#mystuff

Mid 20s || 🇲🇽 He/They Here’s the stuff I like (I do rb NSFW sometimes)

[human-pet-they]

[nobody-lavender]

some context that will definitely totally help

the dog is a robot, basically the in-universe equivalent of a smartphone

it also contains one-third of blue guy’s consciousness because he uploaded it to the dog

in this route the dog’s programming (=blue guy) gets reuploaded again to a human body

the body belonged to blue guy’s twin brother who willingly sacrificed himself for the project

[frikitty]

[viejospellejos]

What the duck?

[humanbeanisnotamused]

[Description: the video is captioned "Find the duck game", and we see several blindfolded women in hijabs groping around an enclosed ring while spectators look on, cheering and laughing . After a few seconds the camera pans so that you can see the duck, who is waddling around, casually yet resolutely resisting capture. Periodically the women collide with each other. They do not find the duck. End ID]

[elvashayam]

#it is a beautiful day in indonesia and you are a terrible duck

tags via @humanbeanisnotamused

[saga-anderson-deactivated202402]

this is how some of y’all look and it’s so transparent…..

[blackfilmmakers]

Everyone that makes this purely about heteronomativity in the notes, and not the very obvious racism here owes me $100 each

[venom-princess-deactivated20250]

[knighthearts]

happy pride month for it/its users, polyamorous people, xenogenders, non-transitioning trans people, and other "weird" identities. btw

[fuckrozanov]

goodmorning this is your assigned shane of the day

[apatheticfluorescence]

some hyper famous artists like Van Gogh transcend overratedness and become underrated because they're so normalized. Like I'll look at a van Gogh and I'm like wait this really is amazing you guys don't get it

[headspace-hotel]

Shakespeare is like this

[insufferablepirate]

Every time I see a Van Gogh that’s not one of his better known pieces it absolutely blows me away

Have you seen this shit my liege? smh unreal

[butch4prints]

A zine of questionable haircut advice :)

Download for free here

[null-deer]

Happy pride, y'all. I made a zine about being nonbinary

PDF on my ko-fi (My drawing tablet is broken and I would really appreciate some extra cash to go towards fixing it <3)

ALT text under the break

Panel 1 text, handwritten in white over a purple background: I AM NOT BINARY/ I am the inevitable expression of the infinite permutations of the human soul Panel 1 image: a fawn, a bunny, and 2 birds erupting from a white star with the agender symbol on it, the animals are collaged from a Bambi golden book and are in the Disney style.

Panel 2 text, handwritten in white over a black background: I am not the liminal space between/ 1 and 0/ I am everything outside of it Panel 2 image: a buck (collaged from a Bambi golden book) jumps from 1 to zero on a black background with a green flare behind it, it is edited to have small wings and wide eyes. It is surrounded by lots of small eyes.

Panel 3 text, handwritten in dark blue on a teal background: I wonder if I hadn’t been raised in a world/ of 1s/ and 0s/ What would I be like?/ I want to be neutral, NULL/ But in this binary world I am read as “default” Panel 3 image: a plump, yellow figure with the head of a doe (collaged from a Bambi golden book) edited to have wide eyes with red pupils and a concerned expression. The figure is slightly feminine-shaped and has a cartoon heart on its chest that bleeds. Beside it is a masculine-shaped yellow figure with a more angular body and the head of a fawn (collaged from a Bambi golden book) edited to have wide eyes with red pupils, fangs, horns, and a scared expression. It has top surgery scars and a cartoon heart that bleeds on its chest. The figures face away from each other and don’t have arms.

Panel 4 text, handwritten in white on a red background: Binary is a worm/ I want out of my brain Panel 4 image: A black anthropomorphic deer silhouette looking uncomfortable as a pair of tweezers pulls a pink and blue worm-shaped object out of its ear. The silhouette is fluffy and has top surgery scars.

Panel 5 text, handwritten in purple over a yellow background: This simplicity only complicates things/ I want to be/ free & freeform / without having to worry about falling into the box/ of/ 1 or 0 Panel 5 has no illustration

[philtstone]

other people have said this before but I just received a message along these lines so it bears repeating: it is NOT AT ALL WEIRD for readers to comment on every chapter of a WIP fic!! in fact it is HUGELY ENCOURAGING to the author! PLEASE do so! you are being the OPPOSITE of annoying!!

[podcastwizard]

you don’t realize how important lunch is until you’re wandering around thinking about how unloveable and untalented and uniquely cursed you are and then it’s 4pm and you finally eat lunch and you go Oh. oh right.

[bees-reads]

I’m obsessed with the idea of Shane figuring out he can use his big beautiful doe eyes to get anything he wants.

He just widens his eyes, makes them a bit glassy and Ilya folds like a damn chair.

After a while Ilya figures out what he’s doing and screws his eyes shut to avoid looking at Shane.

Ilya: no Shane no I know what you’re doing, put your eyes away. You will not use your wicked spells on me today

Shane: Ilya will you just look at me please

Ilya always ends up looking at Shane because he can’t resist him and Shane gets his way every single darn time.

[1410-1221-dec2008]

[evanactually]

Aika slayed it per usual

[themoonandmyman]

Most of the time, even when he’s getting pounded into the mattress, Shane likes his little kisses.

Sometimes though, he puts a plug in before Ilya gets home from the store and wears his slutty little shorts to signal that he wants Ilya to throw him face down on the nearest surface with no preamble whatsoever.

Ilya just walks in, sees the Slut Shorts and the red flush on Shane’s cheeks and his eyes go dark and hungry. They don’t even say a single word to each other until Ilya just stalks over, spins Shane around and presses him against the kitchen counter.

‘Desperate for it, Malysh?’ He drawls into Shane’s ear, and Shane can only nod, already lost in the anticipation.

He grinds his dick into Shane’s ass for a moment before promptly bending him over with zero warning and stripping his shorts and boxers, pulling his own down far enough just to pull out the plug in Shane’s ass and thrust right in.

They both groan loudly, the sound echoing off of all their criminally under-used appliances. Ilya wastes no time building a brutal pace, bruising Shane’s hips from where he’s pressed against the counter, holding his face down into the cold marble.

And fuck- it’s perfect. It’s just what Shane needs right now. To be used to make Ilya feel good. To feel his man, strong armed and solid chested all around him, big thick cock bullying his hole- and it’s even better when Ilya starts moaning like he’s been possessed. To hear how fucking good Shane feels, how tight he is, how he’s always ready and wet for him.

It takes an almost embarrassing four minutes for them both to cum, one after the other, until they’re panting, lazy and sweaty against the heat of each other’s bodies and Shane feels pleasantly used up.

(They do however sweetly kiss non stop for about 20 minutes after)

[bambicoded]

with how deeply physical their bond is, i don't think that hollanov ever bothered to develop a safeword. i do think, though, that they developed-- by accident!-- a physical system to tell each other how they are feeling. and it definitely bleeds into their life outside the bedroom, and it's definitely subconscious at this point, and it definitely makes it into the locker room and onto the ice by the time they're both in ottawa.

which means maybe the centaurs have picked up on the fact that hey, sometimes when shane wants ilya to stop doing something, he taps his arm twice. or if ilya wants shane to move one way, he taps him three times. or if he just wants his attention, its a squeeze. which is all relatively normal, and they probably think its cute that they have an unspoken language for communicating with one another.

and then maybe-- by accident!-- it starts taking root as a thing, and then mindlessly troy or wyatt or bood accidentally double pats shane's arm to get him to stop talking to ilya for a moment, and shane thinks for a moment, that was a weird coincidence, and moves on. but then it happens again, and then maybe luca squeezes his arm to get his attention and then bood taps him three times to get him to move aside so he can walk past and shane feels himself flush to the ears and catches ilya's eyes across the room and ilya definitely noticed that too. so now what? they can't full well ask them to stop without saying, hey, so this was a sex thing. but it'd be weird to let it continue... right?

[ilyapasta]

Assorted free-range headcanons about Hollanov at 45-55 years old:

Shane starts getting grays at 35, so by 45 he is a salt-and-pepper kING. It makes for a distinguished photograph on his memoir. He has a ghostwriter, obviously, how do you expect him to just sit and write all day? He writes the chapter about his and Ilya's rivalry though, only at the end of the chapter is he like "And we were married in the summer of 2021 with a honeymoon in Spain. He's the best person I know." after just a dry comparison of all their stats Pre-Centaurs.

One child. Boychild. Shane's genes and a Russian name. Conceived via surrogacy after Ilya retires first due to busted ass knee syndrome. Child enjoys hockey. Not great at it. Looooves playing the oboe in school band. Shane checks it out and AS IT TURNS OUT the oboe is a difficult, competitive instrument. They proceed with characteristic intensity, as if this was athletics. Son, you're gonna win at the oboe.

Ilya needs glasses. He just steals Shane's off his face and it's a whole ritual that ends in them kissing. Boychild is mortified every time they're trying to read a take-out menu.

Shane gets into hockey commentary/podcasting and is notoriously. Um. Not Nice. A lot of "What?? What did I say??" It's never personal though. Just about players' shitty game.

Ilya is Big. Chunky. He's glorious. Muscle that now has fat over it. Arms like tree trunks. Torso: round. 100% Naturalized Canadian Citizen Beef. Hair, everywhere. Shane must BITE to check it all out and make sure everything is in order.

Shane gets really into individual athletics- rock climbing, marathons before he also gets busted ass knee syndrome, biking, swimming, anything where it's like testing the limits of his body against himself. Ilya is like a "fifty push-ups every day keeps me in shape enough to fuck you right" kind of guy, but he joins in sometimes just to make Shane get furious with competition

New rookie/juniors player billeting every year once boychild goes to music conservatory so they build a whole separate wing for the youngsters so it doesn't interfere with empty-nest fucking

Once they hit 50 they do get up stupid early like old men do and have old man coffee shop time with David Hollander (professional boring old man) at their favorite diner. Shane really cherishes this time with his dad and makes it a point to do it as often as they can. Conversely, they build Yuna a mother in law house when David passes away (death comes for us all) and she becomes crazy hockey mom to all their rookies.

Add your ownnnnn