The Wonder

To say this whole thing had taken over my life would be a colossal understatement. I'm here for lesbians and socialism.

[the-big-mood]

[wizardarchetypes]

it’s sooo funny when rude customers encounter employees who can deny them service for the first time.

i was working at a little cafe where I could deny service over bad behavior, harassment etc. & mask mandates had just ended a week before & already people were being weird about me still wearing mine—an N95, the kind shaped kinda like a duckbill.

so this man walked in, looked at me sooo scathingly, laughed at me, and said “damn. never known a woman to choose…practicality over looks.”

And I just said, “oh. you can go, you’re not getting a drink.” And he said, “what???”

I said, “sir, you just walked in at 6 am & called women impractical and me ugly in one sentence.”

And he was so astonished he didn’t even argue he just turned around and left 💀🙏🏻 it was like he suddenly became self aware

[carolinalaurel]

One summer I was running ferry rides across a lake so people could see the waterfalls without walking 6 miles when a guy snapped my bra strap as he was boarding the boat. So i immediately threw him off, he started yelling for my manager, my boss cheerfully informed him that, yeah, she’s the captain of the boat and she can kick off anyone she wants. He goes to storm off, looks expectantly at his girlfriend, and she just goes, “Well, I’M not walking six miles, Michael! I’ll meet you back at the car!” and sits right back down!!!!

The expression on his face when he was told that he couldn’t get on the boat, then immediately told that his girlfriend was ditching him? PRICELESS. he just blinked at her and then stormed off like a child. I gave her a free hat and was like maybe rethink this relationship…….

[hickeywiththegoodhair]

i once had this fucker come up to order a beer. while i pour it he shows me the wanky fucking chemical structure tattoo on his arm and he’s like “hey. you know what this is” i was like “nah sorry” (never cared abt chemistry in school, plus having to look at a some rando’s pretentious tattoo gives me the douche chills). he decides to respond with “heh. you must not read many books”

i immediately stop pouring his beer. i reply: “heh. you must not want this beer.” thirsty boy immediately starts groveling like a worm “please please no i do want the beer im sorry im sorry” believe me when i say it was one of the most pathetic things ive ever witnessed

[lezbadeez]

gotta love people immediately backpedaling when they realise that there are Consequences To Being Mean

[lastvalyrian]

I genuinely believe that part of why it has become so normalized to be openly callous and evil in politics is that customer service culture has trained affluent people that they can treat everyone they consider beneath them however they want and still be treated kindly.

[geniusbee]

these are getting weird

[dragon-in-a-fez]

top notch interaction I had with the ambulance crew after my accident a couple years back:

paramedic: hi, I'm Allan

me: you told me. and your colleague is Jim, and the man who found me is Peter. guess my short-term memory is okay

Allan: ..are you doing a cognitive function test on yourself

[dragon-in-a-fez]

Allan, two minutes later, putting a third blanket around me: okay, how's that feeling now

me: well my feet are still freezing but it's okay, I know you need to focus on getting my core temperature up first

Allan: how many times has this happened to you

[dragon-in-a-fez]

noteworthy that they literally had a mask on me hooked up to a tank pumping narcotics into my lungs through all this, and my body temperature was like 34°. I would have been doing well to just have both eyes pointed in the same direction

[supreme-leader-stoat]

"This is great. I'm going to get a good grade in post-accident cognition."

[musiicpix3l]

Yes yes i know love is love. But they are still killing CHILDREN. over this.

[marisatomay]

Happy Pride

[pterribledinosaurdrawings]

It's slow going but The Pile CAN be smallened!

[bigfoots-biggest-fan]

boyfriend says I have to post something festive for christmas, so just sharing that one time he got his English mixed up when seeing Santa in a shopping mall and he shouted at the top of his lungs "oh!!! whore whore whore!!!"

[bigfoots-biggest-fan]

this is a common occurrence, yesterday he asked me why a cushion said "fuck it till you make it" and a nearby store assistant nearly wound up on the floor she was laughing so hard

[bigfoots-biggest-fan]

Tonight's alltimer was "the alarm went off at work so everyone had to ejaculate"

[depsidase]

[npdclaraoswald]

A doll youtuber I watch has made a video about the history of Polly Pocket, and she's describing the plots of the dvd specials, one of which features an elderly woman named Ms. Throckmorton, and my reaction was

[asmeesh]

1$ flea market score. Tiny glass 1960s perfume bottles. I love them.

[shit-show-no-go]

Can you swap their heads ?

[asmeesh]

omg you can

[asmeesh]

Their meeting was foretold in the ancient texts

[theinvisiblespoon]

[ladyoftheharbour]

i've never been to the southern us i get all my information from tennessee williams plays

[ladyoftheharbour]

everyone in the south is a repressed homosexual

[jackkdaniels]

when i was a kid i decided that killing people was bad therefore war was bad therefore the military was evil. and adults would tell me it's more nuanced than that and i would understand when i grew up. well i'm a grown up now and idk i still think that killing people is bad and war is bad and the military is evil

[depsidase]

[succubusboyfriend]

so i’ve eliminated my phone from the “staying up all night” equation by getting an alarm clock and charging said phone in another room, but this resulted in a second, secret problem of staying up too late drawing because i still had my tablet. i don’t wanna move my tablet to another room as well because i like having a little bit of drawing time before bed so for about a week i was like….. oh i’ll just force myself off at the correct time eventually. one of these days that will happen.

but last night realized i'm never gonna just gain the willpower to curb my bad habits at random, that’s the entire reason i took the phone out of the room, so i just. set my tablet to turn completely greyscale from 12:30am to 8am to prevent me from staying up all night drawing. and guess who actually fucking went to bed the second his tablet turned grey.

[succubusboyfriend]

moral of the story and a lesson i think everyone can take from this is don’t expect yourself to just get over your bad habits through sheer force of will. it won’t fucking happen. instead make them as annoying as possible to continue. make them completely unsatisfying. sabotage your bad habits.

[ode-on-a-grecian-butt]

[official-lucifers-child]

so make it

Cunt

[andrikq]

I feel like this is something @theshitpostcalligrapher would write.

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

no no this one is a @carpe-aurore, I do chunkier scripts and she does a copperplate that would slay this

[carpe-aurore]

:3

[fidelcostco]

WAIT HOLD ON I cannot fucking believe when I was like four years old my parents were cajoling me to walk with the family and trying to get me to keep up even though I kept insisting that I was "tired" until they took me to a doctor and found out my LUNGS DIDN'T WORK. how insane that we live in a world where reasonably loving parents think their FOUR YEAR OLD is trying to be LAZY. like they were mortified to be clear. adults are just so trained to ignore children's complaints as untrustworthy, kids just need discipline, they can't possibly speak for themselves. what the fuuuuck.

[fidelcostco]

YOU ARE NOT IMMUNE BTW you should always be trying to take children seriously, especially very little ones but definitely all of them. the most disempowered class basically legally defined as property and most people are like "yeah that's good actually I hate when they Loiter lol they're stupid and loud and i actually think children should stop existing. restrict their personhood more actually"