[insert cool reference here]

Ives / 24 Did tumblr make the description font smaller girl send help

[zoesupreme]

I have started following the journey of a German soccer fan in the US for the world cup

[zoesupreme]

[zoesupreme]

[zoesupreme]

[zoesupreme]

@laeffy the euros have found buc-ee's

[zoesupreme]

[apatheticfluorescence]

some hyper famous artists like Van Gogh transcend overratedness and become underrated because they're so normalized. Like I'll look at a van Gogh and I'm like wait this really is amazing you guys don't get it

[headspace-hotel]

Shakespeare is like this

[insufferablepirate]

Every time I see a Van Gogh that’s not one of his better known pieces it absolutely blows me away

Have you seen this shit my liege? smh unreal

[lakevida]

on it boss

[zanmor]

step 1: mitosis

[joshpeck]

still being active on tumblr is camp

[fucignwimdy]

this post is gonna blow up even more when op deactivates

[joshpeck]

i'll outlive everything you love

[spookyrollerdisco]

Nicole Kidman leaving her lawyer’s office after finalising her divorce with Tom Cruise

[cloevr]

this is how i want everyone’s summer to feel like

[iamoutofideas]

fucking sick of my insolent subjects

[kallistoi]

[image description: a screenshot of text messages.

person 1: burgies you in them

person 1: burgies

person 1 in all caps: buries

person 2: burgies

person 2: perhaps her highness should consider eating a spellingberry.

end description.]

[theonion]

Terrified Introvert One Away From Bingo

[icekingnicekingville]

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

the worst thing about those fancy pears is that you think “there’s no way a pear could be worth that much” but if you actually make the mistake of tasting one you will be forced to confront the fact that what you thought was pleasure is but a shadow of a shadow and there is a world out there more real than real that your senses have been waiting for, where the colors are richer and the water is wetter and sleep is refreshing. and you’re not invited.

[chaumas-deactivated20240115]

if you are ever offered a bite of one of these do not take it because you will live the rest of your life unsatisfied by sensory pleasures

[ryebreadedd]

they should bring back the name Wolfgang tbh.

[ryebreadedd]

?

[kragehund-est]

dont piss me off. next time you go on a trip im filling your house with galapagos finches. by the time you return, they've evolved to fill your niche. they're a better spouse to your partner. they're a better parent for your child. and? they're a better friend to me than you ever were.

[kragehund-est]

one time i accidentally left a flock of galapagos finches overnight in the music store i worked in. by the time i punched into work the next day, they had evolved to fill the niches of each instrument. now they're a world-renowned band. maybe you've heard of... fleetwood mac?

[mosslingg]

My liege im sorry to break it to you but your advisor that's actually evil and wants you dead turned out to be straight. I know you really wanted to have an enemies to lovers situation with him. Yeah I'm afraid the poisoning didn't hold any romantic intent behind it. The king of the enemy kingdom is bisexual though, I could send him a letter? Yes, I'll make sure to include multiple threats of homoerotic nature. You will have your toxic yaoi, my liege

[polari]

if i see one more concubine bring her straight eunuch to pride

[loveridden1999]

"this too shall pass" sure but have you considered the fact that i don't like the way it's passing

[curioscurio]

If "this too" could stop passing like a kidney stone that would be great thanks

[carygrantsbeard]

HELPPPPPPPPPP

[gorbling]

Im enjoying the longevity of tumblrs recontextualization style of humor. a seemingly innocuous post followed by like "posts that a gnome would make" or like "are you a phone"

[gorbling]

[hapalopus]

[hapalopus]

More from the notes:

[vexwerewolf]

I love this post

[karifaevt]

The horse thinks as it scratches an itch

[cryptotheism]

Me, two glasses of wine in: "yeah so here's an in depth conversation about my identity as a nonbinary person, and my struggles with transphobia in 2023"

Median Center-Right American Dude at the party, also two drinks in: "Damn that's crazy, I never thought of it like that. Man, I'm sorry you gotta deal with this shit."

Me: "Ahh it's alright. I deal."

Random Guy: "People should just chill tf out."

Me: "Damn right"

[cryptotheism]

Random Guy: "So if you're non binary, and, sorry if this is offensive but I don't know the right words here. Like, is it cross dressing for you if you wear a skirt?"

Me: "Its- hm. Huh. I have no idea."

[cryptotheism]

Guy: "It must have been nice to go to school with other trans people. Like, you must've felt safe."

Me: "No actually it was the opposite. It just made me even more upset and confused. I didn't know what being non-binary was. I saw people that transitioned from one gender to the other and knew I wasn't that. It took me a long time to figure this shit out."

Guy: "man that sounds rough. No wonder you guys are upset all this time this sounds painful."

Me: "Well, it sucks until it suddenly doesn't. It sucks and then it rules hard."

Guy: "so It's like working out."

Me: [both of us are now nodding wisely] "it's like working out."

[cryptotheism]

Guy who has only ever played undertale seeing a skeleton for the first time: "holy shit"