moments later* “contact the vulcan high command and tell them to send us kuvak. i once saw that crazy son of a bitch arm wrestle a klingon, he’ll put his hands on anything”

evilminji

Elsewhere, w/ kuvak: “….my day has come.”

lierdumoa

The vulcan who made first contact with humans is named Solkar guys. Y’all just be makin’ up names for characters that already have names.

Bonus: here’s a screencap of Solkar doing the “my body is ready” pose right before he shakes Zefram Cochrane’s hand:

adreadfulidea-deactivated202402

I swear Vulcans only come in two types and they are “distant xenophobes” or “horny on main for humanity”. Also apparently this guy is Spock’s great-grandfather and frankly that explains everything.

kaijuerotica

Hey so I looked into this at one point and that handshake literally created a lifelong telepathic bond between the two of them, and basically all of Solkar’s descendants were later obsessed with humans, including freaking SPOCK, so I’m not saying that handshake was so gay and good that it created an intergenerational telepathic bond between Solkar’s descendants and humans, but I’m also not….not….saying that.

tanukiham

actual footage of first contact makeouts

saucefactory-deactivated2019103

The slow deliberation with which Solkar takes Cockrane’s–I’m sorry, Cochrane’s–hand… The sheer sensuality witch which Solkar infuses an otherwise borderline impersonal social ritual… It clearly shows a very conscious knowledge, on Solkar’s part, of what the significance of the handshake is in Vulcan terms and of how affected he is by it.

That’s why he’s so slow in doing it, and so sensual. A part of Solkar can’t believe this is happening, despite it being a perfectly logical thing to expect from a human, and the rest of him can’t believe how good it is.

I bet that if the camera zoomed in any further we would see the dilation of Solkar’s pupils and a quickly-repressed shiver of delight. Cochrane’s firm, businesslike clasp is probably (in sexual terms) being perceived as a deliciously carnal display of dominance.

No wonder Solkar is all like, “TAKE ME, YOU WILD-MANNERED BARBARIAN WITH ENTICINGLY ROUGH CALLUSES.”

explorerrowan

And so we find out that yes, there is such a thing as bottoming in Pon-farr.

zinglebert-bembledack

Every time this post comes round my dash, it just gets better.

gallifreyanwriter

#somehow the idea of vulcans being Horny On Main always gives me the giggles#like literally all they had to do#was be like actually#hand contact is very intimate for our species#and im p sure humanity as a whole would not find that insurmountably weird#there are human cultures that dont shake hands#vulcans are logical enough to think that through on their own#so clearly that vulcan was just down to fuck#down to fuck in a public#professional diplomatic situation no less#and he did not fucking care who knew it (via kittykatthetacodemon)