The Iron Morrigan

Thirty crows in a human skin suit, disgustingly domestic house spouse. would like to be less warm all the time, tbh.

[peregrinethegryphon]

I made something cursed but hopefully helpful to artists.

[elodieunderglass]

you gotta be so careful

[cheaphalloweencostume]

the best piece of relationship advice i ever got was “a relationship isn’t 50/50, it’s 60/40 with each party excited to be the 60”. which to me means that you should be with someone who makes you want to do more, be more, open your heart even wider. why WOULDNT you like making life easier for your loved one(s)?

[power-chords]

This Dan Piraro comic always makes me cry.

[sufficientlylargen]

"Benedict Cumberbatch!" Cry out the tumblfolk, "Silliest dactylic Name you could hear!"

Critical oversight - Lost to obscurity, Engelbert Humperdinck Sheds one small tear.

[time-left-to-kill]

et tu brute?

[cbk1000]

So, I lurk in some writer subreddits, and a frequent topic of discussion is prose: what constitutes good prose, how do you write it, how do you improve it, etc. And yesterday I stumbled across one topic about the difference between good descriptive prose, and purple prose. OP asks people to share some of their favourite authors who they think write beautiful prose without tipping into purple. No problem; people are happy to oblige.

One person says that Steinbeck is one of their favourite authors for prose, and then they share an example of what they would consider purple prose. It is so violetly awful that I think the poster must have written it themselves as a kind of parody of purple prose. Other people assumed the same.

But as it turns out, they are quoting from a book written by a YouTuber whose channel ia dedicated to talking about writing (namely, their own writing, which is genius, but often not comprehensible to the drooling plebs).

Naturally, I read the free sample of their book in awe and horror, and I'd like to share some screenshots with you. If you also have trouble defining or understanding what purple prose is, it's this.

Yes, every single fucking page is written like this.

[cbk1000]

Reading some more of the preview for this book, and I realise this is by far not the biggest problem, but I'm begging this guy to just use 'shadow' instead of 'umbra'. I promise I will not accuse you of being a philistine.

[cbk1000]

'Noctilucent orbs'. Even fanfic written by a 14-year-old wouldn't dare.

The author is a man in his 30s, btw.

[kedreeva]

Any recent funny stories with your birds?

no they've all become quite serious and respectable and-

yeah I can't keep a straight face

[jetix]

2024-09-21

[birds-and-friends]

Flying is effortless, landing can be a little bit harder, Cornell Lab / DoC (northern royal albatross) (part 1)

[taylors-a-goblin]

There’s so much about this. The tumble itself is so irredeemably funny. The child stops asking for food and just stares in silence as the adult completely beefs it. The adult, absolutely ashamed, wandering off screen, refusing to make eye contact with the baby.

Perfect 10s all round.

[sefusneezed]

My discord server saw grainy footage of the darktide skitarii doing the omnissiah hand sign and argued over how to interpret it.

[love-and-hisses]

The kittens are biting butts, practicing their walking skills, and having the occasional zoomie. Something for everyone!

[storm-of-feathers]

a severe thunderstorm warning that doesnt follow through is worse than orgasm denial

[gamebird]

Like, I expected to get pounded and be wet. You're telling me neither of those happen?

[homunculus-argument]

If someone's explicitly tight-lipped about why they're not talking to someone again, I don't pry. Like "I'm not talking to those people anymore and I don't want to talk about it" ok none of my business. If someone goes into explicit detail about why they cut ties with people, yeah I have no reason to question that unless some new details come up that don't add up to the rest of your story.

But if someone's vague and dramatic about what happened, yeah I don't think I believe you. "All my friends betrayed me behind my back!" ok so did they drug you up and sell you for heroin or did like 3 of them have a separate side group chat to vent about how frustrating you are to deal with sometimes.

[cryptotheism]

I just felt someone Z-target me

[search-queery]

[clearly circle-strafing you] don't be ridiculous

[notahorseindisguise]

hmmmmm.... this shitpost from a user i dont know seems like a warm, safe place to lay an overshare egg 🥚

[teashoesandhair]

I'm in a little local cafe and the women behind the counter started griping to each other, "Oh Christ, Stephen's back again," "It's him, is it? I thought he'd stopped coming," "It's definitely him, look, it's bloody Stephen on a Thursday morning," "Do you want me to get rid of him or are you going to do it?" and so I was peering outside, trying to spot this nightmare customer, this pestilence of a person, this pox upon the cafe trade, and then one of the women from behind the counter ran outside, clapping two trays together loudly and yelling "GET OUT OF IT, STEPHEN!" and it turns out that Stephen is an absolutely gigantic fuck-off seagull who hangs around outside, menacing people for crumbs