this would have got 100k notes as a tumblr post in 2018
TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr
h
sheepfilms
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
occasionally subtle
almost home

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untitled

Andulka
noise dept.
todays bird

bliss lane
One Nice Bug Per Day
Sade Olutola
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
hello vonnie

titsay

No title available
Game of Thrones Daily

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club

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@jiamekare
this would have got 100k notes as a tumblr post in 2018
The Catalogue of Ships in the Iliad is, to a modern audiences, what classicists have called “boring as hell,” but I can’t help but think that if you were watching Homer recite it it would have been more like when comedians go, “anybody here tonight from Chicago?” and the Chicagoans in the back start cheering
Homer’s like, “and there were forty black ships from… LOCRIS” and the Locrians in the crowd start going absolutely nuts
idk man not to sound like a cartoon hippie but if your entirrrrre blog and dash is about how the world sucks and everyones bigoted i think you are going to give yorself brain worms
"ah but all of this is important and true and if i dont reblog all of this important stuff waga baga THE WORMS! THATS WORMS! THE BRAIN WORMS!
i do not think you are doing activism chief i think what you are doing is sitting in your room flagellating yourself expecting something to happen
would you look at that, fandom.com has started adding completely content-blocking popups to their page that totally prevent you from using the site unless you turn ad block off.
it sure would be a shame if people went to their URL bar and typed "anti" in front of "fandom.com" in order to go to the antifandom.com mirror of the page they were trying to reach, which shows all the same content but without any ads,
a fantastic option when it's available.
however i'm not creating a wiki, i'm trying to look at a convenient and easily-accessed database of blorbo screenshots that fans before me already made. if they had made a non-fandom wiki, i wouldn't need antifandom. this post is for other people in the same boat.
do you think the dc universe has a news site like the onion that’s just like…
“meddling parents still alive, preventing bruce wayne from adopting yet anther orphan”
“new study shows that 87% of all americans class superman as american citizen despite being born on a different planet, but only 49% avoided eye contact when asked about why martian manhunter doesn’t count”
“area woman thanking her lucky stars that batman and superman fell out on the same day she was due to go to boss’ niece’s bat mitzvah”
“arkham guard astonished by trip to iron heights, only now learning what locks are for”
“area man pretty sure he should be making more than $60k a year if his boss has 10 billion dollars to waste on robotic exosuit”
“breaking news: lex luthor sues superman for loss of earnings, claims that continually losing fights to him is negatively affecting his work ethic”
“Hub City mayor declares state of unemergency after two hours without a violent crime”
“grown man who dresses in halloween costume every night thinks clown his biggest problem”
“disappointed child realizes Booster Gold at birthday party the real one, not just a guy in a costume”
“drunk Aquaman rampages through ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ ride”
“new Teen Titan not attached to any Justice League member wonders why they’ve been issued a uniform with a red shirt”
“Earth totally not a tax haven, say Green Lantern Corps as they assign eighth lantern to same planet”
“’no one knows how to stop him’ says armed police officer as non-powered clown-themed supervillain begins 82nd massacre this year”
Halfway through these I forgot that these were supposed to be Onion headlines and not actual headlines for the DC universe.
trans women seeing themselves in someone and being honest about it and encouraging someone to transition is not “transvestigating” i will kill you so hard
“transvestigating” is a transmisogynistic harassment ritual that cis people carry out to further the stereotypes of predatory trans women. i will kill you
I don't understand how cis people obsessed with gender norms think trans people are the weird ones. they're going around believing that your name has to correlate to your genitals. your fashion has to correlate to your genitals. your behaviours have to correlate to your genitals. your hobbies have to correlate to your genitals. who you date has to correlate to your genitals. whether you can put sparkles on your eyelids or not has to correlate to your genitals. and then people like me go "hmm. I might not do that. maybe I'll just do what feels fun and okay instead" and they LOSE their MINDS
The Odyssey but retold as a low-stakes modern adventure of one guy out with his girlfriend leaving the bar with his buddies to do just one (1) simple thing real quick, it'll take like 15 minutes tops, he'll be right back, but then some bullshit happens and the trip keeps getting more complicated as more bullshit keeps happening while he just tries to get back to the bar because he promised his girlfriend that he'd get back and he knows that she's still there because she told him she'd wait there.
And by the time he finally gets back it's almost 3 am and the bar is about to close while she's sitting there stone cold sober, surrounded by 5 drunk guys unsuccessfully trying to convince her to give up on waiting for him and go home with one of them instead. And the guy shows up to proceed to beat the shit out of them before explaining himself to her like hey sorry bullshit kept happening, my phone fell into a storm drain and my wallet got stolen when I was trying to find someone who'd borrow me a phone so I could call and
His girlfriend had been fending off the 5 drunk guys for most of the evening by explaining that even if she was going to ditch her boyfriend, she can't possibly leave without finishing her beer, which she is keeping perpetually full via careful sleight of hand where she's just pouring it back and forth into and out of the pitcher.
However the drunk guys are also drinking, and eventually she can't afford to buy another pitcher for the table so she can't keep up the ever-full beer glass trick. At this point she has to resort to setting up the pool trick shot that she's never seen anyone but her boyfriend pull off, and says she'll leave with whoever manages the shot first.
That buys her another hour or so and then, finally, her boyfriend makes it back. He looks like shit, hair down and just a mess, he's wearing an entirely different jacket that he got from an alley, and barely recognizable—especially to 5 guys who've been drunk for hours now. He lurks for a minute, finds out what's going on, and proceeds to pull off the trick shot first try. Throws the jacket off, fixes his hair with a hair tie his girlfriend lends him, finally looks like himself again, and THEN beats the shit out of them with the pool cue.
yuh i was there, that's how it happened
AO3 Writer Affirmations:
I do not have to reinvent the wheel every time I write fanfiction
I do not have to make every chapter's word count above 1,000 in order for it to be good
It is okay if some things don't make sense
I can write whatever I want
I am writing this shit for free
If people don't like my stuff, they can block me. If they're being mean about it, I can block them.
The most important part of writing fanfiction is having fun
Writing fanfiction is supposed to be fun
I do not have to appeal to people
This shit is fun
I am doing this all for free, and anyone who objects can go eat wet sand and worms from the sidewalk
Totally normal for a legitimate for-profit company to refuse to reclaim or stop running their products even after they're no longer being paid to do so. I'm sure it's very normal to just keep running your service for free when your contract's been terminated. Spending money to continue running cameras that supposedly no one is looking at is definitely not an indicator they are just run by the federal government to spy on everyone and only a wacko conspiracy theorist would think so.
It is so ridiculously easy to gain a reputation for being competent by just reading signs.
This is not metaphorical. I mean actual, literal pieces of paper/plastic/metal/whatever explicitly erected to inform the public.
“How did you know this was the right trail?” I read the sign.
“Wow, how did you know what that flower is?” There’s a SIGN.
“How did you know we needed to use the side door?” THERE IS A SIGN POSTED ON THE FRONT DOOR.
Just…why are we having such different experiences of the world? People can read. I KNOW they can read. There’s nothing wrong with their vision.
Just. READ. THE. GOD. DAMN. SIGN.
This also applies to:
Syllabi
Instructions
Plain text of the small text:
This also applies to:
Syllabi
Instructions
THIS ALSO APPLIES TO ERROR CODES.
at least now we know why he has yet to return when Britain is in peril
We need a flick where King Arthur wakes in modern Jamaica and is very confused.
I think that would be so much funny. He wakes up on a remote beach in Jamaica and he only speaks/understands Brythonic and Medieval Latin. Locals assume he was a tourist who fell from a cruise ship or received a head injury and floated away from a resort. The authorities cannot match his description to any missing persons reports and his fingerprints and DNA produce no hits on INTERPOL. They suspect he may be Welsh or French because the language he speaks resembles Welsh or Breton but France and the UK both state he is not a citizen of their country. Stateless and deeply confused, he is taken in by the community near the beach where he was found, being cared for by a number of local families and doing odd jobs. He slowly learns English and adjusts to the contemporary world, uncertain if his belief that he is the legendary King Arthur was formed by whatever traumatic event caused him to end up Jamaica or if he is actually King Arthur and Prydain is in eminent peril. Mysterious letters from Morgan begin to reaffirm his belief he is King Arthur. He must choose between staying in Jamaica and continuing the happy life he has made for himself or finding a way to get back to Britain without any documentation.
ancient king white boy stuns locals by ordering in perfect Jamaican Patois
He gets to Britain and everyone expects him to sound like a posh noble Englishman because that is the picture Malory painted but he prefers to speak Welsh and when he has to speak English, he speaks with a thick Jamaican accent.
I read etiquette and homemaking guides from the 1800s mostly because they're a FASCINATING insight into cultural norms that we often don't think about. I honestly really recommend people crack one of these open at least once--it goes way beyond, like, "what to wear to a ball!!!"
The best ones have advice on decor, how to select high-quality furniture, childrearing, fashion, etc--from a contemporary perspective, and the things the authors feel the need to clarify vs the wild shit that will just casually mention like it's something everyone knows and agrees on is REALLY revealing of the culture and how it's shifted.
And while a lot of the advice is WILDLY bigoted or just outright funny, you'd be surprised how much of it is...just genuinely timeless, and shockingly compassionate.
They ALSO, as a writer, have INVALUABLE resources--because, again, they're talking about things that are so MUNDANE that a lot of the time nobody really sat down to formally document what normal, everyday people thought or cared about--because that's boring! But a book written to provide advice and information to, say, a young woman who's never run her own home before? You can fully expect an entire chapter dedicated to The Types Of Oven, and which features are useful and worth spending money on, and which features are a huge hassle to clean and a waste of space, and what to spend that money on instead.
And like. As a writer who frequently works in the 1800s? Fuck inflation calculators, this is the kind of thing I need. This is absolutely priceless.
Now that being said.
My current favorite 'etiquette guide' in the world is actually like....70% purely practical advice, written by a gentleman the groupchat has affectionately dubbed History's Most Autistic Man In The World, and thank god they didn't have Aderall back then
Because the AuDHD is strong in this one and as a result, in addition to the deeply practical and useful everyday reference points, we also have:
Hell yeah CLRG!
how it feels to wash your hair and brush your teeth and have clean clothes on
ooooo you wanna take a shower so bad
I mean, in some very interesting Technically Correct ways, they didn't actually die? Now, they're very much no longer alive. But the forces involved are such that they didn't get any of the usual cellular processes of death, they simply went from biology to physics in less time than it takes a signal to travel down your optic nerve.
if you go from biology to physics without dying first you don’t go to heaven the uber driver went over this already
Haven’t posted about plastic in a minute. Rest assured, I am still hard at work eating all plastic on earth
They could never hurt me in any way that matters. I will not be kept from my calling