piss

IMMA MUNCH ON EDWARDS BALLS

[boxheadpaint]

unforgiving

[unimatrix-420]

[homoquartz]

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

[stan-leigh-bowery]

I just

[skelegun]

That’s not a home that’s a Halo Reach map

[doubleca5t]

Are we ignoring the family guy paintings?

[juliathefacesofevil]

I'm trying to

[grimeclown]

 “hi welcome to mcdonalds what can i get for you?”

“yeah can i get a deluxe quarter pounder with cheese?”

“absolutely, do you want the meal or just the sandwich?’

“uuuuuh hold on”

*fishes something out of my pocket*

“mikey what do i do?”

“get the fries. youll need the energy in the coming days”

*stuffs it back in my pocket*

“uhh yes please  the meal would be great”

[wingdingle]

this post legitimately changed the way i think about and consider getting meal deals

[ookamikuro]

Isn’t this the post that got the cease and desist from Michael Jackson’s estate?

[gay-jewish-bucky]

I looked it up

yeah it is, ifdsdhgk

[chilewithcarnage]

world heritage post

[totallynotagentphilcoulson]

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

What the f u c k happened in the spn fandom??? I was offline for ONE DAY FOR HEAVENS SAKE

lmao i know, it happened again.

the short version: it's been revealed that the cw (the network spn aired on) has literally never been profitable since its inception in 2006, and its parent companies cbs and the wb are looking to sell it.

bonus: it looks like this is happening now because they've lost SO much money and viewership after spn ended by alienating most of its fans, who have been boycotting the network since. this is extremely funny because destiel is wildly popular, and if they had only leaned in to its popularity and exploited it, maybe the could have actually made a profit.

instead, they killed dean and cas and placed all their bets on a reboot of walker texas ranger starring jared padalecki.

on the same day, misha posted a tweet which informed us that billie eillish is such a spn fan that she actually named her cat misha. this has endless comedic possibilities as well.

and of course, this is all happening and trending on the 1 year anniversary of the jan 6 coup attempt on the american capital, which lends a certain "destiel putin election" vibe to everything and makes it all funnier.

[ace-the-final-frontier]

[dimetrodone]

Imagine being Friend Bear and the embodiment of friendship in Care-a-Lot and some fuck named “Best” Friend Bear suddenly comes into town

[headspace-hotel]

i would turn into fucking Enemy Bear

[headspace-hotel]

Might fuck around and spread misinformation

[headspace-hotel]

PDF stands for penis dick file

[aru]

Tumblr Code.

[geekishchic]

If I ever see any of you in public, the code is “i fill my ass with orange juice”

that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything

I’m just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person

must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now!

Remember the answer is: ”17 cocks”

always reblog tumblr identification

[amlsh-deactivated20181211]

this post makes me want to gouge my eyes out

[sads]

im laughins so hard who changed it

[ace-beef]

[pisshandkerchief-deactivated202]

WHO TF EDITED THE SHOELACE POST

[pisshandkerchief-deactivated202]

No seriously the edit function has been gone for years who did this

[second-order-simulacra]

[roscolux]

they didn't even ban mpreg

[dogdayafternoon1975]

[rainbow-femme]

I’m not bitter

[echiosbrain]

I am bitter

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

Literally every movie adaptation ever: Henry Jeckyll is just a poor victim of his evil side Mr Hyde!

The Actual Book: Henry Jeckyll is a weird fuck who turned himself into a monster man because he wanted to indulge in doing horrible things without fear of getting caught

[ripperblackstaff]

Add the phantom of the Opera !

[rumpykamon]

If you allow me-

[filthburger]

[mother-of-imps]

Id trade anything for the amulet

[evilwizard]

you will.

[mother-of-imps]

Ive lost everything

[evilwizard]

[fall-out-girlboy]

Here's a cookie I hope you feel better.

[evilwizard]

oh i don’t think so

[mikkeneko]

[kalichnikov]

YOU’RE TOO LATE SPIDERMAN! YOU’LL NEVER GET YOUR TURKEY DEFROSTED IN TIME! THANKSGIVING IS DONE FOR! NYEHEHEHEHE

[anem0nesiac-deactivated20231104]

BUT YOU’RE THE ONE GETTING PUT ON ICE, GOBBY!

[modernhaterboy]

Why is it that when you start eating eggs you also have to suffer a race against time before your brain decides to make eating eggs unbearable

[nongunktional]

literally rip to you i have unlimited egg capacity there is no maximum number of eggs that fits in my body it’s just arbitrarily high to the point where if all the chickens on the planet were laying eggs directly into my mouth i’d just be chugging the fuckers down shit you could terraform mars and transform every square inch of it into a chicken ranch and add that to the total egg input and nothing would change for me. there is no such thing as too much egg.

[oceansofbliss]

Hey bro what the fuck

[toastyglow]

[unclefather]

peanut m&m’s are erotic

[cada-dreamer-127-deactivated202]

fun fact: there was an urban legend in the 1970s that said the green m&m was an aphrodisiac

[unclefather]

you think it was an urban legend? come and sit down with me right here

[pitbolshevik]

this shit sucks i wish i was a werewolf

[femmeharlequin-deactivated20240]

Dracula’s rebellious teenage daughter after he said no to a $1000 prom dress

[radiation]

Huge pet peeve in video games is when you can’t hold your breath underwater for very long or it takes a good while to regain your breath above water. Unrealistic. Like my condolences to the devs for your lack of breath support but that just could not be me…

[fortidogi]

are you a frog or perhaps a turtle

[radiation]

i am a Saxophone player

[cowboy]

I fucking hate my friends all they do is pull out the goddamn duolingo app . My friend was literally tripping on acid the other day and was like bro I need to do my duolingo today help me do it 😭