sometimes the shit breaks you

john, 26, cat inspector, blunt technician 🇵🇸 come get yall love and affection

[segamascott]

[horse-is-a-horse-of-course]

Kevin still visits the grave.

[freegiftjones]

one time i was making potato soup and i needed broth for it but i was out of broth. but in my dog food cabinet there was a carton of chicken broth that i had bought for my dog. now the box did say HUMAN GRADE and the ingredients were just bog standard chicken broth. it did say something about joint health for dogs on there. but the ingredients were normal. i even compared the ingredients list to some normal person broth and they were the same. so i did put dog broth in that soup and it did taste completely normal. but i did use the dog broth.

[chicknparm]

[captain-price-returns]

[himynamesisnotemail]

[thememedaddy]

[visenyaism]

Marylanders don’t say hi hello how are you my name is they just try to kill you with their car. which is of course a great honor in their culture

[visenyaism]

In Northern Virginia the country of my birth people kill you with their car because you deserve it. sic semper tyrannis

[pjackk]

MY NEW WAY TO HAVW FUN🔥🔥

[3000s]

while you were busy jacking off & cumming hard. it rained outside beautifully

[bunniope]

what do you think i was jacking off to...?

[leolaroot]

You can only be a man or a woman, not both

[sentada]

lowkey i just killed all innocents

[plumbo-gummite]

notice how no one died

[oedipalrivalry]

being a team sports fan really is like oh what if you stanned the ship of theseus

[bowelflies]

the most powerful man in the world

[gunsandfireandshit]

Always reblog Pangzai, legend.

[cowboylikecahir]

our expedition of franklin is collapsing

[moviequotes3]

i met agent 47 in an elevator today and i asked him what mission he was on and he said he couldnt say its top secret and then winked at me covertly and said he will try to get a good ranking. and i think he will.

[phillip-bankss]

[captain-price-returns]

[whitmanic]

Whenever i get sad I just think about sour cream baby and get smiled again

[whatcoloristhatcat]

dilute black (blue) ticked tabby abyssinian

[luxiomahariel]

with low sour cream spotting