devastating when good characters are put into a stupid show. you were born to fly but that evil hag of a showrunner clipped your golden wings. be free on ao3, my little dove. be free
Misplaced Lens Cap
Today's Document

shark vs the universe

JVL

Kiana Khansmith
we're not kids anymore.
tumblr dot com
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
YOU ARE THE REASON

if i look back, i am lost

pixel skylines
Monterey Bay Aquarium
d e v o n
Stranger Things
Claire Keane
No title available
macklin celebrini has autism

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
Show & Tell

No title available
seen from Spain
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Ecuador
seen from Argentina
seen from United States
seen from Belarus

seen from Colombia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Tunisia

seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Russia
seen from Brazil
seen from Jamaica
@kimberellaroo
devastating when good characters are put into a stupid show. you were born to fly but that evil hag of a showrunner clipped your golden wings. be free on ao3, my little dove. be free
Ilya: Baby I'm drunk. Can you pick us up?
Shane: Us?
Ilya: *sends a selfie of himself with a stray dog he found*
ok but now imagine it was a selfie of himself with a stuffed racoon holding an empty vodka bottle
Russell T Davies having the Doctor regenerate into Billie Piper hoping this would resurrect interest in the show, only for the twist to be mocked to hell and back by everyone & make both fans and the general public turn on it even harder
You know what would have been cooler way of bringing back Billie Piper? If the Master came back regenerated into the form of Rose Tyler, because that would fuck the Doctor up bad. Especially because from memory the Master and Rose never meet, so the Master could have no idea that this form is important to the Doctor, she's just going about doing megalomaniac Mastery things when the Doctor finds out
married hollanov last names
hyphenated (hollander-rozanov)
hyphenated (rozanov-hollander)
hyphenated but ilya is rozanov-hollander & shane is hollander-rozanov
hyphenated but only unofficially / something they call each other for funsies
ilya takes hollander, shane takes rozanov
both are hollander
both are rozanov
other (irina’s maiden name?? hollanov or rozander???)
no change, both keep their own names
important factor, would their hyphenated names fit on their hockey jerseys?
And then hockey commentators give up and start referring to them by their numbers, because otherwise they have to say things like "Hollander-Rozanov passes to Hollander-Rozanov... Who sets up an assist for Hollander-Rozanov" (or vice versa)
okay so @writerxwren ‘s farawyn/anti booktok post made me come back to this line of thought I’ve had for a while so it’s not wholly my idea BUT
I think one of the reasons wildehopps as a ship is so beloved amongst fans of these films (and just in general on the internet) is because they are the quintessential booktok romance done right. they are the best version of what everyone goes to booktok looking for. In fact, I’d go as far as to say they’re the most Jane Austen-coded couple I’ve seen in a long time. Hear me out okay I’m going somewhere with this
I don’t personally frequent booktok (I don’t have the TikTok app, I get all my info from YouTube or Tumblr), but as a writer who knows sometimes ya gotta dig into bad stories in order to figure out what makes them bad, I know enough about what that side of the internet enjoys in the way of tropes. Normally, I’m not someone who would suggest writing a story based on tropes alone, but even I can agree that having one in mind can be helpful in figuring out your characters’ dynamics and arcs. The most widely talked about romantic tropes on the clock app to my knowledge are enemies-to-lovers and banter and grumpy/sunshine and slow burn and an MMC who would ruin the world for his love, to name a few. The problem I’ve found with most booktok promoted books, however, is that these tropes are taken and written without an understanding of what makes them work. Enemies become lovers in 50 pages, the banter is spiteful and mean or just downright not clever (the ‘should I call you Prince, or pathetic?’ ‘You could’ve just called me yours’ audio I hear on YouTube drives. Me. Insane.), the sunshine is almost always a ditz or a show-off who falls head-over-heels for the grump, a controlling manchild who just wants someone to sleep with, and the “burning of the world to protect her” becomes so unhealthily close to obsession that it’s frightening for the girl in question.
all of these ideas are used without digging any deeper into why they originally clicked with readers, before they were so overdone that everyone sort of rolls their eyes at just hearing about them. they’re the frosting on a hollow cake: you might have something that tastes sweet at first, but there’s zero depth, and you’re left unsatisfied.
and here’s why I think wildehopps does it all right where many others get it wrong.
think about it for a second. Judy is the optimistic, bubbly girl boss who takes no bull from anybody. she’s witty and intelligent and would fight the sun if she were capable and angry enough. She’s what all the booktok FMCs want to be, but what makes her different is that she’s also kind. She can be gentle with those around her. She’s emotional, she allows herself to cry and embrace her loved ones. She likes to dress up (as seen in the z2 gala scene) and enjoy more feminine things, she’s a girl’s girl (“I love your hair!” as a seemingly innocuous moment that ends up saving hers and Nick’s life), she always sticks her neck out for someone in need, she is so very invested in doing the right thing no matter what. She is not a stoic soldier who only thinks of herself and how powerful she could be. And what else? It makes her flawed. She bore hurtful biases against Nick in z1, even if she didn’t realize it. She has a savior complex that gets her in trouble, a tiny thirst for glory she doesn’t truly recognize in herself. She’s prideful and pushes herself too hard because she’s scared that the world could perceive her as weak and unskillful. A dumb bunny. Despite being a rabbit, she feels incredibly human. Real.
And Nick! He is the textbook example of the snarky MMC with a dark past but a heart of gold buried beneath his tough exterior. He can be shifty, he behaves as though nothing anyone says can wound him, and he would do anything, even give up his own life, to make sure Judy is safe. He smirks nonstop, but his sincere smiles vastly outshine them. He even does the “lean against the doorframe” thing that’s so popular right now, but in more of an endearingly awkward, “I can’t let Judy see my shrine of her just inside my apartment” than seductive way. He is what everyone tries to write the Perfect Boyfriend as, yet like Judy, what makes him different is that his flaws are not treated like points of attraction, but like traits he must work on and learn to overcome. His inability to open up with Judy about his past and his fear of losing her isn’t expressed as though he were the dark and brooding bad boy, the tortured prince who was dealt a rotten hand in life (though never actually tries to fix it). His silence is a problem in his partnership with Judy. It’s something to sympathize with but it isn’t a characteristic of being attractive, it isn’t good that Nick bottles his feelings up and plans never to share them with the best thing that ever happened to him. The films correctly portray Nick as hurting himself because he’s choosing not to be honest with his partner. It doesn’t make him mysterious, it makes him relatable, someone you actively root for to improve.
Even better, when he does decide to take the leap, he ends up being incredibly vulnerable with Judy—“I make jokes about your ears and I tell you that you try too hard, when the truth is I just don’t want you to get hurt.”—which she reciprocates because she knows she can trust him with her emotions. Nick has endured hell and back and does not want to be alone any longer, but never once is this conveyed as “uwu soft morally gray Prince Charming” by the narrative. He is not a SJM type character, he’s just a decent guy who’s attempting to turn himself around by virtue of his altruistic partner’s faith in him.
Furthermore, Nick isn’t controlling or manipulative of Judy. He’s sly and sneaky in the first film, but he never does anything that could hurt her, even before they were friends. He never throws her into danger and expects her to find her own way out of it, he never coerces her into situations she would be uncomfortable with (apart from the Naturalist Club, though he gives Judy an out before they even go in and she doesn’t take it), he never uses her for his own means. His love isn’t based on what she can do for him. It isn’t self-centered. She is not his plaything, she is his person.
Speaking of that, unlike several, confusingly popular booktok couples (Rhysand and Feyre, Paedyn and Kai, Violet and Xaden, etc.), we actually comprehend as an audience why Judy and Nick love each other. While yes, it is a family-friendly series so you can’t go too deeply into it regardless, and physical attraction is necessary to an extent, Nick doesn’t love Judy because she’s “hot” or “sexy”. There’s no ogling of her physique, no fixation on outer beauty. He dislikes her a great deal in the beginning, but what wins him over is her compassion, her resilience, her idealism, and her belief in who he could be. She’s passionate and she’s brave, smart and relentless. And she gave him a chance, showed him there was more to life than just surviving. And when it comes to protecting her, yes he does it because he doesn’t want to lose her, but he also cannot stomach her being in pain. He stands up for her when her career is threatened, he is always looking for a way to comfort her through gentle touches. Instead of “burning the world down for her”, he shields her from the fiery darts by taking them for himself. He doesn’t take away her agency by stopping her from doing her job just because it’s dangerous, rather he walks through the mayhem with her, even whilst being afraid. He is ride or die for his bunny without a doubt, and I know we as a fandom like to joke about them being codependent, but Nick isn’t snarling at anyone who so much as looks at her (in z2, he only began to show his jealousy when Pawbert was actively flirting with her). He isn’t romanticizing being feral or insane about her. He loves her for who she is, and she for him. They would do anything for each other. Selflessness.
Same with Judy. She loves him because he’s intelligent and cunning, he believes in her when no one else does, he brings her back down to earth when her head is in the clouds, and he’s a profoundly considerate person as well as fairly emotionally intelligent when he’s encouraged to be. He’s good, and she wants to see him be good, she wants him to excel to his fullest potential. Like Nick, she would give up the rest of her days in a heartbeat if it meant he would be safe from harm; in Zootopia 2’s climax, she throws herself off a wall to reach him without having any idea Gary was behind her to catch her. She was willing to die with him if she couldn’t rescue him. She wants what’s best for her fox without asking for anything in return.
Then there’s the age gap. From what I’ve seen, people on booktok love age gap romances. Specifically if it’s between a 19 yr old human girl and a 500+ yr old faerie man. Good stuff, for sure (I say in complete sarcasm). Not only is it incredibly creepy that an eldritch god would be dating a teenager just because she’s “the chosen one”, it also adds a power imbalance that makes it so he is always in control over her, and she must go along with whatever he decides is best for her. He labels it as being protective, but it’s nothing more than abuse given the girl literally cannot fight back, or she’ll be punished in some magical, Lovecraftian way. Because these MMCs are never emotionally stable.
Nick and Judy, though? Boom, baby, 8 yr age gap. Far more reasonable than hundreds of years in between. As of z2, Judy is 25 and Nick is 33. Both are well into adulthood, thus nothing creepy can be construed, and there is no power imbalance because they are equal partners. They work together, they share the weight of the world together. She may be leading the team but she does not boss him around or force him to do whatever she says because she’s saying it, and he most certainly doesn’t follow like a subservient puppy…he goes where she goes so that he can keep her safe. In the second movie, when Nick proposes running away together to Outback Island about a dozen times during the mystery, to Judy’s consistent refusal, at any moment he is free to walk away. She wants him with her, but she isn’t keeping him there against his will. Still, Nick doesn’t leave her. The age gap is wonderful too because it allows Nick to have some knowledge of life and the way the world works that Judy doesn’t without it seeming as though he has an advantage over her. Her view of the city needing someone to help make it better is her hopeful mindset not having been crushed by the cruelties of reality yet, and Nick insisting the world is what it is, Carrots, is his reality rearing its ugly head. She gives him hope to dream, he reminds her not to let her imagination run away with her. Time and past trauma has cultivated who they are, but together, they’re learning they can be more than that.
Oh, and the banter. “It’s called a hustle, sweetheart.” “I think you’d actually make a pretty good cop.” “Ugh, how dare you.” “I was small and emotionally unbalanced like you, once.” “Har har.” “Darling, I think you’re giving me white hairs.” “Oh, I’m sorry, is my fear hilarious to you?” “No, of course not. We’re partners, and whenever I’m uncomfortable, you’re always very considerate of my feelings—LOOK OUT SNAKE SKIN!” “What is your problem? Does seeing me fail somehow make you feel better about your own sad, miserable life?” “It does, 100%.” “Love ya, partner. But I am still me, so you’re only getting that once a decade.” “Hopps and Wilde?” “Wilde and Hopps!” Listen, I could go on forever, okay?
And unlike dozens of booktok stories that claim to be “slow burns” yet get the main two characters together 3/4 of the way into the first book, Nick and Judy are a genuine slow burn. The way it’s looking, they won’t officially be together until around the end of the final movie in their trilogy! Unless Disney decides to make more than three installments in the franchise, it’s going to take almost the entirety of their story to come together. That’s a freaking snail’s pace and I love it, it’s torturous.
wildehopps is the enemies-to-lovers, grumpy/sunshine, slow burn, girlboss/chill guy ship booktok goes nuts over, but they’re characterized with depth. they’re fleshed out, they behave like actual people, they aren’t obsessed with physical appearances (again, family movies, but even still), and their love for each other is based on self-sacrifice. Judy is not a power-wielding boss babe who demands praise and worship from absolutely everybody, Nick is not a violent or possessive dark lord who hurts his partner but calls it love. They didn’t like each other upon first meeting, but mutual understanding and fondness shaped them into friends, and unwavering loyalty through hardship further shaped them into what we can safely assume will one day be romantic partners. They look after each other. They are best friends that are also in love. As Jared Bush himself has said, they are soulmates.
yes, I’m very aware it’s a disney movie, made to primarily be enjoyed by kids with families around. you have different guidelines when you work with animated films, I get it. nevertheless, what makes these two so compelling is the fact that they are what so many look for in fictional relationships done healthily (minus the smut but tbh, is that really necessary?). so, uh. writers on booktok, do better. Read more Jane Austen. A fox and a bunny are outpacing y’all. anyway thank you for coming to my ted talk
Merry Fuckmas mates
it is important to me that an ongoing bit for ilya is just throwing out wild numbers for how many kids hayden has
literally in an interview talking about ties to montreal for shane and ilya just, "well, we go back often. pike is annoying, but his eleven children? very cute."
in a vid on the team's insta with a baby and just teasing shane as an aside, "does this make you nostalgiac for your godchildren? or did it get old by pike's ninth?"
they're at all stars and a fan is asking who ilya is most excited to see? yeah yeah, all of pike's twenty children. they had to rent a bus, yes, but very good to see them all.
I've seen a similar gag play out when my brother played junior rugby, and a lot of the parents at the club were pretty good friends through the kids. the favourite gag by this one guy was that every time he referred to his friend's kids (there were 5 over a big age range) the number would increase, so it would be "his half dozen kids" then "guy's got like 10 kids" then "I don't know, a dozen kids" "how do you feed your entire rugby team of kids", "what have you got, like 25 kids?" etc. and then after all that this one time the dad refers to his own kids and the menace guy turns to him and says "oh, I didn't know you had kids" like he's genuinely surprised to find this out, and everyone who'd been following the joke for so long kind of lost it.
This seems like exactly the kind of thing Ilya would do
something i don't see talked about a lot but always makes me emotional on re-reads of tlg is the fact that even after shane is unwillingly outed to the world, and as a direct result:
unjustly suspended from his job
condemned by one of his best friends
condemned by his teammates
dissected by the media
threatened by the commissioner
accused of cheating at the sport he has dedicated his whole life to; and
raked over the coals for a true accident
he STILL goes to watch ilya play
without question or concern, he sits in the audience to watch ilya in round 2 alongside the team that just kicked him out of the playoffs and caused tripgate
he spends tlg in debilitating fear over the possibility of someone figuring them out and goes to such extreme lengths to keep that from happening that he doesn't even have a photograph to show for an 11-year relationship
but still, ilya mentions he can get tickets for shane and his parents to come see him play and shane doesn't spend a second worrying it may fuel rumours, bring unwanted attention to his relationship, put him in a generally uncomfortable position - he actually brightens at the suggestion and then happily sits in the audience to cheer ilya on 😭
Also consider that as a kid growing up in Ottawa, the Centaurs were his local team, he would have been a fan. And how rare it would have been for him as an adult since his hockey career started to just be able to attend a game in the audience with his parents, because he's so busy during the hockey season, he'd pretty much be always playing or focussing on his own games, aside from being injured. It's the first time in a long time that he's able to go to a game and enjoy the energy of being in the audience, a fan in the crowd, rather than the intense focus and hard work of playing. He can relax a little and enjoy it like a kid again with his family, supporting the team he loved as a kid and supporting the man he loves now.
extremely funny to think about shane getting called Mr. Hollander by a starry-eyed rookie for the first time a few years into his career and having a Moment of Realization about the sympathy cringe scott must have felt when he called him mr. hunter and just internally error 404 oh jesus christ a merciful god would have killed me before i ever discovered this oh fuck oh shit-
and meanwhile the poor lil rook who was just so excited to meet their hero is just ??? mr. hollander??? are you okay???
Meanwhile some chirpy upstart rookie is openly calling Ilya an old man. The kid's mocking him on the ice by using his hockey stick like a walking stick, wagging his finger and mumbling about rookies these days, and Ilya is battling between amusement and offense because that is the sort of shit he used to do.
Scott thinks it's hilarious
I do think it's super fun that TLG gives us a lil' preview of what Shane is going to be like on the Cens:
Which is to say sitting on the bench trading off between endless bickering and gossiping about other players
I like finding out what people my age and older had as their first cell phone. Anybody younger and their answer is a generic Android or iPhone. Phones from the 2000s were some wacky device like the sidekick or samsung x83 or lg env2
My first phone was a nokia 1112 in 2008
I was really looking forward to getting my first phone, I asked my parents for one, I dropped a lot of heavy hints about the sort of phone I wanted because so many of my friends at school had phones, they had Nokia's and other early 2000s phones with pink cases and charms and cool ringtones. Phones were already a bit of a status symbol, and this was when you could buy ringtones. And so my parents bought me a mobile phone for Christmas. I opened up my present and found a nice sensible, boring one of these:
And I smiled and thanked my parents for it because they'd decided I was old enough and had given me a phone like I asked and I didn't want to seem ungrateful, but meanwhile in front of my oblivious, but well-meaning parents my entire thoughts were "oh no. Who sends their teenage daughter to school with a SEMEN phone, I am going to get teased so bad for that"
(it doesn't matter if it's actually pronounced like "Simons", I was going to a high school full of teenagers in an English-speaking country, I knew this was going to end up semen)
Anyway that phone very rarely came out of the pocket of my school bag.
And then maybe 3 years later I was able to upgrade to a hot pink Motorola Razr v3 which had a colour screen and polyphonic ringtones and a camera and I was very excited about it.
I like finding out what people my age and older had as their first cell phone. Anybody younger and their answer is a generic Android or iPhone. Phones from the 2000s were some wacky device like the sidekick or samsung x83 or lg env2
My first phone was a nokia 1112 in 2008
anyone else relate
I wanna go out, but I wanna stay home
you ever just sit and realise u can’t remember 80% of your childhood? like … what happened? who am i ..?
Many people in the comments are saying “trauma”, but this is actually a very normal occurrence. It’s called Childhood Amnesia, and it’s a process which, as the brain reorganizes itself for cognitive thought that is developed in late childhood, it changes the Accessibility of those memories during recall. Many childhood memories are available to the person, but they will not be remembered during regular recall activity, you have to “trick” your brain into remembering with different tactics.
This is because there are two parts to memories - their encoding and their recall. The encoding determines their availability, their recall determines their accessibility. The reason why trauma memory and childhood amnesia are different is in this distinction. Trauma memory is often encoded differently, bypassing to the limbic system where it is stored as intrinsic memory. It can’t be recalled because it was never encoded. Childhood amnesia, however, seems to indicate that the memories are encoded, but we lose access to them as we age. This is most likely due to the development of brain structures that fundamentally change our encoding and recall of memory as we get older.
This is an important distinction, because trauma memory is “stored in the body”, i.e. you get triggers that send your body into a cascade of uncontrollable feelings, sensations and reactions. Whereas childhood memories won’t generally do that, they are just recalled at odd times with odd associations.
reblogging this because I’ve legit seen people freaking out when they realised they can’t remember some of their childhood, thinking they might have some repressed trauma.
I find that my early childhood memories are mostly little snippets of random things that I guess might have been the things I focused on as a child, which may not have been the most important thing actually happening. Which sometimes makes me feel guilty if the forgotten part is something REALLY important. And then I talk to my parents sometimes and they'll say "oh you might have been too young to remember this event" And I start to say "no" and then "hang on, I don't remember the actual event, but I remember dropping my favourite stuffed toy in a puddle in the carpark at the hospital" and they may look at me strangely that this was the thing that stayed in my head for 30 years, but we talk about it and they fill in the gaps and give context. And maybe sometimes I start to remember a little more or sometimes I don't, but at least I know more of the story around it
Cliff can't believe he didn't figure it out sooner. The strange move to Ottawa. How happy he's been. And most damming of all, "Jane", it fucking rhymes!
He watches a highlight reel of Ilya celebrating with his line and realizes he's just going to have to accept it.
Ilya was in love with Zane Boodram.
I love the idea of Shane being not just good at hockey but good at all sports, to the point where it fascinates and infuriates the other Centaurs
Because what do you mean they went to the batting cages for some silly fun to watch everyone flail at an unfamiliar sport, only for Shane to need three practice swings before figuring out the force and timing needed to start hitting every single pitch? What do you mean he sets the course record at the mini golf place they have the Pike twins birthday at? What do you mean he learned how to play cricket over a long weekend in the UK? What do you MEAN your Canadian ass that grew up on a calm, tiny lake went to visit Rose in LA and just learned to surf from “some guy” one of the days she was busy??
Shane doesn’t get why they all think it’s so crazy. He’s a professional athlete, he’s good at full body and mind control as well as adaptability and hand-eye coordination, and he’s so used to being the best in the world at hockey that he views being mundanely good at anything else as barely noticeable. He argues with Troy over whether he counts as being good at basketball just because he killed them all at the basketball shooting game at a Dave and Buster’s
They all start making bets to see who can find a sport Hollander isn’t good at. Harris is convinced he’ll win with figure skating because Shane’s muscle memory will want to work against him with a technique that’s so similar but also so different, only for Shane to come out of an afternoon learning from his old friend who was at the Olympics with the ability to do simple jumps and spins and is insisting the whole team learn so they can incorporate it into plays. Harris is not allowed to make suggestions after that
Ilya just sits back and lustily watches his husband destroy their friends at volley ball, wrestling, tennis, broom ball, and ultimate frisbee. Shane participates in an all pro athlete Ninja Warrior event to raise money for charity and Ilya can’t watch the clips of Shane flying through the course like a bat out of hell unless he is able to fuck Shane immediately after it ends
And when we say sports we mean all sports and sport-adjacent games. They line him up for beer pong, Shane rolls his eyes and says "come on guys, this is getting stupid, I don't even drink", chucks the pingpong ball haphazardly and immediately nails it.
It leaves everyone a little spooked at how naturally he managed to do that
Ilya is the white woman who rescues "kitties" and "puppies" from the sides of roads only to bring them to vets who go "this is a mountain lion/coyote/cougar/lynx pup" and on one occasion that Shane will never let him live down "this is a bear cub".
Shane has the nearest wildlife sanctuaries/rehabs at the Cottage and in Ottawa on speed dial. They're on a first name basis with Ilya and most of them don't even know Ilya or Shane play hockey they're just "the Russian with the white woman animal whispering powers and his long suffering husband"
Ilya comes jogging back to the campsite carrying an animal wrapped in his hoodie: "I found this poor dog abandoned in the woods! Can we keep him?"
Shane freaking out: "Ilya, that's a baby moose, where is the mother"