Never not thinking about the trans woman I met in a gay bar in a town I'll never go back to who said "gender roles are like chains, fun to use in bondage scenarios but largely irrelevant in daily life"

bliss lane

tannertan36

#extradirty
šŖ¼

pixel skylines
The Bright Sessions
š
Fieri Frames
Show & Tell

Game Changer & Make Some Noise
hello vonnie
sheepfilms
occasionally subtle

Love Begins

romaā
Aqua Utopiaļ½ęµ·ć®åŗć§čØę¶ćē“”ć

oozey mess
RMH

Origami Around
noise dept.
seen from Jordan

seen from United States
seen from Türkiye

seen from Poland

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from Canada
seen from Israel
seen from Indonesia

seen from Canada
seen from Japan

seen from United States
seen from Venezuela

seen from Malaysia

seen from Sweden

seen from United States
@adhd-emt
Never not thinking about the trans woman I met in a gay bar in a town I'll never go back to who said "gender roles are like chains, fun to use in bondage scenarios but largely irrelevant in daily life"
Thank you all, i needed further explanation - And i do find it might help me!
this lab safety training module is sending me
I feel like whoever wrote these questions was speaking from experience
The tech at the abortion clinic who said, "you're 10 weeks, we're gonna say 8.5, okay?" literally SAVED MY LIFE
The older lady who saw me working the theater district and without a word slipped me a 20, SAVED MY LIFE
The nurse at the ER who refused to buy my bullshit story when I walked in and said I needed STD prophylaxis- she SAVED MY LIFE
The other victims I met while being trafficked, the older girl who told me, "shut the fuck up, don't posture like that," she SAVED MY LIFE
Even the young guy who was in with the traffickers, who got in over his head and snuck us oreos and cheez-its- he SAVED LIVES
The other survivors I've met in the aftermath who have listened and shared their wisdom- they've SAVED LIVES
You know who's never come close to saving my life? The cops. The court system. The Feds. Wider society as a whole, even. I've never been helped or cared for by these systems. I've been helped and cared for by PEOPLE. By regular human people who were all just doing their best.
More than it's ever haunted me that these awful systems and evil people exist, it haunts me that I'll never be able to thank any of those good people who've saved me. It haunts me that they'll never know how much of an impact they've made. The way I repay them is to try to bring that same energy into the world- and maybe do the same for others without even knowing it.
I think we're naive to look to something massive and uncaring to save us, when we've always been quietly and dutifully saving each other.
its bonkers that its like. public knowledge. to the point of being a trope. that all cops hate internal affairs. and people still try to act like cops are capable of morality.
popular media has done an excellent job convincing the public that the job of an internal affairs department is to make sure billybob the baby murderer gets away so he can kill more babies instead of like. double checking that the cops are respecting peoples most basic human rights. which they aren't.
Me: I don't know, maybe I was overstating how bad my migraines are to the neurologist. :-/
My best friend:
#THIS BITCH #do you know how many times a week this winter she got a migraine??? #Or this spring? #THIS SUMMER? #CALL OUT POST#between this and 'well maybe I don't have asthma and am just choosing to wheeze for aesthetic purposes' #I will be inflicting one million 'well maybe I could talk if I just tried harder' DON'T TEST ME (tags via @arinrowan)
Arin did you just turn MY post into a callout post?
Crawling out of the well of deep tumblr for the purpose, yes
#for every note this gets op has 1(one) day where she's not allowed to say maybe her disabilities what disable her are fake or made up (@arinrowan again)
I don't think you can do that?
Can I do that?
Yes
No
Oh but good news, she ended up getting the abortion anyway by convincing the doctors and using her power as a rich white woman. She literally tried to call DeSantis to...get him to back her up, I guess? It totally wasn't an abortion though, it was a "medically-assisted miscarriage".
Feels like a good time to repost this essay by Joyce Arthur:
When the Anti-Choice Choose By Joyce Arthur Copyright Ā© September, 2000 Available in a German translation Available in a Russian translation
In much of America, a private company knows where you drive. It knows when you leave the house, which roads you take, what time you come home -- logging your car's movements through a network of AI cameras that scan some 20 billion license plates a month, in more than 6,000 communities across the country, and store them in a database police can search without a warrant. It is the kind of mass surveillance Americans tend to associate with authoritarian states like China -- yet it has been built here, in only about seven years, by a private company, with little public debate and almost no oversight. And it has become, in the hands of the wrong people, a nearly perfect tool for stalking women.
For months, Marci Bakely could not understand how her ex-boyfriend always seemed to know where she was. He would text her about a doctor's appointment, a date, a run to the grocery store -- sometimes within minutes -- though he lived and worked fifteen miles away. The 50-year-old Air Force veteran installed three cameras around her home to see if he was staking out her cul-de-sac. She bought a hidden-camera detector and waved it down every wall. Three times, she drove her car to a mechanic and asked him to scan it for trackers.
The answer, when it came, was worse than a tracker: her ex was a police chief, and he was watching her through Flock -- the private company whose license-plate cameras now blanket thousands of American communities. By the time she knew what was happening, Michael Steffman had searched her license plate, and her teenage daughter's, roughly 600 times. He was arrested in November on charges of stalking, harassment, and misusing the license-plate system; in April, before he could stand trial, he was found dead at his home, in what officials said was a suicide.
Bakely's case is not an outlier. A new Washington Post investigation has identified at least 50 law-enforcement officers charged or accused of misusing license-plate readers for unauthorized purposes. In 26 of those cases, investigators and prosecutors said the officers used the technology to spy on their wives, their girlfriends, their exes, their exes' new partners, or women they wanted to meet. Flock's system was involved in most of them, and it made the surveillance nearly effortless: no warrant, no case number, just a plate number typed into a search bar and, moments later, a map is generated of where someone had been.
The 50 documented cases are almost certainly a fraction of the real number, because the system is built in a way that keeps its own misuse hidden. Search logs are held by individual police departments, and only some have ever been released through public-records requests, so most people have no way of knowing whether their car has been tracked. When an advocacy group in Joplin, Missouri, obtained its local logs, it found that 85% of searches were justified with a single word -- "suspicious," "drugs" -- and that fewer than 3% were tied to a criminal case.
The safeguards that might catch abuse, like requiring a case number or auditing officers' searches, are optional, and most departments leave them switched off. Many logs are never reviewed at all. The women who do find out tend to learn by accident -- a call from an internal-affairs investigator, or a search of their own plate through a website called Have I Been Flocked.
The records tell the same story in city after city: a man with a badge using a national surveillance system to trace the movements of a woman trying to get away from him. In Wisconsin, an officer allegedly used Flock to check whether his ex-girlfriend had gone to an abortion clinic, then contacted the clinic to try to obtain her medical records and began calling her as many as nineteen times a day. In Texas, an officer ran a woman's plate through more than eighty thousand cameras across the country to track her down after she had an abortion.
In Kansas, a police lieutenant tracked his ex-wife to the day-care center where she took their children -- a location she had deliberately kept from him. In Florida, an officer video-called his girlfriend to show her footage of herself driving, then came to her apartment, grabbed her, and reminded her that he carried a gun. When she threatened to call the police, he told her, "The police are already here."
That is the particular terror of it: the man doing the stalking is often the institution a woman would call for help. "Where do you go as a victim if you're being abused?" said Adam Dodge, founder of the cyber-safety group EndTAB. "You go to law enforcement, right?"
Eva Galperin, who directs cybersecurity at the Electronic Frontier Foundation, described what the tool gives an abuser. "The goal of the abuser is to make themselves seem omniscient and omnipotent," she said. "You don't have to be watching your victim all the time. They just have to believe that at any moment you could be." The women describe living inside exactly that fear -- watched, unable to prove it, uncertain which cameras were his eyes. Some stopped leaving the house. Some began borrowing their relatives' cars.
The ones who reported it have often been waved off. Bakely filed for a restraining order against Steffman, and a judge denied it, ruling that his conduct was "concerning" but that she could not prove ongoing stalking. In Pennsylvania, Alexandria Griffith warned her local police department and the district attorney's office that her officer husband was tracking and threatening her, and says both dismissed her. Days later, she says, he came to her parents' home with a gun and shoved her and her four-year-old son. "A lot of people knew that all of this was happening," she said, "and they kind of just brushed me off."
Where accountability came at all, it came unevenly: officers kept their access after being warned, and in some states the misuse is not even a crime. In Idaho, a sheriff who searched for his wife's car several times a day faced no charges, because misusing a license-plate reader there is not, on its own, illegal.
The company that built the network has decided this is not its concern. In barely seven years, Flock has grown from a single camera its founder rigged out of an Android phone in a rainproof box into a mass-surveillance network valued at over seven billion dollars -- one most Americans have never heard of, backed by some of Silicon Valley's most powerful investors. Accountability to the millions of Americans whose movements it records appears to weigh far less on the company than its own growth. In the case of the documented abuse of its system for stalking, Flock has largely disowned the problem.
"We're not going to change humans, and humans make bad decisions," its chief executive, Garrett Langley, told the Post. Asked whether the company should do more to restrict how officers use the tool, he has been plainer: "I don't think it's our job to police the police." One of Flock's investors, the venture capitalist David Ulevitch, called the more than forty documented misuse cases "truly a nonissue."
A company that has assembled one of the most detailed records of Americans' movements ever created has looked at the women its product helps stalk and seen a cost worth absorbing.
Nor is the company's response to criticism merely passive. A confidential guide Flock distributes to police departments, obtained by the technology outlet 404 Media, coaches agencies on how to defuse public opposition before it can form -- advising officers to brief city officials privately, before residents ever reach a public comment period, and to "own the narrative before someone else does."
On the specific charge that its cameras enable mass surveillance, the guide counsels police not to bother denying it -- "you're not going to convince opponents that it's not," it says -- but to change the subject to public safety. The same company that calls the abuse of its system a matter for others to police has written a playbook for steering communities past the scrutiny that might expose it.
That scrutiny is coming anyway. Between the summer of 2021 and this spring, 82 Flock contracts were canceled across 28 states, 39 of them in the first five months of this year alone. The ACLU has mounted a national campaign it calls "Get the Flock Out"; in Harrisonburg, Virginia, the city council voted to bag the cameras in trash until they could be removed; in a small Texas town, residents simply sawed one down.
Still the network grows, because growth is the whole design -- every new camera makes the system more powerful, more valuable, and harder to escape. For the women already inside it, none of this was ever abstract. Bakely, who learned that the man tracking her every move ran the police force she might otherwise have called, put the problem simply: "Who do you turn the chief of police in to?"
------
No one should be able to track a woman's every movement without consequence -- and ordinary citizens shouldn't have their movements tracked and recorded by a private, unaccountable company. Here's how to protect yourself and push back. Here's how to protect yourself and push back.
--> To read the Washington Post investigation that documented how police officers across the country have misused license-plate readers to stalk women, visit https://wapo.st/4xGdGUj
--> Most communities adopted these cameras with little public debate, and local officials have the power to change that. Contact your city council or county board and ask whether your community contracts with Flock or another license-plate-reader company; whether officers must log a criminal case number for every search; and whether anyone audits those searches. Ask them to require warrants, mandate audits, or end the contract.
--> The ACLU's "Get the Flock Out" campaign helps residents find out whether their community uses these cameras and push for change, and includes a step-by-step guide for fighting Flock contracts and model policies for local officials at https://www.aclu.org/campaigns-initiatives/get-the-flock-out
--> From August 16 to 22, the grassroots project DeFlock is coordinating a National Week of Action Against license-plate readers -- town halls, community meetings, and events in cities across the country, with an organizing toolkit for anyone who wants to take part. Find events and resources at https://www.noalprs.com, and see whether cameras have been mapped in your area at https://deflock.me
--> To find out whether your own license plate has been searched in Flock's system, you can look it up at https://haveibeenflocked.com
--> For more on how license-plate readers and other street-level surveillance work -- and how communities are responding -- see the Electronic Frontier Foundation's Street-Level Surveillance project at https://www.eff.org/issues/street-level-surveillance
--> If you or someone you know is being stalked or is experiencing domestic violence, the National Domestic Violence Hotline offers free, confidential support 24 hours a day at 1-800-799-7233, or text "START" to 88788. For help specifically with technology-enabled abuse -- tracking, surveillance, and stalking through devices or data -- the Safety Net project at the National Network to End Domestic Violence offers survivor resources at https://www.techsafety.org
---
- For a deeply reported look at how private data companies and government agencies have quietly built an American surveillance state -- the larger system that networks like Flock's are part of -- we recommend "Means of Control: How the Hidden Alliance of Tech and Government Is Creating a New American Surveillance State" at https://bookshop.org/a/8011/9780593443224 (Bookshop) and https://amzn.to/4z6wXjd (Amazon)
- For a detailed account of how private companies came to harvest and profit from the details of our lives, we recommend "The Age of Surveillance Capitalism" at https://bookshop.org/a/8011/9781541758001 (Bookshop) and https://amzn.to/4xnIOaQ (Amazon)
- For a potentially life-saving book for older teens and adults about the early warning signs of abusive relationships, myths about abusive personalities, and how to get help, we highly recommend "Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men" at https://www.amightygirl.com/why-does-he-do-that
---
- For more on Flock's strategy for managing public opposition to its cameras, see Tech Times at https://www.techtimes.com/articles/322909/20260804/flock-safety-coaches-police-own-narrative-before-citizens-can-speak.htm
- To read more about the Texas officer who searched tens of thousands of cameras to track a woman after she had an abortion, see the Electronic Frontier Foundation at https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2025/05/she-got-abortion-so-texas-cop-used-83000-cameras-track-her-down
I started using Head and Shoulders ten years ago for itchy scalp and dandruff, and then for ten years I have not had itchy scalp and dandruff, so I thought āwhy do I still buy shampoo to combat itchy scalp and dandruff when I do not have itchy scalp and dandruff,ā so I stopped buying the shampoo for itchy scalp and dandruff and can you guess I have now? Can you predict what currently afflicts me? Itās alright if you canāt because apparently I fuckin couldnāt either
Cutting something out of your life because you think you donāt need it any more only to realize that it was in fact working as intended and preventing a problem that will return should you stop doing this is a good experiment to run periodically with something small like dandruff shampoo, lest you start to think it would be a good idea to do this with like letās say public health and the social safety net and vaccines
I had a liver transplant when I was 14 and like six months later I was chatting with my surgeon and he said āthereās gonna come a time, probably when youāre a teenager, where youāre gonna think, āI feel great, why am I still taking all this medication? I havenāt needed it in years.ā and youāre gonna want to stop taking all this medication. Guess whatās gonna happen then? Youāre gonna go into rejection and your liver is gonna start failing, and youāre gonna be dying again, and weāre gonna have to find you another liver. So donāt do that.ā And I said āwhy the fuck would anyone do that?ā and he said āpeople are stupid.ā
every once in a while when I get annoyed by a pharmacy or donāt wanna get out of bed to do my drugs I think āugh, this is dumb, why do I do this?ā and that conversation slams into me like a truck and I remember that I am, in fact, stupid
#you are not immune to the recency bias(via@arrows-for-pens)
Every person on earth needs to read this post. It will make peopleās lives a lot better and lessen the crises everyone faces in day-to-day lives.
I reblog this every time I see it because I am not immune to the recency bias
I genuinely wish people would stop engaging in algospeak when it comes to topics where discussion can legitimately be diluted by it. I don't know how to drill it into your head that censoring "rape" and "sexual assault" is extremely counterproductive no matter how much discomfort reading the words brings you.
Reminder:
LRADs, a sound-producing device used to control crowds, can inflict permanent damage on subjects
the important thing to remember about corporations is that they are so so stupid
this post brought to you by my ex employer claiming that they can't have done disability discrimination against me because there's no proof I had PTSD in January 2025, although they do admit I had it both four months before and six months after that
asked my lawyer if this was the dumbest thing she'd ever seen and she gave me the ol' dead eyed stare that has watched a thousand civilisations fall
i think its a lil sad how often people will like restrain themselves from exploring new identities and hobbies because they don't want it to be an "embarrassing phase" because honestly i think its way cooler to have a diverse and varied lifestyle that you can look back on and say "omg i used to love doing that!" and apply those skills and interests to something else.
tbh the first step of recovery is to stop feeling kind of proud about how fucked up you are. your martyr complex is not an endearing quirk itās the fatal flaw that makes your friends feel like garbage and will sabotage your whole life.
OceanGate, the deep-sea exploration company that created the Titan submersible, has removed its Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and LinkedIn a
poor things, well we should definitely make this easier on them by never repeatedly mentioning their name and deeds on the "reblog things forever" website
yea that'd be a shame
by the way, just so everyone knows what not to do, shift+r reblogs a post instantly
just make sure you don't reblog anything about oceangate because that would completely undermine their entire plan ššš
You also shouldn't queue a post, that would make people keep remembering this post for a longer time, which is the opposite of forgetting