Xuebing Du
Sweet Seals For You, Always
tumblr dot com
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
NASA
hello vonnie
if i look back, i am lost
Love Begins
EXPECTATIONS
shark vs the universe
Andulka
The Bowery Presents
taylor price
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
roma★
PR's Tumblrdome
No title available
todays bird
Cookie Run:Kingdom Official!
Game Changer & Make Some Noise
seen from Canada
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from India
seen from United States
seen from Paraguay
seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Brazil
seen from Malaysia
seen from Brazil
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from Bolivia
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
@aroace-and-has-a-mace
shoutout to aromantics who feel sexual attraction
shoutout to asexuals who feel romantic attraction
shoutout to aromantic asexuals who don’t feel either but are in sexual/romantic relationships
shoutout to aromantic asexuals in queerplatonic relationships
shoutout to aromantic asexuals who don’t care for romantic/sexual relationships
shoutout to aromantic asexuals who are disgusted by romantic/sexual relationships
basically, shoutout to asexuals, aromantics, or any a-spec people
shoutout to gunpowder tim as wlw loki, gotta be one of my favorite genders
ah yes, dive team season has began. also known as, the time when i collect my favorite out-of-context quotes. so far we have:
“yeah, i’m married to her, she’s my husband”
“god has forsaken us, it’s time to do the veggie dance”
“listen, i didn’t MEAN to cartwheel”
“OH FU-“
“yes, mr. coach man”
“but like, she’s gay, so that’s cool”
“stop poking me i will throw this box at you”
“GOD i hate third graders”
“what can i say, i’m just built different”
“more like built wrong” (in response to the last one)
“nah bro’s bringing the hoes- NO WAIT I MEAN HOSE”
come on, don’t give me that face. seriously, stop giving me people’s faces. where do you even find these??
still think it’s unfair that this post only got one note me of many months ago was just funnier
this account has not been active in months but i’m just here to say that will wood’s music is definitely claimed by the Spiral. that’s all
spotify what the fuck what the fuck why would you play Euthanasia right after Tomcat Disposables i’m fucking sobbing
y’all know that one video of an edited version of i/me/myself where they switched the second and fourth beats? i think that video is peak will wood fan culture, simply because it gave me my favorite line ever.
‘goyfriend birlfriend’
do you think the Flesh could help trans people transition? time sensitive question.
glad that im not popular enough to have an evil shadow version of my blog that exists just to make contradictions on my posts
Do Not Do This To Me
if this post hits 200k im printing it out and eating it
Achievement Unlocked:
Daily Recommended Dose of Fiber
Make an ill-advised promise within earshot of a gimmick blog.
Quick someone add a fucked-up car so we can get @identifying-cars-in-posts
1976-1977 Oldsmobile Cutlass
That car is not messed up enough. Here.
@identifying-cars-in-posts
1981-1983 Delorean DMC-12
I'll write a hauiku as a comment on this post and hope the bot sees
I’ll write a hauiku
as a comment on this post
and hope the bot sees
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
@identifying-horses-in-posts
Pretty horse!
@i-say-ok
ok.
@cat-spotted
CAT SPOTTED!!☆ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ
Fine kitty appearing during our time of need! This Delightful beast only appears once every 1000 years for the small price of $2.50!
/200K
I choose @weirdly-specific-but-ok ! And it's effective!
the second i saw someone chose me for something i felt deep irrational fear. what eldritch demon is this site sacrificing me to now?
oh are we eating paper is that a thing because i am down baby
If someone asks what Tumblr is, show them this thread.
@turtleneck-crowley @ivankaramazov07 isn't this magic. :D :D ;D
TUMBLR IS HUMAN CULTURE AT ITS FINEST I TELL YOU THE DOCTOR WOULD BE PROUD TO SEE US IDIOTS. IVE SHENANID-ONCE, ILL SHENAN-AGAIN
to all those who got the ducktales reference, i send my love and kisses
I’m turning this into a picrew chain also guys lots of pressure
This is a Picrew made by Nuggts @.nuggts on TikTok You can use this Picrew as a profile picture or in a video etc. with credits! Do
Do it or the animatronics fucking get me also no I did not kill anyone what are you talking about
tags: @biscuits-lovely-corner @expresso4thedeppresso @funkingrn @aroacesigma @lastdivantruther @barracuda677 @pengumi12 @sulkystella @misschuchuw @someonebeatmetotheseusernames @blinksager @sav3yee @chuuyasboner @ur-local-remy-kinnie @urazayt @thelittleprinceconfirmed @gherkin-saute @vinylbiohazard @amioddlyart
tag all you moots this is not an option
also prev yes you @ivankaramazov07 I want you to do it as well
@probablyautism thnx for remembering the weirdest tumblrina on the planet. also can u explain to ur local grandma what she has to do(apologies are afoot)
So tap on the link above my character and simply make your own it could be an OC or you or your sona, anything.
ON IT BESTIE!
im here watching this lmao, funniest shit i seen
NOT THE KILGRAVE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
oh and @probablyautism here u go luv
CMON FOLKS
DO IT
here you are!!
@mystic-mae IM IN LOVE WITH YOUR PICREW!!!!!! beautiful business.
@weirdly-specific-but-ok @styx142 no pressue :)
Wild how I keep returning to this goddamn post. @queermarzipan ball's in your court babe.
It may still need help getting to 200,000.
Here's Aziraphale in disguise:
And here's a backstage shot of the Gentlemen in 1941 suits:
@tothechaos will you print and eat the entire post? If so, here is a long joke. Don't choke:
A man obsessed with trains finally steals one and immediately crashes it, killing several people.
At the trial, the man is found guilty of multiple murders and sentenced to death.
Before he faces his sentence, he’s offered a last meal, and asks for a single banana, which is given to him.
The next day, he’s led to the electric chair. They strap him in, pull the switch, and... nothing happens.
There’s never been a failure before. But because you cannot punish a person twice for the same crime, the court is forced to let him go free.
Within a week’s time, naturally, the man, who is obsessed with trains, goes and steals another one.
He doesn’t care that he can’t drive it or that he failed catastrophically before; he is obsessed with trains and his only desire is to operate one. As before, he crashes it, and kills several people.
Again, he stands trial, and again, he is sentenced to death, showing no remorse, only delight that he got to operate the train.
His last meal request is a single banana. When he goes to the chair, the executioner pulls the switch, but nothing happens. He goes free again.
The train-obsessed maniac, once more on the loose, wastes no time in hijacking a train and crashing it.
His trial is speedy, because this has already happened twice, and he is sentenced to death.
They ask him what he’d like for his last meal. “A single banana,” he says.
“Oh, no you don’t, you son of a bitch. We’re on to you, now. We know all about your little banana trick, and you’re not escaping this time!”
The guards refuse his request, and instead serve him a standard last meal of steak, potatoes, and berry cobbler.
The next morning they strap him into the electric chair, pull the switch, and... nothing happens.
“Did you give him the banana?” demands the head guard.
“No, sir! He asked for the banana but we didn’t give it to him, we swear!” says one of the guards.
Turns out the banana had nothing to do with anything. He was just a really bad conductor.
JEFF, CHANGE YOUR FUCKING URL
@writing-prompt-s
Quick! Gordon Ramsey has tasked you to come up with a new recipe with a rather special ingredient: 'this trainwreck of a Tumblr post printed out on paper'. You don't have much time as the exquisite guest will enter the doors of your fancy establishment the moment this post hits 200k notes. Come up with a recipe. Please provide detailed instructions.
Chaos Course Set Meal
Bespoke 9 course meal meant to be enjoyed by @tothechaos
Foreword:
As tasked by the prolific Gordan Ramsey, this 9 Course endeavour will feature the post in its entirety segmented into 9 delightfully ornate, unreasonably complex yet delectably unparalleled dishes. In the following, we'll see how to prepare each of these dishes.
Course One
Dish name: 10k notes of Hubris
10k Notes of Hubris is a simple risotto with saffron infusion and forest mushrooms, topped with shavings of the top 9th piece of this post, printed in full colour, regular stock. Due to the nature of a 9 course setting, it is wise to start with a simpler dish.
Ingredients (serves four people):
1 teaspoon of saffron
300g carnaroli rice
50g extra virgin olive oil
20g butter
5g shallots
1l vegetable broth
parsley (to taste)
100g porcini mushrooms
80g portobello mushrooms
100g brown mushrooms
5g truffle oil
5g lemon peel and lemon juice
30g parmesan cheese
thyme (a dash)
5g garlic
A pinch of salt and pepper
The first 9th of this post, printed in full colour with regular stock.
Method:
In a saucepan, pour the oil and the chopped shallot(s), then add the rice and saffron and toast
Pour the broth a little at a time and cook slowly. Allow to cook before adding salt and black pepper. Stir in butter, grated parmesan cheese, chopped parsley, truffle oil, lemon juice and peel.
In a separate saucepan, cook the mushrooms with oil, garlic, thyme, salt and black pepper.
Presentation:
At the base of the dish pour the risotto, complete with forest mushrooms and basil leaves. Shave the printed top 9th of the post and sprinkle on top. Drizzle a dash of olive oil before serving.
The next dish and recipe of this 9 course meal, complete with the next 9th of the post printed and incorporated, will be presented by another chef.
@one-time-i-dreamt @i-am-a-fish @pukicho
hi jeff (:
Love Tumblr so much, hmmm how can I contribute to this post??? SONG LYRICS!!
We're no strangers to love
You know the rules and so do I (do I)
A full commitment's what I'm thinking of
You wouldn't get this from any other guy
I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling
Gotta make you understand
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
We've known each other for so long
Your heart's been aching, but you're too shy to say it (say it)
Inside, we both know what's been going on (going on)
We know the game and we're gonna play it
And if you ask me how I'm feeling
Don't tell me you're too blind to see
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
We've known each other for so long
Your heart's been aching, but you're too shy to say it (to say it)
Inside, we both know what's been going on (going on)
We know the game and we're gonna play it
I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling
Gotta make you understand
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you
@capn-o-my-soul (bc you love to spam this kind of posts) @muzhda @finleyforevermore and @localcanadiancryptid22
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(heehee funnie post with many rebloggo. anyway thanks for the tag @mustard-ketchh-tomatosauce. tags: @i-eat-grease @a-had-matter [you love these things] @goblinofthelaboratory @angst-is-love-angst-is-life)
Jaws the shark!!!!!
Lurking in the dark of the depths of sea, one day on a lark
Decides to get rowdy, get real violent
Takes a vay-cay up to Amity Island
Sunshine lotion fun in sun! ☀️☀️
Blood in the ocean, everybody run!
'Cause it's crazy how few fucks this shark gives
He'll eat naked ladies, he'll eat little kids!
Oh, no!
But the one thing keeping the community safe
Is a guy named Brody and his pal Richard Dreyfuss
Jaws don't know that a storm's gonna come
He just wants everyone to be his chum, get it, get it
The mayor don't care if the townsfolk die
He doesn't want to spoil the fourth of July
He's like, "Everyone cool it, and go for swim!"
But holy shit here comes that fin!
Jaws is here🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈
Here is Jaws🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈
(He is a shark without a cause)
He was in a movie you should watch it it's called Jaws :)
Jaws is here 🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈
Here is Jaws🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈
(He is a shark who fights the law)
He was in a movie that everyone saw
Long story short, the beach gets closed
The mayor's like, "Okay, yeah, this blows"
Suddenly Jaws has got a price on his head
But the wrong little shark baby ends up dead
It was Jaws' little brother, now he's pissed
The mayor just shot to the top of his list
He sneaks in his house in the middle of the night
And he eats that fucker in a single bite!
Golly!! 😲
Now the mayor's dead, so Brody's in charge
He knows the real killer is still at large
So he and the Dreyfuss make a decision
They're going on a mission!
They're gonna go fishing!
For J A W S!
A man named Quint lets them use his boat
On the condition that he be the one to cut Jaws' throat
'Cause he was a sailor back in World War II
And Jaws ate his entire crew, woah!
Jaws is here 🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈
Here is Jaws 🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈
(He is a shark without a cause)
He was in a movie, a movie called Jaws!
Jaws is here 🦈🦈🦈🦈
Here is Jaws🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈
(He is a shark who fights the law)
He was in a movie that everyone saw
They're out on the sea, they wait all night
Where could Jaws be? He's no where in sight 🤔
Dreyfuss decides to go down in a cage
And Jaws shows up in a full on rage
He tears up the cage like paper in a shredder
While Dreyfuss's makes his wetsuit wetter
He hides behind a rock like cowardly prick
And he doesn't come back until the end of the flick
Brody's like, "We're gonna need a bigger boat"
So they go home and get a bigger boat
The biggest boat that's ever sailed
Gonna kick Jaws' ass or I guess his tail, yeah his tail 😐
But, oh, my shit!😨
Jaws jumps out and Quint gets bit!
Right in half like a kit-kat bar!
Up in the sky there's a shooting star
That's Quint up in heaven, he's a star now
Brody's angry, he's all like, "Fuck it"
He takes a harpoon and welds it to a rocket
Jaws' last words are, "Woah, respect"
Then he explodes and it's a pretty good effect, yeah!
Jaws is dead :(
Long live Jaws 🫡🫡🫡🫡
(He was a shark without a cause)
He was in a movie, you should watch it, it's called Jaws
JAWS IS DEAD
LONG LIVE JAWS
(He was a shark who fought the law)
He was in a movie that everyone saw
(He was in a movie that everyone saw)
He was in a movie that everyone saw
Jaws is dead
Long live Jaws
(He was a shark without a cause)
He was in a movie, called Jaws
(Jaws is dead)
At the Academy Awards
(Long live Jaws)
He was robbed
(He was a shark without a cause)
Sharks exist in real life, woah! 😦 😱
(He was in a movie that everyone saw)
Jaws is dead :(
Long live jaws 🫡
@bemusedrodent @i-eat-rusty-nails @the-trash-eating-llama you know you want to >:)
Tasty.
we’re so close to 200,000 so here’s my cat
God I love him...(he's so gender and like me fr fr)
diversity wins! the text-to-speech voices are gay!
you know that spontaneous urge to make another tumble account to do a comedy/horror in-character account for a dollar tree that has some…unique features? just me?
(hypothetically, if i did do this, would anyone be interested in it? no? yeah, that’s what i thought.)
Oh my god it’s him. it’s Marius
i am no longer allowed to have free time
therapist: will wood with unfinished rendering isn’t real, he can’t hurt you
will wood with unfinished rendering:
Okay but imagine Jon of this universe talking casually on the underground and Colin jolts to attention.
"You!"
"Sorry??"
"YOU!!"
"Good lord-"
Jon having no ideas why he's being chased by a sleep deprived Scottish man.
IF ANYONE KNWS ANY FICS ABOUT THIS !!!
every time i see the tumblr ‘get a domain’ message i immediately think of a fear domain
’are you an early bird or a night owl’ bitch i am not the sunshine i am not the moon at night who else could i be when i can hardly see?
