your friendly neighbourhood radfem

uk-based lesbian. early 20s. sick of your gender bullshit.

[inkskinned]

hey if this storm ends up being as it looks, you need to take it seriously, particularly if you're in a southern state and not used to storms like this. i'm not a professional but my new england experience for losing power/etc is:

fill your bathtub with water before the power goes out. in an emergency where the pipes freeze, you'll have semi-clean water. you can use this water for your pets, to wash dishes, flush your toilet, and other small important stuff. if you have no bathtub, fill as large a bin/pot/etc as you can find.

air is the best insulator. if you can tape plastic over your windows and major drafts, it will genuinely help. (they have kits for it, but i've used trash bags and duct tape). blankets/tarps/etc also work. leave space between the covering and the window - the layer of air protects you. shove towels under your doors.

in a true emergency, you can ball up newspapers and shove them into your coats/pants/etc between your base layer and your coat. it won't be comfortable but it does insulate a little better.

have an emergency plan for your pets, particularly animals like reptiles that need constant heat to survive.

the weight of the snow and ice will be an issue. plan accordingly.

black ice is a bitch. if it looks "wet", assume it is frozen. actually just assume everything is frozen for a little while.

if you do not have a generator or other emergency power source, DO NOT bring outside-use heat sources (like propane stoves) inside. you can gas yourself and die.

instead, if you truly have no heat source: focus on insulating a small amount of space in your house - a few rooms - and bring as many bodies and supplies in there as possible. do not break insulation if you can avoid it. you are a ~100-degree object. make your safe space into a blanket fort. you may go stircrazy but it is better than freezing.

if you have a fireplace you never use, check the flue and the chimney before the storm holy shit. i am not kidding about this. do not just start a fire willy nilly. you will burn your house down.

relatedly, if you start a fire and notice smoke is billowing back into the house: stop the fire immediately. your flue is closed or your chimney is backed up. you will burn your house down.

keep the fridge closed as long as possible; it lets the air out. but honestly like, my family has used snow as a fridge a lot. stuff that needs to stay cool will be less of an issue than things that need to get warm. plan accordingly.

most canned things can be eaten cold, but check the label. if you have a little sterno fire, it can go a long way.

if you develop a headache and feel weirdly sleepy, you may be forced to open a window. you might have carbon monoxide poisoning.

every year people die while shoveling snow. it is actually not very safe as a chore tbh. you need to go slow and take lots of breaks. you should also 100% wait until the snow has actually passed, only because when it starts shifting and undoes all your work, it will piss you the hell off.

have drinking water somewhere easily accessible. a lot more of it than you think completely necessary tbh.

fill your gas tank. it will help prevent your lines from freezing.

if you have a battery-powered light that's not very strong, put it under a water jug, it'll throw more light. idk why it works but it works.

just because you know how to drive in the snow doesn't mean other people know how to drive in the snow. better to just not.

your device probably has a "low power mode". probably best to just keep it on asap rather than be taken by surprise tbh. the battery will last longer.

great news to fanfiction writers: it really is better if y'all take one bed and huddle together for warmth. do not strip out of your clothes, though, i have no idea who the hell decided that was the smart thing to do. you want to keep at least a layer of leggings and a tight shirt on. the goal is to find the fine line between "warm" and "sweating" - you want to stay as dry as possible for as long as possible.

your hair, eyelashes, and nosehairs can freeze. just from personal experience: try not to rub or touch them, it can snap your hair off and then you'll be very sad.

hypothermia is a lot faster and more evil than most people expect. watch for shivering, confusion, and unexplained exhaustion. if someone stops shivering, that is not always a good sign. if you think you/someone you love has hypothermia, warm them up slowly. often this is through rubbing/friction (or a heat source if available). keep them awake and try to feed them something.

same for frostbite: don't just shove your hands into a fire. warm any affected area slowly. fair warning, as the blood recirculates, it will hurt :(

those blue rubber examination gloves under other gloves can help even very-cold hands stay warm.

liquor is not a good idea to drink right now, sorry beloved. but vodka/rubbing alcohol does work as an excellent de-icer if you need something small done quickly (like a lock/door handle). it's just, like, expensive in comparison to other things lol

"i don't eat that much anyway i'll be fine" that's the devil talking. you will not be. you will also probably be burning way more calories than normal. let the soft animal of your body eat a bunch of delicious snacks.

good luck i love you stay warm out there everyone

[paleo-violet]

Adding a few things for mammalian pets:

MAKE SURE YOU INCLUDE THEM when you calculate how much water you wanna store

If you go out to drive, bang on the hood and check beneath the car in case stray or lost cats are hiding under there for warmth

Supervise your dogs when you take them outside, and check their paws for cracks and bleeding after. Reduce the amount of time spent outside all at once -- it's easy for short-furred dogs or dogs without double coats to get hypothermia. Huskies, of course, are quite literally a different breed (though of course you should make sure they're safe as well)

Please please please be careful about using space heaters. Like with small children, you don't want them to burn themselves.

When walking your dog, stay well away from frozen ponds. Be extra careful to avoid icy sidewalks.

If you have a shed, make sure you check that strays didn't seek shelter and get trapped inside without food and water. And definitely check out ways to make easy, safe winter shelters for ferals!

[bedbody]

for the love of god i’m begging a band of UK lesbians to come rescue me from the male centered trans ideology brainrotted theyfab queer spaces of California, USA, like here’s a rundown of my 2025:

me at the lesbian club when i talked with a woman 10 years older than me for 15 minutes about female oppression and she said “yes we luv radical feminism! as long as it includes transwomen, TWAW! we hate terfs!” and i had to be like “well yes of course!”

me in the bisexual theyfab friend group who were all about boundaries and acceptance, when i made a disgusted joke after they showed me a photo of a real penis and they said “but you don’t know who the penis is attached to! what if you fall in love with a trans woman?” and i had to lie and say “oh yeah i guess it depends on the person!”

me when that same friend group told me i’m probably nonbinary and gave me a book written by a TIM because i agreed with them about how gender roles are harmful constructs made to subjugate women, then also told me if i’m attracted to females who don’t identify as women i should question my lesbian identity, and then raged out about me “hating sex workers” because i posted andrea dworkin quotes which quite literally described the opposite of hating sex workers:

me at the lesbian holiday party when i had chemistry with a masculine woman 20 years older than me and she told me she’s a closeted trans man and i said i’m a lesbian who likes mascs and she said “well maybe you’re pansexual”

me when every single woman ive met this year will agree with me about everything i say about our shared experiences and then completely contradict it with the cognitive dissonance that trans ideology and libfem sex positivity requires

[rabidrascal-deactivated20260310]

For the first time, I'm sure of own beliefs. It's hard to explain to someone who hasn't lived and breathed trans ideology but for me, believing it all required so much mental effort and energy. It was hard!

You know how EXHILARATING it is to be able to admit that? I told myself "that's just how it is, of course it's complicated, I just have to try harder - the human experience of Gender and Sexuality is so vast and complex and unknowable, of course I can't easily explain it. There aren't easy, rational explanations. It's a mystery, but at least we are trying to solve it."

But I was wrong!

The reason it was hard is because it, all of it, doesn't describe reality in any sense but I'm asked to convince myself it does. And convincing myself was a constant, neverending task. To somehow take the convoluted, incoherent, baseless, nonsensical, flimsy belief system and make my logical brain accept it as indisputable fact... That wasn't ever easy.

And you know what? The second I allowed myself a single moment of doubt the whole house of cards collapsed instantly. And if your years held ideology collapses from a single question it was never something you genuinely believed in.

Being trans required of me absolute, unquestioning devotion to it's theory and practice. And that's not something any other legitimate political, intellectual or social movement fucking asks of you. It took me a long time to realize it.

[azuremist]

I DESPERATELY needed someone to tell me this as I grew up in leftist online spaces. So now I am going to tell YOU:

If you

Check what you sent over and over to make sure you didn’t say a slur instead of “hello how are you”

Fear that someone will find you thinking not-leftist-enough thoughts and will call you out and ruin you

Feel you have to make your intentions clear and over-explain your actions

Find yourself consistently resisting the urge to engage in reassurance-seeking WRT being a good enough ally to marginalized people

Stay up late endlessly debating political ethics in your head

Have a set of actions that you take after discovering you made a morally wrong decision so that you can atone, which you rely on for reassurance that you are not a bad person

Would rather not make a decision at all than make a decision that is the lesser of two evils, but is not morally pure

then I am gently, but firmly, requesting that you look into moral scrupulosity OCD.

[dreamerwriternstargazer]

[merry-mouse]

[femconstellation]

Do y’all want to make any guesses on how the comments look?

Thankfully there’s some brave lesbians in the comments defending their sexuality but omfg

[scifi0lver]

[thegenderdetective]

"Pregnant people" is the "all lives matter" of abortion politics

[cadaverer]

can we stop doing this please

[icantchooze]

Literally identical to what any given male does to females even down to the format.

Literally this is just sexism hiding behind gender ideology.

[quinntheestallion]

As feminists, we need to invent a new word to reflect the very specific form of pollical and advocational terrorism women are experiencing at the hands of Trans Identified Males. The fact that there is no public service or resource women can create for themselves without it being undermined and destroyed by males with identities is a distinct form of socio-political oppression only being inflicted on those born female. Notice males do not face this issue with trans men, because of their social and political dominance. The burden is on trans men to fit into male spaces without becoming outed/ a victim. Trans men who don't pass, self exclude from male spaces due to their own fear of dominant males and the consequences of transgressing/not conforming. Meanwhile, there is no burden on TIMs- they are free to remake female spaces to accommodate them because those born female lack the social and political resources to protect their spaces. Oppression is sex based.

[androc1dal]

okay… the fact that the tweeter gave it a WHOLE WEEK for it to turn into a trans rights issue is so optimistic. i wish i had this much faith in TRAs to wait a whole WEEK before complaining that someone didn’t affirm their woman feelings

[hexagon-club]

this was literally the plot of a Bojack Horseman episode

[midnightssea]

if it’s “against your religious beliefs” to shake hands with a woman then you should probably be living in a cloistered community of like-minded woman-haters in some remote landscape somewhere instead of pursuing a career in public life where you have to work with women. this is the nicest way I could have possibly phrased this btw.

[niiwa-angel]

You should also avoid

Hospitals

Airplanes

Going out to eat in redtaurants

Pursing post secondary education

The grocery store

Moving to Western countries at all tbh

[liberalsarecool]

People who never go to a bathroom with a trans person are most upset.

People who share bathrooms don't five a fcuk.

[truthscicle]

Trans people wish they were black so bad LMAO 😭 people are born black, just like how trans women are born men. Can’t change that buddy, nice try tho

[beware-the-water]

“…And presumably white supremacists feel uncomfortable in the presence of black people. But these examples show how silly it is to characterise women's desire to exclude men from their private spaces as bigotry. Women do not run the world, and their changing rooms are not where they plot to keep men down. Nor is their desire to undress away from the male gaze caused by anti-male prejudice.

A comparison is often made with white American women who wanted to keep their spaces white-only in the Jim Crow-era South. But those women were not uncomfortable with admitting black women in the way that women are uncomfortable with admitting men; rather, they were prejudiced against black people in the way white people of both sexes were in that place and time. In any analogy between oppression based on sex and race, women should be compared with black people, not white people. Males entering women's spaces are nothing like black people claiming their place in society; they are like white people denying black people spaces where they can shelter from the minority of white people who wish to do them harm.”

- Trans Helen Joyce

[uncertainwaters]

i used to think peaking was this horrible thing people did out of spite and venom. i did not realize how utterly devastating it actually is to realise that you were wrong. that you were on the wrong side of history. that you in all your certainty that you were standing up for what's right, were doing harm. that you believed things about other people that were wrong and hurt them on the basis of that misunderstanding. that your friends, your well meaning friends that you still love dearly and know to be kind and idealistic and tender hearted people, are wrong too. that your community that you loved and still love in some ways hurt people and protected the perpetrators and burned the evidence.

it is not some spiteful act. it is grief like i cannot describe. it is horror. it is despair. it is so awful. i am not having fun. i am not enjoying this. i didn't want this. i wanted so badly to find a way to disprove what my own eyes were seeing. i still wish i could find a way.

[annie-ave]

I relate to this so hard, especially the part about mourning not being on the right side of history and worrying about people who are genuinely kind but so blind to this.

I remember crying late at night in my dorm room at undergrad in bed next to my nb roommate bc I was unable to reconcile what I’d been told about the scientific backing of gender identity, transitioning minors, and sex versus the studies that had actually been done on the subject.

It was horrible. Like walking around in a nightmare. As someone with OCD I get compulsive about these kind of things. I researched endlessly. It felt like rending my soul in two. I tried to push it down for years.

[exdivine]

Ethel Cain's "apology" is soo 4chan incel white guy coded. Saying "I said racist things because I was young in right-wing spaces and wanted to shock ppl" is a cop-out, like okayyy and? That's not a normal experience.

[gloomyrelaxing]

White males throwing tantrums cause they admitted to having a Nazi phase when they were a child and they aren’t getting the sympathetic reaction they were expecting to receive 💀 the incel to troon pipeline is so real.

[prodigalwitch]

mark my words something like this will come out about hunter schafer and alex consani soon

[radicio0]

The response to the Ethel Cain situation is really bizarre.

I was surprised when the allegations were first posted and saw a bunch of white people on tiktok outright dismiss the racism or state they didn’t care. Hayden’s target demographic appears to be the liberal left leaning types who would be otherwise disgusted by the use of racial slurs.

I follow a woman on tiktok who is exceptionally articulate on feminism and Black feminism. She made a video expressing dismay about the incest tee due to a personal history of such abuse. The majority of the comments were in Hayden’s favour, telling her that Ethel Cain is a character/piece of art so it’s okay, or that she ‘was a victim of incestuous abuse, not incest,’ so the sentiment written on Hayden’s tee shouldn’t bother her.

I will say that following Hayden’s terrible statement, I’m seeing less of these videos/comments. (What on earth does having a hypothetical struggle with the concept of incest mean?)

Hayden’s fans appear to think that intersectionality is when we don’t hold white people responsible for racism if they are part of another minority social identity. (In this case, being transgender). That’s why I suspect the usual progressive types suddenly don’t care.

[pineapplecake555]

The populist left has dropped all pretense of caring about POC, Jews, women, LGB, the disabled, or indigenous people. Even AFAB trans and nonbinary have been abandoned.

Except when the marginalized can be weaponized against the right, all the populist left cares about is bettering their own financial position and normalizing porn addiction.

Trans women are the only people that matter now and all other bigotry is either irrelevant or funny again.

[prettygirlshategoyim]

[paleo-violet]

Yep. I have nothing against men who prefer "feminine" clothes, but that's a different sort of behavior. The one that raises red flags is based on misogyny and sexual gratification.

[clytemnestradidnothingwrong]

I'm ok with the concept of men who wear women's clothes in theory, but in practice, way too many men do it for sexual reasons, so unfortunately, I'm weary of it now.

[prodigalwitch]

I abhor the concept of 'women's clothes' in general, given that certain items, usually more restrictive and/or revealing, are considered to be only for the Other. Ideally, clothes are just clothes, imo.

But- it's precisely because of the concept of 'clothes for the Other' that this behaviour occurs. It's only because of the consistent othering of women that males can fetishize us in this way.

Males constructed the idea of woman as Fuckable Other. Everything relating to femininity is MEANT to fetishize women as Fuckable Other- it is meant to duhamize women and make women into an object for fucking. ALL males fetishize women as Fuckable Other in some way.

The difference between male crossdressers and other males is that crossdressers are attempting to 'put on' the Fuckable Other. For male crossdressers, wearing 'women's' clothing is inherently sexual, because women are inherently sexual objects-- not even human. This is exactly why so many crossdressers enact violence (especially sexualized violence) against women and girls.