Just a monkey, hammering out words one at a time

[guinevereslancelot]

in the next batman movie selina is back in town to con bruce wayne which he knows but he missed her so much and obviously he can afford it so he just lets her

[guinevereslancelot]

she reveals she's robbed him and he's like oh that's fine lol if you needed money you could have just asked :) and writes her a check for a million dollars and asks when he can see her again and she's like dang this guy is insane??

[guinevereslancelot]

he was terrified she could never love him for bruce wayne meanwhile selina's like okay edgy badboys are OUT rich himbos are IN but its the same guy

[guinevereslancelot]

she expects batman to try to stop her at some point but he never does so she concludes that he just really hates bruce wayne for some reason which makes him all the more attractive

[guinevereslancelot]

batman realizes she's falling for bruce for real and he's not even jealous he's just like "you really like him? 🥺 that's great 🥺" and selina's like wtf

[guinevereslancelot]

anyway she sneaks into bruce's study or whatever to crack the safe hidden behind the painting and it's full of roses, jewelry, bruce's blank checkbook and a little note asking her to dinner. he thinks that this is normal behavior btw

[whispy-witch]

he has never had a girlfriend in his life <3 selina can't decide if he's stupid or brilliant but he IS cute she was determined to hate him but he's actually really sweet and it drives her insane bc she likes him against her will suddenly she is pissed at batman for apparently hating him anyway i am rotating them in my mind <3 bruce is like this is great. i am getting a good grade in dating something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve and selina is like this guy is insane. i want to rob him. i want to study him like a bug. i want to kiss him in the moonlight

why would you hide that in the tags op

[alagaisia]

Hey. Why isn’t the moon landing a national holiday in the US. Isn’t that fucked up? Does anyone else think that’s absurd?

[alagaisia]

It was a huge milestone of scientific and technological advancement. (Plus, at the time, politically significant). Humanity went to space! We set foot on a celestial body that was not earth for the first time in human history! That’s a big deal! I’ve never thought about it before but now that I have, it’s ridiculous to me that that’s not part of our everyday lives and the public consciousness anymore. Why don’t we have a public holiday and a family barbecue about it. Why have I never seen the original broadcast of the moon landing? It should be all over the news every year!

[alagaisia]

It’s July 20th. That’s the day of the moon landing. Next year is going to be the 54th anniversary. I’m ordering astronaut shaped cookie cutters on Etsy and I’m going to have a goddamn potluck. You’re all invited.

[watermelon-converse]

Hey. Hey. Tumblr. Ides of March ppl. We can do this

[emi--rose]

Hell yeah moon holiday

[hello-delicious-tea]

Ooh coming up we should celebrate

[ariaste]

PITCH: We call it Moon Day, and then every 7 years when it falls on a Monday, that's an even BIGGER deal and we call that Moon Day Monday and go absolutely apeshit about it (the next Moon Day Monday is in 2026 so we have a couple trial runs first)

[sarostheghostcat]

MOON DAY MOON DAY MOON DAY

[wafflebloggies]

moon day is 20th July!!!

[silly-jellyghoty]

Scheduling this a day earlier to remind you all and myself about the Moon Day tomorow!

[sashaforthewin]

Happy moon day to all who celebrate

[kitsuneofthemist]

This is your reminder to prep for Moon Day on July 20th.

[truly-celrc]

few more catdrw's

[psychotic-gerard]

x

[kiragecko]

[Image of text saying,

Some AAVE speakers pluralize 'child' as 'childrens'. People get racist about this ("It's already plural!"), but 'children' actually comes from Middle English speakers doing the same thing: slapping their plural marker on word already pluralized by an extinct plural marker.

To oversimplify: in Old English, 'childer' ('ċildra') was the plural of 'child' ('ċild'). Middle English developed an '-en' plural marker, which we see in 'oxen'. Instead of updating to 'childen', people slapped their preferred '-en' onto the end of 'childer' - so now we have 'child-er-en'. AAVE carries on this tradition with 'child-er-en-s'.

"Pure" language is just impurity obscured by the passage of time.

End ID.]

[robomythos]

I said I was gonna doodle them in the pillow pile so I did 

I have a thing with blue and orange I don’t know why

[werewolf-transgenderism]

irritating as fuck when people get mad at Black people existing in premodern historical fiction/fantasy media. like first of all, you're racist. and second of all, you are acting as though Black people didn't exist in premodern Europe which is simply false. especially when we're talking about the Mediterranean, like what the fuck do you people think is along the southern half of the Mediterranean Ocean?? everyone's on boats, there are GOING to be interactions with Black people in Northern Africa, and there are GOING to be Black people in Mediterranean Europe. stop being stupid. your imagined homogeneous white European past is not historical reality, get over it you massive losers

[pocket-deer-belly]

at some point in being autistic it becomes really clear that everyone wants you to come up with solutions to problems you've never been helped with

[pocket-deer-belly]

i don't know how to fix our communicative problems, you're the source of it and it's exhausting to be treated as irrational for not responding correctly to small talk, do you think you could help a disabled bitch out and not put the onus of solving the problem on me, the one who is constantly excluded and treated as a freak

[pocket-deer-belly]

and then when you point this out they're like "but we literally put up with you, could you do something for us please?" and it's like. you put up with me?

[feldfrog]

If a fantasy world has an ancient tree of wisdom, that means it must also have young trees that are dumb as shit. Just giving terrible advice like, "the evil wizard is kinda hot"'

[evilwizard]

okay. rude.

[bunjywunjy]

Question! Do cats think us petting them is a type of grooming?

it IS a type of grooming! petting cats and other mammals smooths out their fur, removes shed hairs, and helps evenly spread natural skin oils throughout the fur to keep it healthy!

it probably feels just so so nice, also :)

[funnytwittertweets]

[makaeru]

Related: at a neuroscience conference I was at once there was a talk on how the "microslippages" against your fingertip when you lightly pinch something are generally enough for you to work out exactly how much force to grip it with to lift it without crushing it or dropping it.

[trasno-personal]

[ID/A tweet by Cliff 🦖 [dinosaur emoji] Jerrison (@ pervocracy) saying "one of the most amazing things a human brain can do is when you shake an opaque bottle and get an idea of how full it is by how the weight shifts. there's got to be incredible math going on under the hood there" /End ID]

[broken-horn-of-equius]

What about tosses? What about catching? THATS some serious math right there too

[un-interactive-introvert]

Theres a post somewhere about how the human brain is just constantly doing advanced calculus, even if we dont understand the math, we are still very good at consepsualizing it

[kaviiinsky]

LOVING PHYSICS HOURS!!!

[the-composite-doll]

So storytime from retail

So a common sale was Arizona Iced Teas in cans, 2 for a dollar. People would buy literal *cases* of their favorite flavor.

Once I was ringing up the cans for someone, who had like six. The cans were green.

I was a bit distracted ringing and putting cans in bags, engaging properly.

Grabbed a similarly sized and colored can of pringles. Brain did not register. Hand just went high up because Pringles weigh nothing compared to Arizona can

We all laughed but science tumblr what math error happened??? What was the error message in the brain?

[xaira-gabvi]

That's because the brain is an optimization machine.

Let's say you pick up 30 Arizona cans a day. Every single time you pick one up, your brain quickly evaluates how much force is needed based on the weight. That's a lot of calculations tho, and nature always wants to conserve energy. So, the brain creates a procedure. Now instead of having to do that mental gymnastic every time, you just use the premade procedure. The action becomes muscle memory. It's just done automatically. It becomes a reflex.

And there's a reason we call it muscle memory. Because once the action becomes familiar enough, your brain is no longer needed. Your body knows what to do.

So when you touch the can of Pringles, two things happen. First, your body does what it's used to. It applies the amount of force you'd need to lift the Arizona can. Then, the tactile info reaches your brain and gets processed. It tries to correct the mistake you made, but it's too late.

Tldr: your brain is an overworked manager. It hates simple, repetitive tasks. That's the body's job. And when the body fucks up the brain can be a bit slow to react.

Also, our fine motor skills are off the charts. A huuuuge part of our brain is dedicated to handling tools. I can't think of another animal that relies so heavily on dexterity. Maybe spiders?

[alexanderwales]

It's absolutely crazy that intellectual labor can wipe you out. It seems like it shouldn't be a thing, like your stores of brain juice shouldn't be able to be depleted in that way.

I feel like a wizard that's out of spell slots, and to me that's a hackish mechanical limitation put in place to try to balance the classes.

[stealingpotatoes]

coping mechanism <3

[im-a-goat-in-disguise]

Did you know? Tumblr DOES have a post length limit. Strangely, though, it's based on how many blocks of text you have. Supposedly this implies that you can have any length post so long as it's one block of text? Very strange, will have to investigate further.

[im-a-goat-in-disguise]

Two limits! You can have a maximum of 4,096,000 characters in 1 [one] tumblr post. I would work out how many combinations this is, but 26^6,000 is already considered to be "Infinity" by most calculators, and a program I wrote threw an error code.

26^95,000 is already over 134,000 characters long - which would take 33 different text blocks to convey via tumblr. Whenever somebody says we're running out of posts, don't forget that tumblr is needlessly designed for MASSIVE amounts of information [no matter how detrimental it may be for mobile phones].

There are SOME works of fanfiction which are lengthy enough that you couldn't fit the whole thing into one tumblr post, but this is enough to fit Hitchikers Guide To The Galaxy in it about 14 times over.

[im-a-goat-in-disguise]

Don't hide that in the tags

[thewolfofthestars]

The Lord of the Rings is generally my go-to measuring stick for "long-ass pieces of text", so I must additionally point out that, if written out optimally, about 2 full Lord of the Ringses would fit into one Tumblr post, apparently.

Though I'm not certain if that character count includes spaces, unfortunately, as I got that figure by googling "how many letters are in lord of the rings" and came upon a TikTok that counted the number of letter characters in LotR in order to figure out how many Spaghettios cans would be needed to re-write the entire thing, if one were to cut and paste each individual letter from the cans blackmail-letter style.

For those curious, the numbers are 2,261,081 letters in LotR, which calculates out to 8,795 cans of Spaghettios needed, which would cost about $12,225.

What a way to start my day. The internet truly is a beautiful place.

[jv]

Hey! Guy who programmed most of the core pieces of the editor here!

So, those are the theoretical limits, yeah. But in practice, the editor is not even close to be optimized to handle these kinds of huge posts: there is a point, far far away from the size of the lord of the rings, that your browser would just crash.

So if you are planning to post long fanfiction, or anything, you better work on something that's optimized for long form (locally, or some alternative to Google docs) and then post in chunks.

So no, Tumblr is not designed to support these massive posts. It's theoretically possible, but that never was a real scenario we were trying to support

[sztupy]

Editor crashes? No problem, I'm sure you can do that through the API though

[jv]

I'm honestly very curious of what it would happen if someone tries something like using the API to post the entire Lord Of The Rings. I would assume the request would timeout, but it would be a cool test to run. Anyway, if it works, anyone trying to reblog that post would just insta-kill their browser :D

[sztupy]

IT WORKED!

Post by @full-lotr-test

💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 0 · J. R. R. Tolkien — The Lord Of The Rings. (1/4) ----------------------------------------------- THE LORD OF THE RINGS by J.

(okay this is just the first book, let me see if I can do all three)

[jv]

oh yeah, almost a million characters, 365 text blocks, and the editor is handling it pretty well

Honestly, it works way better than I expected! I guess being plain text and not having to render any fancy formatting is enough for a modern browser to handle it well. Reblogging it took a few more seconds than usual, but went through too. Good job tumblr!

[sztupy]

Here's the entire one, all 3 books + appendices:

Post by @full-lotr-test

💬 0  🔁 0  ❤️ 0 · J. R. R. Tolkien — The Lord Of The Rings. (1/4) ----------------------------------------------- THE LORD OF THE RINGS by J.

The API did return a 500 when trying to upload BUT it actually did upload

[willcodehtmlforfood]

.

[yapping-migrant]

opening @full-lotr-test makes the app crash, I need to check on PC 👀

[jv]

I just tested on my Android phone and it froze the app for about 30 seconds, but when I thought it was going to finally crash, it actually loaded the blog and started working normally

[jv]

Btw, @sztupy, have you tried to edit the post? Does it work??

[sztupy]

Yes, someone asked me to add a tag so they can filter it out, and I tried that over from the web interface.

For the first post (first book only) there was no issue. Edit loaded, I could add the tag, press Save and done. Note: this was on a PC using Chrome

For the second post (all three books) it worked the same way as the API. I could load up the page and edit it, but when pressing save I'd get an error message. However the edit did go through actually and the tag is now there.

Haven't tried to edit the text itself, but don't think it would make a difference - if your browser can load it'd just work.

(On mobile on a low/mid-range Android the App could open up the post without problems, but haven't tried editing. Using a mobile browser - Firefox in my case - the page could load but it was super slow, and buggy, and it also did crash once)

Also as a public service announcement: if you want to filter the post out from your dash the tag is #full-lotr-test

Also if anyone is interested I loaded up the entire LOTR trilogy in TXT file, then wrote a code that split it out into NPF (Neue Post Format, you know the new PDF or whatever) blocks of at most 4000 characters, then simply called the Create Post API with the resulting NPF block. I believe there's around 900 blocks in the second post above, each block containing somewhere between 3000-4000 characters, so close to the theoretical limit

[jv]

That's interesting, opening it in the editor means that you don't only have the rendered html version, but also the JSON object containing all the blocks. I would expect it to at least stutter a little.

I tested it again from the android app, and scrolling through the post is really painful: it freezes the app for a few seconds every time you scroll an entire screen... So yeah, I think it would take hours to scroll through the entire thing . So anyone reblogging it is probably earning an unfollow from their beloved mutuals if they want to be able to use Tumblr at all that day 😁

[headspace-hotel]

Spell of "makes all your followers unfollow you"

surprisingly functional web site

[truly-celrc]

PLEASE be more careful, Rewind! 😵‍💫

if not for your own sake then at least for your concerned husband's. if not for him then at least for your assigned doctor who is already busy enough without you-

[millenniallust4death]

I’m paying to force seven thousand strangers to see a photo of my late husband having fun with his dog. Tumblr Blaze is totally worth it. XD

[millenniallust4death]

Thank-you to all of my new Internet stranger friends for being so gracious about having my post shoved onto your dashboards. I loved reading all of your kind tags and comments! Both Martin and Bosco have been gone for several years now but for 24 hours, they felt very present in my life. I greatly appreciate this gift. ❤️

[psycorax]

Reblog to have your dashboard be visited by the spirit of joy that death can end but not erase.

[leavescrown]

Love that this is well beyond 7000 people now and still going

[millenniallust4death]

@leavescrown Exactly! It’s a beautiful gift. Martin and Bosco out there travelling around the Tumblr community, continually making new friends.

[millenniallust4death]

@sseanettles

#hello again martin and bosco!! sending you boys round for another go :)

Reading your tag made me laugh out loud. It’s like two old friends unexpectedly stopped by your porch for a quick visit. XD

[petermorwood]

I’ll always reblog Martin and Bosco when they splash across my dash, because of Reasons.

What’s loved, lives.

[randomishnickname]

One of those fandom things that I love is when there’s new characters around and, with the unwavering confidence of an old farmer appraising cattle, fanfic authors take one good look at them, tilt their imaginary hat, and go “Aye. Praise kink, that one. Mighty case of praise kink if I ever saw one.” And everyone else just “aye.”

[inimitably-ineffable]

Not to mention the plot tropes.

“I don’t think the Highschool AU is going to come in too strong this year. Fandoms a touch jaded for that. But the hurt/comfort is growin’ thick as weeds and twice as fast. It’ll be a good harvest, fer sure.”

[mx-incognito]

@cynaram

[cynaram]

“I hear over at [neighbouring fandom] they’re putting the top field into fix-it fics.”

“Yes, ‘twould be.  They had a hard season last year, a right hard season.” 

[explorerrowan]

“You think I ought to plant a little Sailor Moon Wild West AU? Don’t know if anything would come of it. Might not make it to harvest.”

“Won’t know until you plant it, will you?”

[fieldbears]

“Ah, a heritage crop.”

[captainclickycat]

The shipping forecast.

[romanticalgirl]

The Fandom Almanac

[nyansense-the-nyanbinary]

“I think I’m going to sow some rarepairs this season. Don’t know what the market for ‘em will be, but I can eat ‘em if nobody else wants to.”

[jonairadreaming]

Petition to start referring to fanworks as ‘produce’ and stop calling it ‘content’.

Produce = Fresh. Tasty. Nutritious. Contains some ppm of Love.

Content = Lifeless. Sterile. An obligation.

[stephanisoejono]

happy new year -------------_--------------------

[calamity-aims]