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[catgirltitties]

.

[explicitlyrics]

swifties always going on the "you just hate women" defense like first of all Taylor Swift is not a woman she's an unskippable ad

[loth-caatgirl]

actually yes this needs to be kept as part of this conversation

[charlesoberonn]

Does toph know that zuko has a scar

Would be funny if she only found out after asking to touch his face.

She'd be super upset at him and the gaang for not telling her.

[charlesoberonn]

She'd march straight to the Fire Nation prison with murderous intent after finding out how he got it.

[cryoverkiltmilk]

"My favorite thing about the Fire Nation?

None of the cages are wooden."

*sounds of horrible metallic shrieking*

[meangirlnurse]

apparently at some point when my now-girlfriend and i were flirting with each other but not quite in a relationship, she asked me how i felt about pet names, to which i replied “well you have to call them something” 

[meangirlnurse]

the fact that i have managed to end up in a relationship is really testament to my girlfriend’s patience 

[meangirlnurse]

#your girlfriend is a moronsexual op

please don’t call my girlfriend a moron :( 

[meangirlnurse]

wait

[evilkitten3]

now that i think about it, jonathan harker would’ve been a great character in frankenstein. he’s so completely oblivious to dracula’s red flag parade that he’d probably completely avert the creature’s murderous rampage by accidentally befriending him after spending a page and a half writing about some weirdly tall homeless guy with daddy issues he ran into

[unfried-mouth-wheat]

“I’ve met the most peculiar man today. He was far taller in height than I have ever witnessed before. His face gave off a general sense of ugliness, though I cant quite place why considering he seems to be quite handsome when not in animation. A multitude of scars seemed to cover his body, perhaps from a terrible accident and the subsistent surgeries. I’ve noticed that he always looks close to crying. When i asked his name, he replied, in length, that he had none. How queer! As he seemed fairly harmless, and rather in need, I invited him to accompany me on my passage to Count Dracula. He looked bewildered, but accepted. I know not whether he shall continue to accompany me when I return to Mina, but I’m quite certain she would never reject hospitality to so miserable a man!”

[unfried-mouth-wheat]

Also consider:

My dearest Margaret, so odd a stranger has joined my ship! I know nothing of him other than he seems to be some sort of European, like Victor, though not the same. He introduced himself as Count Dracula, and spoke with utmost clarity and mastery of the english language. Victor looked upon him in a rather fragile state and cried out.

“Is one demon not enough for my so miserable life? Must another specter haunt my every waking hour, even now as I am so wretched? Oh, save me Walton, save me! The devil comes near, and he dost wish to smother all hope of respite and tranquility!”

Saying such, he leaped from where he was seated on the deck, and promptly fainted. I apologized for my friend’s behavior and brought Victor back to my cabin.

Sincerely, your confused brother, Robert. W

[brain-depositary]

You know, considering Victor’s extensive experience with dismembering dead bodies and reanimating and the fact that his problem for his entire book was that he didn’t think anyone would believe him, I do sincerely think that Frankenstein would catch onto Dracula’s deal at once and immediately make it everyone else’s problem.

[evilkitten3]

victor accidentally fucking up dracula while jonathan accidentally un-fucks up the creature? sign me the hell up!

[brain-depositary]

All these posts declaring that Victor would only be able to cry and faint at Dracula seem to forget that his first meeting with his creature started with him hurling insults and trying to fistfight the 8 ft tall supernatural brick shithouse of muscle while having the constitution of a consumptive heroine so like while this absolutely wouldn’t bode well for his long term survival in Dracula’s castle you’ve gotta admit it would be way funnier.

Essentially the creature would find the one guy who’s too polite to say anything about his appearance while Dracula to his horror would have met the one man in the world who’s even more of a fucking nightmare to deal with than him.

[brain-depositary]

Frankenstein, eyes bloodshot and probably on totally normal Victorian amounts of cocaine: “Hey buddy count I found all these fresh cadavers in your basement —“

Dracula: “Vait how did you find my cadavers”

Frankenstein: “Look, I need them for reasons and you just had them laying around and were obviously not using them and they’re peasants right? So —“

Dracula: “Vhat do you possibly need cadavers for?”

Frankenstein: “I already told you, REASONS! Anyway I can’t help but notice all of them are totally drained of blood and I need the blood.”

Dracula: “how are you getting them out of the ground so quickly, you’re like a hundred pounds soaking vet —“

Frankenstein: “THE BLOOD, Dracula. I need the BLOOD. WHERE THE FUCK IS THE BLOOD. TELL ME, DRAC.”

[brain-depositary]

Later:

Frankenstein: *long winded flowery speech about how Count Dracula is a fiendish devil and vile abomination etc for what he’s done to the corpses*

Dracula: My brother in Christ YOU’RE the one robbing MY graveyard!!!

Frankenstein: *suckerpunches him*

[evilkitten3]

you’re the only person on this post i trust. please never stop i love you

[themushroomgoesyeet]

This is the classical monster story crossover I need so badly, not whatever the hell van helsing is

[guerrillatech]

[charlesoberonn]

Every so often in the middle of the night, Grace remembers that his home is surrounded by a 210°C high-pressure toxic ammonia atmosphere.

That if it weren't for the diligent work of a dozen alien engineers and their miracle material, his home would experience a catastrophic structural failure and he'd be crushed and burned by 29 atmospheres of scalding gas.

Then he remembers Rocky and that he trusts him, and he feels better.

[light-camera-bitch-smile]

i love palamades sextus because it's like. he's "the greatest necromancer of his generation". he's jealous of an eighteen year old. he's in a codependant relationship with his cousin. he's writing erotic wlw fanfic on the wallpaper of his hallucinated River bubble. he rewrote known necrophysics. he was homewrecked. he finds those little outfits that nurses wear and strong work ethic and high test scores sexy. he's been in love with a woman seven years older than him since he was eight. he gave an ancient saint turbo cancer. he blew himself up. he's dead. he's alive. he's banned from selling erotic wlw fanfic he conceived in his necrophysically impossible River bubble. he's taking care of the dead soul of the earth in the body of a girl who lobotomized herself. he never forgets anything. and he isn't even technically the main character. NO ONE is doing it quite like him.

[prokopetz]

The fact that Aperture Science canonically has a gender-neutral, polyamory-friendly partnership policy isn't a joke about Cave Johnson being inexplicably pro-queer. It's because their corporate medical plan allows them to experiment on your spouse. More spouses means more test subjects. That's the joke.

[lemonsweet]

The other day my nephew described something as being "like if Slenderman was stuck in a little car" and I yelled YES!!!! bc I thought he was referencing this image I like but then I showed the picture and he was like how do you have an image for that where did you get that

[only-tiktoks]

[belovedgoofball]

[wanderer-chronicles]

[hartsnkises]

Alan Turing and Ada of Lovelace did not invent computer science for the girls and the gays to claim they can't do math

[bitcoitus]

Please remember that almost everyone around you is traumatized. I didn’t understand this when I was younger. I wondered why people acted so strangely and irrationally. Maybe all children wonder this. The author Robert Anton Wilson said (paraphrasing), “We have never seen a completely sane adult human.” No one makes it out of this life alive. It’s not their fault. Mercy, kindness, forgiving — these are what makes one human. They are other names for love. People break in the strangest of ways.

[bitcoitus]

“Under the present brutal and primitive conditions on this planet, every person you meet should be regarded as one of the walking wounded. we have never seen a man or woman not slightly deranged by either anxiety or grief. we have never seen a totally sane human being." — Robert Anton Wilson

[status-quo-hater]

I think one of the funniest abortion stances I've heard was from my parents neighbor. He's a like, hard-core libertarian viking larper guy who is very tall and very fat and very bald.

He believes a fetus is human with a soul, but also its "basically attacking the woman's body" so if she wants to get rid of it, that's "basically self-defense". He compared it to shooting a home invader. So he supports abortion not as healthcare, but as killing a baby in self-defense

[status-quo-hater]

Y'know I'm so glad someone reminded me of this. Because this was also discussed.

My stepmother did NOT like the way her Libertarian Viking Neighbor framed pregnancy as the fetus "attacking the woman". She incredulously told him this was extremely disrespectful to expectant mothers to portray pregnancy as so violent and negative.

Libertarian Viking Neighbor's response was that people consensually hurt each other all the time, and "there's like a whole community about that, with the acronym the one that starts with a B" And his reasoning was that if the mother was consenting to bring attacked by the baby, it in fact wasn't violent and negative because there was consent.

He brought up people consensually hurting each other, didn't go for one of the obvious answers like boxing or body mods or something, no he went STRAIGHT TO BDSM and he DIDN'T EVEN REMEMBER THE ACRONYM

[normalmammal]

I’m so pro abortion I feel insane hearing any other take on it

[normalmammal]

Even lefties I know will eventually concede to some situation where they think it’s right to force someone to carry a child against their will as if that’s not one of the most inhumane and cruel situations to put someone in regardless of any other factors

[abandonedography]

Old abandoned grocery store repurposed as a library

[certifiedlibraryposts]

Certified Library Post

[azzandra]

"Hey, we need to renovate this grocery store into a library."

"Okay, I got you."

*Removes the B from the BREAD sign*

"Done"

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

in hindsight, growing up as an aromantic person who didn't know aromanticism was a thing...it woulda been really easy for me to assume that something was wrong with me, that I was "broken" or "missing" some piece of humanity.

luckily I was autistic, oblivious, and had a huge ego. it literally never occurred to me to frame it as a "me" problem. i just thought every single person i knew was a dumbass

[panic-at-the-aromantic]

redstonedust AND biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist are aromantic??? are all the famous tumblrinas aromantic??

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

OKAY LISTEN