Courier Six Did Nothing Wrong

Hi, I'm Raitlor! - Age: 20+ - Asexual/Aromantic - Genderqueer - She/her/they/them pronouns - Please yell at me if you need something tagged I'm really bad at remembering to tag things.

[cute-pluto]

ive just been born into the world what are some good games for beginners

[rendogdomesticated]

this one won goty five yrs in a row and i heard its got awesome ratings

[chongoblog]

Tier List

S Tier: Green Line - High up and long circular motions are the sauce. Absolute banger.

A Tier: Blue Line - Nothing special in terms of line structure, but the texture on the beads are what make this one so great

B Tier: Yellow Line - The Right Angled motions are honestly mesmerizing

C Tier: Orange Line - The Vertical Up and Down motions can be fun but it just comes across as clunky

F Tier: Red Line - What are you even doing

[bananonbinary]

are you fucking kidding me the red line beads are a FAR more compelling texture than the blue line. “oh but the red line is booring.” the appeal is in how it interacts with and highlights the other lines you philistine. without the red line there’s no cohesion at all. read a book.

[nfirr]

Literally hop off. Red doesn’t even use gravity as an element in the main route. Orange is one of the only three lines (with green and yellow) to actually use gravity to add complexity to the route, and is honestly an underrated pick. Have fun playing “push left” simulator with red. Idiot.

[felidthing]

via @wrenrouge

[mostlycatsmostly]

Not sure what to call this

[sisterreisaid]

[joeinct]

Photo by Kira Gyngazova

[heinousactszx]

[tumbwr]

[doublevampires]

thanks @bmoharrisbankofficial but unfortunately i can’t focus on the very important message here because i’m too busy being confused by the fact that apparently if you send an ask with only one letter tumblr will bold that letter in the “asked you” notification text?? why the fuck would that be the case

[doublevampires]

fascinating

[triviallytrue]

what the fuck is the backend of this site like

[homoidiotic]

i Love vaccines, autism, abortions, homosexuals, sex changes and crime

[thesearethedaysofmylife]

[gallusrostromegalus]

So while I was getting my haircut, the lady asked me if I had other plans for the day and I said:

“I’m just going to pick up the boy from daycare and then it’s date night.”

And the lady says “Oh! How old is he?”

“He’s three.”

“Mine too! Where are you registering him for kindergarten it’s such a hassle-”

And that’s when I realized I said “boy” and not “dog” because I always think of Charlie as “good boy” but this slip up has lead to a miscommunication.

The lady is now 6 minutes into a clearly needed rant about how unnecessarily complex shopping for schools is, esp when you have a neurodivergent child, so I can’t just tell her that Charlie is a dog because then she’ll feel awkward for unloading on me and she clearly has enough going on.

So the rest of the haircut became a game of “how much can I say about Charlie without revealing that he is not a human child?” And the answer is “enough to cover a half hour hair appointment, quite possibly several hours worth if I’m specific enough”

[gallusrostromegalus]

“is he very verbal?”

“It really depends on who he’s with. He’s very quiet at he but won’t shut up if he’s at the park or has a friend over.”

“was it hard to potty-train him?”

“he’s adopted, but I was genuinely amazed at how good he already was with hygene and potty stuff.”

“mine’s just obsessed with paw patrol and Frozen, drives me crazy!”

“I imagine. Charlie is colorblind so he’s not as into tv, but he always wants a toy if I take him anywhere with them.”

“oh gosh the toys! And the kids are so rough on them!”

“yeah Charlie can destroy a stuffed animal in about 2 minutes, so I only buy him the really cheap ones.”

“Does he throw tantrums when they break?”

“Not really. It’s meditative, really, taking them apart. He has hysterics if the cat takes his toys though. Runs downstairs and cries at me until I retrieve it because he’s not tall enough to get it out of the cat tree.”

[gallusrostromegalus]

The Very Good Boy in question, Charleston Chew.

(if you want to read more of my much weirder adventures, I have pre-orders for my book on Patreon right now: https://www.patreon.com/gallusrostromegalus )

[krwzprtt]

[shutupmerlin]

A series of events:

1. I put in an Annual Leave request form almost 3 weeks ago and my boss has not approved it yet

2. I went into my office today and replaced every single writing utensil with crayons in preparation for April Fools Day on Monday

3. Whilst searching for pens to remove, I found my unsigned Annual Leave form in my boss’s drawer

4. I placed my unsigned Annual Leave form in a photo frame and put in on his desk

5. The frame I used was from a photo of his kids that I deemed less important than my Leave form

6. My boss sometimes goes into the office on Saturdays to work

7.

[aerialsquid]

I appreciate the context of 1-6 or else 7 might have had some very concerning implications.

[nelsonakis]

We are going to hell

[play-now-my-lord]

7-11 CLERK: lovely day outside, isn't it ME: uhhh ME INTERNALLY: shit. I didn't notice. How do I continue this conversation MY INNER MONOLOGUE: Service workers love it when you tell them the things mortal men were not meant to know, when you speak to them of principalities and powers upon the earth ME: In the sun a wheel, in the wheel another wheel. Do you see? 7-11 CLERK: Yes, I see! ME: For each turn of the outer wheel, one thousandth a turn of the inner wheel. And within the inner wheel a point of perfect darkness 7-11 CLERK: Right, growing, devouring. The death of all light ME: Wanes the light - right - wanes the light and waxes the solar eye. Wanes the day of flesh and blood and waxes the night of crawling beasts. Chewing and swallowing. The name of the night to come is khoshek ha-gibbor 7-11 CLERK: Is that hot dog a quarter pound big bite or a spicy bite. They're priced different ME: Which one is cheaper

[kajamnikk]

this is so insanely accurate i dont even know what to say

[brokenbatterii]

[doggirlinspace]

[atomic-clowns]

[kittygaycat]

[newtsfrogstoads]

Going from being an introverted lurker on reddit to trying to post my own stuff here is so wild. I keep typing out a post, deleting it, then retyping because I think it's not good enough but then I look at other posts and why am I so worried?

It's like I'm at a fancy Italian restaurant and keep glancing around the room to see which hand people use to pick up the forks. But then I realize that everyone is shoveling spaghetti into their mouths using their bare hands and I'm like ah okay so I'm clearly overthinking this

[newtsfrogstoads]

This restaurant is absolute chaos and I'm giving it 5 stars

[lawfulgoodness]

Apparently OP never saw us shove all those breadsticks in our purse.

[jame7t]

I reprogrammed the sex robot to start killing btw

[tira3sii]

[stochastic-shieldmaiden]

Astronomy I-

[anon-e-has-a-tmblr]

Archaeology: it is mandatory, it is ritualic.

[beowulf22121]

Fun fact about archeology!

if it's a rock and you lick it, your tongue got a little dirty.

If it's a bone, it sticks to your tongue.

Bones remember being inside a body where they could be wet all the time, and they want to return to that state.

[shortgremlinman]

Cheers science side of Tumblr. Never say that again though

[rhymingwithpurple]

ok so here's the thing