All The Things

Mom to all

[bobertlutece]

this whole thing is way too good to be giffed you need to expirience it 

[havekidslaughmore]

Amazing and I needed a good laugh

[pr1nceshawn]

Amputees With A Great Sense Of Humor

[bulwarksbrain]

This means a lot to me

[nunyabizni]

That Buzz Lightyear one killed me

[undeadwill]

These are the best.

[reformed-roark]

[darkhairedgirlfromgallifrey-dea]

These kind of people are my favorite bless them

[angrybeardedbastard]

Sense of humor is everything

[callmesnake72-deactivated202407]

I will always reblog this

[becausebirds]

potty mouth bird

[lrukasensei]

[Caption:

[WOMAN (OFF-CAMERA):] He’s gonna come sit by you.

[MAN:] That’s crazy!

[WOMAN (LAUGHING):] Try to pet him.

[MAN:] No, nah, he’s got that big-ass beak on him!

[BIRD:] Fuck you!

[MAN (LAUGHING):] Fuck you?!]

[oldiesporvida-deactivated201903]

One of my favorite videos 😂

[mariarussell26]

Yesssss

[girlactionfigure]

[fosterbeginnings]

Sealed

I had been under the assumption, after given false information, that my state is not a sealed state. However, I found out yesterday that we are a sealed state. I will not get any records, only a sanitized"background" report authored by the adoption worker. More importantly, the kids will never be able to access their files. When they are older, I will share what I know.

But. They have a right to know what is in that file. So do the hundreds of kids in my state who age out of foster care each year.

It’s incomprehensible to me. Especially for kids who grew up in the system and have no coherent thread through their childhood. What you’re told at 6, 9, 14 is usually a variation of the truth and very confusing.

I think a lot of these state statutes are hold overs from decades past when adoption was secretive. Or am I missing something?

[justbets]

I was thinking about this too! We received NOTHING during or after the adoption. am I allowed to request her medical records for when she was born and her first year? We happened to go to the same pediatrician, so she is still a patient there.

[mariarussell26]

Here we get one copy of the ENTIRE record with VERY SERIOUS COVERSATION that these will never be able to be accessed again so please keep them in a fireproof safe etc because if something happens to them you're out of luck. I have always felt extremely lucky that our state does it this way.

[broughtandborn]

My kids both use the construction “is I’m” instead of “am I” (as in “When is I’m going to start kindergarten?”) and I secretly love it.

[that-girl-erin]

Cora uses “thems” and it’s one of the last sorta baby things about her and I don’t want her to ever stop (“Maya and Mady are brushing thems teeth”).

[squirrels-and-whales]

My kid inverts compound words so “watermelon” becomes “melon water” and it’s great.

[singlefostermomma-deactivated20]

Matt loves balls. It’s his favorite word and toy. Honestly love is probably an understatement. He’s obsessed. So anytime he likes something he’ll shorten/abbreviate the orginial word and add ball. So strawberries becomes “strawballs” or baby become “baballs”. Super confusing, but he’s so fucking earnest when he does it. 😂

[margoglynn]

Toddler says “hungrym” instead of “hungry.” He’s outgrown “machos” for “nachos,” and I’m forever sad.

[nycpinwheel-deactivated20230509]

Lulu picked up ‘mind your own bean’s wax’ from school, so Flavia also picked it up and used it seriously until fairly recently. I loved it too much to correct. 

[mariarussell26]

My kid, instead of saying "I'm not" says

" I amment" which? I adore but also my Irish friend told me they say there all the time so...I'm not sure it counts.

[tvshoowsmoovies]

The cast of The Good Place react to the season one finale plot twist. Recorded by Kristen Bell. (x)

[nervousbanter]

UGH SO GREAT

I love this show

[dxactivatxdusxr]

A group of rough looking boys walked past me today and all I heard of their conversation was “he’s got that anxiety disorder bro so I went with him so he’d be more comfortable” and it made me realise the world isn’t all that bad

[fitzefitcher]

#this is team skull

[its-just-a-phage]

The pet store I worked at had a pen with rabbits near the front door. On every side of the pen were huge signs saying “You can pet me, but don’t pick me up!” One day two absolutely huge guys came in and one immediately reaches into the pen to grab a rabbit. Before i could say anything his friend grabbed his arm and asked him “did you see the sign?” He said “yeah! it says that you can pick them up but don’t pet them!” Then he went quiet for a moment and softly said “I didn’t read it right did I?” And his friend just puts his arm on his shoulder and said “its ok, i know you’ve got that thing where words get mixed up. Let just pet these cute lil shits” And I still haven’t gotten over that interaction.

[yallmightt]

I was walking my dog through Boston bc he likes the likes car rides. He’s a little thing tbh we call him short and long. So this huge scary man with a full beard approaches me like “hey can my buddy and I pet your dog? He gets nervous around dogs but your’s is so small I think it’s a good place to start.” Ofc I was like “yes he’s very friendly!” So this guy brings his equally big friend over and they sit on the floor while this man looks terrified of my tiny dog so big man number one asks “can I pick him up?” And i say yes so he picks him up and puts him on man number two’s lap and man number two is abt to freak out and his friend straight up just goes “hey man, it’s okay just relax I’d never let anything hurt you. He’s a good boy.” I’ll never forget it ever bc I know that man looked at me (5'3 , glasses, probably wearing a sweater vest) and my dog (kinda goofy looking little thing) and was like ‘ah yes the two least intimidating living things I’ve seen in Boston all day he’ll feel relaxed around them’ and went out of his way to help his friend. It makes me so happy

[anotherdayforchaosfay]

My husband had this Dungeons and Dragons group ages ago, and one of the guys was TERRIFIED of cats.  The moment he sees one he freezes up and can barely breathe.  Said guy is almost seven feet tall and solid wall of muscle.  Whenever he came over I’d put the cats in the bedroom and chill out with a book because my cats don’t like being shut away without one of us. 

One of my cats was pawing at the door and meowing loudly, an indication she REALLY needs to use the litter box.  I let her out and decide, hey, I’m hungry, and decide to the kitchen.  I forgot to shut the bedroom door. 

Next thing I hear is the group going completely silent.  My husband very calmly asks me to come over and help him gather our two cats up.  I go over to where the group is and my black cat, Cacoa, is rubbing up against the guy’s leg, purring, and doing her “let me on your lap” meow.  The other cat, Jasper, is sitting at the window, chilling out.  I go over and pick up Cacoa and tell the big dude she’s harmless, loves laps, and would be thrilled if he pet her.  Very slowly he touches my cat’s face, and she leans right into his hand.  He then pets her back and sighs because she’s really soft and purring like mad.  After a few minutes he asks how to pick her up and if it’s okay if she sits on his lap.

He spent the next six hours spoiling my cat.  The next week he showed up with cat treats and toys because he fell in love with the cats.  He told me he was doing some research on house cats, and even talked to a vet about them.  A couple months later he adopted two cats and was as thrilled and excited as a new parent. 

[ruffboi-mags]

Oh no a new one!!!

[jack-the-lion]

Blessed post.

[anaalihelmisimpukka]

I used to work at this stable for icelandic horses and every now and then this man would turn up by the field to just watch the horses. One time I walked by him as I was going to get the horses inside, and he went ”I always wanted to learn how to ride but I’m afraid of horses because they’re so huge. If I could ride ponies like this, maybe I’d dare but now I’m too big and heavy for them.” You should have seen his face when I told them that actually they’re not ponies, just small horses and they could totally carry him. His face just lit up. Next thing I’m helping him to get on back. Today he knows how to ride.

[toujours-fidele-deactivated2018]

omg this is so pure <3

[louilovexx]

take your time to read this, it’s totally worth it

[yupthatexists]

Follow us on Instagram too: https://www.instagram.com/yup.that.exists

[pup-rusty-deactivated20181210]

Can we figure out a way to do this to student loan debt.

[imthehuggernaut]

I would read Ayn Rand to pay down my student loans

[nowyoukno]

[fangirling-so-hard-rn]

Crows are scary They

use tools

Can be taught to speak (like parrots)

Have huge brains for birds

like seriously their brain-to-body size ratio is equal to that of a chimpanzee

They vocalize anger, sadness, or happiness in response to things

they are scary smart at solving puzzles

some crows stay with their mates until one of them dies

they can remember faces

SIDENOTE HERE BECAUSE HOLY SHIT.  They did an experiment where these guys wore masks and some of them fucked with crows.  Pretty soon the crows recognized the masks = douchebag.  But the nice guys with masks they left alone.  THEN, OH WE’RE NOT DONE, NO SIR crows that WEREN’T EVEN IN THE EXPERIMENT AND NEVER SAW THE MASK BEFORE knew about mask-dudes and attacked them on sight.  THEY PASSED ON THE FUCKING INFORMATION TO THEIR CROW BUDDIES.

They remember places where crows were killed by farmers and change their migration patterns.

Guys I’m really scared of crows now. (q) 

[doctormemelordmd]

Yeah but have you seen this 

[stultiloquentia]

A colleague of my dad’s lives next to a lake, and looked out the window one morning to see a duck trapped in the ice. A crow swooped down. “Oh hell,” she thought, expecting carnage, because crows are opportunists. But the crow chipped at the ice with its beak until the duck was free.

[warwyrd-deactivated20170724]

Idk of this counts but a few crows saved me from a magpie swooping attack once ,they’re bros who can tell when magpies are being unreasonable and need to chill

[reallymisscoffee]

I love crows so damn much. When I was fifteen, I hit a pretty serious bout of depression, to the point I was in my room for months. Well, a family of crows made a nest in a tree outside my window. There were two parents and two chicks. One chick was healthy and strong. One was weak, and had a caw like something being strained. It sounded more like a rooster crowing and so my parents jokingly named him ‘Buck’.Well… months passed and Buck’s sibling was taught to fly. His parents focused on the sibling because the sibling was strong. The father stayed behind to try and teach Buck, but I saw him try to fly, fail, and crash to the floor. His father helped him back up into the tree.

Every day, I would watch Buck from my window until one day I opened it and started talking to him. He was small and gangly and he couldn’t caw right. His feathers were all over the place and I felt a kinship. So I made a deal with him. I told him that if he could do it, if he could fly, then I could find the strength to get up. Well… near the end of the season, after talking with him every day, I finally saw him get out of the nest. He went to the edge of his branch, braced himself, and jumped… and just before he hit the ground, he soared back up into the sky. I cheered harder than I ever had before.

That winter, Buck left the area. I was crestfallen. I felt like I’d lost a friend. But I was so damn proud of him. 

Cut to the next spring? I’m walking up the driveway one day when suddenly I hear a sound… a broken caw. I look up, and Buck is sitting in a tree above my head. He stared at me and puffed his feathers, then hopped down in front of me and cawed again. I was so damn thrilled, and I told him how proud I was of him. He ruffled his feathers and then soared off into his old tree. 

That summer? I heard two broken caws. One from Buck… and one from his chick.

Cut to ten years later? We have a family of crows who all have a very distinct caw and they come here and spend every spring, summer, and fall on our property. Buck still greets me every spring.

[ruggie-bucchis]

that last reply made me wanna cry. that’s so beautiful.

[avianawareness]

Don’t forget the Russian Crow SLEDDING DOWN A ROOF not once, but twice. 

[odpixel]

this one morning i kept hearing really loud caws, i remember it was like 5am, LIKE REALLY LOUD AND ANNOYING AND AGGRESSIVE, so loud that i could hear it through a closed window, and i eventually went outside to check it out. there was a crow on my front lawn, it had an injury on its head and couldn’t fly and there were two other crows circling right above it, and they were cawing like mad. 

i tried to get close and take a better look and one of them dived super low and tried to attack me. so i went back in the house and chopped some sliced raw meat and tossed it at him from a distance.

a few more times later, very soon after, they could tell i was trying to help, and did not attack me. i was “allowed” to walk up close and pick him up, he couldn’t drink water properly so i had to dip my finger in a bowl and stick it in his mouth.

i did this few times a day and it went on for about a week before he disappeared, i thought he recovered and left, but he came back the next day and lands on me, and i see him around the block quite often, and he would come sit on my shoulder for a few minutes and then fly away again. i feel like i’ve adopted a son.

[lilith-knight]

Best birbs !!

[221cbakerstreet]

your son is Beautiful and Strong

[solitarelee]

every time I see this post it has different crow stories and every time I reblog it again because all crow stories are good stories

[betheothergirl-deactivated20180]

Like, I wouldn’t want to be on bad terms with a crow, but they are a really smart animal, they aren’t scary You just want to be nice to them because they will know and they will remember, and they will pay you back if you treat them a certain way.

As a side note, I volunteered at a rehab (Hope for Wildlife), where they were rehabbing a crow with a broken wing–who was named Russell Crow. He kept pulling his bandage off so a sleeve was cut off some old clothing and put on him like a little sweater. 

[blackwoolncrown]

!!!!

[birbiebabies]

I don’t think I’ll ever not reblog this. This posts makes me cry and smile at the same time.

[johnnyrico]

@jewishmagpie

[misunderstood-ocs-deactivated20]

CROWS ARE AMAZING @thefingerfuckingfemalefury

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

THEY ARE GOOD BIRBS :D

[the-nerdy-daydreamer]

As much as I enjoy “Planet of the Apes” I’d bet anything that if the Apes didn’t make it, the crows would evolve to take over right after them.

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

A Planet of the Crows would be a utopia <3

[jabberwock-jabberwock]

They’re good birds Brent

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

BEST BIRBS

[dovewithscales]

Can’t not reblog. 

[verndariulfur-deactivated201801]

I think that crows might have inadvertently become my favorite avian. Bless this post

[darkersolstice]

@builtfjordtuff

[rotten-rodentia]

I love crows

[interstellactic-studios-random]

People ask me why my fav birb is crow, proceeds to show them this post

[haiku-robot]

people ask me why my fav birb is crow proceeds to show them this post

^Haiku^bot^8. I detect haikus with 5-7-5 format. Sometimes I make mistakes. Help keep my meatbag slave alive. Contact: [email protected] | HAIKU BOT NO | Good bot! | Beep-boop!

[spiritualcuriosities]

Also in the experiment about the mask dudes, they came back 7 YEARS LATER, and crows who had been tagged as chicks still in the nest, remembered them and attacked them.

They have been known to calculate from how high to drop a nuts on asphalt, in order to crack open the shell but not shatter the nut inside.

Often when a crow dies, they will gather in a large group nearby, and stay there silently for a few moments before all flying away. Like a wake of sorts

[redmetalwitch]

I haven’t read all this but I had to save it

[mariarussell26]

Crows are best birds.

[random2908]

Saw this shared on FB. It covers counter-arguments for a lot of the most common pro-gun points you’ll see people raise. Long read, but very helpful.

[jazzybot4]

This is amazing. Thank you dude for doing all this work.

[anexperimentallife]

Cosigned (by a fellow veteran)

[rionsuke]

The last thing you ate + the first thing you see when you look to your left is the title of your pretentious lifestyle blog.

Right now, mine would be called Pizza and Prints.

[tonkdempsonk-deactivated2020081]

Reese’s Pieces and Hats

[frankensteindotpdf]

Ice Cream amd Pillows

[radicallyred-deactivated2018041]

Carmel Corn and Blankets

[agent-jaselin]

Thunder from down under Cat…

[solitarelee]

Kimchi and Darkness

[thehornedwitch-deactivated20211]

Tea and Cauldrons. Y E S.

[inactive-platypus]

Rustic apple tarts and chairs.

[saiyanshredder]

steak dog

[staticdream1-blog]

Ass Bag

[girlbossjodiarias]

Instant Soup and Pens

[acmesalesrep]

Conversation Hearts and Cubicle Walls

[alfa-lima-limon]

Cold brew coffee and windows. Seems legit.

[kibblesandbitch]

Fat Bomb & Files

[tap-shoes]

Chinese Takeout and Chinese Takeout Menus. 

[missandryifyourenasty]

Cold brew and calculators. I dig it.

[thsoftestsound]

Raspberry Fage & Marimekko Pillows

[acakewalkofcrocodiles]

^^^^^^ bitch!!!! I’m poppyseed muffin and Marimekko pillows!!!

[lovelymissjenna]

Whey protein coffee shake and infinity scarfs

[havekidslaughmore]

Cole Slaw Waiting Room. I would name a blog that.

[mariarussell26]

Falafel Daughter

[whatsdifferentincanada]

[writer-and-thrasher]

I HAVE NEVER HIT THE REBLOG BUTTON SO FAST

[ciaonotes-deactivated20171023]

i’m curious.

put your mbti type, hogwarts house, and what you’re majoring in/plan on majoring in in the tags

[bujnik]

INTJ, Slytherin, started out in American lit but ended up in education.

[broughtandborn]

ENFP, Hufflepuff, majored in English and minored in education and French.

[mariarussell26]

INFP, Gryffindor, Education.

[acautionarytale]

I mean, I’m not opposed

[salemcigarettes]

Dow Joans….

[mstgkitten]

This is a man who claims to be fiscally savvy. … … … ugh…

Can we load the cannon now mr. president?

[golbatgender]

We have to steal it from Elon Musk first bc NASA doesn’t have enough funding to do it

[mariarussell26]

While this *could* be something he said, it's not. It was created as a joke and the author was shittig himself thinking he'd get in trouble because people were retweeting it like it was real. PS. Trump is the actual worst.

[p0dunkpunk]

For those of you who don’t know, I work at an anarchist co-op coffee shop.

Apparently, all the Chicano/Cholo boys in my neighborhood have caught on the the fact that I sneak food and stuff to all the little punk kids and homeless kids at the coffee shop.

There are three in particular who call me Mom. Not Mami, not Ma, Mom. The rest refer to me as “Miss”.

They’ve decided to always have one of the three of them there with me on my night shifts. (Especially after they witnessed the last bad shift where I had to kick a bunch of tweakers out. Said tweakers lit my fucking bulletin board on fire.)

Tonight, one of the boys actually charged up a crackhead who wouldn’t get out when I told him to leave.

About an hour later, I was emptying bus tubs when that same lovely boy walked in and wetted a wash rag. I asked what he was doing and he told me not to worry. So, I went about my business, doing dishes, bussing the main dining tables, etc.

I’d left a broom in the smoking room and a fresh trash bag in the bathroom for once I was done with the dishes.

When I walked out, everything was spotless and the trash had been replaced. He’d wiped all my tables, swept, mopped, and emptied all the ash trays.

He’d also picked the lock on the bathroom so his friend could take out the trash for me. (Which I’m not sure whether I should scold him for. Haha)

They snuck around and did my closing shift duties to thank me for keeping them warm and fed.

I’m fucking crying.

[odetodickhead]

Catch me fuckin’ BAWLING

I work at a skating rink sometimes (well, it’s all volunteer but w/e) and I do the same thing food-wise. About 15 minutes to closing, I’ll take all the leftover food and go around the neighborhood, giving it out to the homeless, the streetrats, the punks. We’ve got quite a crowd. 

There’s a girl that’s about my age and her little brother that are living on the streets, the kid’s gotta be about 8. They now come into the rink to help close up.

I wasn’t expecting anyone (It was maybe a half-hour till close and I was the only one left inside besides the owner, who was out closing the rink) and I hear a little crash behind me. I turn around from cleaning out the hot dog tray and there they are - The girl and her little brother. They’d picked the lock on the supply cabinet and started cleaning the tables and sweeping while I was in the kitchen.

They did the same thing. Just because someone’s homeless/ a streetrat/ a punk doesn’t mean they’re bad people.

[mariarussell26]