Danny has found himself as a cat. And there’s good news and bad news about it. The good news is that he’s a magical cat or something similar, seeing as he has two tails and can go Very Big if he wants to. Bad news? He’s pretty sure they’re in a different dimension now.
Cute news, both Ellie and Jordan are itty bitty kittens and utterly adorable, he would murder for them. They’re so tiny! Like, yeah they got physically de-aged before all this so they could properly pass as his kids- along with part of Dan’s parole- but this? He could hold them in his hands if he still had them!
Alright! First things first, find a shelter and avoid the destroyed buildings along with whatever destroyed them in the first place. Then he could figure out if this is an accident or some sort of forced vacation. But shelter first.
Before I read the tags my mind immediately went Aristocats, the fact that they are nekomata(had to look it up, those are cat yokai) makes it even better. Danny can still be Duchess just magical and Ellie and Jordan(Dan) are his kittens and if they are loss in Gotham Jason can be turned into a nekomata to somehow and be Thomas O’Malley.
The batfam is freaking out because Jason/redhood (was he in costume when it happened?) just disappeared but he's just living out a star-crossed lovers forbidden romance (if danny is considered a prince or even just 'off limits' due to his relation to Clockwork and jason being from the streets(alley)) and loving every moment of it
Danny, Jason, Dan and Ellie can all at least understand each other. No one else can understand them. But they do have at least each other to talk to. Which is how their budding romance begins. Jason is wandering through his haunt and hears Dan yell for Danny. Ellie got stuck in a trap. Jason of course expects human children. Not other Nekomata's. But he's still gonna help. Danny and Jason manage to free Ellie. Which leads to Danny being grateful. They swap tales. And oh! You were human before this too? Yeah, no idea either. Wanna stick together to figure it out?
Now, my guess for how this happened? Ghostly guardians matchmaking. Clockwork and Lady Gotham gossip together a lot. They are friends. Both have a favoured/adopted halfa. You don't think? We could try it right? So they plot and scheme. And Bam! Four Halfa Nekomata. If they don't fall for each other in a set amount of time? The spell will wear off. If they do? It keeps going until they confess dammit!
i LOVE it when Clockwork and other spirits (mainly Lady Gotham) play matchmaker because you KNOW theyre also gonna play interference
If Jason comes up with the idea of (ugh) asking for help (you know after the initial thoughts of 'no one can see him like this' then CW and Gotham are doing everything in their power to make sure they miss the Bats or are just cut off entirely)
Gotham is already a big place and now while theyre all cats? That place is gonna feel huge.
(Unfortunately it seems danny, dan and ellie cant fly anymore. they can still float tho not for long it seems but atleast they can still go thru walls (Danny will ignore the fireball that Dan let out when he sneezed on account of the sneeze being adorable™️) )
Luckily, Jason grew up on these streets. Even as a magic cat, he'll know how to get around.. In fact? it feels EASIER to get around? Danny and the kittens just have to stick close to him.
Oh they cant just get to the Bats to get help? Well it seems they have time. Jason takes Danny sightseeing. The Parks, A nice pet groomer place that "the demon brat mentioned" ,
"i just wish there wasnt so much smog. i kinda miss the stars"
"We could go to the observatory"
"There's an observatory!? Fuck yeah!!"
kitten dan + ellie: "Fuck" >:)
Meanwhile people have been posting picture and videos online of this "adorable little family of cats" that have been seen all around gotham
(If only the bats werent so preoccupied with hunting down looking for jason. they couldve seen these cute pictures. Damian wouldve liked them)
Once Jason learns the others can phase? He takes them to his latest, not found by his family yet, safe house. It has food. Shelter. A warm bed. Safe water. Since they can also shift to be bigger? It's even easier to get into the cupboards to get food. Seeing the kittens bounce joyfully on the bed? Is adorable. Jason and Danny are loving how happy the kids are.
Now they have a safe place to go back to? Time to go on day trips. Where do you want to see kits? Jason has no idea, but being a good guardian to Jordan and Ellie? Is making Danny feel all giddy. Danny might just be falling for the bad boy with a heart of gold. He's good with his babies! How could he not! Look how happy he made the kittwens!
Jason falls when he watched Danny take out a group of thugs who threatened the Alley kids. Danny was so elegant and precise. Just amazing! He's in love. Doesn't hurt that the kids are walking him through finding his element. Nekomata often have elemental powers. Jordan has fire. Danny and Ellie both use ice. When Jason managed to spit a fire ball? He was so excited. He could breathe fire!
The happy giggles of the kids? And the soft, proud smile Danny sent his way? Made him tumble face first into a wall. Oh. Oh, he wants to keep them. He wants them to be his family. He wants Danny and his kids for the rest of his life. Damn. Best start get to wooing then. Probably best to ask the kittens. Get their permission to court their Mom, all proper like.
The Adventures of Real Life Magic Aristocats becomes quite popular in Gotham, people posting pictures and videos and even setting up a few dates for them. They now have their own tag #AristocatsSightings is the most searched tag in Gotham for a moment.
Somehow someone managed to take pictures of the observatory date and now most people in Gotham are quite determined to be the best wingmen to these two cats. Like have you seen the black one look at the white one with this absolutely smitten look as the other was excitingly exploring the observatory? Yeah they're wingmaning for a cat. Fuck you.
Gotham loves them even more when they spot the cats utterly destroying a gang trying to traffic kids. They have NO idea HOW the cats found out. Frankly no one cares. It was amazing to watch the four of them working together to take them out. It's adorable how utterly each kitten takes after a parent each! Gothamites are currently amused that the Bats haven't noticed the cats yet. Usually Batman would have adopted crime fighting animals to act as animal support by now. Stabby Robin definitely would. They've seen some of his vigilante support animals ok. The bat dragon thing? Fucking terrifying. So yeah, highly amused. Also, VERY willing to help the cats go on a date before they are inevitably captured and moved to Batman's lair.
Jason has managed to get Jordan and Ellie on side! They approve of him! He's allowed to court their Mom! Actually, not just accidentally. He's VERY excited. They even helped him plan. Jason has also noticed that many of the Alley residents? Are definitely helping him woo Danny. Which is hilarious and cute and a bit weird. But this IS Gotham. So, it's not that unusual. Now, Jason? Managed to sneak into a local eatery. The chef seemed oddly thrilled to be meeting him. Muttered something about Disney dreams coming true?? But he will take it! Guy cooked up a full meal. For the four of them. Cut up the beef and fried it up nicely. Added some greens. Poured on a thick creamy sauce. Jason has good food to provide! Proving that even as a cat he can provide properly! The chef seemed highly amused when Jason dropped a 100 dollar bill. Jason wasn't gonna make the man suffer a loss! He ain't an asshole!
Jason, with the 'help' of Jordan and Ellie? He managed to set up the front room. Danny was having a nap while he watched the kids. Dan even taught him how to safely light a candle with his fire breath! So, the kittens got their food on a mini version of the set-up for Jason and Danny. It was very cute. Sure it wasn't the fanciest. But he was lacking in hands. Thumbs were probably the part of his human form he missed the most. Being a nekomata wasn't that bad, except for that. Nope! Not the time for mopey thoughts. Time to go wake Danny up. And start flirting. With purpose. Gosh, he was cute sleeping like that. Jason lightly nudged Danny to wake him up. He just knew he would have THE dopiest look on his face right now. Especially when Danny pouted up at him for the disturbance.
Jason: C'mon! I convinced a local chef to make us real food!
Danny:... You win this round mister. With your cunning ways.
Oh you know the chef is gonna brag about it. Has pictures of Jason carrying the food in makeshifts bag like horses do. Has pictures of Jason carefully picking what he wants for them ! He gets thrice as many clients as usual everyday after this! Business is going strong, this cat can come back anytime ! Not only did he realize a Disney dream but the cat also paid him with a hefty tip !
Street kids even helped gather things to decorate for a romantic dinner and they would 100% be spying if they could.
Dan and Ellie ? Discreetly trying to take pictures, it's not easy but they're trying, they know their aunts and uncle will want to see it.
Now how long is this going to carry on without Damian learning about them? Probably not that long but he doesn't have any reason to link the family nekomatas to his missing brother.
Damian is asked about his feelings on the Nekomata family in an interview. Since he is known for often ignoring social media they do allow him to watch clips. Damian is vibrating in excitement. He wants to meet them!! They are so fluffy! Father! You have to let him try to befriend them!! Look at them! Oh the kittens are so small!!!! The interviewer is chuckling at how excited he is. Happily begins to show a best of reel.
A great ending for this would be a family outing to a park. Danny and Jason are happily watching the kids play. And Danny just realises that Jason? Is someone he wants to keep. He wants him to be in his life forever. Wants to date him. Make him part of the family. Have him as the kids Dad. So a random citizen watches, probably recording them. Danny tucks his head under Jason's chin and gives him the cat headbutt of love.
Danny: Even if we never get back to being human. Could we, be together? Would you be the kids Dad?
Jason is of course ecstatic. Yes! Yes that's what he wants! His courting has worked! He rubs his cheek along Danny fondly.
Jason: I'd love that. I adore you and the kids!
The two snuggle, and are suddenly glowing. Then they begin to shift back into human form. Which of course ends with Danny sprawled over Jason's lap. Bright red. The kids tumble over their feet. No longer used to human form. Danny and Jason scramble towards them. Both off balance. Laughing and giddy. What the fuck!?! Really?!?
Danny: Oh my babies! Are you ok? Did the fall hurt?!
Ellie: We're ok Mom! How did we turn back?!?
Jason: You're Mom agreed to date me?
Dan: Wait! Wait! We got turned into cats as some sort of blind date!?!? What the hell!!!!
All four of them are laughing and wobbly. How do you even walk without a tail? Ellie scrunched her nose. This is weird!!!! Suddenly she's a kitten again. Dan focuses too and is also a kitten.
Not really. Gotham was all about the cat family. The rest of the world was focusing on their usual issues. And Klarion had been busy trying to figure out why Red Robin was ignoring him! Where is he?!? Give him his chew you back!!
With their return to human form being filmed? I think Damian would be the first to find out. He has been trying to find them to make friends. He is going to be devastated that one of them was Todd. Give him back his affection! Father! Todd was turned into a magical cat! Call him! He's human again now!
Bruce: How do you know that?
Damian shows him the video. They see Jason and a young man the same age turn back into humans. Looking very surprised but pleased. See the two children turn back. Then be able to access the form again as they please. The video fades out with them trying to relearn to walk on two legs. Well, now not being able to find Jason makes a lot more sense.
---
Jason and Danny get back to the safe house and are just staring at each other. They are grinning widely. Jason tugs Danny's hair softly.
Jason: Y'know? I expected your hair to be blonde?
Danny: I mean. My Nekomata form took my ghost forms colours. Same with these two kittens.
Jason: Huh. Fair enough. I get to see your ghost form?
Danny: Hmm. Later. I want to cuddle first! And let my babies! Look how tiny they are! So cute!!
Jason: Right?! They helped me plan out courting you.
Danny: Really! Oh good, that means you have their approval! Given how we turned back? I think I know who caused this. If I don't get a green sticky note saying otherwise? It was definitely my Clockpa.
Jason: That's your ghost dad right? Wonder why he chose me?
Danny: Well, we can always ask! You did say you've died before. Maybe you have a ghost parent. If you can't remember what happened when you were dead?
Jason: Huh. Fair. One sec. I'm gonna see if my phone is still in my pocket.
Jason searches his jacket. Yup, that's his phone. Still somehow charged. Huh, whatever caused this out it in suspended animation or something. Weird. Ooft. That's a lot of messages. Annnd, that's B calling. Urgh. Fuck it.
Jason: Love? B has sent, hundreds of messages. You and the kittens ok if I call him?
Danny: Of course! We can even say hi if you do a video call!
Jason: Sneaky. Let's do it. Introduce him to you and the kids yeah?
Damian is convinced that the Kittens are Jason’s bio kids due to their size being that of a kitten under C weeks old ie less than the amount of time Jason has been missing.
Damian has decided he is going to be the best cat uncle ever.
That video is online, right? Does anyone recognize them or do the think that the magic cats’ love for each other caused them to spontaneously gain the ability to transform into humans?
Are people excited? Angry? Confused?
I’m hoping this is before Jason was legally back to life and shortly after Danny + kids moved to Gotham that way there isn’t really anyone to recognize them other than their family and Gotham just accepts they have a Magic Cat Family now.
Also side note: Damian is gonna have to fight Selina for title of best Cat Aunt/Uncle/Relative
It has to be before Jason declared himself legally alive again so the public just doesnt know it's him. The public are going CRAZY thinking the cats loved eachother so much they transformed into humans. "Look at that thats TRUE love right there" and then going "oh shit do they need a place to stay?" whole RANGE of EMOTION
(plus it would be funnier if the public began to be like JASON TODD-WAYNE WAS REINCARNATED INTO A MAGIC CAT?!?! THEN BECAME HUMAN AGAIN!!! GUYS WE BROUGHT BRUCE WAYNES SON BACK TO HIM!!)
Meanwhile the bats are freaking tf out because in the weeks Jason's been gone he apparently fathered 2 children and started a romance with a magical interdimensional being
(the kids may not be biologically his but no one has to know that now do they... unless they do some ghostly bs of copying just a smidge of his dna)
Jason and Danny settled into the couch happily warm and comfy. Jason sighed deeply, and then set up a video call to B. He was so glad Danny would be here for this. It would be so much easier. Urgh, B answered almost immediately. Paranoid bastard.
Bruce saw the video pop up. With his son and the unknown being cuddled into his side. The children on their laps staring at him in fascination. Well, this would be interesting.
Jason: So. Guessing someone filmed us turning back?
Danny: The citizens have been watching our every public move love.
Bruce: They did yes. Do either of you have any idea what happened?!
Danny: I have a suspicion. Sadly I don't have proof. I need to go track down my adoptive Dad. It was PROBABLY him. But, he would have needed help. So...
Bruce: I see. And the children? Are, we're they?
Danny: Jordan and Ellie are mine. Their biological father is in prison. He will never be allowed near MY babies. Never again. They are coming up on six!
Jason: Yeah. Dan here taught me how to spit fireballs. gotta say, the only downside to being a cat? Was the lack of thumbs.
Ellie: We can still be cats though! Gotta practise so the change is easier though.
Bruce: Right. So. Your adoptive father is sufficiently powerful to change you into a new species? And decided to target my son as well?
Jason: Given we changed back after we agreed to date?
Danny: Yeah... I get the feeling Clockpa wanted to play matchmaker.
Bruce: Right. Do you need anything to contact him to ask?
Danny: Oh, he'll show up sooner or later to brag of it was him.
Dan:... If Jason is gonna be out Dad? Does that mean you're gonna be out Grandad!
Jason got the absolute joy of watching Bruce freeze. B visibly needed to take a moment to process that. Jason dropped a kiss on Dan's head for that. Glorious little mischief maker.
Jason: I mean. B IS my adoptive Dad. So yeah. When I convince your Mom to marry me.
Ellie: Sweet! We get a normal Grandad too! Clocky is so weird!
Dan: Uhuh. Fun though!
Danny: You love him. Dramatic time piece that he is!
Jason: B. Send Alfie over? I'm not sure if I can drive yet. My legs are still a bit wobbly. I want him to meet Danny and the kittens.
Jason then quickly hung up and grinned down at Danny and the kids. That should keep B nicely off balance. He sent a message on the family group chat as well. With a selfie of them on the sofa. Dan had retreated to Nekomata form. Ellie was cuddling him and say in their laps. Danny pecked him on the cheek just as the camera went off. It was a perfect way to cause chaos.
---
Now! To answer on my thoughts about the reveal? If the person filming was close enough? They heard them mention it being a curse of some sort. So people know they were human before. Somehow were both cursed, and met after. Falling in love and confessing broke the curse. Now, the biggest question Gotham has? Was it really a curse. Or was some higher being playing matchmaker really weirdly. Who were they? Was, was that Jason Todd-Wayne? Recently declared not dead actually™? Does Brucie now have a son in law and grandkids?!
The kids showed they could now transform at will!? Does this make them metas? Or is this magic fuckery? We KNOW Vicki Vale is going to try and track them down. The people want answers!
Personally I’m a fan having nobody recognize them bc
A) it’s funnier
and B) it makes it easy to explain away a lot of stuff:
None of them have any legal paperwork with their current identities (assuming Jason isn’t revived, Danny changed his name, and the kids don’t officially exist)? Of course they don’t, they were once cats!
They get extremely hostile and wary around certain people? It’s the animal instincts! They can sense danger!
They often act weird and not quite human? They’re not human! They’re magic cats!
One of the looks suspiciously like Jason Todd? Bam! People are going insane wondering if this counts as proof of reincarnation!
They real interesting question would be how the public would help them enter society. Do they need lessons on how to be human? Should we crowdfund them an apartment? Do they wanna go to school or get jobs? Should they let Bruce adopted his reincarnated son and his cat fam? Would Batman take them in and make them sidekicks? Should we protect them in a nature reserve? Should we get them protected species status? Fight the government for custody if they try anything?
Those sound like my kind of shenanigans. However, the idea of Vicki Vale trying to chase down one of them for an interview and fail miserably also sounds hilarious
Danny doesn't have paperwork n this dimension. Neither do his kids. Jason only has his Red Hood identities. None of them legally exist. And they are going to have fun with that! Bruce is trying to get something set up. But this is a situation where "everyone knows" they were magical cats before. Does he just, apply for help with that! Can he get the citizenship! He has enough money. But again, 'everyone knows'. This is going to be a headache.
It's a world where literal aliens exist, time travel happens sometimes, and it's not unheard of for people from other universes to get stuck there and need identification. There are absolutely processes for people that didn't exist before to get legal identification, and I'm pretty sure they all involve the Justice League!
It's just, uh, happening out in the open, here, which means that it's an opportunity for the Justice League to get some precidents in place for a government to provide legal identification for magical entities that spontaneously became human! A potential win for the good guys!
And people like Vicky Vale getting interviews with the cats-turned-people is, uh, part of the process. As uncomfortable as it's going to be for the "cats"
Yup. It's the fact that this is all widely known. And a lot of the stuff known? Isn't exactly uh, correct? Which paperwork does he file? What story are they going to run with? How honest are they being here? How willing to do this are the four of them? Bruce knows his Jaylad. He's a stubborn brat at the best of times. His partner may be just as bad.
Danny and Jason have probably already got the bare bones planned out for he story. They plan to lean on star crossed lovers. God's getting involved to give them a second chance. But... Jason wants to Fuck with B for a bit. Make him sweat. It's fun! Enrichment for the family! They'll tell him after they wander off to meet Ms Vale. He can learn through their interview!
Bruce is still freaking out trying to figure out what story their going with when someone posts a video online:
It’s Vicki Vale harassing Danny and the kids about getting an early interview. He looks super uncomfortable and wants to leave when one of the kids hisses at her and the other chomps on her leg.
It should be noted they were all in human form when this happened.
Vicki cried out and Danny made his move. He snatched up his kids, yelled “Sorry! Not day lady!”, and booked it out of there.
Then the video turned back to the person recording as the struggled to hold in laughter.
“I guess the cat instincts are still strong!” They say between giggles before the video cuts out.
Oh boy. They needed to get their story straight and plan their next move quick.
It was Ellie that bit her. Dan doesn't want a repeat of the child leash incident. So he gives a warning first now. Ellie however is Mom's favourite and never gets shoved in the harness. Which is SO not fair. (Dan isn't sulking! HE's not!)
They do eventually get visited by Clockwork and Lady Gotham. Jason is not going to complain about the fact his ghost Mom played matchmaker. He got Danny and the kids from it. Danny is just irritated that he wasn't given any information on the new dimension before being dumped here!
Alfred of course drove all four of them to the manor so he could meet them. He has also pulled up all of the videos of them online. He wants to watch their courtship to get a feel for their relationship. Seeing them like that makes it much easier to accept. Watching them now? Makes it even easier. They are clearly besotted.
Dan and Ellie make use of their new forms to thoroughly explore the manor. Playing hide and seek as kittens is even better than in human form! Also! Papa Jay has so many siblings? They get more family? Sweet! Adults to extort for treats! Adults who aren't used to their bullshit yet! Mwahahaha!
Damian is particularly susceptible when they are in kitten form. He can't help it! They are so small and cute! Danny fully agrees. They are cute enough in human form. In kitten form they are downright lethal with cuteness.
I have no idea. But! Jason is one of her favourite people. Her finding out he was given a magical cat form? She is going to be at his safe house asap. She would like to meet her grand kittens please. Don't give me that look! You didn't come over in car form! How dare! Give me the little ones! I brought accessories for when they want to run around as kittens! And toys! Snacks and clothes! Babies! Now mister!!
Danny and Selina will get on far too well for Bruce's peace of mind. Oh no, his son in law is liked by Selina? This is either good news, or terrible. At least he gave Bruce grandkids? Jason's siblings are currently in a war for affection. They want to be the favoured one! Danny and Jason are highly amused. Ahh, the chaos the kittens are going to cause!
Gotham and Clocky also bopping Selina and Bruce into Cats just after a spat. The Kittens are Cackling because they can wrestle with them now! And it's Danny's and Jason's turn to play Wingman!
Bruce is SO annoyed. He can't be Batman as a CAT! Selina is loving it OFC. Dream come true. She's even a MAGIC cat!! The rest of the Batkids are super jealous. Absolutely pester Danny and Jason till they ask for them to be given the power too. Clockwork and Gotham space it out. Teasing the rest of the family. But they now all have two forms. Bruce? Not happy that he wasn't given the ability to shift at will until he made up with Selina.
#i love how much more chaotic this has gotten since the last time i saw it#the chaos kittens are gonna be so feral in the manor#zoomies all day#absolutely tearing down the halls launching off the stairs bouncing off the walls#batfam will know no peace#the cuteness makes up for the chaos
Bruce sighed as he heard another crash in the distance. He slowly got up and wandered in the right direction. Just what had his grandkids broken now? They were devious little brats. Every time they came over something broke. And yet, they always acted cute. They consistently managed to rope his kids into the chaos too. Inevitably it would be one of them who actually broke whatever it was. The kittens sitting pretty and innocent of any wrong. Clever little brats. He adored them, truly, but they couldn't be more obviously Jason's if they tried.
You know how occasionally? Ra's has to get dunked to rehydrate in that good, good Youth Soup? And probably comes out looking Damningly Fine AF, as a chisled warrior man in his late to mid 20s?
........okay, so HEAR ME OUT.....
You ever date a Hot Passionate Bad Boy, that you KNOW is probably bad for you? Because he is REALLY charismatic? Remembers all the important dates and details. Has Hot Blooded roof top sword fights and dramatic cliff side brawls, with you? Talks like the most Dramatic! Nerd! You have? Ever Heard! *mysterious musical sting by full orchestra*
Swishy cape?
VERY Impressive muscles.
But so High Drama that even you, "Commit To The Bit" Danny, of the Good and Noble House "WHY IS EVERYTHING ON FIRE!?" Fenton, find him... occasionally A Bit Much(tm)?
Just? A REALLY Bad Idea in attractively form fighting luxury wear.
You get too fight ninjas.
..........Danny's not SAYING he gave into his worst Dumbass Thirst Impulses... but, uhhh, he's also? Not NOT saying it?
And it's becoming a problem.
Cause apparently their whole family is CLINGLY (Bruce, in the background of the call: No. REALLY? You DONT SAY?) when they decide they've found The One. And he was unaware of the Murder Cult. Yes! He KNOWS! Should have asked where the ninjas came from! But in his defense...
Hot man, no shirt-y, Danny brain go Dumb and Drools.
He had a fancy sword and wanted to fight, Jazz.
Danny was FLUSTERED!
He refuses to be Mrs. Cult Leader, Jazz! You dealt with hot bad boy Exs! What does he do!?
And just? Jazz? So... so tired. Dear lord, she thought Dani was bad. But no. No Dani came by her... EVERYTHING, honestly, didn't she? It's genetic. It has to be. Danny what the FUCK? When she said "you should get out more and see the workd" this is NOT WHAT SHE MEANT!
Danny? Is not really feeling the helpful vibes here, Jazz. Fine. He'll hunt down Talia. She'll help him! Surely SHE won't want him to be her new step-dad! Hmmmph! *click*
And THAT! Is how the Bats meet their new Son/Brother-in-Law, Danny. Jazz's baby brother.
You may be asking! "But Evil! Oh fabulously good looking and talented writer that you are! How did they MEET?" Which is understandable, basically EVERYONE but them is deeply confused. But! We must once again Remember and Reference *slaps Ra's time-line* that THIS baby? Has SOOOOOO much room for High Drama, Warrior Of Legend and Shadows, sword dueling and Machiavellian Bullshit!
The man's had MULTIPLE KIDS.
Even MORE Rivals Of The Era(TM) and lovers of Exemplary Skills in their chosen fields!
He also? Flirts and Seductively Subtexts at his favorite opponent like an absolute monster! Just? Non-stop. Nothing gets the blood up like a good ol fashioned Live Steel, roof top, duel to the presumed Death! Preferably atop a train racing through a perilous mountain range, during a ferocious thunderstorm, or at night as they pass through some cenic city full of lights.
You know... as one does.
He really does miss the days when Hot Young Exceptional Individuals would just? Grab a horse, a weapon, and come try to kill him. Maybe dedicate their lives to chasing him down and thwarting his schemes.
The youth these days are so BORING.
Oooooh, your technology box is threatening mine. Oh no. How ever will I recover? Why don't you try shooting at me from half a continent away next? Cower in a bunker like vermin, while trying to play "squash the dot" on your little screens? Pathetic! Boring!
Is there NO ONE to give him the fight he desires?!
*enter stage "Fuck Yoooooooou!" as Danny drop kicks one of his ninja down the street behind him*
He was probably at some highly traditional little café. Planning to have a "I'm totally Threatening You" chat with someone. Maybe stretch his legs and/or influence a bit. When? One of his underlings tried to intimidated the WRONG Feral Honey Badger, son.
Welcome too Pain.
Needless to say? It escalates. You kick ONE ninjas ass? His buddy's gonna take exception to that. So you kick HIS ass. You were just looking for a spot to get lunch, after all. Got things to do. And these guys are BORING. But! You kick a TEAM of ninjas asses?
Well now, suddenly their CAPTAIN wants a word.
Then HIS buddies.
Then THEIR commander.
All of a sudden? It's become A Whole Thing(tm). The street is full of ninja. You are still lunch-less. This has stopped being novel and midly amusing about 15 ninja ago. Then? They Dramaticly Part. A shop door is held open. Big Boss must be arriving. Time to kick HIS ass and go get lunch.
But!
Oh No. HE'S HOT.
Striding out with his Dramatic ass, silly looking, cloak. Which SHOULD be hilarious but somehow looks all Powerful and Cool. Traditional clothing, that hug his body in an open shirted and VERY favorable way. Almost aggressively masculine with all those masterfully honed muscles, perfectly complementary cologne, and darkly refined yet old-fashioned style.
Stance effortly balanced and instinctive.
Head tilted up at a regal and commanding angle.
He looks like a sexy warlord, straight from some work of high fiction. And he's being handed a sword. A NICE, master's work, well used but carefully maintained, LIVE BLADE. Oh.... Oh No.
He wants to fight?
But Danny's body isn't ready! His hair is a mess and he's been traveling all day! *flustered sputtering in Ghost* nuuuuuu~ ( TT-TT) why does Danny keep meeting Hot People only when he looks LIKE GARBAGE?!
Because! Ghosts? Fight to socialize. There is SUBTEXT(TM) to their fighting. Maaaybe its "ha! I think I'm stronger then you!" But maybe it's "hey! Let's be friends!". On occasion? It's even MORE then that. Sometimes? It's "hey ;) noticed your Super Awesome Fighting ;) wanna get up close and personal with me? And~ Fiiiight~♡ ;) "
Ra's is giving off "VERY Bad Boy Who Wants To DO THINGS To You" energy in this club tonight. Well, moderately small, countryside town at mid-day. But STILL! Danny was NOT PREPARED! Shocked, flustered, and maybe he's into this? He DOESNT KNOW?! Such aggressive SEDUCTION, SIR!
Did Ra's INTEND to send this Subtext? Not really. He came here to see the man delivering his highly trained underlings such humiliating defeat. But the youth does not back down. Does not grovel. Handles himself well.
It might be amusing, he thinks.
If it weren't for Pandora? Danny would be utterly CURB STOMPED. He's fought actual Concepts that hit less hard. The blade sings, the dance deadly, as it takes Danny everything he HAS to barely hold on.
His blood stains the blade.
Not much, but Ra's DOES get cuts in. However? It's enough for the sunlight to his those infinitesibly small bits of Ectoplasm in his blood, which makes up half of what he IS now, and light the droplets an almost iridescent green.
Green in a shade Ra's has WORSHIPPED for centuries.
Oh~?
The young man throws himself BACK and away. No where to flee, yet he is not trying too. Ra's allows it. Just to see what he will do. Then? Like blinding sunlight of the Pits surface, a rolling wave. Curtains parting to reveal the truth. A man made of Ice and Starlight. A magnificent Lazarus green light, like divinity shining from his skin. Eyes the color of the deepest waters of the Pits.
He becomes something MORE.
And no longer does Ra's hold the easy advantage. It? Is EXHILARATING. Each blow he blocks a fatale one, capable of caving in a lesser man's torso. The speed and boneless grace. His opponent free of gravities hold, as though floating the coldest waters, yet striking like meteors battering the Earth.
Ice, burning green light, and in the end?
A haunting swan song that rips apart all before it.
Ra's opponent escapes. More then half his men are critically wounded. He has broken ribs and more bruises then he's had in DECADES. He has? Not felt so ALIVE in over a century. Perhaps longer.
So obviously he tracks the man down again.
Repeatedly.
To his endless delight? Unlike CERTAIN people, the man flirts back. Fights brutally. They dance between death and passion, tearing up everything in their wake. The man seeming to be genuinely flattered and intrigued by Ra's interest. And really, Ra's is nothing if not a persuasive man.
They drink fine wines as they battle wits, they dine as they smirk and purr such DEADLY threats, there are such MAGNIFICENT battles at every local. He sends Danny, (not Daniel, never Daniel, unless he wishs too invoke disgust) gifts. Blades and treasures from beyond Earth's soil. Interesting information on places to visit or explore.
For Danny is free and unrestrained, wild in his nature.
For once it is RA'S who chases. He can not say it is unpleasant. Rather, it has become an exciting turn of events. But... once AGAIN? Those insipid and short sighted "Heros" meddle. While he had been careful to keep his passions from the eyes of the Detective and his ilk, he underestimated the rare intelligence of those costumed imbeciles closer to Nanda Prabat.
They confronted Danny.
Ran their ill informed and uneducated mouths.
And NOW? They've gotten Danny's back up. Twisted the truth into something Danny will never accept. Ras has had no chance to ease him into things, to explain his ambitions. And now he flits and flees at even the SLIGHTEST indication of Ra's or his men's presence! It is like chasing the wind itself!
Ra's is FURIOUS.
Not at Danny, of course, he is merely being true to his nature. Made no secret of his views or stances. But at those IMBECILES? At the so called "villains" who should have been KEEPING THEM OUT OF HIS LOVE LIFE? Livid. Wroth.
And now his CHILDREN. His GRANDCHILDREN! Are acting like they have a say in who he does and does not marry! Whom he takes to his bed! Must he ask their permission to hold his lovers HAND next?! For how long did he tolerate your infatuation with the Detective, Talia?! Long after he had proven unreasonable? That's what he thought.
Now if you'll EXCUSE him, not that you have a say, he shall be planning a raid on several illicit stores of alien technology. He requires bait, if he is to entice his lover to stop fleeing and actually SPEAK with him. *dramatically exits*
I'm just saying, if anything, Danny got the 'morally questionnable at best men get obsessed with me' gene from Maddie.
I also think it would be so hilarous if Talia is against until she actually meets Danny. Then? Oh she's helping keeping meddlers away while her father tries to speak with his beloved.
Now Danny is actually quite heartbroken. He really liked Ra's, he's been complaining (more like crying to) his ghost friends and honestly Ellie is not happy that someone broke her template's heart.
The Truth comes Out?! Maddie's Genes are to blame?! Is TRUE! And you SHOULD say it!
And Talia is like "No. Absolutely not. It will never happen, I do not allow it. I want that vermin AWAY from my fa- *locks eyes on the Specialist Of Baby Boys, who radiates Feral Energy and yet somehow manages to look genuinely kind and impish* ........Well then. I'm glad my Father finally found a sense of taste. Honestly, too good for my father. We shall have spa days and delightful brunches. Family bonding sword fights. I shall be his FAVORITE Daughter."
(ELSEWHERE! Dani feels suddenly and vaguely... challenged. As though someone thought they could unseat her from her Favorite Daughter throne....)
Hilariously? I think Ra's would DELIGHT in having Dan as a son. The man is a brick shit house of murder and power, coated in rage. His new step-son is his Favorite and he WILL tell you that to your face.
But also like?
Deathstroke tends to work with the League of Assassins.
He too, is a Trash Highly Competent Older Man(TM). And... honestly? I wanna give Dick psychic damage. Ra's a stroke. Of all the warriors and monsters ON EARTH... you point to The Reprobate trying to take over his League and go "that trashfire. I want him."?!
Dan.
Have STANDARDS!
And just? Danny tearfully acting like Ra's hide a gambling addiction or something. He... he just not sure he can FORGIVE this, you know? Behind his back! When was he going to even tell him!? THE WEDDING!? *sobs into his handkerchief as, in all likelihood Harkey Quinn, makes "there there" noises*
He TRIED getting sympathy from his Sister, but nooooooo! Her hubby apparently has beef with his partner! At least Miss Quinzel gets it!
Howdy Howdy! System Possession is a SVSSS AU born by accident and fueled by brainrot and quick sketches!
The AU started because I drew a few pages for @fairsweetlonging System reveal au, and then started going insane about potential system possession with friends.
-The story-
1 - [System Reveal]
The peak lords first notice the system.
2 - [Possession]
The system has taken over!
3 - [First Mission]
Liu Qingge wants answers...
4 - [Mission Complete!]
However, he may not like them.
5 - [Are these roles fixed?]
Yue Qingyuan has a chat with the System.
6 - [Liu Qingge Extra]
These missions cause qi-deviations, Mu Qingfang listens to his shixiong while he checks on him.
7 - [The Plan]
Shang Qinghua comes up with a plan for dealing with the System.
8 - [He's just worried.]
Lou Binghe is worried about his Shizun so he asks for help!
9 - [The room]
Shizun is in his room, reading a bad book about his friend's suffering.
10 - [ -Mu Qingfang- Is a good character!]
Mu Qingfang has a conversation with the System.
11 - [Disciple's Extra]
Moving many disciples is already difficult, even worse if they are too worried to move!
12 - [Mu Qingfang Extra]
Mu Qingfang just completed his first mission! Be nice to him.
13 - [This defective System]
Shang Qinghua's System makes an appearance.
14 - [The Meng Mo Intervention]
Shen Qingqiu may not be in his room for much longer!
15 - [The Breaking Point - Part 1]
Yue Qingyuan comes to a realization during a mission.
16 - [The Breaking Point - Part 2]
wtf zhangmen-shixiong, that's scary.
17 - [Missing file]
System Error.
18 - [10%]
Shang Qinghua would like to know what's going on?
19 - [9%]
This system has a solution
20 - [8%]
This system has no time to lose.
21 - [There he is!]
So this is where User02 has been hiding all along!
Fuuuuck dude I got drunk last night and tried to take down the villain on my own and now he’s texting me some ‘I’m the only one allowed to defeat you’ shit bro what do I do
(On Hiatus for the rest of the month while I work on other things)
Soon after Danny takes two of the failed clones into his body his parents let Vlad take him to a Gala in Gotham. When the Bats clock that he is pregnant they work to get him away from Vlad, find out how and why this happened to him, and fix it.
Danny is just relieved to finally have some adults on his side, and be able to relax and focus on himself and the babies.
Part 1 - Gala and discovery
Part 2 - confronting Vlad and calling The Guy
part 3 - Research and meeting Zatana
part 4 - Raiding Amity
part 5 - Jazz and Danny reunite
part 6 - Jazz's power point
part 7- Damian and Danny bond and Jason comes back
Part 8- Jason meets Jazz
Part 9- Jason meets Danny (finally)
Part 10- Danny calls his friends
Part 11- First date (part 1)
part 12- first date (part 2)
Part 13- Danny's doctors appointment
Part 14- Jason and Danny go camping
Part 15- Vlad crashes the party
Part 16- Frostbite comes to give various check ups
Part 17 - meeting the Justice League
Too many people very kindly asked to be tagged so I've made a master post people can subscribe to! I will reply to this post to inform anyone subscribed about new chapters. Thank you
Writing Prompt: When you were a teenager, a truck nearly ran you over. Your significant other wasn't so lucky.
Today, you had another close encounter with a truck, and this time it got you. You've been Isekai'd. But when you wake up in the other world, you see a familiar face. They're older and got a few scars, but it's definitely your old sweetheart.
You have a heartful reunion. You catch up on your lives, you make arrangements for a new life together.
"What luck that we both wound up here." you say during dinner.
"Luck?" your other half laughs and nearly drops their roast pixie. "Who do you think guided the truck that brought you here?"
This time it's your turn to nearly drop your food.
Your lover smiles, but there's something strange in their eyes. "I missed you so much, baby."
Another silly idea based on Shen Yuan being Xin Mo's favorite only now with Binggeyuan.
After the Bingmei Vs Bingge extra Bingge searching for Shen Yuan and finds him...only from Xin Mo to call dibs.
Xin Mo ending up through he portal and not Bingge. Shen Yuan seeing it and 'Oh yeah I ordered a replica of XIn Mo wow this way better quality than I was expecting'
Just Xin Mo happy as can be in pride of place on the PIDW hate shrine listening to Shen Yuan as he rants about web-novels and writes the most scathing brutal comments.
Xin Mo: This is heaven the hatred and rage so perfect.
Bingge keeps trying to bust in to realm but keeps getting bridenappingblocked by HIS FUCKING SWORD.
His sword that he is melting down to scarp metal and throwing into the abyss after this is done.
Just Bingge trying to get to Shen Yuan but constantly stopped by XIn Mo...
Bonus Mobei Jun is just chilling in modern world, as he's now the mode of transportation since Xin Mo is no longer Bingge's. Him finding airplane by accident and like '...Mine'
Sillier idea counterpoint? @fangirlingpuggle in most Xanxia worlds? Plants, animals, and basicly anything with a conscious mind can cultivate. Work their way through Ascension.
Is Xin Mo NOT demonicly cultivating power? Stealing it and generating MORE?
Xin Mo could TOTALLY be reaching the threshold where they Cultivate to a humanoid body! Why indirectly fuck and murder, when YOU could do it? Why wait on a sword stand, when you could drape luxuriously over your hate-filled little gremlin man and as him to "tell me more~♡" and "is it REALLY so awful? How?"
Now? Bingge's fuckin SWORD is trying to STEAL HIS MAN.
Xin Mo is getting all the Rage from Bingge AND his beloved lil hater. All the violence from fighting Bingge off. The EXTRA rage, from all the fucking he's doing with HIS Shen Yuan, who's cool sword turned into an androgynous Pretty Guy. Bingge is going feral. Mobei-jun is getting boba with his hamster.
Bingge: I am will do it with my bare hands, I don't trust any other sword to also not fall in love with Shen Yuan
Bingge planning on literally imprisoning Shen Yuan in castle with NO magic artifacts or plants or animals that could (will probably) fall in love with Shen Yuan.
Also Xin Mo before getting human form being bale to use powers to manipulate computer basically replying to comments and egging on Shen Yuan into more rants.
SVSSS Slasher AU where Shen Yuan transmigrates into a slasher story he was reading, but he never got to the end before he died, so he has no idea who the culprit is. All he knows is that his character dies horribly, and he wants to avoid that
Cue Shen Yuan doing everything to not fall for slasher tropes. He never splits up from his friends, he doesn't have sex with anyone (he wasn't planning on it anyway!!), and he does everything he can to solve the mystery without jumping to conclusions
In the friend group is Luo Binghe, who was bullied by the group when he was young and poor, but now that he has money, he inserted himself into the group to get his revenge on everyone, especially Shen Qingqiu. But right when he started his revenge, Shen Qingqiu changed. He was now nicer to everyone, especially Luo Binghe. Eventually Luo Binghe changes his plan to kill everyone but him
Soon the others in the group point their fingers at Luo Binghe for being the culprit because they think he's the only one with a possible motive, but Shen Qingqiu defends him, and tries to get everyone to calm down because he knows that in slasher stories, the one being accused by everyone is always a red herring! He now 100% believes Luo Binghe's innocence and continues investigating
Eventually it's just 3 of them left, and Shen Yuan knows that the third friend has to be the killer! They were the first to accuse Luo Binghe, and their family business has recently been going under (this was also caused by Luo Binghe), so motive! They clearly resented their rich friends and were killing them all!!
Luo Binghe kills them and Shen Yuan is happy that both he and his favorite character made it through the story alive. Luo Binghe convinces him that they should stay together forever after experiencing such an ordeal, and Shen Yuan agrees. If sometimes people in their life somehow die horribly, well he is still in a slasher, and Luo Binghe makes sure to always keep him safe!
When Danny said, “You guys should meet my parents,” the Batkids had collectively paused.
Jason: “Aren’t those the ones who tried to dissect you?”
Danny: “They got better.”
Damian: “You are very casual about attempted vivisection.”
Danny: “Welcome to the Fenton family, baby.”
Dick: “This can’t possibly go wrong.”
Steph: “Famous last words.”
FentonWorks — Amity Park
The Batkids stepped out of the Fenton RV, staring up at the lime green, Frankenstein’d-together house with a giant ectoplasmic turret on top.
Tim whispered, “That building violates every safety code I’ve ever studied.”
“Which means it’s perfect,” Jason grinned.
The front door burst open.
“DANNY-BOY!” Jack Fenton roared, charging out in a hazmat suit and hugging Danny so hard he phased to avoid cracked ribs.
“And these must be your little friends!” Maddie beamed. “Are they in your ghost hunting club? Vigilante group? Paranormal protection gang?”
Jason: “...Yes.”
Inside the Lab
Danny’s siblings (by chaos, not blood) stood in awe-slash-terror as Jack proudly showed off the Fenton Arsenal™.
“We’ve got Ecto-Blasters, Specter Snare Cannons, the Ghost Gabber 9000—”
“That one doesn’t do anything,” Danny stage-whispered. “It just yells ghost puns.”
“—and of course, my favorite,” Jack said, hefting a glowing, bazooka-sized monstrosity, “The Fenton Anti-Creep Stick™!”
“Can I hold it?” Jason asked immediately.
Danny: “You really, really shouldn’t—”
Jack: “You absolutely can!”
Danny: “—oh god.”
Jason grinned like a kid in a candy store as he hoisted the Anti-Creep Stick and blew a crater in the backyard. “I LOVE YOUR DAD.”
Gift Time
“So!” Maddie chirped. “We made each of you a custom ghost-defense item!”
Danny: “...Please be small.”
They were not.
Jason got a pair of twin ecto-revolvers — glowing green, sleek, with ghost-seeking tech embedded in the handles. He was in love.
Tim got a pocket-sized spectral scanner that unfolded into a full laptop. (“It hacks through dimensions,” Maddie said proudly. Tim nearly cried.)
Damian was gifted a miniaturized spectral scimitar. Jack added, “It sings your theme song when it powers up!” Damian smiled — a terrifying, sharp little smile.
Steph got an ectoplasm glitter bomb launcher. She immediately set it off in the kitchen. Maddie was delighted.
Dick received ecto-infused grappling hooks that let him swing through walls. He hugged both parents on the spot.
Later That Night
The Batkids lounged on beanbags in Danny’s room, covered in marshmallow goo from Fenton family s’mores night.
Steph: “Your mom tackled a ghost into the barbecue pit.”
Tim: “Your dad gave me a hug that cracked my ribs.”
Jason (stroking his new guns lovingly): “I’m moving in.”
Danny: “You’ll regret that at 3AM when the fridge starts screaming.”
Damian: “Your father attempted to high-five me. I allowed it. Once.”
Danny snorted. “He’s gonna cry from happiness later.”
Meanwhile, in the Fenton Kitchen
Maddie sipped her tea. “They’re good kids.”
Jack nodded, eyes misty. “Do you think if we adopt them too, we can finally start that Ghost Hero Team I always wanted?”
Maddie smiled. “Let’s give them snacks first.”
Group Chat: [Batfam + Phantom of the Groupchat]
Jason: Can I call your dad Pops?
Danny: ...I literally do not have the power to stop you.
Steph: i want to go back next weekend. ghost dodgeball rematch.
Damian: I defeated the kitchen specter with honor. Fenton called it a “heckin’ good whack.”
Tim: I still don’t know how the toaster is haunted.
Dick: Best parents. A+++ would let them arm me again.
Danny: they’re already building a tank for you.
Bruce: WHAT DO YOU MEAN "A TANK"
Danny: Too late B. You’re a Fenton by association now 😎
Technus made a VR headset!
It's being sold to ghosts, as a ghost-only product, and Danny is very excited.
It's powered by the users ecto, and has been peer reviewed by not just Point Dexter, but also Walker and Ember and the Box Ghost. It's not a trap!
It's just Technus raking in payment in the form of old and new tech from across all dimensions for his lair in return for one of the headsets!
Danny makes sure the anti-ghost system in the house is off, that his door is locked, and slips on the VR headset in preparation for something phenominal. So far, there's only one game, but it's very popular among ghosts.
[Welcome, User P H A N T O M. Please select a sigil to determine your starting point.]
Danny selects the picture of...hmm. What to choose, what to choose.
He chooses...the lightning bolt.
Danny blinks and he's staring up at a strange woman.
Danny very quickly finds out that while this game is super popular with ghosts, for someone like Danny, who's half living? Kind of boring.
Because it's a life simulator.
It's like if a bunch of orcs and wizards played DnD, but the game was about working in an office.
In this particular simulation, he's the son of a single mother, who he apparently takes after; black hair, blue eyes. When he grows up he isn't gonna look any different from how he does IRL.
Sooo...no character customization. Damn.
He gets named Daniel, because obviously?
His life is painfully mundane; he has no powers, he's just an average human. Which is a pity, because in this world/server there's other heroes with super powers, and he would have loved to have been able to join in on their shenanigans.
He wakes up. He plays. He eats. He goes to sleep.
Then he gets old enough to go to school, which. Ugh. Not again.
New routine. wake up, school, go home, snacks, homework, sleep.
He makes a few friends, but not really. It's hard to be friends with NPCs, after all.
Then he hits ten, and uh.
He has a power?
Super speed. He has super speed.
His mother breaks down crying when she sees him disappear and reappear on the other side of the room.
He's the second Flash's son, who said man has no idea exists.
After that is a whirlwind of trying to pretend he doesn't have powers, slipping up, getting involved in a fight, outing himself, getting him and his mom absorbed into the Flash family by osmosis, and after about five more years, he's essentially forgotten that this is a VR game.
Then his dad is about to take a hit, and Danny dives in front, tanking it.
Danny dies in his father's arms, only for the oncoming peace of death to be interrupted with
[GAME OVER. ONE TIME USAGE COMPLETE.]
Danny bolts upright, hands on his chest, panting.
Wait, game over? Right, right, the VR headset.
No, wait...one time usage?! What a rip off!
Danny hides his grief at losing his NPC family behind the rage of the one time usage, and pretends the tears leaking out of his eyes are from fury.
~~~~~~
Wally clutches the broken body of his son, trying so, so hard not to snap.
He'd only had Danny for five years.
Five fucking years. He'd missed most of Danny's life, and...and because of one stupid fucking mistake, because he hadn't been good enough...
Wally feels his body begin to distort, the Speedforce responding to his rage with an otherworldly indifference to what rules of reality his body is supposed to obey.
Danny has to be alive, in at least one reality.
Wally is going to find him, consequences be damned.
TLDR; Technus makes a one time use headset for ghosts to get to live another life, and neglects to mention that it's actually temporarily removing their consciousness and placing it into people who otherwise wouldn't be alive.
Danny thinks it was just a game.
To his grieving Speedster father he gained in that reality, however, it very much was not a game, and the man is currently on his way to Danny's home reality after going on a grief bender that would make Batman blush.
Danny was a quiet kid, always had been, unobtrusive, smart, in fact many told her her son was very gifted.
He picked up everything so fast in class, soaked up knowledge like a sponge. But per the advice of others she did have him tested for autism, because her boy was distant, some teachers called it detached.
Like he just didn’t care about the people around him.
It had been a huge source of worry right up until his tenth birthday and her boy discovered his gift of superspeed.
It was like a switch had been flipped, like he’d been waiting his whole life for that to happen.
Danny was still Danny of course, still loved space and wanting to be an astronaut, still a gamer, still a fan of indie rock bands.
But after that there was a sparkle in his eyes that hadn't been there. He stood up straighter, started mumbling a lot less.
How could she not support him every step of the way? brainstorming suit designs and hero names, (in the end Danny had settled on Redline after “to cross the red line”) Soon stepped in during a big fight and next thing they knew he was meeting his father and his extended family and their little world suddenly got so much bigger, so much more complicated.
But he thrived, her boy was so happy.
And then came that awful, awful day…
God her boy was only fifteen years old.
The other members in the Flash family tried their hardest to comfort her but she wasn’t ashamed to admit that she completely withdrew within herself in an attempt to cope.
Mothers shouldn’t outlive their sons, not even if their sons were superheroes.
So… When eventually Wally showed up in front of her, telling her he found a way to fix it, fix everything, he just needed a little blood, she hadn’t really questioned any of it.
“You’ll bring my boy back?”
“I’ll bring our boy home, yes.”
“But you need my blood?”
“Our blood, yeah,” he shows off a little vial he’s already got from himself, “it’s to track him down, after that it should just be a quick run on the cosmic treadmill and-”
Well she doesn’t know about all that but if he can bring their son back.
“Alright, how do I-?”
The how didn’t matter, She knows these heroes perform miracles on the regular.
“Once he’s back he’s so grounded” She says.
Wally snorts, but it sounds choked up and rather wet.
The funeral is small, just the family and close friends.
It’s a windy and dreary affair, but no rain, which Wally thinks is unfair.
If it’s going to be cloudy and depressing at least have it rain, now it’s just miserable and there will be no stars.
Danny loves- loved the stars.
he wipes his hand over his eyes and decides to just leave it there for a while. Why is it that he constantly finds himself wishing to be faster only to then wish everything would just slow down already.
Five years is not enough.
It’s not enough.
An arm wraps around his shoulders, it’s firm and heavy and for a moment he thinks it’s Dick but a look to the side reveals that it’s Roy.
The look on his face is hard to decipher and… Ah, yeah of course, that makes sense.
Wally turns to lean further into him.
“Does it get easier to handle?” Wally can’t help but ask him, dreading the answer.
Roy doesn’t say anything at all. Which he guesses is answer enough.
The silence stretches and then,
“Don’t do something you’re going to regret.”
“I wasn’t-”
“I know what you’re actually capable of, Fleetfeet. You already beat that guy to near death.”
Roy squeezes Wally’s shoulder tighter, “you will have thoughts, they will sound like great ideas but I can tell you right now Danny isn’t going to want any of that.”
Wally clenches his teeth and hisses into Roy’s shoulder, “Danny is dead. He doesn’t want anything anymore”
Finding a way to trace a soul had been worryingly easy, getting what he needed to actually do so also had not been hard, avoiding his friends without raising too much suspicion and then staying ahead of the family so he can actually pull this off had been a little tricky, but doable.
He’s not going to cause a Flashpoint guys, he lived the consequences of Barry’s fuckup dammit, and all the crap that came after, he’s still struggling with thinking about anything having to do with Sanctuary.
Anyway, no, getting on the treadmill and going had actually been the easy part.
Turns out, strap in this is a doozy, turns out going down this road would trigger Black Flash.
Which is just great, fantastic.
Wally figures it makes sense, Danny died… and he’s now actively trying to undo it in a sense, he’s kinda cheating, Like, he is trying really hard to just not think at all about the morality of alternate-reality-son-taking.
He’s pretty sure there is a movie where a guy did that… it didn’t end well for the guy, or his daughter… or the entire reality.
… but that’s for future Wally to deal with!
Wally is going to get his son back and this fast zombie is just going to have to suck it!
That being said he would really like it if speed corpse could back off a bit… finding Danny with that thing hot on his heels is difficult, staying ahead is using up a lot of his thinking which means there is not much left for looking around, finding, grabbing and then going back home (yes that’s basically the plan now).
Things get incredibly messy when Wally gets cornered and he has to think of something quick, quick, now, to deal with Black Flash or else-
There is a flash of green light, for one delirious moment Wally thinks a Green Lantern somehow followed him here, maybe Kyle, or Hal. But as he watches Black Flash take a bad hit from the green stuff there is a realization that it can’t be them because Black Flash is for Speedsters, and nobody else.
Then Wally sees a boy with dark hair, holding his side as if injured but with one hand outstretched and a green glow still coming from his hand.
“Fl-ash..?” the boy says, sounding slurred and confused. Meanwhile fast zombie is slowly getting back up.
“can’t-” Danny doesn’t hesitate to hit him with another green energy attack, “haaavvvv-” Black Flash starts dissolving, for a lack of a better term, into more green goop.
The sight of it would probably be traumatising if Wally bothered to look at it but instead he’s sped over to Danny’s side.
Because this is Danny, same hair same eyes same age even, probably, and he recognized Wally! sorta, well he recognized Flash- does this reality have a Flash? Wally didn’t really check actually…
But he’s injured! Is that why Black Flash was after him? to stop him from saving his son?
“hey- hey don’t worry” Wally says as he speed checks over Danny’s body for more injuries, the one on his side looks bad and burnt, like he got hit by some sort of energy weapon. “I’m here to help, we’ll fix this.” And he will, or he’ll die trying, any other outcome is completely unacceptable.
Danny starts saying, “how-” when he’s interrupted by the sound of running footsteps. and then he’s scrambling, tugging at Wally, “go! "We have to go!!”
Wally has a tight hold on Danny and pushes the boy behind him as two persons round the corner. Both wear full body hazmat suits, one in eye bleeding orange the other in less painful to look at teal. But both are wielding futuristic looking weaponry that’s pointed directly at his son.
“Sir! step away from the boy! He may look harmless but he’s a vile ghost in disguise!! he’s merely pretending to be a hurt teenager!”
Wally blinks and slowly moves to hide even more of Danny behind him, “okay- how about-”
Danny whimpers, “Dad…”
Oh okay, okay yeah nevermind actually.
Wally completely misses the one in the teal suit say, “stop pretending to be our son you filthy spook” as he hoists his boy up and speeds away.
Why even waste time trying to calm and talk down two obvious trigger happy lunatics, his son is hurt and in need of care. Once Danny is patched up he can just take him home where those two can never even hope to follow them. And then everything will be as it should be.
Vlad makes an appearance before Wally manages to wisk Danny back to his own reality.
"Oh little badger, I heard the tragic horrible news about your parents. Surely now you see that i-"
He finally actually looks at Wally.
Internally his brain is like "I believe in miracles. Since you came along, you sexy thing"
And after that he's just stuck bluescreening because, Gay? No, Bisexual??
Meanwhile Wally simultaneously wants to fight this Abra Kadabra looking weirdo and demand some answers and Danny is trying to get Wally away from Vlad as soon as possible cause nothing good will come out of this, that's for sure.
Wally recognized and Does Not Like that creepy, predatory tone this guy showed up and started talking to his son in. Wally is all the more determined to get his son out of this dimension as soon as he knows his body can handle the trip.
Long ago, when Wally had been lost in the Speedforce. Once he got out and rejoined everyone once again there had still been the issue of basically nobody remembering he ever existed before.
Back then the other Titans had their memories returned to them once they touched him.
Wally thinks something similar is happening to Danny right now.
Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that both Dannies seem to have the same soul, and now that Wally has come here the universe is trying to make it all make sense.
Either way, Danny is clearly carefully navigating two sets of memories and judging by how he talks about himself right now he’s startled that both sets are ‘real’.
Wally will be supportive and patient though, this is in his opinion the best case scenario because this really is his son still. And so far reality isn’t pancaking and imploding in on itself sooo… all’s good!
Meanwhile as Wally carefully and gently takes care of the wound on his side, Danny doesn’t know what to think anymore.
Now that his life can not go any more wrong he actually got rescued from his parents by his VR dad.
Wally West, the Flash, somehow came to life, or… or something, and is now a real person.
And he saved Danny and he’s now patching him up and he’s clearly very carefully trying to talk about who he is in relation to Danny.
Danny doesn’t really want to think anymore about which life is real, which parents are real. Cause these are the facts, he had a dad that shot at him, and now he has a dad that’s finished with the bandages and is awkwardly trying to tell him how his other mom misses him before backtracking cause that sounds weird, he’s being weird, if Danny needs a break then he can just shut up.
Danny doesn’t want him to shut up. Instead he hugs Wally tight around the middle.
He wants to be held back, and his VR dad never disappoints.
He wants out of the absolute nightmare his life has become, he wants to go back to his VR life where both his parents love him with or without super powers.
Wally tells him everything is going to be alright, and Danny believes him because he really doesn’t want to think about the alternative right now.
Danny is probably going along with this whole thing way too easily…
And then eventually of course Vlad had to ruin it.
“Dracula smurf!?” he stammers, looking indignant. But what’s actually more upsetting to Danny is that he clearly sees that Vlad doesn’t seem as insulted as he should be.
Whatever is going through Vlad’s head cannot be good, Danny has to shut it down here and now. “He’s a weirdo fruitloop who is obsessed with me joining his side”
“Daniel” Vlad growls.
Wally frowns, “got it, time to go then.”
And before Vlad can even start saying “now wait just a moment,” the hottest guy he’d ever seen in his life had blinked out of existence with only faint electric crackling still in the air.
And Danny is gone too, that’s the second thing Vlad realizes.
A quick sweep with his ghost senses reveals to him that this isn’t a case of Danny just turning them invisible. The two of them are gone, gone.
returning home was straightforward and simple, right back through the Speedforce until-
It was impossible not to know, as a speedster you just do, instinctively.
Danny looks over Wally’s shoulder as he asks, “he’s right behind us isn’t he?”
“I thought-” that he was just a regular ghost, some average nuisance that decided to harass someone in Amity, Danny starts to realize that was not the case. “What is that?”
“Black Flash. And he’s… regular death isn’t fast enough for us. it can’t keep up, he can.”
“We’ll see about that,” Danny mutters as green pools in his hand.
“Wasn’t he there for you? when you… ” died.
“The alley in Amity was the first time I’ve ever seen this dude.” Was that because he was technically already dead? always had been? To be honest trying to make sense of what exactly happened with the VR is still seriously making Danny’s head hurt.
“There is nothing to worry about, I will outrun it, I have done so before. Just hold on tight Danny.”
And Danny does, and he agrees with Wally, with his dad.
There will be nothing to worry about, after all, Black Flash is still some manner of entity from the Infinite Realms, and that means- Just like in that alley-
Danny lifts his arm and lets the build up of ecto energy loose.
there is a flash of green as it hits, quickly expanding in eye scorching white as it expands through the speedforce itself. Catches up to them.
The first thing he’s aware of is a familiar, fond sounding voice, "You never fail to amuse me Daniel"
"Clockwork!? Wh.. what is going on, I- my dad, Wally- where is..."
"You caused a crack, nothing too significant, it'll mend itself in an instant. But in the seconds between seconds a lot can happen."
Danny can't see himself, he can't see clockwork either. It's all feeling. And currently he’s feeling like he’s flailing in place.
"Wait, you sound like clockwork but are you even? I'm so confused, it's too bright."
There is a soft chuckle, "remember what he said? Don't worry, everything will soon be as it should be. But let me tell you this, for you that headset wasn't an escape. It was a solution."
"A solution? For what, I don't understand."
"I'm afraid things were never going to end well..."
Danny thinks, it feels like forever, it feels like an instant.
It's awfully convenient isn't it? To be connected to the heroes that can go to alternative realities the easiest.
"I was meant to die... in that alley." Without Flash, without Wally... he wouldn't have made it, that's why Black Flash-
"I'm sorry Daniel." After all, he's quite selfish and rather arrogant actually. If he can't intervene he'll find someone who can. Because Danny is special, precious. Flash sees that too, which is good.
"It's time."
"Time for what?"
"To go, do extraordinary things, I'll be watching."
"Wait-!"
It's dark.
Cold.
Quiet.
Cramped.
Danny shifts, there is barely any wiggle room, wherever he is, seriously just now he felt stretched in all and every direction and now it’s the exact opposite.
Then he notices that his clothes are different. his hoodie and jeans are gone, instead whatever he's wearing feels smoother, less worn, and most notably, surprisingly cold.
He also can't feel the shifting of bandages on his side.
When he presses there is no pain, no wound.
He feels around himself more carefully, there is cushioning below, on the sides... in front of him.
If he didn't know any better he'd say he's in a...
Casket.
Okay, alright, no problem just go ghost and-
... he can't.
When he reaches inside he can sense his core. It's smaller than it's supposed to be, still there but significantly weaker. He can't transform.
He really has to fight to not have his breathing pick up, then a familiar humming spreads through his body in response to his budding panic.
“Okayokayokayokayokayokayokay,”
He clamps down on it straight away, he can't have superspeed happening right now, that means faster everything, he'll be through his oxygen in record time. It's time to think first. Fast, not too fast, dammit!
Tears start stinging his eyes and he shimmies agitatedly to get his hands up and wipe them away.
"Dad..." He whimpers, Wally had been right there with him, where did he go? Is he above? Wondering how and why they ended up at the place they apparently buried Danny. Oh Ancients, he’s buried.
He shouts, "DAD!"
It’s awfully loud in his cramped little space.
If someone with superhearing could hear him right now that would be great.
But there is nothing and Danny doesn't think he's got that much time to waste.
He's going to have to phase through and up... and that's a bit of a problem because he's incredibly bad at it.
Before he thought it was ironic and a little amusing considering his past. Now he's just freaking out about that fact.
"It'll be fine, if I fuck it up I'll just die faster" probably by blowing up, vibrating molecules and all that.
He fumbles at his neck and unfastens his tie, they put him in a tie, he’s really not a fan of those things.
His da- Jack would just wear a tie over his hazmat suit and that completely ruined their intended serious appearance and Danny just can’t see them the same way.
Also he tends to feel like he’s being strangled when he wears one.
He’ll be sure to tell them that once he gets out, “hey, thanks for not cremating me. Please don’t put me in a tie next time though.”
Alright that’s enough stalling, it’s do or die, or die doing. Danny decides to go with the Bart method and just not think about it.
lightning crackles around him as he lets the thrumming pick back up, he puts his hands on his ceiling, the lid of the casket. He ignores the sweat beading on his forehead.
Wally looks around, ignoring the slightly smoking cosmic treadmill.
One second he'd been running, the next there had been a flash of light and both Black Flash and Danny had vanished and he'd been dropped here, right where he started, perhaps a single second right after he left in the first place.
"Danny!"
This can’t be happening, his thoughts start racing going through what just happened again. And again, and again.
electricity sparks and arcs over to the treadmill causing it to let out a shrill error noise.
Wally grips at his hair. The thoughts circle again, Speedforce- Black Flash- Danny- bright light- nothingnothingnothing.
That thing wasn’t anywhere near them, it’s impossible that he could've gotten to Danny, there is no way. Did Danny slip, is he still in the Speedforce!? Wally had held on so tight- he’s actually pretty sure his boy might have bruises from that.
Wally groans, grips harder, lights flicker, more arcs, something shatters, he’s not getting enough air, he’s not-
“Wally!” hands clasp his shoulders tightly. Wally startles and gasps, there is a loud thrum with one last arc of electricity, several light bulbs snap and shatter, both men flinch under the spray of sparks.
“Breathe- breathe with me, c’mon big gulp”
Oh it’s barry, Wally tries, it goes- well there is an attempt for sure.
“Everything is going to be okay.”
“No. nonononono-” that doesn’t help at all, the thoughts circle again. Wally feels like he should move, do something, anything!
There is still time, this is hardly the first time something goes fucky along the way, he just has to- hast to.
“Wally please-”
“I have to, Danny-”
Barry looks pained, “there… is nothing you can do, you know-”
“NO! You don’t get it Barry, he was right there, I had him!”
Now Barry looks very alarmed, “Wally… what did you do…”
For some reason, it’s that particular tone that causes Wally to snap out of his spiraling and agitatedly he snaps, “I didn’t go back in time to change his death I’m not an idiot” in one rush.
Barry really has to fight the slightly offended feeling that pipes up first thing, his lips press together in a thin line and then he reminds himself that getting snippy back isn’t going to help anything.
“Then what did you do?” okay so that might have still sounded kinda… ah, whatever.
“...Let’s just say that instead of going back I thought it would be smarter to go sideways. Listen, that’s not important right now-”
Okay that’s bullshit, “Wally-”
“-What is important is that Danny got lost along the way, most likely because of Black Flash’s meddling.”
Barry sputters, “Bpwguh, What!”
“But he didn- there wasn’t- like, I had distance!” Wally is getting incoherent again with Barry trying again to get him to just. Calm. Down.
At this point they both have gotten to the computers that connect with the Justice League network and Wally is running the program that should reveal any timespace anomalies.
The program has only barely started up and Barry was about to ask for more clarification when Wally’s phone starts ringing.
It’s godawful timing and Wally is about to push it away when he sees who is calling him.
Oh god… how is he going to explain what’s going on to her.
And he’s absolutely not going to hang up on her… so that means-
“Hey, uhm… I-”
Instead of… well he doesn’t know what he was expecting, but instead of that he’s greeted with her wrecked voice, “Thank you, oh, thank you so much.”
followed by a muffled, “mom you’re suffocating me.”
Wally feels faint, “I have to go-” and he sorta shouts, “I’ll be right there just gimmeasec!” into his phone. He can feel embarrassed about basically screaming into her ear later.
Barry is still processing what he just heard himself but he's hot on Wally’s heels.
Both of them are at her house in the next second.
And there they find her holding Danny close while standing in the kitchen, it seems like the boy is doing most of the work keeping her standing.
“Dad! Where were you?! Can you help-?” Wally tries… something, but the moment he gets close enough she has a grip on him too and he gets pulled right into a trap that’s more effective than anything his rogues so far have managed to come up with.
After a moment instead of helping Barry pulls out his own phone and takes a picture. It’s more important that this moment gets immortalized in his opinion.
Red Hood comes back and everything's the same except Bruce doesn't realise that while Jason's still pissed at him, it's more of a familial feud than it is a genuine casting himself away from the family forever. Jason's under the impression that what's going on between him and B is just normal teenage rebellion- after all, Dick basically did the same shit when they were younger, he remembers sitting on top of the stairs and listening to the arguments, hell he remembers eating popcorn while stood in the middle of a couple of them. they're a family of fucked up vigilantes, it makes sense to him that their father-son brawls are just as dramatic as the rest of their lives.
after the rooftop showdown where Bruce saves the Joker he gets into the batmobile, slightly depressed that he has to go back home and tell Alfred that he failed oh so spectacularly at convincing Jason to come home and probably actually made things a 100% worse and oh god when he finds out about the batarang-
Red Hood opens the passenger door and gets into the car
Jason: jesus christ B are you THAT fucking stubborn? YOU ALMOST DECAPITATED ME WITH THAT THING
Bruce:
Jason: whatever. actually, don't fucking talk to me. I'm not continuing this until next patrol where trust me I WILL be shooting you in the neck.
Bruce: ...w-
Jason: CAN YOU HURRY UP AND FUCKING DRIVE ALREADY? Jesus it's fucking freezing out and the heater isn't even on!
Bruce has absolutely no fucking clue what's going on. He continues to stare in the very rare Batman Bafflement that only his kids have ever managed to get out of him.
Is Jason... coming home with him?
He's so shocked at the sudden turn of events, so scared of flinching slightly in the wrong direction and ruining whatever the fuck convinced his son to actually get in the car with him, that he decides in a moment of pure panic to not question it. He turns the car on, silently turns on the heater, and proceeds to white knuckle the steering wheel and stiffly drive back to the manor, terrified that even breathing too loud will disrupt the way the Red Hood is spitefully messing with the radio station until it's playing Bruce's least favourite station at a way-too-loud volume.
when they get home Jason flips Bruce off and goes straight to the kitchen, dishing himself up some food from the dinner table with a couple of casual greeting grunts as if everyone isn't staring at him in shock and awe. Bruce comes in behind him and shrugs helplessly. Dick's face has gone white, and he's clutching his glass so hard it's started to splinter in his hands. Tim's the only person who manages to get past it all, blinking up at Jason's massive hulking frame.
Tim: I thought you hated us now
Jason: *eating, gives a questioning hum*
Tim: you keep fighting with Batman
Jason: yeah, fuck batman. I'm so pissed at him right now
Bruce: h-
Jason: Shut the fuck up I'm still mad at you.
Jason, to Tim: it's family tradition to hate Bruce and strike out on your own. Doesn't mean I shouldn't be allowed Alfie's impeccable cooking.
Tim:
Tim: ...you also tried to kill me
Jason: you replaced me as Robin. an attempt on your life is also family tradition. Dick tried to kill me a month after I took up the mantle
Tim:
Dick, so exasperated it breaks him out of his shock: oh come on, it was not a murder attempt-
Jason, slamming his fist on the table: I HAVE A PEANUT ALLERGY AND YOU TRIED TO FEED ME A SNICKERS BAR!
Dick: FOR THE LAST TIME I DIDN'T KNOW-
Bruce, desperate: boys-
Jason, whirling around: WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT TALKING TO ME?
Bruce:
Jason: oh that reminds me. hey Alfred? guess what B did like twenty minutes ago.
Alfred: ..?
Bruce: Jaylad please-
Jason: he threw a batarang at my neck.
Alfred:
Bruce:
Alfred: master Bruce-
Bruce quite honestly would have preferred it if Jason was a villain instead of a rebellious teen.
I feel like Tim goes with it in a way that deeply uncomfortable for Bruce. Like Tim hears that Jason considers trying to kill a family tradition and turns to Bruce and Dick with a frown, going 'You couldn't have told me about this? I wouldn't have freaked out nearly as hard if I realized it was tradition. What if I made a bad impression on Jason'
I was thinking, regarding Damian's murder attempts, that Damian still tries to kill Tim, as the interloper/pretender/enemy, and Tim is pissed but not because Damian is trying to kill him but that it is going in wrong direction. How is Tim supposed to welcome Damian into the family properly if he the tradition keeps going in the wrong direction
Tim, aggravated: No, that's- that's not how it's supposed to go. You're ruining this for me. You come in, Bruce takes Robin from me and gives it to you. I blow up at him, storm off, do my own thing, come back with a new hero identity and suit, and then I try to kill you! It's my turn!
Damian, confused but taking notes: Oh. I see. I should then anticipate a proper assassination attempt. I expect you to be up to par.
Both nod seriously, ignoring Bruce having a conniption in the background.
comic-style art I made inspired by 'when in gotham: don't drink the water' by @wesslan on ao3 - from that one scene when dick discovers tim drinking the water 💕
Danny is a sort of Disney princess with animals. Not alive ones though, they hate him. The ghost animals of Gotham City absolutely adore him. Harley Quinn watches from her window as a teenager with a glowing raccoon on one shoulder, a tiny scraggly kitten on the other, and a half dozen glowing green rats trailing behind him, just walks past her apartment.
Second (after actually assessing the situation): He loves these strange meta-animals and they clearly love him! Maybe I COULD have a younger sibling...
Too late Damian. Harley and Ivy have already adopted him. You'll have to marry him if you want him in the family.
Meanwhile Danny? Has been causing chaos with his new Moms. He's having the best time! He got to make a villain persona? With a costume and everything? Nice! New moms let Danny cause problems??? Hell yeah!
Later that night they get to see what Damian meant by dangerpus, but not for him. The tiny, seriously tiny, spheres were thrown after a fleeing gang member. And unfolded into an electrified net. That apparently only Damian himself could turn off....
Tim: How?!?!?? There's no way these wires should be able to do that!
Damian: Tt. Just because you cannot make such a tool does not disqualify others from doing so!
Jason: Holy shit! Can you get me in touch with your supplier? I am willing to pay for a set of those!
Damian: I shall ask them. This set was a gift after all. Made for me specifically. They may have other ideas for you.
-------
Harley: You made me a proper hammer space!!!! You absolute mad lad! How much can I got in this????
Pam: Hmm. I enjoy the way you created a full set of clean energy generators. And the new hydroponics system dear.
Danny: No problem! And! It can fit anything up to 4 square metres!
After much badgering Damian finally allows his siblings to meet Danny in costume. Danny of course is happy to meet them. He knows how much his Starlight cares for them. As oddly as he may show it! So they all meet in a safe house. Danny is already there, in full costume. Yes he even has the muzzle on. Shaped like a hyena snout. His shirt while heavily protective? Still has a pattern on it. 'Careful, I bite' (Danny finds it funny. Harley can't disagree.) It's usually hidden under the reinforced leather jacket. This is the first time the batsibs have seen him without it. Dick and Steph? Are about to cry from laughing. Danny just sits cuddled up to Damian radiating smug glee.
Danny: So! Starlight says you want my designs? As well as, presumably to do the whole shovel talk thing?
Jason: Nah. Only Big Wing cares about that second part. I want mad science gadgets. And I'm willin to pay.
Tim: I need to know how they work! Robin won't let me touch them!
Damian: It was a courting gift from my beloved! Which I have no guarantee you can put back together correctly! I will not allow you to damage it!
Danny cuddled Damian more. While running a hand through his hair. Damian is just say there basking in the affection. Much to the surprise of his siblings. Holy shit. Hyena must be the one.
Danny: I will always make more for you Starlight! But I understand why you won't let your brother touch them. Sure. I'm happy to set up a meeting to discuss the design and price! Mama Harls set me up with a workshop! Plant Momma helps me scavenge the local area for useable parts. Recycling yay!
Steph: So! How'd they find you anyway?
Danny: Oh you know. Had to run away from home for my own safety. Mama Harls saw me with my friends. She was curious and brought out her best boys for a playdate. It just kinda went from there!
Jason: How's that going? I know the clown can be.... An issue for them.
Danny: Oh. You guys don't know yet! Starlight! You didn't tell them?
Damian:.... No beloved, I did not.
Jason: Explain.
Danny: I broke all his bones. He's currently in a body cast? And I made sure to break em bad enough they'll never heal right!
Jason: I approve demon brat. He makes great toys. And he ducked up the clown.
Steph: Wait..... Is that the John Doe in the hospital? How did they not know it's him?
Danny:.... Might have shaved all his hair off. And his face IS one big bruise. I'm sure they'll figure it out once they run his prints or whatever.
Tim: ..... No one tells B. Also, Can I please visit your workshop and swap tips?!?!?!
Danny: Sure. May as well get to know my future in laws!
Batman is silently having conniptions. Their new rogue is dangerous Damian! Very dangerous! Why him? Did you choose him to torment me? Is that what this is? His sonic attack is stronger than Black Canarys! He needs a sit down. A break. A night where none of his kids give him a damn heart attack!!!!
Hood.... Hood what are you holding? Tell me you didn't get Hyena to make you that. RR... Where are you going? What do you mean it's science time? We have perfectly good workshops at home! Why do all his kids like Hyena so much!!! (He fully understands. If Hyena had been around when he first started? He likely would have befriended him.)
But his baby! His youngest! Is saying he wants to marry him!!! No! Absolutely not! Not any time soon anyway! And Harley is no help. She keep encouraging the boys! She's a menace! Oh no.... Harley is going to be his in law.... Selina will be delighted.
It was no secret that Jon had a crush on Damian. At least not after Clark publicly blamed him for his little boy growing up, something about Damian inheriting Bruce’s bat like charms.
All Bruce had to do was inject Jon into the paradigm and hope that he disrupts their relationship enough for the two of them to break up.
The worst thing that could happen is that Bruce ends up being Clark’s in law….
the only positive point is that harley has certain medical ethics and as a family member can no longer apply as their therapist, not that she won't continue to tell them that he should consult someone
Bruce had been trying to avoid Clark. He hasn't realised adding Jon to the mix would... And as it did. And Clark? Was not pleased. Not at all. He could feel Clark glaring at him as he tried to leave the gala. Diana was grinning at him. The traitor kept stalking him. To give Clark a chance to catch up. He knew his kids had been talking to her.... Apparently they were all traitors.
Clark finally managed to catch up with Diana's help. And quickly slung a friendly arm over his shoulders. In a way that would make escape difficult. Bruce tried regardless. He did not want to have this discussion. Not one bit. Sadly his children and friends? We're working together to force the issue.
Bruce: I'm grounding all of them!
Diana: Aww. They will be so disappointed! They just want to make sure you two don't fall out entirely. And I've heard good things about their Disney Prince!
Clark: Diana! He's a menace! And Bruce! Encouraged my baby to get involved! He runs around wearing a muzzle! A Muzzle!
Diana: Don't forget the leather jacket. Or the piercings. I'm sure tattoos will come in time!
Bruce: I was trying to get Damian to forget his obsession with him! Get him to move to Jon! How was I to know it would end up with the three of them!
Clark: He managed to give my baby a love bite Bruce! Jon! A love bite! That he refuses to cover up!
Bruce: Like Damian is any better! He decided to come to the gala tonight! Just to ditch his the and open the collar! Look at him! He's practically preening about it! You think I'm any happier than you!?!?
Diana: Oh come now! I recall seeing you show off plenty of your own!
Bruce: The best can chew through rebar Diana! And Damian lets him chew on his neck!
------
Danny was doing a last minute check on his outfit. It was very goth, Mama Harls had helped him pick. And Plant Mom had helped with the accessories. Danny refused to wear ties. So he went for an old fashioned cravat. Frankly he looked a bit vampiric. And he was tempted to let his fangs show..
Damian had invited him to the gala. But Bruce said he wasn't allowed. Jokes on him! Jason was gonna smuggle him in the back! Jon was there as Damian's date. And they both looked super hot! Danny was so very lucky to have two cute, hot, wonderful boyfriends! It was just a shame their dad's didn't like him. But it was whatever. Their siblings liked him! That was good enough! And Jon's Ma and Pa liked him too!
Danny had absolutely been tempted to crash the gala as Hyena and kidnap his partners. But they asked him not to. So using his connections it was! Ope! That was Jason's motorbike! Time to go! He knew he was grinning a bit too wide as Jason cackled seeing his outfit. Danny did a slow twirl, followed by a flamboyant bow. Jason gamely played along and clapped like a good audience.
Jason: Welp! Your gonna give the old man and Uncle Clark a heart attack! This is going to be the best gala in a long time!
Ooh, between Danny's outfit and Jon and Damian's "love bites," the upper echelons of Gotham society are all gonna leave this gala believing the youngest Wayne has gotten himself involved in a throuple with a Vampire.
Which, may, perhaps, be the entire reason Danny dressed that way. He may be enjoying this whole 'bad influence boyfriend' thing. Seeing Batman and Superman cringe when he is affectionate to his Star Light and Sunshine? Priceless. Besides, his boyfriends thought he looked pretty!
What Bruce and Clark don’t know…is that as much as he pretends to be a bad boy…Danny is the sweetest and and most innocent out of the three. All those love bites? The acting out? Yeah…they’re gonna need to have a talk with their own sons. (Also, Danny may or may not have gotten the leather jacket and piercings look inspired by Kon. He loves it though.)
Clark stared in disbelief at the sight in front of him. Jon, his precious baby, his tiny son. Was using weapons made by Hyena to fight his rogues.
Clark: Why? You don't even need weapons?!?
Jon: Dad! He made it for me special! It's an EMP. Just localised and short range. So I can fight these things quicker. Making it safer for civilians! He's so thoughtful and kind!
Clark: He's a BAD influence! He's a rogue! A thief! A criminal! You should be arresting him! Not, not dating him! And using his weapons!!
Jon: I don't care! I like him! Robin does too! And he only goes after corrupt people! He's not like Luthor! He's good!
Lois is living for it. She fully approves. Gets interviews with all parties. Prints all the news. Superboy and Robin's scandalous relationship? The people love it. Seeing Superman and Superboy get into a "But Papa, I love him!" . In public? Oh that shit sells. Superboy is even using tools made by his partner? Who made them to help? So sweet. Finding out Robin has been using his tech for months? Red Robin and Red Hood too?
And then Clark and Bruce try to stage an intervention, but in retaliation, Jon and Dami go on strike.
Which in reality just means Damian asks Babs and Tim to get him and his Boyfriends a private penthouse where Supes and Bats wouldn't find them for a couple day to weeks and he can just live out domestic bliss with his Beloveds.
They rented a luxury pent house in Central. Because Clark and Bruce wouldn't think to look in Flash's city. Flash also wouldn't tell on them. Damian has blackmail. And Danny has sweet tech bribes. The three of them have a wonderful holiday. Clark and Bruce? Might be going insane. Lois and Alfred sit them down for a chat pointedly ask how this would have worked on them. Bruce? Did you ever stop when Alfred disapproved? Clark, would you have dumped me is Ma told you to? Hm? How likely is it that they are acting out even more to spite you?
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