Conservatives accidentally doing this never gets old
based
dont any of you dare forget this gem i quote this daily
Extremely well played

PR's Tumblrdome
macklin celebrini has autism

shark vs the universe
★
$LAYYYTER
untitled

Game Changer & Make Some Noise
EXPECTATIONS
Sade Olutola

Product Placement

pixel skylines
The Bright Sessions
Not today Justin
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
NASA
Doug Jones

tannertan36
Mike Driver
Color Me Curious

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from Romania

seen from Indonesia

seen from Russia

seen from Russia
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Malaysia
seen from Ecuador

seen from Canada
seen from Malaysia
seen from Congo - Brazzaville
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye

seen from United States

seen from Türkiye
@ninjacatjedi
Conservatives accidentally doing this never gets old
based
dont any of you dare forget this gem i quote this daily
Extremely well played
Saw a commercial that said “without the letters A B and O there’d be no you”
It was about blood types
As someone versed in fanfic tagging, that’s not the first thing I thought of
This needs to go with the deli sign that asked, “how do you top your sub?”.
This is now officially a thread for things that make fanficcers stop and blink
Please add more
i don’t want to reblog this but i genuinely want to read more examples so
May I present:
This monstrosity
Every time I see the title of this TV show on the program guide I do a double-take
My humble contributions
My Twinkies Halloween edition
I’ve had this saved on my phone for like a year and I just …
Call out post for literally everyone I know and also me.
I will never be over needing to reset my password on my Prime account only to be granted my OTP.
My One True Password.
I died.
the inherent eroticism of helping your lover to dress
This is it this is a major kink. Blame all the period dramas. But I've developed a thing about it. Extra points if you're not lovers, she's just your servant, but OH you want to be. There's nothing more homoerotic that someone slowly, submissivly--trying not to touch bare skin as that would be inappropriate-- lacing you, tying you, doing up buttons you can't see. Smoothing down layers of billowing fabric in a parody of the caresses you can't give flesh. Making sure everything looks just right . And then taking me in with your eyes, all the sumptuous fabric and finery and knowing that if I look perfect it is because of you. For you.
i think star trek should write an in universe reason why some series don’t have swearing and some do. make it a universal translator glitch or something.
the captain of each ship can turn the swears on or off when they want to
Kirk would have kept the swears on but any ship carrying Dr. Leonard McCoy is required by Starfleet regulations to turn them off
How dare you keep this in the tags @narwhalsarefalling
“Imagine if people had been going ‘don’t fight hate with hate’ back when Hitler was around.”
Fam…let me tell you bout Poland.
Let me tell you about how the entire rest of Europe sat ack and watched the invasion of Poland because they thought it would be “improper” to send military aid. How they were unwilling to enforce the treaties that Germany was breaking, because that would make them “just as bad.” They sat back and wrote strongly worded letters while fascists grew in power because they didn’t want to dirty their hands. They thought reasonable discussion and politics would be enough to stop a fascist dictator from rising to power.
Spoiler alert: it wasn’t enough.
like yes, people literally did try that argument then too.
Everywhere there’s fascists there are fascist apologists hiding under the guise of pacifism, ready to enable their shit and demonize resistance.
What if silence is in fact a sound, but because its a universal sound we just adapted to it and dont notice it anymore
I actually just wrote a paper on this!!
The short of it is, yes, that's exactly what happens. There's no such thing as pure silence outside of a vacuum (and inside a vacuum you'd be dead). So basically your ears are constantly adapting to the noise threshold of your surroundings and slowly ignoring it. If you were in a perfectly silent room (anechoic chambers are cool!) you would actually start to hear the sound of existing!
In film class we learned that you need to record the silence in a room for at least two minutes or so and save it before you start shooting there. This is called "roomtone" and is done so you can put it into every bit of artificial silence later- if your editor decides it's best to cut the sound so there will be a longer gap between lines of dialogue, for instance, the artificial silence in between will sound weird to the viewers and break their immersion, because it isn't the silence of that room as they're been hearing it so far.
Room tone is also useful to overlay if you need to re-record any lines later or that kind of stuff, I think, but. I didn't listen THAT much in film class
This is pretty much why active noise cancelling works too!
I recall reading about a performance of some kind whose first "sound" involved a sudden, heavy, oppressive silence, and they arranged that by artificially creating a noisy roomtone---before the performance started, before people were coming into their seats even, the speakers were already outputting a soundscape of white noise, electronic hums, air vent noises, et cetera, so when the audience was all seated and the performance started, the sudden cutoff of all the existing noise made a major contrast that got everyone's attention without so much as a sound.
hey do you guys know about the uncomfortably horny BDSM song cut from Disney’s Aladdin
no but I wanna
it’s called “Humiliate The Boy” and it’s just line after line of Jafar making it Weird™️
including the very real lyrics “oh, we’ll emasculate him slowly/all the better to enjoy/how delicious to humiliate the boy”
Disney why
Disney I can’t kinkshame fast enough to keep up with this shit
after learning Ursula’s character design was based on a (truly splendid) drag queen, I just sort of got lazy with assuming she would always be the most salacious disney villain.
but apparently Jafar is a dom with a thing for twinks & humiliation play so what do i know
I don’t think I’d call Ursula especially salacious–she makes jokes implying that men only want sex, and she moves like a theatre major at the grocery store with their friends, but I wouldn’t describe her as horny.
I guess Frollo has a whole song about how horny he is, and both Gaston and Jafar also have “marry the heroine but in an evil way” as motives.
Ursula is comfortable in her sexuality. Frollo is horny on main but trying to deny it. Gaston and, apparently, Jafar are horny period, with Gaston being mysoginistc and Jafar having a humiliation kink
Oh dear
ok someone do an alignment chart
I made an alignment chart because I needed something to occupy my time. no one but frollo is on the “conflicted” bar because no other disney villain is anything but 100% comfortable with their sexuality and that’s that about that. gaston is evilly sexy, not evilly horny, because the only person gaston is horny for is gaston.
also, did we NOT already know jafar was kinky? was the slave girl outfit and hypnokink not a huge giveaway?
I love tumblr coz where else would I read a serious analysis of Disney villains in terms of them being sexy/kinky/horny while listening to a very disturbing kinky Jafar song
someone replace “but conflicted” with “but a creep” and add scar and hades
Perfect
#the real reason i’ll stay forever on this godforsaken website#truly groundbreaking analysis just like this @fiddleabout
i’m glad Rattigan is getting the rep he’s due, A+ 10/10, solid reading of the character
the kids are confused about Rattigan
@bemusedlybespectacled are you happy with the chaos you have caused?
@whatdoyoumeanitsnotawesome
Good news: if you’re currently laying around and not producing anything, you are a credit to your species.
I’m an ant biologist and I’d like to point out that ants also spend a significant percentage of the time doing nothing.
Turns out sometimes the most evolutionary useful thing you can do is chill and not wear yourself to shreds, whether mammal or insect. It helps you deal with emergencies and adapt to change. Plus, you can act as living food storage!
That last part is probably more an ant thing than a human thing, but hey, live your dreams.
it’s also a bear thing, which absolutely explains me
Doing absolutely fuck-all is how antarctic sea sponges live to be over 10,000 years old, so live your best, longest, laziest life.
Remember lions? Fellow apex predators?
Yeah, they spend 16-20 hours of the day laying around, socializing, raising Cubs and napping.
The last 4-8 hours are spent hunting.
Wait wait, they’re not a primate so they don’t count.
How about Orangutans?
Well, they spend 90% of their time awake just hanging out in food-rich areas, eating fruit and leaves, socializing, raising children, and chilling.
Well, they’re not people so it doesn’t-
How about Stone Age people in Europe?
They probably worked 3-5 hours per day, every day. (Though seasonal changes in food scarcity could change that)
Laborers in ancient Egypt worked 8 hours, with an hour break at lunch. They did this for 8 days, then rested 2 days. That sounds familiar. Except… they also had regular time off for festivals and holidays, and only worked for about 18 out of every 50 days.
Artisans in imperial Rome generally worked from 6am to Noon, and then had the rest of the day off… and only worked for half the year, due to all the holidays and festivals they got off.
But that’s too easy, what about a Peasant in medieval England?
6-8 hours per day, with Sundays off, Farm workers put in longer hours at harvest time but worked shorter days in winter when there are fewer hours of daylight. Economist Juliet Schor estimates that in the period following the Plague they worked no more than 150 days a year, due to the long holidays and many festivals.
Ugh, let’s go poorer. 17th century France. Starvation was afoot for the working poor!
During the reign of King Louis XIV, the workers of France had it tough, and hunger for the poorest was a fact of life. The typical working day was as much as 12 hours long, but two hours were set aside midday for lunch and perhaps an afternoon nap. Nevertheless, the Ancient Régime is said to have also guaranteed peasants, labourers and other workers a total of 52 Sundays, 90 rest days and 38 religious holidays off per year, meaning they worked just 185 out of 365 days.
So what changed?
The industrial revolution, baybe~~
New factory owners could work their employees to the bone due to a lack of regulation and abundance of cheap labour.
The typical factory worker in mid 19th-century England toiled away for a soul-destroying 16 hours a day, six days a week, 311 days per year!
THAT nightmare became the standard by which western society began to judge “work-life balance” and anything gentler than the industrial factory’s unfettered brutality is considered “softness”
(So many people died being mangled in those machines. Hair handkerchiefs went into style during American industrialization because working women would otherwise get their hair caught in the machines, and be either scalped or be bodily pulled inside to die…. But that’s a horror for another time)
Americans in 2020 worked an average of 8.5 hours per day on weekdays, plus another 5 hours on weekends.
Taking out federal holidays and weekends, we work 262 days per year. Most of us get 5-9 sick days to take per year. (Yes, a fixed number, no matter how sick you really are), and usually either no paid vacation, or 7-15 days paid vacation, depending on seniority and the company. Unpaid vacation doesn’t have a max, but taking it often risks you getting fired.
Even comparing against the poorest laborers in ancient history the current working structure for humans is, frankly, inhumane.
We are mammals. Let us rest. Let us celebrate holidays and attend festivals. Let us attend to our homes and families.
Even the ultra wealthy folks who got their heads chopped off gave us more time off than this!!!
Someone in the comments said something like “humans are instinctively industrious and productive, as social creatures!”
Buddy, that’s a lie fed to you by capitalism.
In our default state, we attend to our families yes, but we also party like hell, lounge around, and make fantastic works of art just to be proud of ourselves. We made beautiful things for the joy of creating them.
Stone Age humans may have spent a couple hours hunting and gathering, but DEFINITELY spent loads of time painting every available surface. Time and weather washed most of it away, but some places like Arizona and Colorado still preserve a few of the endless murals made by ancient hands.
Evidence shows that the ancient world was COVERED in paintings and etchings - just saturated with images of birds and beasts and humans, sunsets and cool weather. We invented mythologies and painted about them. We did something impressive, and painted about it. We taught our children how to paint and lifted them into our shoulders so they could mark the ceiling.
In our most base state, humans will work enough to survive, but our instincts demand we use all other time to create art. We want to communicate. To make connections.
“Working” or “being productive” is not on that list.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk.
king arthur was supposed to rise when the worlds need was greatest so. wakey wakey! someone knock on his tomb or something
i hate fae rules
Zazzles: LIES! SLANDER!
you INSULT Zazzles? You insult his reputation like the football?
my favourite instagram account is “wheredoesthepeecomeout” and it’s run by a girl who asks men on tinder where cis women pee from and then documents their answers
some highlights:
everybody sit down we have a winner
Oh my fucking God lmao
This is so easy, it comes from the balls
[video: a seal emerges from a hole in the ice to breathe. It yells “Ah! Woo!” then sinks back down]
The ahh was so much deeper and the woo so much softer than i could have expected i love it
i love listening to my fiancée drawing
“no stop” “oh no i didn’t mean to do that” “wRONG LAYER” “wait go back” “what line is that?!” “cAN YOU– [irritated noises]” “oh you…bastard” “what..layer is that on??”
she’s so cute djksfh
A gift for your fiancee
oh my god dkfjdhgksdjk
there’s dozens of stories about some kid from our world falling into a different, magical one, being the chosen one or the close companion of the chosen one and saving the world, and then going home where they’re delighted to see their family again and have a new appreciation of their own life. but what about someone who didn’t miss it? what if you save the world and you’re given your medal and stripped of the magic you learned and put back in a world you never missed? and you’re furious.
maybe you gave up a few years of your life. you have callouses and muscles and a few scars and maybe a missing eye or something. you definitely have some blood on your hands. you might have PTSD you can’t talk to anyone about. and suddenly you’re fifteen again, in a body that’s too soft and too short and too complete. you’re always cold because there’s no magic burning in your veins anymore, and even as you grow up the feeling of not fitting doesn’t go away because when you look in the mirror at eighteen you look all wrong: this is not what you’re supposed to look like at eighteen. the sky clouds and you rub at the phantom ache of injuries this body never received. you wake up screaming sometimes remembering the sorcerer who burnt your hand to ashes, or the final battle you almost didn’t make it through, or the moment you felt the magic in you go out.
but here’s the thing: they took you and made you into a weapon that was determined enough and powerful enough to save a whole world. they can put you back where they found you but they can’t undo everything. and there’s this, too: the place between worlds clings to you. you can’t tease fire out of the air but you can feel the pull of the doorways all the time, although none of them so far go to your world.
but you try to make it work for a decade, anyway. you’re dutiful. but one night you leave work late and for the thousandth time you catch yourself searching the sky for firebirds. and you break. of the three portals within five hundred miles, one is a howling, frozen wasteland and one is a deep violet void, but one opens into a misty forest that you step into and don’t look back. it’s not your world, but if you keep going long enough, you’ll get there.
(and maybe much, much later, hundreds of worlds later, you climb through a window, or a door of woven branches int he middle a field, or push aside a curtain, and as you set foot on new land you feel the fire in your veins and sparks at your fingertips and finally, finally, you’re home)
This this this is it this is my favorite thing in the world
jojo siwa is like. her style is not my taste at all but as soon as other people call it annoying im like actually you're wrong she's an icon and a legend
she looks like the concentrated essence of a claires store and i do not mean this negatively
it’s the “fuck you” to the current trend of encouraging teenagers to look 24 and embracing girly things that cis men hate
American Kawaii
she looks like someone turned a Skittles commercial into a person and i love it
If you don’t mind me putting my two cents:
I feel like Jojo Siwa’s style is reminiscent of the colorful teen girl fashion of the late 2000s and early 10s. Back then it was considered fashionable to use lots of colors, accessories, etc. Take a look at Jojo Siwa:
Very colorful, generous with sparkles and accessories. It’s meant to be fun!
If you were a kid in 2007-2012 you saw something similar in the clothing the teens in your sitcoms wore, although not as exaggerated. The fashion in Shake It Up(which came out in 2010) is a really good example of this:
(You may laugh, but this was the height of fashion to 13 year old me.)
The point is, Jojo’s aesthetic is similar to being a young pre teen girl walking into Limited Too for the first time.
And the reason cishet men hate it is because they don’t find it attractive. That’s why she’s often made fun of and used as a joke so much. Because that style doesn’t cater to the male gaze. It’s not for them, so it must be bad.
I wanna say it again for yall: if you see a deer that doesn’t look right and doesn’t act right it’s probably chronic wasting disease
Document it and your location and contact the DNR
I promise you it’s not a “notdeer”. It’s just being destroyed by a prion disease.
Be responsible and help track it. Hell. Contact animal control and see if they would like to cull it.
CWD does NOT kill humans. In fact it cannot even spread to us currently.
The closest link they’ve been able to infect is a monkey. They injected its SPINE with it.
You don’t want to handle the meat to accidentally infect the area around you as it can spread in the water. You also want to minimize human contact with it bc we don’t want it to develop to infect humans.
We barely understand prion diseases to begin with. We just want to minimize contact even tho it literally can’t infect humans as of now.
If you are a hunter minimize damage to the spine and brain when field dressing and even send in a sample to be tested for CWD.
Even if you pick up a roadkill deer you should send in a sample.
My warning is mainly because they are DANGEROUS PHYSICALLY. They are not well and stop acting like prey animals. They are more willing to lash out. They don’t have the reflex to run away the further it goes. Don’t get mauled.
"loki is the new tumblr sexyman" bro hes an original. hes one of the blueprints. this isnt new, this is just a revival
"loki is the new tumblr sexyman" what's next. are we going to make posts going hey guys I just discovered this bbc series called sherlock it's so good why does no one ever talk about it
a red sun rises. blood has been spilled this night
My username is almost 10 years old. Do not come to me and say he is the New Sexyman. I have known him as the sexyman for a decade.
June 26th 2012 I changed to this url. Tom has been the tumblr sexyman longer than that.