Grandpa Bird Zone

Stuff happens here

[grandpa-bird-zone]

We are SO eating good next year.

[grandpa-bird-zone]

CALL OUT TO ALL OBSCURE KAIJU MEDIA NERDS

Does anyone have any footage of Ghost SpaceGodzilla and Super Special SpaceGodzilla High Grade Type 2 from the 1997-98 series Godzilla Island?

[greek-orthodox-priest]

went to miami to recover father sotirios. and made some new friends.

these animals... they are wise. I recruited them to avenge my dear brother. I was then escorted out of the sea world.

[a-book-of-creatures]

Better than the 1596 Marseille dolphin exorcism I suppose.

[maxkowski]

[a-book-of-creatures]

In 1596 dolphins were infesting the port of Marseille. Back in those days, y’see, dolphins didn’t have the cuddly image they enjoy today. They were pests and were causing damage.

So the cardinal of Avignon sent the bishop of Cavaillon to do something about them. In front of a huge crowd, the bishop sprinkled some holy water into the waters of the port and told the dolphins to begone. Whereupon the dolphins indeed turned tail in terror and fled, and were never seen again.

Still not as dramatic as Saint Bernard excommunicating the flies though.

[melononthefloor]

What happened to the flies?

[a-book-of-creatures]

Saint Bernard of Clairvaux built a monastery in 1124, but it was plagued by flies. So the good saint promptly excommunicated them. By the next day the flied had died in such quantities that they had to be shoveled out.

Still not as nutty as the Basel rooster trial though.

[fatefulfindings]

*everyone in unison* um what rooster trial?

[a-book-of-creatures]

In 1474, a rooster in Basel did the heinous and unspeakable act of laying an egg. As everyone knows, an egg laid by a rooster will hatch into a basilisk (or cockatrice).

So to avoid the creation of a cockatrice (or basilisk), the rooster was tried, found guilty, and burned at the stake along with its egg. A huge crowd was present.

The “rooster” in this case was likely a hen that had developed male characteristics (it happens).

Still not as properly legal as the Savigny pig trial though.

[bonnettbee]

Ok, clearly you want an excuse to talk about the pig thing, and I now DESPERATELY want to hear about the pig thing, so PLEASE tell us about the Pig Thing.

[a-book-of-creatures]

In 1457 a sow killed Jehan Martin, a five-year-old boy in Savigny. For that crime she was put on trial and judged guilty, and sentenced to be hanged from a tree.

Her piglets, however, were judged to have been innocent of the murder, and so were returned to the owner, with the caveat that he had to surrender them to the law if they were later found to have eaten any of the boy.

Not to be confused with a whole bunch of other, similar porcine trials.

I won’t mention the 1454 excommunication of eels in Lake Geneva then.

[hemipelagicdredger]

OK what did the eels do, and more pressingly why were they in communion with the church in the first place

[a-book-of-creatures]

Animals are expected to be part of the Church by default, that’s why they take excommunication so badly.

Felix Hemmerlin’s treatise on exorcism, cited by e.g. Wagner’s Historia Naturalis Helvetiae (1680), informs us that around 1221-1229, eels once infested Lake Geneva in huge numbers. So Saint William, bishop of Lausanne, excommunicated them and banned them from the lake, forcing them to live in only one part of it.

Plot twist: as far as we know, Saint William was never bishop of Lausanne.

[redheadedhypocrite]

There’s no way you have historical Christianity nonsense more silly than this to share

[a-book-of-creatures]

I’ve been trying to stay on brand and talk about animals only, but sure, few intersections of Christianity and the legal system get sillier than…

… the Cadaver Synod.

Pope Formosus (“Good-looking”) was pope from 891 to 896, and apparently accumulated a few enemies. After his successor Boniface VI enjoyed all of a 15-day papacy, the next pope elected was Stephen VI.

And he hated Formosus.

How much? He had the corpse of Formosus exhumed, dressed up in papal vestments, and put on trial for his failings as a pope.

End result? Formosus was found guilty of papal fail. The corpse was stripped of its clothes, three fingers on its right hand were severed (no blessings for u), and it was tied to weights and dumped in the Tiber.

Needless to say Stephen VI came to a sticky end. An angry mob deposed him, he was strangled in prison, and Formosus’s corpse was fished up and reburied with honors. And the later popes passed edicts ensuring this kind of silliness would not happen again.

Tune in next time when I tell you about how a lawyer defended a city’s entire rat population.

[strawberriandromeda]

Please, the rats, give us the rats, i beg....

[a-book-of-creatures]

The story of the rats of Autun is also the story of Barthelémy de Chasseneuz (or Chassenée, etc.), a highly original and highly talented defense lawyer. That’s him here.

When the town of Autun was infested by rats in the early 1500s, they were accused of eating the province’s barley crop and were duly summoned to be judged in an ecclesiastical court of law. Chasseneuz was the defense attorney.

How do you defend an entire swarm of rats? You don’t, is the answer. You delay. Chasseneuz’s original defense was “my clients live all over the place, one summons won’t be enough”. So he got a court summons to be posted in all the infested parishes.

When the rats didn’t show up after the elapsed time delay, Chasseneuz proceeded to explain at length why. The rats didn’t come to court, he said, because of their enemies the cats, which are everywhere and always vigilant and hungry. “You cannot expect my clients to undertake a journey which would put them in mortal danger”, he argued in complete seriousness. “Thus they have the legal right to turn down a summons that endangers them”.

As far as we know, the rats never did appear in court, and remained unprosecuted.

Chasseneuz went on to have a distinguished career as a lawyer and was allegedly killed by a poisoned bouquet of flowers.

[meme-theft]

[65-percent-puns]

PLEASE TURN YOUR SOUND ON

[kinkshaming-butler]

MOTHER LET ME FIGHT

[anachronic-cobra]

I’ve never seen the long version of this video before

[mothmanismyuncle]

mother i wish to throw hands. mother. moTHER—

[xxtc-96xx]

From what I remember the black beard means he don’t wanna fight, he wanna do the other f word XD

“Mother I am horny!!”

[funnytwittertweets]

[theassbuttindisguise]

[thekaijudude]

Legend and Dark Faust cameo in Gridman Universe

Apparently Legend and Dark Faust showed up in the latest Gridman installment?

This came from news sources based in this:

Can anyone confirm this

No surprise Legend's here since his whole thing is being able to freely travel between universes and time

Since Dark Faust showed up, im assuming this takes place before Nexus, the entire Gridman saga mightve taken place potentially tens of thousands of years in the Multiverse's past (since it has been about 10 000 years since Mebius iirc)

And the entire Gridman saga mightve also potentially taken place in the 2004 Nexus' universe (assuming Dark Zagi didn't rip into another universe prior)

Especially since TsuPro has alr made suits, won't be surprised if Gridman characters would join the Ultra League in UGF4

But that also means I gotta watch the entire saga from scratch rip

[grandpa-bird-zone]

It's just a stage show, my guy.

No offense but I think you read too much into this stuff sometimes

[bogleech]

man I wish the original movie was more like this disney cruise line stage musical, who knew fucking Woody Toy Story actually had the biggest banger of a threatening villain-esque disney song?!

[bogleech]

Musical Woody shrinks that wretched boy with his haunted doll witchcraft and we never see him undo it

[larvalhex]

[dagashi-deactivated20160725]

ready to see some titties

[dissonant-aria]

Actual photo of my gaming rig

[demonius-darkblade]

the most thrilling way to surf the net is knowing at any moment your heavy-ass crt might slip from its flimsy safety belt and obliterate your dick

[djcrumrine]

My new film, Kunpengopterus

Kunpengopterus antipollicatus was a middle to late Jurassic pterosaur from the Tiaojishan Formation in China. K. antipollicatus had an opposable digit that would have made the pterosaur adept at grabbing tree branches and possibly other little tasty things.

[milk5-deactivated20260704]

[soulsearcher33]

[pintofpine]

[luzialowe]

literally every time I see this on my dash it fills me with Lovecraftian, cosmic dread

[gunstreetgrl]

this is the most horrifying thing i’ve seen in a long time

[grandpa-bird-zone]

Weird looking biscuit for weird looking dogs

[grandpa-bird-zone]

Lost in isolation at the midnight hour, I find myself here once more, as if called by powers beyond me. A question sears into my consciousness, powerful and burning at the front of my mind, unable to let me rest until the answer is laid before me.

Do eels like pineapple on pizza?

[grandpa-bird-zone]

Gary the Turtle is here to help you have a happy day. Give him your best smile!

[ultramanultimo]

Out of Z

[grandpa-bird-zone]

This is Flappo, and he is about to embark on a great and perilous journey. Before he leaves, he had visited you to bless you with good fortunes and success in your dreams, but only if you post “"God speed, Flappo” in the tags.

[luckydreaming]

Are fedoras really that bad?

YES YES THEY ARE

[onceuponakhaleesi]

voidethered:

ask-omnipony:

I don’t really believe this mumbo jumbo

I mean it’s a goddamn hat.

Right..?

The white rose, it symbolizes the unique beauty of all the women who wish not to be with a nice guy such as myse-

I wonder if this works with other kinds of hat…

Nothing ventured, nothing gained…

WHEEEN THE MOON HITS YOUR EYE LIKE A BIG PIZZA PIE THAT’S AMORREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Men of Tumblr are my favorite kind of people…

[jamesbleach]

wait, does that mean?

oh boy…….

[usedtobehmc]

Luckily, this nonsense doesn’t work on girls.

Observe…

[rootbeergoddess-deactivated2017]

IT’S GOTTEN BETTER!

[coffeeandcursewords]

This post is immaculate

[mobians-and-chaos-blog]

It can’t be true.

And it can’t possibly work on motorcycle helmets.

I must test it.

Nothing happening so far…

[strampunch]

HOLY SHIT IT WORKS

[pokemon-chick-1personalblog-blog]

What in the world?

Oh why not? This should be interesting.

Here we go!

Were all mad here in Underland!

What the hell! Never Again!

… Actually …

One more time.

[combthecombel]

Alright, I gotta try this!

Can’t be that bad!

….

…oh my god…

[verityglasses]

ask-gmodsfmrocks:

LOL

This just gets better and better

[fairytail-angel]

This is one of my favourite things to look at

[strampunch]

holy shit this stuff is back

[livia-jones]

The Gravity Falls one though

[nightowlhowell]

i wonder if it works for flower crowns?

here goes nothin-

w HAT THE

DID I JUST-

WHAT THE FUCK

[artfulhobbes]

Okay Clearly something is up.

Hmm… I wonder

I’m sure nothing could possibly…

HOLY SHIT

[clolymoly-deactivated20190507]

IT GOT BETTER

[nukewolf]

I HAVE BEEN SEARCHING SO LONG FOR THIS POST OH MY GOD!!!

[cm8x-insanity]

I wonder what happens when you wear 8 of these at once…

[roses-in-fire]

Never not reblog

[ryrobsessed]

IT’S ON MY DASH. ACTUALLY ON MY DASH.

[cate-geo]

Oh my God, there are so many new ones

[dvonmc]

Friggin, yis

[wildishmazz]

Always reblog.

[the-last-teabender]

IT HAS EVOLVED

[evilblackcat13]

The legend marches on…

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

BEWARE THE MAGIC OF HATS

[bittythemagpiedragon-blog]

JDNXHSBSBF

[hotshotriot]

I T ‘ S  B A C K 

[99-cent-arizona-tea]

a classic meme from when the world was less of a tire fire

[teeble-spoon]

ITS ON MY BLOG YESSSS

[fandombandomrandom42]

THIS IS WONDERFUL.

[i-srsly-need-to-stop-deactivate]

time to bring back outdated memes…

what could possibly go wrong?

eww, it smells like fuckboi

welp, down this rabbit hole we go…

nothing’s happeni-

WTF-

[ofcosmicflux-deactivated2019013]

Oh boy, this meme

I wonder if this would work with a wolf hat.

May as well try it.

Please don’t be awful, please don’t be awful, please don’t b-

get wet 4 furry

[saucy-majora-deactivated2021062]

This is obviously fake

Look, I’ll prove it

Y’all are just acting

Watch and learn

WTFFFFFF

[knowledgemimic]

Should…… should I…….

[breathingcolorsblog]

DO IT!

[knowledgemimic]

Whelp guess I gotta put on the hat now

Can’t be that bad, I mean what’s the worst a squid hat can do to m-

I̖̝̪̤̠̋͞ ̛̹̱̮̳̭̓̂͑ͫ͐̎ͯ͗͝͡H͇̠͊́̚A̛̓̓҉͙̠V͍̌̏͂ͣͨͭͧ̉́E̸͙̭̣͓̓ͨͥ̿ ̽͗͗ͮ͊ͬͩͥ̚҉̪̗̝̘̟́̕A̴̴̙̝̬̪̞͂ͤͩ̍W͚̣͆ͬỎ̫̝̟͖̝͇ͥ͛ͮ͋K̨̖͓͉̺̫͉̀͗ͪ̊͌̉E͚̲̩̪̘̠͋̈͞N͉͓͕̗̱͒̔ͨͤ͛̓̂ͧ

[kknamed-deactivated20180506]

Holy shit this is getting so freaking better than I thought XD

[racheldrawsthis]

CASH MONEY

[sunshine-in-a-petal-deactivated]

THE FLOWER CROWN

[softmushie]

I FINALLY FOUND IT I CANT BREATHE

[loveislattes]

AAAHHHH!!!! FINALLY!

[swaggness]

Ooh a meme

Welp…..might as well join the fun….

Oh god…….

NOPE!!!!

[tygermama]

i LOVE ALL YOU GUYS SO MUCH

[skybloodfox]

ITS BACK

[eponineinthebarricade]

YEEEEEEES IT’S ON MY DASH

[witchofmorena]

Finally found it

[arosnfkn]

i dont understand BUT THIS SHIT IS HILARIOUS

[deeptrashgarden-deactivated2025]

I FUCKING LOVE THIS

[stegosoreus]

GUESS WHAT I FOUND FUCKERS

[pu55yslay3r99]

Yes this is the third time I’ve reblogged this, what about it?

[krowkatzart]

EY IT BACK WITH MOREEEEEEE!!

[scottydo369-blog]

The Vietnam one is scary realistic. All of these are pure gold.

[thekaijudude]

Bruh I literally can't tell the difference here, can someone enlighten me?

[grandpa-bird-zone]

The eyes are smaller and more hexagon-shaped.

[dwgif]

“His first day was on location with Kylie Minogue, but all eyes, even Kylie’s, were on Bernard. He’d turned up with a suitcase full of props, just in case, including a rubber chicken. And what an actor. Oh, really though, what a wonderful actor. We once took him to the TV Choice Awards and sent him up on his own to collect the award, and the entire room stood up and cheered him. That’s a lovely memory. He’d phone up and say, ‘I’ve got an idea! What if I attack a Dalek with a paintball gun?!’ Okay, Bernard, in it went! He loved Gill with all his heart; he mentioned her in every conversation we ever had. A love story for the ages. I’m so lucky to have known him. Thanks for everything, my old soldier. A legend has left the world.”  — Russell T. Davies

BERNARD JOSEPH CRIBBINS, OBE (29th December 1928—28th July 2022)